by K. J. Emrick
A rustling over by the Christmas tree drew her attention. Tiptoe was wrestling with Smudge in the torn gift wrapping. Smudge had tolerated his daughter’s playful paw slaps but when she jumped on his back he rolled and pinned her down and held her there until she swished her tail fiercely and mrrowled to be let go. He might be old but he could still hold his own.
Nosing Tiptoe’s face, Smudge licked her cheek. With everything forgiven, she flopped onto her back, and began swatting him with her paws once more. Let’s do it again, Dad! Let’s do it again!
Darcy felt her eyes drooping. It was barely midmorning and they had several long and lazy hours to spend together as a family before meeting Aaron and Grace at their apartment for Christmas dinner. They were going to Pastor Phin’s evening service, too. The town had rallied behind him after his arrest and exoneration. He was still their pastor, and would be for as long as he wanted to be.
Dinner and church were for later. For now, the day belonged to them.
She held her wrist up above her face and let the charms on her new bracelet dangle. This was her gift from Colby and Jon, a mother’s bracelet with bangles like a gold heart, a quarter moon with a smiling face, a cat, and angel’s wings. She liked it a lot. It was pretty, and she definitely hadn’t expected it.
“Thank you,” she said again.
“You’re welcome,” he said with a kiss in her hair. They were both in their pajamas still, and she could feel his heart beating through his plaid shirt top. Strong, and steady. “I can’t wait to see my present.”
“I told you,” she said, “later.”
“Later, huh? Why later?”
Darcy snuggled into him more. “Just because. Be patient.”
A knock on the door took them both by surprise.
“Are you expecting anyone?” Jon asked her.
“No. You?”
“Nope. Maybe it’s carolers. If they start singing Here We Come A-wassailing, I want in.”
Darcy reluctantly got up from her comfortable position in his lap and stretched to get circulation back into her limbs. Colby paused in her reading to look up. “Mom. Take a breath.”
Darcy finished her stretch, and her yawn. “I’m good, honey. Go back to your book. I’ll see who’s at the door.”
Smudge came over to sit with Colby, staring down at the book as if he could read the story with her. Silly, Darcy knew, but it sure seemed like he was scanning every word on the page.
Trailing her fingers along that sensitive spot behind Jon’s ear as she danced away from his playful grab, Darcy came out into the kitchen, making sure all the buttons on her pajamas were in place, telling herself that whoever had come visiting this morning would just have to accept that she wasn’t ready to get dressed yet and if they didn’t like it then they could just go and find their holiday cheer somewhere else—
She stopped. In the window of the door, she saw Grace.
Her sister held her gaze for a moment, and then waved, and pantomimed for her to open the door. Scowling, crossing her arms, Darcy took her own sweet time getting there to open up for her. She and Grace still hadn’t talked about what had been said between them. Darcy had so many questions and things she wanted to say but she just couldn’t get her head around what Grace had done when they were younger. It was Christmas, and she should be able to forgive her own sister, especially for something that had been done so long in the past. Or, so she told herself.
In truth, maybe a part of her did want to forgive Grace and let it all go. That part was growing daily, but she just couldn’t seem to figure a way past the pain and the hurt. Maybe if their mother was here, she could help Darcy understand. Only, it was just the sisters, so Darcy was going to have to find some way to solve this little mystery by herself.
The cold from outside suited her mood as she held the door open for Grace. Her sister was in her puffy winter coat and sparkly pink gloves and jeans. Definitely not dressed for work. Jon had given her and Wilson the day off for Christmas. At the same time, Darcy hadn’t expected to see her until tonight at dinner.
Grace stamped her boots on the rug, but she didn’t take them off. She didn’t unzip her coat. She didn’t make any move to stay at all. “I know,” she said, “that I’m not one of your favorite people right now.”
“Oh?” Darcy started to close the door. “What was your first clue? The fact that I haven’t returned your calls or the fact that you said you didn’t want anything to do with me or my curse?”
“Darcy, I never said I didn’t want anything to do with you.” She curled her lip with a sorry shake of her head. “At least, I didn’t mean to say that.”
“Then what did you mean?”
Someone else stepped up to the door and stopped Darcy from shutting it. “Maybe I can explain what she meant.”
Of all the people Darcy had expected to see today, her mother wasn’t one of them.
Eileen Bollinger was busy with her own life now, remarried and happy, and Darcy was proud of how much her mother had changed over the years. The stuffy, stodgy woman who had kicked her out to live here with her Great Aunt Millie was now wearing a stylish purple sequined coat, something she would have never worn before. She saw so much of herself in her mother. In spite of her silvered hair, the heart shaped face and her eyes and the way she carried herself were like looking into a clouded mirror of her own future self.
She reminded herself to take a breath. Just like Colby had told her she should do.
Smart girl.
“Mom? What are you doing here?”
“Nice to see you, too,” Eileen joked. Then she hugged both of her daughters at once. “It’s Christmas. The time for family. Us three girls are family.”
Darcy eased up on her resentment, if only just a little. “I know that, Mom. I just meant that I wasn’t expecting you to be here this year.”
“Oh?” Grace asked, stepping back from the embrace. “You mean, you misunderstood what she actually meant?”
“Shut up,” Darcy told her, but there was a little smile that crept up on her and made her feel a little better. “Mom, would you like some coffee, or some tea?”
“What I want, daughter of mine, is to talk to you.”
Darcy eyed Grace. “You couldn’t just come and talk to me yourself?”
“You wouldn’t return my calls, remember?” She hugged their mother again before Darcy could say anything. “I have to go. Darcy, I’ll see you at dinner tonight. You too, Mom.”
Then she left, and Darcy was alone in the kitchen with her mother.
“Well,” Darcy said. “What would you like to talk about?”
“Can we go to your room?” Eileen asked. “I’d like to be where little ears can’t hear us.”
“Little ears?”
Darcy understood what she meant a moment later when Colby came running into the room and threw her arms around Eileen to latch on like a little monkey climbing a tree. “Grandma! Grandma! Merry Christmas!”
“Hey, munchkin,” Eileen said, ruffing up her hair, and making her auburn highlights shine. “Merry Christmas to you! I’ve got a gift for you out in the car, but can you give me a little bit of time with your mom first? We need to talk about something.”
“I know,” the little girl said, and then skipped away, back to the living room to hop up on the couch with her dad and her new book.
“Um,” Darcy hummed. “I guess we’re going up to my room. Come on.”
Jon smiled and said hello to Eileen as they walked past to the stairs. She complimented his choice in pajamas, which made Colby giggle hysterically.
After closing the door on her bedroom, Darcy sat down on the edge of the bed and motioned for her mother to take a seat in the chair in the corner. Instead, to her surprise, she sat down right next to Darcy. “Honey, listen. Grace let me know that she told you about her having the family gift.”
“Mom, it isn’t fair. You sent me away because of it. I spent years wondering why my family didn’t want me and now I know that Grace
had the same gift. Not as strong, maybe, but still…” She combed her fingers into her hair, pulling it back from her face and trying for a smile. “I’m sorry. I just feel like everyone was against me. I mean, I know you didn’t know that Grace had the gift and I know we’re past the whole thing now because we’re all grownups but it still hurts, Mom. To hear her talk about me like I’m some freak, even now—”
“I knew, Darcy.”
Those words stopped her cold. “You knew… what?”
“Darcy, I knew. Both of my girls had the gift. Of course I knew.”
“No…” She shook her head fiercely. “You didn’t. You couldn’t… Mom? Seriously? But, you only sent me away. Why?”
“Oh, sweetheart, you need to understand. Please understand.” Her mother was twisting her hands around and around, her eyes searching Darcy’s. “I didn’t want to send you away. I loved you. I loved both of you. I just didn’t know what to do with… the gift. I was scared. Your sister Grace didn’t have much of it at all. But you? Darcy you were too much for me to handle. The things you did. Seeing ghosts? Talking to people who weren’t there… I knew I couldn’t help you. I couldn’t. I didn’t know what to do.”
“I know that, Mom,” Darcy said. “That’s why you sent me to Aunt Millie. You actually did me a favor. I got to learn how to use my gift and look at my life now, with Jon and Colby… this is all I could have hoped for.”
Her hand settled on Darcy’s shoulder. “I’m so glad to hear that. You have no idea. It’s all a mother wants for her child.”
“Then why didn’t you send Grace with me?”
“Because…” Her mother took a slow breath and then shrugged. “Grace wasn’t like you. She could, um, pass for normal. I could be a mother to Grace.”
“Just not to me,” Darcy said flatly. It wasn’t an accusation. It wasn’t an argument. It was a simple statement of fact. “You sent me away.”
“And that was the biggest mistake of my life! I never wanted… I just wanted to be a good Mom and I didn’t know how. I didn’t want what happened to my grandmother to happen to me.” She took a slow, shaky breath, biting down on her fingernail just the same way Darcy did sometimes. “My grandmother had the gift, too. Did Millie ever tell you that?”
Darcy thought about it. “I don’t think so.”
“She did. The gift isn’t as rare as you might think. Yes, it gets passed down on the mother’s side, and just to girls, but usually most of the girls in the family have, um, a little bit of it, one way or the other. It doesn’t skip a generation. It just shows up in different amounts. Some of us have so little of it that it might as well not be there. My grandmother, Millie’s sister, had it strong. So strong. Everyone thought she was crazy so she got sent to where the crazy people went. She died when I was seven, in that horrible place, all alone. I didn’t want that for you. Please. Don’t blame Grace. Don’t blame me. Darcy, I did the best I could.”
“Mom…”
“No, wait, please.” She put a hand up, asking Darcy to let her finish. “Grace didn’t need to go. She didn’t even know what was happening. Sometimes she knew an answer on a test at school before she even saw the question. Sometimes she knew it would rain two days before it happened. Just little stuff, but it came from the gift. That was all, though, and I didn’t make a big deal out of it so she never knew… She didn’t recognize it for what it was until she saw how strong you had it. I think it still scares her a little bit. But she doesn’t think you’re a freak, Darcy.”
“If you’re here to defend her,” Darcy started to say, “then just forget it, Mom, because I heard what she said. She thinks I’m a—”
“She thinks you’re her little sister, who she cares about very much. Darcy, she’ll never understand what the gift really is, or what it can do for those who have it.” She wiped away tears from her eyes. “She loves you, Darcy, and so do I. Please, don’t be angry with her. If you have to be angry with someone then let it be me. You were so mad at me for so long, and if you have to hate me again then I can take it but I can’t take my two girls being mad at each other.”
It took her a long moment, but Darcy was finally able to admit to herself that her mother was right. “I don’t hate you, Mom. I don’t even hate Grace. I was just… mad. I’m always the odd one out. I’m always the… the freak. You didn’t want that for me? Well, I don’t want that for Colby, either. The gift in her is so strong, Mom. The things she can do now… the things she’ll be able to do later on… I can’t even imagine.”
“Darcy, the gift settled in you stronger than it did in any of us. Except your Great Grandmother and Great Aunt Millie, of course. It chose you, not your sister. The gift chose you, and I can see why. The things you do with it, the way you help people, the way you solve problems and keep working to help your friends and neighbors even when sometimes they don’t want you to… that’s something special. That’s why the gift chose you. That doesn’t make you a freak,” her mother promised. “That makes you wonderful. It will make Colby wonderful someday, too.”
Darcy felt herself getting choked up. Her mother really did love her, and Grace too, even if she hadn’t always known how to show it. She accepted her for who she was. She didn’t want Darcy to change.
And Darcy didn’t want to, either.
Her mother put her arms around her, and there were tears from both of them, even if neither of them pointed it out to the other. The hug was even more awkward than it had been downstairs but it had a definite healing effect. Darcy felt the knot of boiling emotion that had been coiled up in the pit of her stomach for the last two weeks evaporating, little by little, with each breath. Darcy would always be who she was. Knowing that her mother accepted her now, and had only wanted the best for her before, meant the world to her. And maybe she understood her sister’s words a little bit better, too.
After a long moment of time, when everything seemed to go on for an eternity, Darcy took a breath.
“I love you, Mom.”
Her mother cleared her throat, and wiped tears from her eyes. “I love you too, Darcy. And what about your sister?”
“Yeah, I suppose I love her, too.” Darcy had to laugh. Her mother, the woman who had always seemed so distant and beyond approach, was now the woman keeping their family together. “So, I’ll see you tonight for dinner at Grace’s?”
“I wouldn’t miss it. By the way, who else is here?”
“Hmm? Just me and Jon and Colby. Why?”
“Oh. I was just wondering about the two cars that were in your driveway.”
Darcy blinked at her.
No. Jon wouldn’t…
She jumped up from the bed and ran downstairs, over to the kitchen window, to look outside. There was her mother’s car, the blue compact car that she’d had for years, and Jon’s car. Then, closer to the house, was a white Honda Civic. It looked sleek and sporty and completely out of place in her driveway.
“Like it?” Jon asked her, suddenly leaning close at her shoulder. “I was wondering when you were going to look outside. Ellen helped me pick it out. She said something about it being one of the safest cars on the road right now but that it still looked like whoever was driving it was a bad… girl. Ahem. Or something like that.”
Darcy couldn’t believe it. She’d asked for a car for Christmas but she didn’t think Jon would really go and do it!
With a squeal of delight she threw her arms around his neck and kicked her feet up off the floor. “Jon! How did you… when did you… oh, I love it!”
He twirled her around and then set her down and walked her back into the living room where Colby danced around them. Eileen watched them from the stairs with a wide smile, and two cats sat curled up under the Christmas tree, keeping an eye on all the antics. It was a perfect moment, made even better when Jon kissed her warmly and started to sway with her to the music of Kenny Loggins singing Celebrate Me Home from the television station.
Once upon a time, Colby would have pushed her way in between her mother
and father, insisting that they stop kissing. Now she watched them with keen interest, maybe looking forward to the day that she could be a wife herself, and dance with her husband on Christmas morning.
“You’ve given me so much,” Darcy whispered against Jon’s lips.
“It’s just a car,” Jon told her, in that macho guy way that all men slipped into sometimes. “You needed one. You’re a mother with a family. You need to have some way to get places.”
She shook her head, resting her face against his cheek. “I didn’t mean the car. I meant our daughter, and our life together.”
“You’ve given me just as much,” he told her, still dancing slowly with her. “We’ve been so good for each other, and I can’t imagine my life without you.”
She was warm all over, her heart beating in time with his, and she couldn’t imagine ever feeling better than she did, right now.
Especially since it was time to give Jon his gifts.
“Are you ready for your Christmas presents?” she asked him.
“Do it Mom!” Colby said, jumping up and down excitedly. “Now is good! Now is good! Grandma, grandma, Mom’s going to tell Dad what his gift is. Come listen!”
Jon raised an eyebrow. “This must be some gift. I can’t wait.”
Darcy stared deeply into his beautiful blue eyes, biting on her lower lip as she smiled. “You have a new watch waiting for you in our room. One of those military ones with a compass and a thermometer and a few other little gadgets. It’s waterproof, too.”
“Ooh,” he said, honestly impressed. “I’ve wanted one of those for a while. Thanks, Darcy.”
“That’s from me and Colby,” she told him.
“Then thank you, too,” he told Colby, winking at his little girl.
Colby kept smiling and hopping from foot to foot. She knew there was more.
“I have another gift for you, too,” Darcy told him.
“Oh?”
“Yes. This one’s just from me.”
“Okay.” Darcy could tell the suspense was killing him.
“Well,” she added, “actually it’s from me… and you.”
