“It’s okay, Lara. It’s me.” Archer repeated reassuringly. He was fighting the urge to move closer to her, to touch her again and make the nightmares disappear.
Lara’s eyes widened, she sighed and released her grip on the sheets she had been holding up to her chest, letting them fall loosely to her lap before wringing her hands nervously.
“Lara?” Archer whispered softly, he started to reach out but hesitated, he didn’t want to scare her.
“I…I really killed him, didn’t I?” Her voice shook, her bottom lip started quivering and Archer couldn’t hold back any longer, the urge to comfort her was too strong. He moved to the bed faster than humanly possible, sitting next to her, he pulled her gently to his chest before wrapping his arms around her back. He felt her rest her head on his shoulder for a moment before she began shaking. The sound of sobs reached his ears as her arms slowly wrapped around his waist, resting her hands against his bare back.
As they held each other, Lara’s sobs became sniffles and she slowly relaxed. I have to tell her I’m the son of the man she killed. I have to explain that the man was a monster and deserved to die, that she avenged her parent’s death and saved my life by killing him and she should feel no guilt for that. If I tell her now though…it will just reopen that wound for her and make her relive the nightmare over again. He should have explained everything when they last spoke, but he was a coward. Telling her about the man she killed would mean having to admit being his son and he wasn’t ready for that. He never wanted to be connected to that monster ever again, and once he told her who he was, she would look at him differently and he couldn’t live with that. It was then that Archer realised, he wanted to be her mate. Whether they were fated mates or not, it didn’t matter to him anymore, he wanted this woman. The brave, beautiful woman who was currently drying her eyes in front of him, unashamed at showing emotion, the same woman who had killed for him and saved his life. This was the woman he chose. He just hoped that she would choose him back after she found out who he was and right now, he wasn’t ready to lose her.
“Are you okay?” Archer said softly. Lara was sitting back now as she finished wiping the tears away from her eyes.
“I…I’ll be okay” She said shakily.
“I’ll always be here for you Lara, you can trust me” He reached his hand out and placed it on top of hers as they rested in her lap. Lara smiled at him before dropping her gaze back to her hands.
After a few moments of silence, Lara opened her mouth to speak but then closed it again.
“If there’s anything you need, just let me know, okay?” Archer reassured her
“Would you mind, uh, sleeping in here for the rest of the night?... I…I guess I could use the company”. She didn’t lift her eyes from her hands as she took a deep breath before continuing “I mean, only if you’re okay with that. I’m sure I’ll be fine on my own if you’d prefer to sleep in your room though” Lara rushed out.
He couldn’t help himself, he lifted the corner of his mouth into a smile and reached his hand out to curl his fingers under her chin, lifting it so that she could face him.
“Hey, I meant it when I said if there was anything you need, just ask. Let me go grab a few things and I’ll come back in”. Archer squeezed her hand for a split second before releasing it and walked out of the room. He grabbed a pillow and a blanket from the linen cupboard and made his way back to Lara.
When he walked back into Lara’s room, she was in bed, curled up on her side. She had covered herself with the blankets and she looked to be asleep from what he could see. He tried to be quiet as he walked to the end of the bed and placed the pillow on the floor, lying down, he pulled the blanket on top of him. It wouldn’t be a comfortable sleep, but he would sleep like this every night if it meant Lara felt safe and besides it was still better than being back at the shifter prison.
“Archer?” Lara’s soft voice echoed through the room.
“Hmmm?” Archer replied from the makeshift bed on the floor.
Archer could hear Lara’s voice closer now, it sounded like she was sitting up in the bed. “I don’t want you to sleep on the floor, this bed is big enough for the two of us. You deserve to be comfortable after what you’ve been through, what we’ve all been through. Come to bed… Please” Lara’s voice tapered off to a whisper at the last word.
Archer sat up “I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. Honestly, I don’t mind sleeping on the-“
“Please” Lara interrupted, pleadingly
He stood up and made his way to the bed “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure” Lara replied. He watched as Lara pulled down the covers and pat the empty side of the bed, nearest to where he was standing.
“I promise to stick to my side of the bed and all” Archer was trying to lighten the mood after the seriousness of the situation. Lara was scared and he was only sharing a bed to keep her company, not to feel her body up against his all night. Archer swallowed hard, he could feel his heart racing at the thought of sharing a bed with Lara, just being so close to her was starting to make his briefs tent out with his growing erection. He quickly climbed into bed, hoping she didn’t catch a glimpse of his predicament. He needed to get this under control if he was going to sleep next to her all night.
He covered his chest with the blanket, rolled over to his side and faced Lara’s back as she laid down again. After a few moments, she began shuffling back until her back was against his bare chest. He swallowed hard. If he had a problem controlling his excitement before, this certainly wasn’t going to help.
Archer’s heart was racing as he felt her warmth through the black t-shirt she was wearing. Her legs brushed against his as she settled into position and reaching behind her, she grabbed Archer’s arm and wrapped it around her waist to rest on her stomach. He froze in shock at the intimacy of the moment, he’d never experienced anything like this before. Being so close to her like this was torture, he wanted her so badly, but he wasn’t entirely sure how she felt about him.
After a few moments, he let out the breath he’d been holding and began to relax into the position as the sound of Lara’s soft breathing slowed down and she fell asleep. He let himself relax completely before closing his eyes and drifting off.
Chapter 21
A single ray of sunlight was beaming in through the window and directly into Lara’s eye. Lara sleepily swung her hand in front of her face as if she could flick it away but to no avail.
She squinted a few times before opening her eyes to the morning light of the day. It always took Lara a long time to wake up, she hated mornings with a passion and would usually turn her alarm clock off at least three times before getting up for the day, but as she laid there taking in her surroundings, she suddenly remembered where she was and why her alarm clock hadn’t gone off.
Lara woke up enough to notice Archer’s arm was still around her waist where she had pulled it across herself the night before, she winced at the memory of it. She wasn’t usually so brazen but the comfort of being so close to him had allowed her to fall asleep almost instantly. She took a moment to enjoy the feel of his body, entangled in hers. He had agreed to share a bed because she said she could use the company, but she couldn’t deny that she was secretly relishing in the way his arm was wrapped tightly around her waist, gripping the material of her t-shirt as if he couldn’t let her go. The warmth of his still bare chest against her back, the feel of his legs reaching out for hers between the sheets, the feel of his….Wait. Is that? Lara felt something hard against her backside, hard and long. She shuffled forward a bit, trying to avoid yet another awkward situation that would most definitely end up with either one of them, or both being horrendously embarrassed. To Lara’s surprise, Archer’s hand gripped her t-shirt even tighter and shuffled forward to follow her, except this time, as he came forward, he ground into her with his raging hard on. Lara froze. A part of her wanted to roll over and find out just how much of a hard on he really had and find out if she wa
s the reason.
No. You’ll be leaving here in a few hours and just because he’s been sweet, and gentle, and kind, and…and…is currently grinding into you with a pounding boner, does not make it okay to fall for him even more. It’ll only make the pain worse when you leave. Lara closed her eyes tightly and shook her head to rid herself of the unhelpful thoughts, but the motion must have woken him up since she suddenly felt him jerk awake behind her.
“Oh my God. Oh…Fuck. I am so sorry…Shit. I’m sorry” Lara felt movement behind her in bed before Archer’s voice continued “Uh, about that…um… it happens sometimes….in the mornings… I didn’t mean to…Shit!” Archer sounded mortified as Lara rolled over to see his broad back, sitting on the side of the bed, running his hands through his hair. Turns out I’m not the only one with a talent for awkwardness she smiled to herself. He stood and turned in the direction of the bathroom, Lara’s eyes widened as she saw he was attempting to cover an impressive erection with one hand only to fail miserably due to his substantial size. He tried again with both hands and rushed to the bathroom.
Lara swallowed hard as Archer came out of the bathroom. His black hair was effortlessly ruffled as if he’d been running his hands through it and his manicured scruff of a beard made him look like he’d stepped out of a magazine. He was still wearing the same black briefs from the night before and Lara never thought of herself as a leg woman but seeing his bare legs properly for the first time, made her heart beat faster. The pure muscle on his thighs and calves were just as toned as the rest of his body. As he took a step forward, Lara couldn’t help but rake her gaze down his body, she noticed his…problem from before, now fixed as she moved her gaze back up to meet his eyes, hoping he didn’t just notice what she had been looking at.
Archer started walking towards her, like he wanted to go to her, but he hesitated and stopped briefly before he moved to the direction of the hallway. When he reached the door, he turned back to her “I…uh…I’m going to go downstairs and make some breakfast. Take all the time you need” He said and quickly closed the door behind him.
Lara laid her head back on the pillow and smiled to herself. She liked Archer, really liked him. She could feel herself falling for him a little bit more with each encounter. How could she not? He slept next to her after she had a nightmare, he comforted her when she needed comforting, he made her feel beautiful when she was standing in a towel with no makeup and wet hair. He even broke out of the facility and got her to safety, just like he promised. He was everything she would have wanted in a man but nothing she needed. After everything she’d been through recently, she needed someone safe and that smoking-hot-playboy-fighter was most definitely not a safe option. He was probably used to waking up with women in his bed, used to thinking for himself and fighting at the club each night, not caring if there was someone at home waiting for him. Not to mention he had a fierce lion inside of him that needed a strong lioness to stand by his side and Lara was certainly not that. No, she couldn’t put herself through that. Falling for Archer any more will only end in pain. She sat with her thoughts for a moment before she realised the sooner she left his house, the better.
Lara got out of bed and padded down the hallway where she was met with the smell of coffee brewing and bacon frying. Her mouth watered as she stepped down the stairs and into the kitchen where she was met with a fully clothed Archer. He was wearing a plain grey t-shirt that hugged his biceps and dark jeans that hung off his waist. He had his back to her, but she could see his muscles flexing through his thin t-shirt as he fried the bacon on the pan in front of him and manoeuvred around to the eggs he was cooking on another frying pan. The man can multi-task.
“Just in time” Archer said as he turned and smiled at her, placing the eggs and bacon on a plate and pouring two cups of fresh coffee. Lara pulled out one of the kitchen stools and sat across from him on the bench as he pushed the coffee and breakfast in front of her.
“This looks amazing, thank you so much” Lara couldn’t hold back the giant smile on her face. She hadn’t had a decent breakfast in what felt like forever. As someone who hated mornings, it meant she was never prepared enough to make herself a decent breakfast, relying only on a quick smoothie to set her up for the day. Lara’s smile dropped as the thoughts of her old morning routine reminded her of the life she used to live, the life where she had a job, friends and security and after almost two months of being off the grid, she’d be surprised if she still had any of those left. The feeling of dread welled in the pit of her stomach, if she didn’t have a job, then she wouldn’t be able to afford the expense of keeping her parent’s place afloat. All the more reason to go home as soon as possible and get back on track she thought to herself, a large part of her felt disappointment at the idea of leaving Archer and going back to her old life but she pushed those thoughts aside.
“Mmmmmmmm yum” Lara said through a mouthful of egg, closing her eyes and enjoying the taste. It was good, really good. She could add ‘Good Cook’ to the long list of things that Archer had going for him already, but then again maybe this was just the standard ‘morning after’ type of stuff that he did for all the girls he brought home. Lara felt a hint of jealously at that sobering thought. When she opened her eyes, Archer was facing her and standing completely still, frying pan in one hand and spatula in the other hand, his gaze was set on her mouth and he had a hunger in her eyes that she’d never seen before. For a split second, the dark brown colour of his eyes flashed to gold and then back to the deep brown before he shook his head slightly, swallowed hard and then went on to plate up the egg and bacon. He took the plate and walked around the bench to sit at the stool next to Lara before digging in to his own breakfast.
“Seb and Jen have gone into town to pick up some clothes. I let them take my jeep but when they get back, if you still want to go home, I…I can take you back to Brunsville” Archer said between bites. She hadn’t been a shifter for long, but she knew it wasn’t a human instinct to be able to read emotions so well and she could sense him hesitating.
Deep down Lara wanted to admit to Archer how she felt about him and hope that he felt the same way, but she knew that was never going to happen. With his looks and his charm, he must have women throwing themselves at him and she could only imagine how many of these women he cavorted with. She didn’t want to be just another notch on a man’s belt, she wanted to be important, she wanted to be special, she wanted to be someone’s one and only and she could never have that with Archer.
Lara’s friends used to call her ‘the responsible one’, hell, even her foster parents used to tell her to ‘live a little’ but that just wasn’t in her nature. She was a black and white type of person, a realist. She was a head strong woman who took care of her own problems and right now, it was easier to run back to her old life than give admit to Archer how she really feels and put herself in such a vulnerable position. Besides, there was still so much she needed to process, emotionally. She hadn’t dealt with the loss of her parents, she just found out she was a shifter, she was imprisoned and tortured and not to mention, she killed someone. She needed time to heal her mind and her heart.
“That would be good, thank you” Lara’s voice trembled. The more she thought of leaving Archer, even though she knew it was the smart thing to do, the more her instinct told her otherwise. She felt such a strong urge to be near him but if she stayed and let go of all her inhibitions, it would be to her detriment and after everything she’d been through, she wasn’t strong enough to withstand another hit. Her mind and heart were at war now, her heart was pulling her towards Archer, but her mind knew she had to leave and she’s sure the torment was obvious in her tone of voice.
“It would be nice to stay, really nice, but I need to get home and try to put the pieces of my life back together. I…I think I’m a bit too broken to be around people right now” Lara didn’t know what came over her, she shouldn’t be admitting that out loud, but then again, it was true. Lara had been looking down at her em
pty plate when she said it but out the corner of her eye, she saw Archer turn his head to look at her.
“I don’t think you’re broken” he said softly “There’s nothing broken about you”. He turned his body to face her now. She slowly looked up and met his gaze, his dark brown eyes so intense, she couldn’t pull her eyes away even if she wanted to.
Archer reached forward and swung her stool around so that she was facing him with her body, her knees fit perfectly in between his. He lifted his hand and cupped her cheek and when she instinctively leaned into his touch he whispered, “You’re beautiful”.
Lara opened her eyes “You’re so beautiful. I haven’t known you for very long, but what I do know is that you’re brave, smart and you’re the strongest person I know. I mean, even Dr Seville couldn’t get you to shift in that exam room… and you’ve been hiding a badass black panther inside you this whole time. You’ve been through so much. Hell, a few days ago you didn’t even know you were a shifter, but instead of giving up on everything, you’re here saying you need to go home and piece your life back together again. You don’t realise how strong you really are, Lara.”
Lara’s breath caught in her throat, she had never been told anything like that before. Her parents loved her and cared for her immensely, but they brought her up to be independent and not to rely on others for confidence or encouragement. Now, here was Archer, saying things to reassure her and encourage her, and it felt…comforting. Suddenly Archer was making her feel things she hadn’t felt for a long time, if ever, but as much as Lara wanted to believe in what he was saying, he had missed out on one thing...
“I’m a killer, Archer. I’m not brave or strong, I’m a coward, a murderer.” Lara let out a sigh and pulled away from his hand that had been resting against her cheek. She looked up at him as he repositioned himself on the stool and sat up straighter. She saw his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed hard and took in a deep breath “Lara… there’s…there’s something I need to tell you-”
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