by C. E. Wilson
“I trust you with him. Tell Jordan that if he says one more bad thing to him to come to me and I’ll ground him to his room unless he’s in home school or therapy with you. He’ll even eat his meals in his room by himself.”
“Carson has some serious anger issues. I have to find out what has made him so angry. We both read his report, and it wasn’t near as bad as some of the other boys, but he has more anger in him than he should. I need to find out why.”
“It was before he came here. He was like that when he arrived, but he has gotten better since I don’t hit them. He knows I would never lay my hands on any of them.”
“I don’t think any of the boys here can complain about you. They all love you and are very protective of you, Carson, especially. He already gave me a warning.” Justin chuckled.
“No, he didn’t, did he really?”
“Yeah, but I’m not worried about him at all. I just wish the CPS report had more in it. I think after dinner I’m going to my office and go back over his report and see if I missed something in it. I don’t think so, but it won’t hurt to reread it. I’ll start his intense therapy Monday after he goes to your school. Getting a little crowded in the schoolroom with Jordan?”
“No, he’s such a sweet little boy. He’s a joy to teach. He’s astute too.”
“He already gave Simon his laptop. Simon said it would still be his, and he would teach him how to use it when he’s doing schoolwork.”
“Simon is another sweetheart. He’s accommodating around here. I don’t think Simon has any issues at all.”
“All our boys have issues of one type or another. I think even I have a bad issue.”
Hunter chuckled. “What’s your issue, Justin?”
“I want to kiss my man, and he’s busy fiddling with some bread.”
Hunter stopped making the garlic bread and turned around and gave Justin a big kiss. Justin pulled him closer and kissed him again. Justin was just going back after another kiss when Carson came into the kitchen. “What are you doing? That’s so gross. Can’t you wait until we go to bed to do that stuff?”
Carson turned to go back out of the kitchen when Hunter said, “Just a minute young man get your butt back here. I want to talk to you.”
Carson turned and came back to Hunter but gave Justin a dirty look. “Carson, why have you been so mean to Jordan. He’s a little boy. You’re three years older than he is, so why be mean to him. What did he do to you?”
“I wanted to put his tv and X-Box in my room for all of us to play, but he said he wanted it in his room. I just told him he was a stupid little kid. He gets everything and we get nothing. Do you think that’s fair?”
Justin said, “What Dr. Willis’ mother got Jordan was not his fault. He had nothing to do with that. Of course, he wanted his tv and system in his room so he and Steve could play it. He’s trying to share his things. He already gave Simon his laptop. I think you owe him an apology, Carson.”
Carson turned and glared at Justin. “Nobody asked you anything, so just shut up. I don’t want anything to do with you. I’m not gay.”
Justin just stood there, staring at him. Hunter said, “Carson, you’ll be grounded to your room for two weeks. You’ll only come out of there to do your schoolwork and for your sessions with Justin. Other than that, you are in your room. Someone will bring your meals to you.”
“You can’t do that, Hunter. I will go crazy in that room. I don’t even like Mark. I have to room with him and he’s a pig. I’ll run away from home.”
“I guess you don’t remember what the judge said when you were put with me. He said if any of you ran away, you would be put in juvie. Is that what you want? I can call him right now and tell him you would rather be there than here, and he’ll send an officer to escort you there.”
“I’ll stay in my room, but you have to make Mark clean it up. He throws everything all over the room.”
“Carson, you’re being punished. You’re not in a position to demand anything. You go to your room as soon as you apologize to Justin. You’ll act right when you have your sessions with him. I’m not playing with you. You’ll go to juvie if you keep acting like you are.”
“Hunter, he’s trying to say I’m gay and I’m not. Do I have to apologize?”
“He didn’t say a word about you being gay. He’s concerned for Jordan since Jordan is his son. Why do you think he’s saying you’re gay?”
“It’s the way he looks at me. It says that he thinks I’m gay.”
Justin looked at Hunter and raised a brow. Hunter shook his head and said. “Apologize to Justin and go to your room.”
“Sorry, Justin. I’ll go but this isn’t over yet.”
Carson turned and ran out of the kitchen, and they heard him running upstairs. Then they heard a door slam. Hunter started after him, but Justin stopped him. “Just let him stew for a while then go talk to him. He’ll be uncooperative right now and you don’t need the confrontation. I don’t know what his problem is.”
“How do you look at someone that makes them think you think they are gay? I don’t understand that, Justin. What was that?”
“To be honest, I think he is gay and is fighting it. I was like that for a while when I realized I was gay. My father told me if I was gay, he would kick me out and disinherited me. It scared me because I was only fourteen. I knew if he kicked me out, I would go into foster care, so I let on like I wasn’t.”
“You think that Carson is gay for sure?”
“Not for sure, but I never said anything about him being gay and I wouldn’t unless he brought it up. I don’t know what his problem is babe.”
“Well, maybe Monday, you can get to it and see what happens. I don’t know why he would be afraid to tell us that if he is. I don’t care if he’s straight or gay.”
“Maybe he has a crush on you, and he feels threatened by me. He knows we see each other, and he thinks I’ll take you away from him.”
“He’s a child Justin. I would never feel that way toward him. I want him for a son, not a boyfriend. I don’t know what to think about that.”
“Babe, I didn’t say you wanted him or be improper with him. In his mind, he may feel that he has a chance with you since you haven’t had a boyfriend all these years he has been here. Maybe he’s just curious or just a boy crush. I don’t know until we get into it.”
“I know you’re not supposed to tell me what goes into the sessions, but please let me know if that’s what he has in his head. I don’t want to show him affection that he thinks is more than it is. I worry about that so much.”
“Babe, I can’t tell you what he says. I can tell you not to give him affection until we are done. That’s the best I can do.”
“Do you mean now or after you find out what’s wrong?”
“Now, if I tell you now, then I’m not betraying his confidence. So, if we get into it and that’s not the problem, then I’ll tell you to give him a hug. How will that work for you? That won’t be betraying his confidence either.”
“Yeah, that’ll work. I don’t want you to get into trouble, but I have to know how my son feels about me. I’m still going through the adoption tomorrow.”
“Maybe that’s what triggered this outburst. He has a crush on you, and you're going to be his father. I don’t recall anything about sexual abuse, do you?”
“No, I don’t remember anything about that either. Just beatings. Not whippings but fist beatings by his father. That’s not to say it didn’t happen, though. I would rather get the truth from him than a report. See if you can get that out of him in therapy, then you can treat that as well.”
“I plan on it. Is dinner about ready? I’m starved. I didn’t stop on the way home and have lunch. I just wanted to get home to you and the boys.”
“I’m just about to take the lasagna out of the oven. The bread is ready, so yeah, we are ready to eat. Do you want to call the boys? Send Steve in, and I’ll send Carson’s food up by him.”
Justin kissed Hunte
r on the temple and went to call the boys down to eat.
Chapter 18
Justin stood at the bottom of the stairs. “Dinner is ready. Steve, your dad, wants you in the kitchen.”
Steve came running down the steps. He had a massive grin on his face. “Thanks Justin. That sounds so good telling me my dad wants me. It’s been a long while since I had a dad.”
“Well, you have a good one now. Michael and Dalton go help Hunter get the food to the dining room. I’ll get the rest of the boys down.” Justin went up the stairs and got the rest of the boys and sent them downstairs.
Carson opened his door. “Justin, can I talk to you about something?”
“Sure, Carson. What do you need?”
“I really am sorry for all the things I said to you. I’m having a hard time right now. I don’t know what to do, but I’m afraid. I have a secret and I don’t know if I can keep it or not. I don’t want to make Hunter mad at me.”
“Do you want to talk about it now? I can sit up here and talk to you if you want me to.”
“No, I don’t want to take you away from Jordan. Maybe we can have a session soon. You can’t tell Hunter what I say in a session, can you?”
“Nope, everything you say to me is just between you and me. That’s what a session is for. If anyone finds out what you told me, it comes out of your mouth not mine. You’re going to start your sessions on Monday after you finish with Hunter in school. Then just come downstairs and we’ll get started.”
“I will thank you, Justin.”
Justin went downstairs and sat down at the table. Hunter was filling plates, and when he got finished with the boys, he made his plate and Justin’s dish. He went over and sat down beside Justin and they said the blessing and ate dinner. It was Michael and Dalton’s turn to clear the table and clean up the kitchen. Justin went downstairs and Hunter took the boys into the living room and started a movie.
Justin pulled out Carson’s folder and opened it. He reread the entire file; he shook his head. He couldn’t see anything in the data that would make him so angry when most of the other boys had a worse time before coming to Hunter. He made some notes and put them in the file. He put the file in his desk drawer and went back upstairs. Hunter looked at him and raised his brow, Justin shook his head slightly and shrugged his shoulders.
Justin picked up Jordan and put a pillow in his lap and then sat Jordan on his lap. They watched the Lion King and then Justin gave Jordan a piggyback ride up to his room and waited while he took his bath then he put antibiotic ointment on his back and butt and put some bandages on him. He helped him into his pajamas and then tucked him in bed. Steve had taken a shower while Justin was putting the ointment and bandages on Jordan, then he went to bed too. Justin kissed both boys on the head and then shut the door when he left.
He went back downstairs and sat down on the couch beside Hunter. “Hey, babe.”
Hunter smiled at him. “Hey, yourself. Did you get Jordan fixed up?”
“Yeah, he and Steve both got bathes and went to bed. They are such good boys.”
“I take it that you didn’t get any new information about Carson from the reports?”
“No, he did come to his door when I went up to get the rest of the boys, and he gave me a good apology. He’s anxious for his sessions to start so I have a lot of hope for him.”
“I sure hope so. I want the boys to live in harmony and not have any conflicts. If we do get married, then they’ll all be brothers, and I want them to get along. Oh, did you fix up Simon?”
“No, I need to. How is his back looking?”
“It looks really good. All the redness is gone. I have tended to it the last couple of nights. I think it’ll be healed up before he goes on Saturday.”
“Then it’ll be sore again for another week. It’ll be pretty, though, and maybe it’ll give Simon enough confidence to be able to talk to girls. Right now, he’s embarrassed at his back and is afraid no girl will want him.”
“If she is like that, he doesn’t need her.”
“I know, but you know how teenage girls and boys are. They come up with the stupidest stuff. Anyway, it’ll give him confidence. That’s what he needs now.”
“I didn’t ask him, but is he happy you're adopting him?”
“Yes, he’s thrilled. He said he had prayed that I would but didn’t think so since Steve told him I was adopting Jordan. He’s taking his role of big brother to Jordan very seriously. I’m glad he is.”
“Simon has always been a good boy. He was my favorite before Steve came to us. My heart went out to Steve, and he became my favorite. That sounds horrible, doesn’t it?”
“No, I think Steve needed you more than Simon did. It doesn’t matter now anyway when we get married, you’ll be a dad to both of them. I like that. Do you think the other boys will feel bad that we adopted those four and not them?”
“Babe, there are sixteen of them. They know we can’t adopt all of them. To be honest, we got the neediest of them all. They all needed a family, so we are giving it to them. I think the other boys will understand that.”
“I hope so. I don’t want them to feel bad because we didn’t adopt them. Babe, I think I’m going to bed as soon as I change the bandages on Simon’s back. It has been a long day for me and a long drive. I’m exhausted. Would you care to join me?”
“Yes, but I’ll go to my room, and you go to yours. I don’t want Steve to have a nightmare and come to my room and find you in bed with me. I don’t want him not to find me, so I can’t be in your room. When we get married, we’ll share a bed.”
Justin smiled. “I know Sweetheart. I was teasing you. I know you don’t want the boys traumatized by us sharing a bed before we’re married. It wouldn’t be a good example for them either.”
Hunter wrapped his arms around Justin’s neck and kissed him. Justin pulled him into his lap and held him close. “I love you, Hunter.”
“I love you too, Justin. We need to talk about somethings, but I want you to get a good night’s rest before we do. I don’t want you falling asleep in the middle of our conversation.”
“Then we better wait until tomorrow. Goodnight, my love.”
“Goodnight, Justin. Sleep well.” They both got up and went upstairs to shower and go to bed.
Justin woke early, he got dressed and went to the kitchen to make coffee. He sat down at the small table in the kitchen, waiting for the coffee. Hunter came down and sat on Justin’s lap and laid his head on Justin’s shoulder. “Good Morning babe. Did you sleep well?”
“No, I’ve been up most of the night with first Steve then Jordan.”
“Why didn’t you come to wake me up to tend to Jordan?”
“I was already up with Steve. He came into my room not long after I went to sleep. He had nightmares, so I put him in bed with me so we could go back to sleep and he woke again screaming. I don’t know why you didn’t hear him. He said his mother and father were taking turns beating him. I comforted him and got him back to sleep, then I heard Jordan scream and cry, so I went to get him and bring in back to my bed too and he was crying so hard he woke Steve. It was just one thing after another last night.”
“Babe, I told you that I would help you if you just let me know.”
“You were so tired last night Justin I didn’t want to bother you. I handled it. I just might have to sneak a nap in today somewhere along the line.”
“Go get into my bed and go to sleep now. I’ll sit on the stairs and listen for our boys. What time do they all have to get up for school and I’ll get them up and take them to school. By then, you should have a good nap in and maybe enough rest.”
“I’m going to take you up on that, Justin. I’m too tired to argue. The boys have to be up at 6:30 and be at school at 8:00. They can show you the way to school. Tell them all to have cereal for breakfast and that way, you don’t have to cook. Wake me when you get home. It’s only 5:00 right now so that will give me three hours. I can get by on that.”
&nb
sp; Justin kissed him on the temple, and Hunter went back up the stairs. Justin poured himself a cup of coffee and walked to the stairs and sat down sipping his coffee. James and Leon were the first to come down at 6:30. James said, “Justin, we got everyone awake except for Steve and Jordan. They weren’t in their beds.”
“Just leave them. They are in Hunter’s bed. They were up all night with nightmares. They need some rest. Hunter just went up and got in my bed so he could get some sleep. He was up all night with them. Hunter said for all of you to just eat cereal for breakfast. I’m not much of a cook, and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to eat anything I could make.”
Leon said, “We are pretty good cooks if you want us to cook, but cereal works for us too.”
“Well, eat the cereal like Hunter said and there won’t be that many dishes.”
They went into the kitchen and started getting bowls down for all the boys that would be going to school. They knew that Steve, Carson, and Jordan wouldn’t get up that early. They were all homeschooled.
Simon came downstairs and sat down beside Justin. “Hey, Dad. How are you this morning?”
“I’m doing fine. How are you this morning?”
“My back isn’t even sore today. I guess it needed your touch last night to make it all better. Are we still going to see Levi on Saturday?”
“Yes, every Saturday until it is finished. Saturday, you’ll start to see some color in the tat. It’ll be amazing. Are you going to show the kids at school when it’s done?”
“I don’t know, Dad. It had taken on a whole new meaning than when it started. I think it’s something that I need to hold back on. I mean I’ll have to let some of them see it when I take a shower at school, but I want it to be between you and me.”
Justin put his arm around Simon and hugged him close. He kissed him on the temple. “Go get your breakfast, son. You’re having cereal this morning. Hunter was up most of the night with Steve and Jordan.”
Simon got a panicked look. “What happened to Jordan, Dad?”
