by A Lonergan
My phone buzzed with a text beside my bed.
Rafe- Meet in the war room for lunch.
The war room? Was I missing something? I texted back a big ‘Huh?’.
Rafe- Never mind, I’ll come to your house for lunch.
I didn’t bother with replying. He would come whether I wanted him to, not that I didn’t want him to. I was beyond confused by what had happened between us the previous night. I hadn’t wanted him to leave and when he did, I felt the emptiness in my soul. Nalia had chuckled and gone back to sleep like she knew all about these feelings.
“Have you ever been mated before?” I asked out loud as I got dressed for the day. Based on the snores coming from the room next door, Lucas was still sleeping. I wondered what he would think when he woke up to find Rafe’s scent all over the hallway. He had paced in front of my door for a while before he had decided to enter. His scent was too thick for it to be anything else.
Nalia hummed in my head while I brushed my teeth. My eyes flashed yellow in the mirror. No, I have never been mated and I have never wanted to be mated until I scented Rafe. Being mated is a soul commitment. Rafe’s wolf hasn’t known a mate either.
I spat the toothpaste in the sink before I kicked the shower on. “Is that how every wolf is?” Lucas would probably wake up to me talking to myself.
Nalia rolled over in my head like a puppy. Her face seemed to transform in my head to a look of disgust at the comparison. No, some wolves are put into new bodies when the old ones die and they have to find their mates again and again.
“How exhausting.”
The water was scorching on my skin but I didn’t want it any other way. It made my mind go blank. It took away all of my worries. By the time I got out of the water, my skin was a bright pink and my back no longer ached.
I clicked on the coffee pot for Lucas and sat down at the table waiting for my toast when he finally opened the door to his bedroom. He gave me a grin as he scratched his chin. His scar on his neck was too visible today like it was begging for attention. He grinned when he saw that the coffee was running already and poked his head in the fridge for his yogurt.
“Did you have a good night with Rafe?” I had been waiting for it but it still made me blush to hear him ask it out loud.
“Nothing like that happened,” My toast popped up and I rushed to retrieve it.
His face was unreadable as he opened his yogurt and dug right in. “I know, his retreating scent was one of shame and disgust.” A grin widened his mouth as he leaned forward. “Did you fart? Was it a nasty fart?”
My hands smacked him away before I sat down at the table. “You’re disgusting. No,” I chewed on my lip. “I don’t know what happened. One minute we were talking about my snoring.”
Lucas interrupted me. “Your snoring is pretty bad.”
I rolled my eyes and ignored his comment. Pot meet kettle. “Then he admitted that the worst sound he had ever heard was him ripping his hand through his father’s chest. He was gone before I could say anything else.”
Lucas’s face turned sour. “Yeah, that explains the scents left in the house. I thought it was because you turned him off and I was right but damn.”
My shoulders slumped. “How do I fix this?”
“You let him tell you what happened. You let him trust you enough to fill you in. Granny told me a little of what happened while I was gone but his personal reasons are still unknown. Axel, Alice, and Rafe are the only ones that know what happened that day.”
There was no way I was going to get comfortable enough with Axel to ask him and there was also no way I was going to approach Alice about one of the most painful experiences of her life. I couldn’t imagine the pain she was going through. The clock on my phone reminded me that today was my first day back at the manor. I didn’t know if I was ready to get work done, but I needed some kind of normalcy in my life again. I needed a routine as magic buzzed around the Pack Land.
“Do you have anything planned for today?” The toast was dry in my mouth as I shoved the rest down my throat.
Lucas leaned back in his chair. The front two legs on the chair hovered over the tile. “Granny wants to offer me a job but I’m worried that the little menace will make my life a living hell.”
“Children are difficult creatures. Maybe she just needs some love?” I wrapped my fingers around a water bottle in the fridge before I tossed it into my bag.
“She needs a straight jacket and her magic taken away. We didn’t talk about what happened last night.” Fear took over his features. “Her magic is out of control. She took over my mind. I couldn’t do a damn thing. She had me dancing around the kitchen like a freaking monkey!”
As horrified as I was, I couldn’t stop the laugh from escaping my lips. “Yes, her mother did the same thing to me for Damian.”
The front legs on the chair slammed to the floor. “He didn’t?”
I shook my head. “No, he didn’t make me do anything like that. He made me see Rafe for the first time when the pack was on my trail. We could have avoided the entire thing had I known that children were held hostage but I think Damian was just trying to show me the power he could wield. I don’t think he actually cared about how the interactions went.”
Lucas nodded to himself. “This should be an interesting day. I think Granny is going to offer me compensation for being the child’s monkey though and I don’t like that.”
“High ball her,” I shrugged as I pulled a sweatshirt over my tank top. “What’s the worst she could say? No? Then what? She’s out of a test dummy.”
“I guess I could use the money. I would like to contribute around here.” He looked down into his empty yogurt container. “Buy groceries and such.”
“I’m sure there are other jobs around the pack. Talk to Alice.” Then an idea struck me. “You could be my assistant and make me smoothies.”
His face fell. “I do not like that idea. I think I would be better off as Valentina’s mind slave.”
I wanted to tell him that it wasn’t that bad, but I knew it was. I had been on the other end of it. “Maybe they will find a coven that will take her in and you won’t have to do it anymore or for very long.”
Lucas rolled his eyes skyward. “Except she’s rare. Her kind of magic was snuffed out for a reason. Mind slaves were a thing for entirely too long. Her line of magic is royalty and powerful. You won’t find a coven that will want her and you won’t find any witches wanting to come forward to admit they have the same magic. She could very well be the last of her kind.”
My head was aching by the time lunch rolled around. When Rafe knocked on the door, I had completely forgetten I had promised him lunch.
“Working hard or hardly working?”
My lips twisted. “You sound like my dad. When did you become a middle-aged man?”
His face contorted in mock horror. “When I discovered my mate and started making all these middle-aged plans.”
A hum rumbled up my chest. Nalia was very pleased with his words. I rolled my eyes. Get over yourself. I thought to her.
“The war room is a place that my father’s father designed to plan war and other activities that women weren’t allowed to sit in on,” Rafe paused. “I don’t want to run a pack like that. I want my mate beside me in my planning but I will warn you that emotions aren’t allowed in there. We must be professional, even if Knox is not.”
My chair squeaked as I turned it around and grabbed my purse. Then thought better of it and shoved it into the bottom drawer. I followed Rafe out of my office and locked the door behind me. His eyebrows met his hairline.
I shrugged. “There’s a lot of information in there. I’m not worried about my wallet. It’s practically empty.”
A growl rumbled down the hall. My eyes snapped to Rafe in surprise. “My wolf doesn’t like that. He wants to take care of you. He wants to shower you in everything you could ever want.”
A thrill washed over me. I had never been the kind of woman that want
ed to be taken care of but I wasn’t exactly mad about what he was saying either. Nalia purred right back and I thought I was going to be sick. Can you two save it for the full moon? I thought to her.
She sighed with dramatic flare. No, because neither of you will accept the bond yet and the last thing I want is to be kicked from your mind for claiming my mate.
They would have to stay apart for the full moon. I wasn’t exactly surprised by this. The wolves had accepted the bond, Rafe had accepted the bond. The only one that hadn’t was me. I was still fighting my humanity and who I had been raised to be.
“I would like to swear myself to you and your pack,” The words escaped my lips before I could stop them. Rafe pivoted on his foot and stared down at me with a bit of confusion visible on his face.
“Are you sure about that? I think you’re a Sigma and they don’t do well under Alphas.” He swallowed and I watched as his jaw twitched. He didn’t want to deny me but he was giving me the chance to walk away.
“What does that mean?” No one had explained this to me and I was still confused as I had been that first shift.
“It means you’re a lone wolf. You don’t need the social standards that other wolves need. They need the pack dynamic. You technically aren’t less dominant than I am but when you swear to the pack you will have to bow down. Your wolf could fight it.” His lips slid together in a thin line. I could smell how upset he was in the air. He didn’t want to dissuade me from being in the pack but he respected me enough to tell me. “You might never be happy here.”
“Nalia accepted you and this pack before I did. I think she will be fine.” She practically panted in my head with acceptance. She wanted to be here more than I did.
Rafe could probably smell her desperation in the air. She wanted to be accepted but his words made something hurt in my chest. “You may never be accepted here. Women aren’t looked to for dominance. They raise the cubs, they hold the pack together. Females don’t go to war or have their own thoughts. They rely on their mates for mostly everything. Most females aren’t dominant. You wouldn’t get acceptance from the people here. Just like Tracey never has.”
It was no secret that Tracey was a lone wolf too. “Then why does Tracey stay here? She’s a lone wolf too, huh?”
Rafe sighed and it ripped through me. It was filled with too much pain. I could see the weight that he carried on his shoulders. It was too much. Would I ever be the one to take from it and put it on my own or would I only add to to the weight there? “She’s my Beta. There are no Betas in our world that are female.” I was about to say something when he held his hand up. “When she was a child, my father felt the dominance in her. At such a young age he sent her to other packs. They toured the entire country and were in talks of going overseas. He had to see if she was just dominant here in our pack or if it was a universal thing. From what he gathered… it wasn’t just our pack. It was every pack. She outranked wolves as a child. It made many packs angry with us. How could we have these abominations? My father never once considered her that. He just imagined that things were changing for the better. That the gods had finally heard the prayers of our females. I don’t know why she stays, but maybe you should ask her. It could help you make your decision for yourself and your life.”
“If she’s your Beta then why is Axel in that position? I’m confused.”
Rafe smiled and tilted his head to the side. He pressed his hand to the small of my back and my stomach dipped at the contact. I didn’t know if he knew what he was doing to me, but I wasn’t angry about it. “Because Axel is worried about her and what that will do to her standing in the pack. I think he also wants her to continue to be his little girl for longer. It’s a very complicated answer but he will be stepping down soon. I think he’s been waiting for her to prove herself all these years so it’s easier for the rest of the pack to accept her.”
I couldn’t wrap my head around it. This new world was much more complicated than I thought it could be. Everything I had been wanting was a mess in my head. What if I couldn’t swear to this pack and to Rafe? Would I be allowed to stay or would I have to forever be alone? Forced to live with the craze rogues? These questions fought to the tip of my tongue but I didn’t let them escape. My uncertainty was strong in the air. I had a lot I had to consider.
Chapter 6
Rafe
The war room was full and it did something to my pride. It strengthened me, made me stand up taller. Especially since I had my mate at my side. My father would have never let my mother come in here for fear she would get in the way of a man’s work but I didn’t think that way. I knew emotions weren’t permitted here but sometimes people did their best thinking in an emotional pinch. Not that I would ever admit that out loud. The last thing I needed was Knox deciding it was time for karaoke in here or something stupid like that.
I planted my hands on the edge of the round table and looked at my people. Jade sat down on my left without a second thought. My wolf swelled inside of my head. Yes. I ignored how content he was with these new developments. I couldn’t allow him to skew my judgment.
“Damian isn’t going to take what’s happened lightly. We need to plan for a possible war on our lands.” Tracey’s jaw clenched at my words. “We need safe houses put together and emergency protocols put in place. These children we have here are powerful, but they can’t hold off an army of their own and an army of wolves. You all have seen a small percentage of what we are up against.”
Tracey watched Jade with a satisfied gleam in her eye. “He’s going to come for us. You’re right, we do need to be prepared but we cannot do that here. We can’t put our elderly in danger. Maybe we need to leave Pack Lands for a few months.”
I considered her words and chewed on my bottom lip for a second before I answered. “I think you’re right, but I don’t know where we could go. We might have to evacuate the elders and have safe houses for the children here.”
“The elders can fight,” Archer argued. “Maybe we need to ask them what they want to do.”
“This isn’t their fight though, they might be tired of this. I am tired of this,” Gabriel shook his head. “We need to do what’s best for the pack. Asking them their opinions will only make this more complicated.”
Gabriel was right. If we asked one section of people what they wanted to do then it would open it up for the rest of the pack to have an opinion. This was going to be tough no matter what I decided. At the end of all of it, it didn’t matter what anyone else thought or wanted. All that mattered was my end vote. I was the Alpha here.
“We evacuate the elders and the children of our pack. We will keep the witch kids here but they will be kept safe by Carden and Granny. We will have to build a safe house for them or,” I considered my next words carefully. “They stay here in the war room. We don’t have much time to prepare and getting the elders out is going to be hard enough. This is one of the biggest buildings on the property besides the shed but that has the tractors and heavy machinery in it.”
Jade twisted her ponytail over her shoulder. “I think they should stay in the big machinery shed. It’s the last place they would think to look. If it’s the building I’m thinking of then it’s much larger than this and you don’t have to worry about children destroying your man den.” She winked at me and pride filled my chest. “You don’t have to worry as much about baby-proofing.”
Archer nodded his head. “I’m on board with that. We can put up the heavy equipment in one corner instead of it being spread out the way it is, then we can set up tents or whatever we need to make sure they’re comfortable.”
“I’ll talk to my mom and see what she wants to do and if we will be moving them there permanently. We could set up beds, not just tents.” Tracey threw Archer a look of disgust that he would actually suggest that these kids live in tents.
Gabriel was next. “We could even put up a wall between the areas like those barndominium homes.”
Knox grinned. “When I build my hou
se, that’s what I’m doing. Then I’ll have a place for my four-wheelers, trucks, and whatever else I want.”
Tracey's lips twisted in disgust again. “What does a werewolf need with a four-wheeler?”
“Have you ever tried to cut a shitty in your wolf form?” He leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest. I pinched the bridge of my nose.
Here we go.
“What is a shitty?” Jade asked.
Archer let out an exasperated sound. I thought he was going to be on my side and annoyed with the fact that we had strayed from topic until he opened his mouth. “You don’t know what a shitty is?” His eyes pleaded with mine. “Please let me explain this to her.”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “Go ahead.”
“Awesome,” He grinned. “A shitty is when you cut donuts in the grass or mud.” He narrowed his eyes as he thought for a minute. “Or in a parking lot.”
“Why couldn’t you have said cut a donut?” Tracey grumbled.
Knox placed his hand on his chest and his mouth fell open in offense. “Because cutting a donut is the most boring way to say anything ever.”
“Please get out of the war room,” My head fell forward and exhaustion filled my limbs. It wasn’t my fault they had the attention span of a donut. Jade’s green eyes sought out mine and I managed to smile slightly. Her face beamed up at me. All the men filed out of the room.
Tracey smacked my shoulder as she got up. “I really don’t know why you let them in here.”
“They’re my Guardians.” I shrugged.
She rolled her eyes. “You need to understand that you give them zero Alpha commands, they don’t know how to be serious if you don’t.”
Annoyance buzzed through me. I leaned down to her eye level. My wolf shot forward. “You don’t control this pack. You don’t know what it takes to do what I do. Until you know the pressure on my shoulders, do not speak as if you do. I have enough to worry about. If they want to be dumbasses sometimes then so be it. But don’t you dare try to tell me what to do.” My voice came out in a growl.
