Until the Gangaway Tears Us Apart

by V. Louro

  * * *

  Denise was happy to have some time on her own before Diego arrived. She knew it would be a while before he left the wardroom and on turnaround day she was grateful for some time to recover a little.

  She had a very long shower, moisturized her hair with a special mask she had purchased in the Spa and spread cream all over her body. She lit on a candle which was absolutely forbidden onboard due to fire hazard. She had bought a few that came inside a metal tin and had a cover so as long as she only lit them when someone was in the cabin she didn’t feel too bad for breaking the rules.

  She put on a tight top and shorts that she used to sleep and opened a book she had brought with her from home. Every contract she used to bring a few and tried to read them all before getting home. Normally she did but today she couldn’t move past the middle of the first page. Her mind kept circling back to Diego.

  It was the first time she had allowed herself to be on a relationship onboard. There had been a few short lasting episodes involving other people but because the timing was never right and neither were the guys she had been involved with, they didn’t go anywhere and she was happy for that. With Diego things had taken a different course.

  At first she thought of him the same way as she thought of a number of other people - lightly. But he had been very persistent. He had paged her and called and invited her out since they had first talked on a trip back to the ship after being ashore for a few hours in Vietnam the week she had joined the ship. She liked the fact that he knew what he wanted and didn’t quit easily. At that time the last thing she wanted was to complicate her life by getting a boyfriend but then she started to enjoy his company. In only a few days they were sleeping together. She had no idea how that had happened so fast.

  She was sure that had they been ashore she would have taken things easier and slower, but onboard everything is fast and intense. She had worked on ships long enough to know that but it wasn’t something she thought about much. After almost two months sharing her life with him she wasn’t sure if it had been a good idea to move so fast. The part of him sleeping with her was nice. She enjoyed having him there. His presence was comforting and soothing but a part of her was afraid of how things were going to end. They hadn’t talked about that since both of them were still going to be onboard for a while.

  Denise was starting to like Diego more than she felt safe with and that concerned her. She had successfully guarded her heart against the pain and deception that she had heard so much about through her years onboard and now she had put her guard down and she wasn’t sure if that had been a good idea.

  Every day she was happy to come back to her cabin and throw herself in Diego’s arms. And God, he knew how to push her buttons, every single one of them. She couldn’t think of any better part of her day than when Diego put his arms around her and drove her to bed. Maybe their relationship had become too concentrated on the physical aspect but so far she hadn’t seen a problem in that.

  What scared her was the idea that if Diego didn’t show up one night she would be miserable and lonely. It was the fact that she had gone from enjoying Diego to needing him that concerned her the most. She hadn’t prepared for that and she wasn’t sure how she would handle the outcome. She didn’t even know what the outcome would be. They had never talked about it either and Denise didn’t see Diego very enthusiastic with the idea of talking. Actually, talking was the last thing he wanted to do with his mouth when they were alone.

  A key on the door interrupted her thoughts. Diego came in with a grin.

  “Hello. How come you didn’t tell me we were having a romantic evening? I would have been here earlier.” His eyes were set on the burning candle on the table.

  Denise closed the book and put it on the shelf near the others. “You know me. I like to be prepared.”

  He played dumb. “Prepared for what exactly?”

  “Maybe I should just wait and see how good your imagination is.” She picked up the book again and pretended to go back to her reading.

  He kneeled by the bed next to her and played with the cord of her shorts. He lifted her top a little and kissed her stomach. “I’m going to have a shower now but when I’m done I’ll be happy to give you a demonstration of how good my imagination is.” He said very softly and moved his lips up to her neck and then to her mouth. “Enjoy the reading.”

  She followed him with her eyes as he closed the bathroom door. There was no way she was going to concentrate on reading.

  2

  At six the next morning Sofia was wide awake. The ship was rocking a lot more than the night before and she took a pill just in case. It made her drowsy, but drowsy was not as bad as seasick.

  Big splashes of water on the portholes reminded her where she was. There was a deep haze over the water and the skies were gunmetal gray. It looked like a great day to be indoors.

  Sofia unpacked before heading for breakfast, using the left side closet for her uniforms and the right side for personal clothing. She put some pictures on the walls with tape, to remind her of the friends and family she wasn’t going to see for a while. Hesitantly, she put up a picture of Kieran as well. He wasn’t family and didn’t exactly fit into the concept of friend, but as much as she hated to admit it she missed him more than anyone else.

  After breakfast she started her job in the medical center, where she had an easy morning attending crew. None of them was seriously sick or badly injured.

  Later she stopped by the crew office to buy phone cards and internet time for her laptop. Denise was by the window with Benjie. Amy and Diego were sitting in the back. Everyone looked a lot more relaxed than the previous day.

  “Ten dollars for 24 megabytes?” Sofia observed in shock when she got the card. “You have to be joking!”

  Denise giggled. “Sorry dear, unfortunately that’s how expensive it is. And most of the times the connection is slow. If you want to look at the good side, be advised that the passengers pay a lot more.”

  “Crap! Can I use the computer in the office instead?”

  “I guess you can, but the company blocks social networks and video streaming. You can only use a private laptop for stuff like that.” Denise explained.

  “I guess I’ll have to pay for these stupid 24 megabyte cards then!” Sofia whined.

  Amy shrugged from her seat and smiled understandingly. New joiners all had the same issues and then they got used to how things worked and stopped complaining.

  “Well, we live with what we have, isn’t it?” Diego observed. “At least the drinks in the crew bar are cheap.”

  His comment made everyone chuckle. Sofia didn’t take long to realize that if logic applies very little in the outside world, it means even less on cruise ships.

  Before she left, Denise invited her for a drink in the wardroom after work, just before dinner. Sofia didn’t like the place because of the smoke, but she didn’t want to miss the chance to make friends and gladly accepted the invitation. It had to be better than the loneliness of her cabin.

  After closing the medical center for lunch she got a small window of opportunity to take a walk on deck 7, expecting to be able see a bit more of the vessel. There were nice Christmas decorations that were officially called holiday decorations so that the passengers who didn’t like Christmas wouldn’t get upset.

  After another induction Sofia took the amidships stairs and stopped by the entrance of the atrium, known as the Piazza on deck 5. The Piazza went from deck 5 to deck 7 and it was a wide beautiful area, luxuriously decorated. As she faced the atrium, there was one dining room on the left and the Internet Café to the right, where a lot of passengers were catching up with their emails. Right in front of her there were two panoramic elevators and between them a white piano. Just in front of the piano she saw a circular area which marked the exact middle of the ship. There were comfortable chairs and small tables displayed around the tilled floor and waiters served coffees and cookies to the passengers.

  T
he lobby bar was on the port side and no wonder passengers loved to sit by the big windows having a coffee, chatting or reading a book while the waves raced right outside the big windows.

  She made half a turn and admired the two beautiful spiral staircases with marble steps. On the top, hanging from the ceiling, a beautiful round big lamp made of stained glass completed a portrait of beauty and elegance. She could see why people enjoying cruising so much. The ship was amazing, even with all the rocking.

  That afternoon in the medical center Keira walked in complaining about the smell of vomit.

  “Days like this I hate my job.” She said. “Can you imagine what it is to belong to the hit squad?”

  “The hit squad? That’s the group of guys who clean vomit all over the ship, right?” Sofia asked.

  “Yes. Can you imagine doing that for a living?” Keira muttered throwing her blue rubber gloves into the metal bin.

  “Someone has to do it.”

  “Some lives suck more than others!” Keira replied theatrically.

  “That’s deep.”

  “Talking about deep, tomorrow I’m going on a tour to the Delta of the Mekong. That will make me deeply happy.”

  Starting to be interested, Sofia dropped her notepad on the table and looked at the nurse with interest. “Really? How did you work that out? Can I go?”

  “I don’t think you can get on this one anymore. It’s sold out. In the future, get the brochures from the tour office in the beginning of the cruise and ask to go as an escort on the tours you fancy. As long as they have availability I’m sure you’ll get a ticket. I’ll introduce you to the tour office manager, Natalie. She’s just joined the ship and lucky for us she’s wonderful.”

  “That’s cool. Do we have to pay?”

  “Normally they give us the tickets for free. There are very few exceptions. I only had to pay for one helicopter tour in Alaska so far. In the end you fill a report, kind of like an evaluation of the tour so they know how it went, if the level is the expected, how the guide performed and so on.” Keira clarified.

  “Well, that makes it up for the stupid internet prices.”

  “Yes. Internet costs a fortune, but drinking and smoking is cheap. Welcome onboard!”

  “I’ve noticed. Any other strange things I should know?”

  “Heaps of them, but I don’t want you to miss the fun of finding out by yourself. It’s part of ship’s training.” Keira left with a foolish smile and a very pale lady sat on the chair and started telling the doctor how surprised she was with the fact that a ship so big could rock so much and that if she had known she wouldn’t book the cruise and how horrible the Captain was because he wouldn’t slow down the ship.

  Sofia bit her tongue to avoid laughing, prescribed her Dramamine and sent her to her cabin to have a rest. She was sure the moment they arrived ashore she wouldn’t remember her complaints anymore.

  Before dinner, Sofia entered the wardie just on time to get the last available seat next to Denise. There were a few other faces she remembered from the day before, but most of them were completely unknown or at best difficult to remember. People in uniforms all looked the same to her. Diego was in the same location of the previous day, playing darts with his friends. Denise and Amy interrupted their conversation about crew lists and landing orders to welcome the doctor.

  “So, you’re from Switzerland. I studied there.” Sofia told her new friend after reading her nationality in the name badge.

  “Is that so?”

  “I was born in Portugal and lived there until I was 16. My parents got a nasty divorce and my mom wanted me away from dad’s influence so she used the quality of the Swiss schools as an excuse to get me out of there while they fought mostly over money but also for me and my brother. After Switzerland I moved to England where my mother remarried and I went to college in Cambridge. When I completed the internship it felt like a good time for a change so I took a job in a hospital in Dublin. That was my last home before I came here.” Sofia explained avoiding getting into much detail.

  Amy looked at her with wonder and though about herself years before when she worked in six different countries in 3 years teaching English and living out of a suitcase.

  Sofia ordered a beer to keep her stomach busy for a little longer. Amy left after being paged by her husband, who was on watch on the bridge, and suddenly half the people disappeared leaving the place almost empty.

  “Dinner time.” Denise confirmed, guessing her thoughts.

  “Should we go for dinner too?” Sofia asked, feeling a bit hungry.

  “Let’s just wait a bit for the boys. Diego and Ian are going to get attached to that stupid board one of these days.”

  “What’s the story with the two of you?” Sofia asked curious to know how onboard relationships worked.

  “We’ve been together for just over a month and so far so good but I’m a bit apprehensive. Ship’s relationships normally only last until someone goes home and I’ve been telling myself that I can handle that but I’m not so sure anymore.”

  Sofia took a sip of the beer. “Are you in love with him?”

  “I’m still trying to figure that out. After this few weeks we’ve been together I don’t know what to call it yet, but it’s not just an attraction anymore and that’s scaring me.”

  Sofia chuckled. “Does he feel the same way about you?”

  “I have no idea and I don’t want to ask. I’m just letting it go for the moment. When I don’t know what to do I wait and maybe a light will turn on somewhere in my brain although I’m almost sure all the bulbs are broken at the moment.” Denise explained in a rather comical way.

  A lot of people arrived in khaki uniforms and suddenly the wardroom felt very small again. Sofia was introduced to a few officers, whose names she would never remember without the precious help of the name tags. It started to feel almost normal to be there and a couple of invitations for drinks in the crew bar and corridor parties came up from different people.

  Her thoughts flew to Ireland and returned almost immediately. Kieran was not here, and that was a good thing. She had to keep in mind to have a good time onboard. That had been the point of joining the ship.

  Just when they decided to stand up, Diego lost the game making the scores even and demanded another game to find a winner. Denise looked at him annoyed and he ignored her. The girls sat down again waiting patiently.

  “If he comes up with one more game I swear I’m going for dinner without him.” Denise protested.

  “Boys and their toys!” Sofia nodded. “Listen, I’ve wanted to ask but yesterday I forgot. Where can I buy some bottles of water? The one from the tap tastes like bleach.”

  “I’ll give you a couple but in two days there’s a cambusa and you can order a few boxes.”

  “What in the world is a cambusa?” Sofia asked, pretty sure she had never heard that word before.

  “It’s a beverage sale. They do it for the crew once a cruise. You can order water, sodas and alcoholic drinks. Just write one of the checks the steward leaves in your cabin, put your account number so they can charge you and leave it on your desk. Your steward will pick them up from the storage area and leave them in your cabin afterward.”

  “I suppose that’s another officer thing, right?”

  “Everyone can go to cambusa, but only the officers get stewards to bring the orders to their cabins. The others either queue to get their drinks or they have to pay someone to do it for them.”

  Sofia added that information to her now long list of important stuff and felt sorry for the crew members who didn’t get the same perks that she did. Wouldn’t it be a sight to live in a world where everyone was treated the same?

  3

  They were docked in Vietnam. Sofia had five hours to do whatever she liked but she didn’t have a clue where to go. Ho Chi Min City was three hours away by bus so that one was out of the question. Denise and Mary were working, Keira was on her tour and Carla was still in the pr
ocess of recovering from last night’s party. Being new onboard, the list of friends was not that wide yet, so the options for company were very limited.

  The best thing, according to the gangway staff, was to take the shuttle bus to Vung Tau, the nearest town. The trip took almost one hour through a depressing yet somehow beautiful landscape that showed the clear signs of devastation caused by a hurricane just a few months earlier. The country was undoubtedly very poor and had never recovered completely from the war. Most houses Sofia saw were not much better than huts and the lack of cables hanging from poles suggested electricity hadn’t found its way to many of the villages.

  The cars circulating on the narrow road were also very old and falling apart. Most people didn’t seem to be able to afford a car so they drove noisy little scooters instead. Looking out the dirty window of the oldest bus she had ever been in, Sofia concluded it would be a beautiful country if they had the means to keep it. According to the driver they were happy enough when the means allowed them to put food on the table and send their children to school.

  Just as they approached Vung Tau, Sofia saw an old machine gun on a tripod decorating the top of a small blue house: a memory from times that no one wanted to remember and still no one could really forget.

  The landscape of deserted land splashed by an old tree here and there gave turn to a few houses and then to many more until they arrived in the urban area. The bus slowed down in what looked like the main street and then took a turn into the front yard of a local hotel. The driver with a very thick accent instructed everyone about the returning times and as the crowd stepped past the hotel gates they were immediately approached by local vendors eager to sell their hats, robes and other souvenirs for whatever dollars they could get.

  Sofia bought a silky robe with a dragon embroidered on the back and a straw hat like the ones the locals used. She put the hat on her head trying to make it a warning that she already had her shopping done but the gesture had the opposite effect and suddenly a group gathered around her looking to sell more stuff. It took her a few minutes to make them to lose interest and move to the next person.

  Sofia had been in a couple of Asian countries before and the chaotic traffic was nothing new, but it was always impressive to see the hundreds of scooters going in every possible direction with no respect for rules or logic and still, they always managed to stop before hitting each other. She took some pictures and another group gathered around her, this time to pose for the camera. She walked up and down the road only to get to the conclusion that there was very little to do in Vung Tau. She found the beach but the tide was so low that many small boats were left on land.

  According to her port guide, Vung Tau used to be the beach destination for the rich and famous in Saigon, but it didn’t look much like it anymore. A short walk took her to a few temples and pagodas, not particularly impressive for someone who had been to Nepal not that long ago.

  Near the hotel where the bus stopped there was a funky looking restaurant with orange walls, the shape of a mushroom and a nice yard covered by trees that provided a cool shade. She found a lot of crew-alike people having drinks there. Sofia sat on her own by one of the tables and bought a can of diet coke. In less than two minutes a tall blond man in his early thirties, wearing stylish Ray-Ban glasses a white t-shirt and jeans made himself invited and joined her. She remembered seeing him somewhere but people without uniforms and name tags were hard to identify and she couldn’t figure out where she knew him from.

  “Hi doc. How are you? Remember me? Aaron, computer officer from Australia.”

  She was glad he said that before she had to ask. “Hi. You were playing darts with Diego last night weren’t you?” She remembered suddenly.

  “Yes. I kicked his ass after you left! He wants revenge tonight.” Aaron answered proudly, flashing his beautiful perfectly lined white teeth and Sofia laughed out loud thinking that men never really grow up.

  “First time on ships?” He asked.

  “Is that very obvious?”

  “Just a little. Don’t worry, you’ll feel at home in no time. As soon as we get to Sydney if you want I can give you a tour. It’s my hometown.” He offered.

  “Nice. I’ll remember that. You must be excited to go home.” She said, trying to come up with some pep talk. Silence bothered her.

  He nodded. “Yes. My family and friends want to see the ship more than they want to see me, but it will be cool to be there again.”

  More people arrived and before she knew it, Sofia was making friends with three waiters from the Philippines, a Canadian photographer, or photog like they called him, a Chilean production assistant, a couple of Romanian bartenders and a Bulgarian engineer.

  “How many nationalities work onboard?” She was puzzled with the diversity.

  “About fifty different nationalities. We have 1100 crew members from all over the world.” Aaron replied.

  “Wow, that’s amazing. And they all get along?”

  “They have to. If there are fights the reward is a flight home the next port. No job, no money. We live in each other’s pockets but there is a boundary everyone has to respect.”

  Sofia smiled in amazement. “Someone should teach that lesson to the political leaders in this world.”

  “Political leaders have access to guns, ma’. We don’t!” One of the waiters replied.

  The conversation ran smoothly and in a short period of time she learned that one of the Filipino waiters was unhappy because his roommate snored like a truck going uphill, the Canadian photographer used foul language like a child uses sugar in cereal and the Bulgarian engineer was very tired because he had been working twelve hour cycles and only slept four hours at a time, which messed up his body to the point he never knew if it was day or night. Another waiter added that his back was not in good condition because his child size bed was not big enough for him and he couldn’t even sit on it because his head would hit the board of the above bunk bed.

  “Come on people. Stop complaining. Sofia might get the wrong impression about life at sea.” Aaron requested courteously.

  “Wait, I still haven’t told her that my roommate’s socks smell like dead animals.” Someone added and everyone giggled.

  The time with the other crew had been the best part of her day and Sofia was glad for her little trip ashore. When they returned she realized there were a number of local vendors selling souvenirs and pirated movies right by the ship. They really didn’t miss a chance to do business, she thought as she observed the number of people, crew and passengers alike, browsing through the vendor’s tables.