But that brought another burden he had never thought he would have to handle. How was he going to do it?
Oh, Nada, I'll always love you!
But as he pondered it, the answer fell into place. He knew it was right.
Satisfied, he fell asleep.
In the morning he woke and kissed Electra, but she was strangely subdued. Maybe all their pillow fighting had worn her out. He considered telling her what he had in mind to do, but feared she would object, so he didn't. She would learn soon enough, anyway.
They dressed. Dolph had only his good suit, so he got into that. Electra got into her marvelous panties and bra, then into her dull everyday clothing, leaving the wedding dress hanging in the closet. It was true she had no further need of that, though he was sorry not to see her in it again. But even in her ordinary clothing she was a wonderful girl. It had taken him six years to realize that, but he would never forget it.
Electra helped get his buttons in order, and she combed his hair and dusted off his shoes. "You're quite handsome, Dolph," she said sadly.
What was wrong? " 'Lectra, I—"
She forced a smile. "It's all right, Dolph. I know what to do."
He concluded that he did not understand women. "We'd better get breakfast, then."
They went out to the main pavilion. There were assorted fruits and pastries that someone had obligingly set out. Dolph picked up an eclair.
Electra walked to another table, where the two vials of potion had been put. She picked up the null potion.
" 'Lectra, wait!" he cried. But he was too late. She drank the vial in one gulp.
He went to her. " 'Lectra, I didn't mean for you to—"
"It's all right, Dolph," she said. "My love would only get in your way at this point."
"But—"
"If you don't mind, I think I'll sit down. I think I have a headache."
"Well, of course, then. But—"
She was already walking away. Baffled, he chewed on his éclair. Each time he took a bite, it made a little "Eeeek!" because that was its nature.
The demoness Metria appeared. "Well, Prince, how are you feeling?" she asked.
He gazed after Electra. "Sort of confused," he confessed.
"Really? Now you've had your one night stand, you've had your fun, and it's time to run. Time to dump Electra, who still loves you, and go for the one who doesn't love you. Why should you be confused?"
"But she just drank the null-love potion!" he exclaimed. "I would've stopped her, if I'd realized, but—"
"Why should she wait?" the demoness inquired. "The longer she went on loving you, the more she hurt. Now she's cleared the way for you, just as she promised, fool that she is."
"Your teasing won't work, Metria. I made my decision last night."
"Yes, I heard, when I snooped on your oval. So did she."
"Snooped on my what?"
"Your circle, loop, omission—"
"You mean those three dots?"
"Right. Your ellipsis. But here's something that should really delight you, Dolph. You know that potion she drank?"
"Yes. I didn't want her to—"
"It didn't work. At least not the way she thought it would."
"But the Good Magician's potions are guaranteed!"
"Oh, it abolished the love spell on her," Metria said. "But that's immaterial."
"Why?"
"Because her magic love faded out years ago. It was replaced by natural love. So the potion had no effect. She still loves you, dope."
"But why didn't she tell me that?"
"I presume because she wants you to be happy and doesn't want to spoil it for you. It's a kind of generosity no demon would indulge in, but human beings aren't up to our standard."
"That's great!" he exclaimed.
"I thought we demons were callous. You have real potential, Prince."
Dolph ignored her, for he spied Naldo and Nada slithering toward the pavilion from the beach. With them was another person, a human woman of middle age, in a full-length white robe. Her dark hair was neatly pinned back, and her nose was straight. He had never seen her before.
"Prince Dolph," Naldo said. "Please meet Clio, the Muse of History, who has come to record the details of this unusual event."
The Muse of History! "But the Muses stay on Mount Parnassus!" Dolph said.
"Normally we do, Prince Dolph," Clio said. "But this is an extraordinary situation, so I came to make sure I had it right." She entered the pavilion and took one of the empty seats, writing busily on her notepad.
"Uh, sure," Dolph said, disgruntled. He hadn't realized that this would be an occasion warranting recording in a history tome! The Muse had not attended the wedding yesterday, after all. How could this be more important than that?
"I suppose we had better get on with this," Naldo said. "Most of the others have chosen not to attend, but the centaur family will be here, and my father, King Nabob, to handle the formalities." He and Nada went to the changing rooms, where they evidently had sets of clothes stored. Soon they emerged in human form. Naldo glanced back the way they had come. "Ah, yes, there they are now."
Dolph looked. In the sky were two centaurs flying side by side, somehow supporting a third between them. As they came in for their landing in the sand he saw how they did it: a girl riding each big one was holding a hand of the little one, Che. They sent up a waft of sand as they touched; then the centaurs folded their wings, the girls jumped off, and all five of them and a small orange cat came in. All of them were wearing big spectacles, apparently enjoying some family joke.
Dolph turned—and there behind him was King Nabob. "Do it," he said.
Dolph realized that the stage was his. "Um, 'Lectra," he called.
Electra got up and came to him. "Of course, Dolph," she said. She brought out a small handkerchief and used it to wipe his face; he had a bit of eclair on it. "May I kiss you one last time?"
"No," he told her gently.
"Beautiful!" Metria murmured.
Electra turned away. She wanted him to be happy, so she was not making any scene. She was dutifully giving him up because she loved him. So many aspects of her were coming into focus now that he should have seen long ago!
Nada was not in a wedding dress, but it didn't matter; she was beautiful in ordinary clothing. She took a step toward the table where the vial of love elixir was.
"Please, no," Dolph told her. "I—I have something to say, and I hope you will understand."
"Of course, Dolph," she said, exactly as Electra had.
He took a breath, nerved himself, and spoke, as he had rehearsed it to himself in the night. "Oh, Nada, I'll always love you. But I can't marry you."
Electra's face turned to him, expressionless.
Nada blinked. "What?"
"Oh, for censored's sake!" the demoness snapped, fading out in a cloud of deep disgust.
Dolph gulped. "I—I am breaking our betrothal, Nada. Because the fault is mine, the forfeit is mine. The alliance between my folk and yours must be honored as it has been. You may—may marry whom you choose. I hope always to be your friend, and the friend of your folk. And—but—may I kiss you one last time?"
Nada was recovering her wits, which had scattered somewhat. "Not till you tell me why," she said as she caught the last one.
"Because I won't divorce 'Lectra. I—I know her better, now, and she loves me, and she's doing everything she can to make me happy no matter how it hurts her, and she's really more my type—I mean, she likes pillow fights and things, and she's closer to my age, and you—I guess I thought no one else could have what you have, but 'Lectra does, and freckles too, and I can drink that vial of love potion and look at her, and it's just better this way."
"So you're dumping me," Nada said.
Dolph scuffled his feet. "Yes."
"So that's the meaning of the Answer!" King Nabob said. "The Good Magician Humfrey told us to 'Marry what Draco brings'—and Draco brought Dolph, and yesterday I married Dolp
h to Electra!"
"I'll kiss to that," Nada said. She took hold of Dolph and gave him a kiss that reminded him of the past night. Oh yes, he loved her—but not quite the same way as he had before. He had learned some things, and matured, and he knew what he had to do.
When she let him go, Dolph turned and took a step toward the table with the vial. Then he paused, turning to Electra. "No, I don't think I'll need it. 'Lectra, you can't kiss me one last time because there isn't going to be any last time. Not for as long as I can imagine. But if now you want to get on with one of the middle times, or if you want to be mad at me for being so stupid about you—"
"I do!" she exclaimed, and stepped into him. Her face was tear-streaked, but her electricity tingled the way it had during the night, and her kiss practically sent him floating. "I love you as you are, stupid," she whispered tenderly.
"I—I guess that's it, then," Dolph said when his head steadied somewhat. "I, we—I don't know what we'll do, except to stay married. Thank all of you for being here."
"You're welcome, stupid," King Nabob said gruffly, and slithered away, seeming quite satisfied.
Dolph looked around the pavilion, dazed by the neatness of the resolution. But when he saw Clio talking to Jenny Elf, he realized that of course it had worked out, because the Muse of History had been here to ensure that it was correctly plotted. Magician Murphy's curse on Che's abduction could have messed up other aspects of Xanth history, so it had required personal intervention to get it all straight again.
"Clio is explaining to Jenny about Muses, I suspect," Chex remarked. "The elf has been telling stories, and her details have not been completely accurate. Also, she is from another land, and perhaps has not before been written into the books of the Muses. I can appreciate why Clio decided to give this matter her personal attention."
So it hadn't been because of Dolph's undivorce! He was glad of that.
"Nada and I will return to Mount Etamin," Naldo said. "But we shall certainly be in touch." Somehow Dolph had the impression that the naga prince wasn't much surprised by this outcome. Maybe he had a notion what it was like spending a wedding night with a woman. He had been the one to suggest this marriage and divorce, and he had wanted to spare his sister grief; it seemed he had found a way. If so, Dolph was grateful, because it had led to his discovery of Electra. It wasn't that Nada was in any way diminished in his eye or heart, but that he did after all have an alternative that he knew would keep him happy.
"Wait a bit, Naldo," Cheiron Centaur said. He did not seem surprised either. Perhaps none of the menfolk at the wedding were surprised. "We would like you to foal-sit our family this afternoon."
Nada was surprised. "You mean Che and Gwenny and Jenny?"
"And Sammy," Che said. "The spectacles spectacle."
"But why?"
"Because we have to take Prince Dolph and Princess Electra to the far side of the moon," Cheiron explained.
"What?" Electra asked.
"Your honeymoon," Chex clarified. "It's traditional."
"I mean—you called me—I'm no—"
"You married the Prince," Naldo said. "You are the first princess in memory to wear blue jeans."
"That's right!" Dolph agreed, realizing. "And when I'm king, you'll be queen."
Electra began to wobble. Naldo caught her and supported her before she fell. "Princesses swoon rather easily," he said. "Especially when they are new. You will have to stay very close to her and keep an eye on her for the next few days, Prince Dolph."
"For the next few weeks," Nada said. "But princesses mend readily with affection."
"Months," Chex said. "Perhaps years." Her voice was authoritative, in the adult manner, but somehow Dolph no longer found that annoying. He would do his best.
Dolph felt a bit dizzy himself. Before he knew it, he was on Cheiron's back, and Electra was on Chex's back, and they became light indeed as the tails of the centaurs flicked them. Then they were in the air, rising above the beach and pavilion, headed for the moon, wherever it might be at this hour of the day.
Dolph looked down. The children were already running to the water's edge to build sand castles around the cat, who did not deign to move out of the way. Except for Jenny Elf. She was standing by herself, looking somewhere. Dolph knew it was toward her home, the World of Two Moons. He knew how she felt, losing one thing she loved while finding happiness with another. Her story was not yet done, he suspected. But he knew that the Muses were on top of the situation now, so they would see her story through, as they had seen his own through.
"Look!" Electra cried, pointing down.
Dolph looked where she pointed. Beyond the central ridge of the Isle of View were two unicorns, a male and a female, walking toward the place where Jenny Elf stood.
"Why, I believe I know of those unicorns!" Chex exclaimed. "They were in a dream we made!"
"Che spoke of a dream he had with Jenny," Cheiron said. "Do you suppose—?"
"With that talent of hers, it could be," Chex agreed.
"Look, Clio is finishing the chapter!" Electra said, looking to where the Muse was putting away her notepad.
"She's finishing the whole volume," Cheiron said. "I'm afraid this honeymoon isn't going to be recorded."
Dolph looked across at Electra, who smiled. The Muse of History was not putting their next week's activity into her book? It was just as well. They were now, after all, part of the dread Adult Conspiracy.
History of Xanth (simplified) by E. Timber Bram
-4000 Presumed arrival of the Demon X(A/N) 1 , plus or minus ten thousand years or multiple thereof, causing magic to slowly infuse the region from the trace leakage of his essence.
-2200 Around this time, a colony of human folk arrives from Mundania. It grows for a while until Magicians and Sorceresses manifest. One of the early Sorceresses is the Sea Hag, mostly unknown to others because of her frequent change of bodies. She survives until 1077, when she is banished to Brain Coral storage. The Hag apparently forgot her history, remembering only that she is thousands of years old.
-2100 About this time, Xanth is cut off from Mundania, becoming a true island.
-1900 The human colony fails, with the humans becoming assorted magic species through interbreeding or change by magic. Harpies, merfolk, naga, sphinxes, ogres, goblins, elves, fauns, nymphs, fairies, and other crossbreeds and variants may derive from this; they tend to be closemouthed about it, evidently preferring not to admit the debasement of their lineage by human stock. Thus this colony is unknown to history, except by the mute evidence of the surviving species.
-1000 The isthmus is restored and limited contact with Mundania is resumed.
-800 Centaur species begins around this time.
-85 Prince Harold Harpy delivered.
-73 Prince Harold Harpy exiled to Brain Coral storage.
0 First Wave of human colonization arrives in Xanth, establishing current permanent settlement.
[1] Civilized voles leave their main camp near the Gap Chasm.
35 Second Wave occurs, killing men and children of First Wave.
200 Third Wave occurs several generations later.
202 Magician Roogna delivered to Third Waver.
204 Fourth Wave occurs. Women surviving the Third Wave kill their rapist husbands and bring in better men.
216 The Princess is delivered to the King preceding Roogna.
219 Millie the Maid delivered in West Stockade.
224/225 Electra delivered to West Stockade.
228 Roogna crowns himself king.
233 Electra goes to the Isle of View to help the Sorceress Tapis by making the Heaven Cent.
236 The Princess goes to Tapis to have a coverlet made for her.
* Altercation between Magician Murphy and Sorceress lapis at the Isle of View. Murphy's curse causes Electra to bite the apple and start the 1,000 year sleep scheduled for the Princess.
* Fifth Wave advance scouts enter Xanth.
* Dor's adventure in Fourth Wave Xan
th, wherein he detonates the Forget Spell in the Gap Chasm.
* The great Goblin/Harpy War occurs.
* Prince Harold Harpy released from Brain Coral storage, and the spell on goblin females is revoked.
* Topological transformation of Millie the Maid into a book titled The Skeleton in the Closet. Neo-Sorceress Vadne exiled to Brain Coral storage. The Zombie Master zombies himself.
* Tapis and the Princess go to Castle Roogna, and the Princess marries King Roogna.
237 Magician Murphy retires to Brain Coral storage.
* Fifth Wave proper begins.
286 King Roogna dies in battle with the Sixth Wave.
367 Zombie Jonathan encounters a phantom at Specter Lake.
378 Seventh Wave.
591 Stork brings Magician Gromden.
623 Magician Gromden assumes the throne.
657 Stork brings Magician Yin-Yang.
658 Stork brings Threnody as the result of the mischief of a demoness with King Gromden.
659 Stork brings Jordan the Barbarian to Fen Village.
677 Jordan commences his adventure in medieval Xanth.
* Jordan has a tryst with Bluebell Elf.
* King Gromden dies; Castle Roogna deserted.
* Magician Yang assumes the throne.
* Jordan becomes a ghost.
* Threnody marries King Yang.
681 Threnody becomes a ghost.
682 King Yang remarries.
684 Stork brings Lord Bliss, son of Yang.
689 Stork holds nose and brings Evil Magician Muerte A. Fid.
698 Eighth Wave.
704 Lord Bliss marries Lady Ashley Rose.
705 Stork brings Rose of Roogna to Lord Bliss and Lady Rose. 719 King Yang assassinated by poisoning.
* Muerte A. Fid, Magician of Alchemy, assumes the throne. 721 Lord Bliss receives poison-pen letter.
725 Lord Bliss dies. Rose sent to Castle Roogna for safety.
753 Ninth Wave.
797 Tenth Wave.
866 Eleventh Wave.
883 Stork brings Magician Ebnez.
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