by Brisa Starr
I throw my head back. With tears filling my eyes, I look up at the sky. It’s dark and gloomy, like my life, as of this morning. I’m back to the beginning… again.
He tips my chin in his direction and says, “Aspen, of course you have money. You have my money.”
“Ryker, I can’t take your money. You know that,” I say, weakly. I would’ve snapped my response at him, but I just don’t have it in me. I’m wiped out. I’m so tired of the constant struggle.
“As my future wife, you can.”
“God. Ryker, please don’t joke right now.”
He shakes his head. “I’m not, babe. It was never a joke. But…” he says and smiles, determined to drag me out of my shadows. “You are stubborn, and you know it’ll happen one of these days. I have an idea.”
My neck spasms from the stress, and although I’m fatigued, I look at him, waiting to hear what he has to say.
He continues. “And before I tell you, let me remind you that I’m. Not. Going. Anywhere.” His gaze pierces me, and he continues, “Nod your head in acknowledgment that you understand, I am not going anywhere, and we are together,” he commands, nodding, as if to lead me.
And he is here.
Holding me up through this horrible experience.
God, what would I do without him right now?
I gasp, suddenly desperate for air, as I realize what this morning would’ve been like if he hadn’t been here with me. I grab on to him and hug him, squeeze him tight like my life depends on it, and he wraps his strong arms around me, and I never want to be without him.
I want his help.
I don’t want to do this alone.
I look up at him and nod my head, ready to hear his idea.
29
Ryker
My protective nature wants to do everything I can to make Aspen feel safe, and she’s warming to my efforts. I clear my throat.
“Now that I have your undivided attention, I’ll tell you what we are going to do.” I step back and put my arm around her as we turn to face The Rose, water still dripping from the roof and walls.
“I will help, and you will let me. And do you know why?” I ask, and she turns her face to me. “Because we’re lovers, and that’s what lovers do for each other, Aspen. I help you when you need it, and you help me when I need it.” I squeeze her closer to me and continue. “So, I fully expect you to be there for me. Trust me, someday, I’ll cash in my chips.” I wink at her and smile. “I’m building up my investment in you, because I believe you’re a good one.” I kiss her cheek, and she tries to smile.
Progress.
“Seriously, babe, we’re here for each other, and I know I can count on you to be there, when I need you.” Her smile brightens a bit more. She knows I’m right. “You will always be able to count on me,” I say.
I’m about to tell her my plan, but she holds her hands up to interrupt me, her lips trembling again, and she whispers, “Ryker, I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t here.”
I grab her again, pulling her in, squeezing my support into her. “I know, and it makes me feel good that you see how useful I can be. Here’s what we are going to do. My first idea is to get married, and…”
She interrupts me with a huff and steps out of my arms, throwing her head back. She’s not in the mood for levity. And while I’d absolutely make good on the idea of marrying her, it’s true, I was only trying to lighten the mood.
I continue, undaunted. “But, seeing as you won’t let me whisk you off to Vegas to marry me tonight… and take my money because I’ll give it all to you…”
I pull her back into my arms and say, “Wait. Before I tell you my incredible solution to the fire, do I need to remind you again that I have all of this money because of you?”
“Ryker!” She exclaims, impatient with me.
“OK! OK!” And her lips turn up into a little smile, only a tiny tremble left. She’s still shaken, but I’m bringing her back.
“I will loan you the money, today, to get The Rose fixed. Bring in more contractors. Whatever you need. You can pay me back when the insurance money comes in,” I say, wanting to pat myself on the back.
She doesn’t resist, so I continue. “But, as any proper lending institution demands, I will charge you interest.” Her eyes widen as she waits for me to finish. “I expect nightly back rubs.”
She shakes her head, but she’s still smiling. I lean in and whisper, “And? I want you to feed me your delicious cherry pie, every day.” She inhales sharply, and I add, “And I’m not talking about the pie you bake.”
She laughs.
I did it.
I brought her out of the shadows, and her laughter fills my heart, like it does every time.
For the first time, I wonder if, when I tell her about my secret investment with Popster, she might not take it too badly.
The next few weeks fly by at jet speed. Between my legal work, which is fucking rad, plus squeezing in my training workouts at the gym for the Spartan race next week, and helping Aspen line up contractors to repair The Rose, we’re both swamped. Each night, we collapse into bed, exhausted, make insane love, and fall asleep in each other’s arms. It’s harmonic bliss.
Well, except for when the fire chief delivered his report. It was the vent hose. But Aspen is sticking to her plan to avoid the topic with her Popster, and I’m keeping my mouth shut and going along for the ride.
Next week is going to be nuts, as I finish my training for the Spartan race, but Aspen is more than happy to support my efforts. Part of me wonders if it’s because she knows my time in the gym gives her more time to work at The Rose after leaving Gabby’s Rooster. Who cares though. My woman is happy.
I’m about to leave the office, and I see Dad is still here. I take a seat in front of his desk and bring him up to speed on the Blackstar case. In one of our meetings between the inventor and the team here, I brought up a line of questioning that evolved into an hour-long discussion, and four whole new areas of patent coverage. The professor and I started geeking out, talking about marketplace analogs built on top of Ethereum, while Lois and Alek just sat there frantically scribbling notes. Which I had to explain to them later. I guess my knowledge of blockchain technology really has come in useful.
“You seem happy,” my dad says and smiles at me. “And I don’t just mean at work.”
“I am, Dad,” I say, leaning back, satisfied like the king of the jungle. “Things couldn’t be better. I’m falling in love. Aspen’s happy. I love the work here. I’m juiced!” I tease, but I’m also serious.
“Now I just have to convince her to marry me.”
He smiles, happy to see me so happy, but then his smile flattens. “But you haven’t told her yet?”
I shrug, confident. “No. I’m going to soon, but I’m not worried about it.”
He raises his eyebrows and tilts his head. I see his neck strain. “If you say so. But can I give you some unsolicited advice?”
“Absolutely. I rely on you for advice, Dad.”
“Have a plan. Think through how you’ll tell her, and possibly some different scenarios for how she might respond. Women don’t like to being lied to.”
“I know. And it’s not really a lie. I just withheld information. Things were different back then.”
He eyes me skeptically. “I dunno, Ryker. I’m just saying to think through all the angles. Like a good litigator, be ready for anything. And tell her soon.”
I walk into the room at the gym with the kettlebells, thinking about what Dad said. My latest plan is to tell Aspen straight up, matter-of-factly, like a normal conversation. The idea being, if I act like it’s no big deal, maybe she won’t either.
I meant it when I told Dad that I was falling in love with her. Maybe I should start with that? Tell her I love her, and then casually drop in the fact that I helped with the investment she needed. She just didn’t think she wanted it from me, at the time. But, like I told Dad, things are different now.
We
’re a couple.
He’s right though, I should think about how she might respond.
I start with some Russian kettlebell swings and focus on my form. Kettlebells can be dangerous if you throw them around like a jackass. But with the race coming up, I need to amp up my workouts with extra effort.
After a set, I put down the kettlebell to rest and go back to thinking about Aspen. I admit that I don’t know how she’ll respond when I tell her, but I’m a persuasive person, and although she’s stubborn, she’s told me that she’s the happiest she’s ever been in her life. And I know that’s because of her accomplishments… and because we’re together.
I walk back over to the kettlebell rack. I need to bust through this workout, so I can get home. To get more bang for my buck, I do American kettlebell swings instead of Russian. The American style lifts the weight much higher, and is controversial—it’s riskier—but I need to get this workout done, and I know what I’m doing. I bust out a set with no problem, and I like the strain in my muscles. I sit down for a rest before my next set.
My phone buzzes with a text message from Aspen.
Aspen: When are you coming home?
Me: I’ll be there in about an hour.
Aspen: Since tomorrow is Saturday, and Jessica will work at the bistro, I don’t need to be there. I plan to spend most of the day working at The Rose. I want to finish painting the trim.
Me: Sounds good. I’ll come help.
Aspen: You’re the best. Hey, what do you say about us sleeping at your house tonight?
Ryker: Hell yeah, baby. I’ve been wanting to fuck you in my bed ever since we christened the rug in the hallway.
Aspen: You sure know how to make a girl blush. And wet.
Me: That’s my job. What about Dagny?
Aspen: I’ll make sure she has food and water.
Me: OK, I’ll see you at my place in an hour.
Aspen: I can’t wait.
Me: You have no idea. ;)
I stand up and grab the kettlebell to finish my last set. And as I’m letting the momentum of the kettlebell swing from behind my legs, out in front of me, and up over my head, an image of Aspen lying naked in my king-size bed flashes in my mind, and I lose my focus. I release the tension in my core, and my shoulder loses stability. “Ow! Fuck!” I bellow as my shoulder feels like it’s tearing, and I bring the kettlebell down too fast, dropping it, and grabbing onto my right shoulder with my left hand.
Buck runs into the room when he hears me scream. “Ryker, are you OK? What happened?”
“I tweaked the fuck outta my shoulder.” I turn to face him, and I realize my back also hurts. “My back, too.”
“Shit, man,” he says as he runs over to me. He puts my good arm around his shoulder, and he helps me get to a bench to sit down. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.” He runs into the other room, and a moment later, he returns with a bag of ice and puts it on my shoulder.
“Do you have any motion? What were you doing when it happened?”
“Kettlebell swings. American.”
“Goddammit, Ryker, you dumbass. You know better! I’ve told people over and over not to do those goddamn things!” he yells.
“I know! I know! I was going for more intensity because the race is coming up.”
“Shit, man. Why do I have to keep telling people? If you want to push yourself, just go heavier with the Russian swing!”
Fuck.
I’m an idiot.
Buck looks at me and says, “Can you walk? Do you want some ibuprofen?”
“It hurts like a motherfucker, but I think the worst thing is that I can’t work out.” It dawns on me… I won’t be able to do my race either. Fuck. I’d really been looking forward to it.
But I’m not as upset as I’d have imagined. If I’m honest with myself, the races just gave me something to do. My interest with them for the past year has been more of a distraction from life, which I no longer need because I’ve got Aspen. The shittiest part of injuring myself is that I can’t fuck the hell out of her tonight. And I won’t be of much use to her tomorrow at The Rose.
I stand up to see if I can walk. I can, but I have to go slowly. My right arm is useless, but my car is an automatic, so I should be OK to drive.
I turn to Buck. “Yeah, I’ll take some ibuprofen, please.”
He heads into his office and comes out with the ibuprofen, a bottle of water, and a metal tin.
“Here,” he says, “rub this on your shoulder and lower back.” He opens the tub, and it’s full of white, creamy goop. He holds it out to me, and I scoop some out with my fingers and rub it on my shoulder, and then I put some on my back.
“Goddamn, that stinks,” I say, scrunching up my nose.
“You’ll thank me tonight,” he says, serious. He screws the cap back onto the tin and hands it to me. “Take it. Put it on again tomorrow morning, and then tomorrow afternoon.”
“Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”
“Good luck.”
Twenty minutes later, I pull my car into my driveway and see Aspen’s car parked there. She gets out of it when she sees me pull up, and I get out slowly and carefully, trying to minimize my movements. She sees me hobbling and runs over.
“Ryker! What happened to you? Are you OK?” Her brown eyes are filled with worry, and I can’t help but wonder if getting injured was worth it to see how concerned she is about me.
“Yeah, I’ll be OK. I got a little aggressive with the kettlebells, and… got distracted.” I laugh, and she looks at me, confused. “Mid-swing, I pictured you in my bed, naked, with your legs spread. I lost my concentration and threw my back out and fucked up my shoulder.”
“Oh god, Ryker, I’m so sorry!”
“So yeah, it’s your fault,” I wink.
“It is not!” She snaps and then goes to hit my shoulder playfully, but I wince in anticipation, and she quickly puts her hand down. “Oh gosh, sorry!”
We walk slowly to the house, and I unlock the front door. As we head inside, I say, “I need to get you a key.”
Upon hearing this, she stops, her eyes wide. She’s unsure of what to say, and a smile spreads across my face, and for a moment I forget about the pain. “Speechless?”
“I just don’t know what to say.”
“That’s what speechless means, dear.”
“Ha ha,” she says, dryly.
“I’ll tell you what to say. You tell me, you’re giving me a key to your place, too. This is it. You and me, babe. A couple. Forever.” Her face flushes with shyness, and excitement glitters in her dark, luminous eyes. She steps over to me and gently pulls my face to her and kisses me. “Deal.”
We walk into the kitchen, and I tell her, “Well, I won’t be able to do my Spartan race now.”
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. What a bummer. Is there anything I can do to help?”
I move my eyes to her succulent, red lips and say, “Why, yes, now that you mention it.”
She smiles coyly. “Aren’t you in pain?”
I give her a seriously? look. “Allow me to introduce you to the male gender.”
She snorts and nods, understanding… and I find it very erotic. As though nursing her injured hero, and servicing him sexually, are part of her girlfriend duties.
I got all of that from a nod.
Her brown eyes blaze hot.
She knows exactly what I want.
She knows exactly how to please me.
She steps over to me and takes my hand in hers, and we slowly walk to the bedroom. She looks at me, pure seductress that she is, and says, “You just lie on your back, honey. Get comfortable, prop yourself up on pillows, if you’d like. And you let me take care of you.”
I’ll tell her about the investment tomorrow.
30
Ryker
I open my eyes and turn my head to see Aspen sleeping next to me in my bed. Her luminescent, pale blond hair spreads out like a fan over her pillow. She’s like a sunrise. Sweet and peaceful. I try to tur
n my body, to pull her into my arms, but pain shoots through my lower back, preventing me from moving. Shit. My back must be seriously jacked.
I test my right shoulder… ouch! Also jacked.
Shit.
I take my good arm and reach my hand out to rest on hers. She opens her eyes and looks at me.
“Hi,” she says, and as her mouth goes wide in a yawn, I remember what she did to me with her mouth last night. The ecstatic memory is burned into my mind. The visuals… oh my god. My cock responds. I look down at it. She follows my gaze and giggles.
I smile at her. “So, remember when I told you before, that I would need your help someday?”
“Yeesss,” she drawls and scoots closer to me. She grabs my thick shaft with her hand and starts stroking it. “Is this what you had in mind?”
I breathe. “God, Aspen, you’re magic. That feels so good.”
She bats her eyelashes and says, “I want to get on top of you and ride you like a bronco, but with your lower back, I think I better stick to my mouth.” She pulls the sheet down, and kneels between my legs, her glorious tits hanging down as she bends over and takes my cock in her warm mouth. She skips the gentle warmup and sexy tongue flicks, proceeding straight to her no-bullshit, high-powered, steam-piston cock sucking. It’s like she’s on a mission to get her breakfast.
“Are you hungry?” I tease.
Big brown eyes look up under her lashes, and with my cock still in her mouth, she moans affirmatively. Her mouth is so soft and wet, and her rhythm is so perfect, I’m instantly ready to blow my load into her mouth.
