“I don’t know if this is going to work out,” the man says, his eyebrows pinched together, looking at me like he thinks I’m a little nuts.
“Let’s talk.” I gesture at one of the seating arrangements and we move toward them. I take a seat opposite him. Otis jumps into my lap. My heart squeezes and I stroke his head and back. “Tell me about what services you’re looking for.”
“I need someone to walk him twice a day,” Dennis says. “Morning and evening. I work long hours.”
“So he’ll be alone all day?”
“Yes.”
I nod, sucking on my bottom lip. I know people have to work; that’s why I have a dog-walking business. It’s not my place to judge people. But I don’t believe this man cares about Otis. “Are you sure you really want a dog?”
He sighs. He looks across the lobby. “I don’t know. I got Percy just before I got sent overseas. I didn’t realize how much work he’d be. The last few days have been crazy. He has to go out all the time or he, uh, has accidents in the apartment.”
“Yes.”
“It was Christmas and I was busy and I kept coming home to messes. And he wants to play all the time.”
“Of course he does.”
“It was better when Karen and I were together. She helped look after him. Then I was so pissed off that she’d abandoned him, and I made such a big deal about making her find him and getting him back, I had to take him back.”
Sadness fills my chest and I nod slowly. “You don’t have to keep him,” I say quietly. “I volunteer at an animal shelter. We could find a home for him with someone who really wants him. But I’m pretty sure Easton would take him back.”
He makes a face and rubs his jaw. He stares across the lobby for a moment. “Yeah. That would probably be for the best.”
My heart leaps. “Really?”
“There’s a chance I’ll have to go to Hong Kong again in February. What would I do then? Do you look after dogs for months at a time?”
“No. Not for that long. I would tell someone who’s going to be gone for months at a time and has to leave their dog that they probably shouldn’t have a dog.” I say this kindly.
“Yeah. You’re probably right.”
“I expect Easton will be back tomorrow. You could talk to him then about taking Otis…er, Percy…back.”
“Would you take him?”
For a few seconds I’m confused. “Oh, you mean tonight?”
“Yeah. You could bring him to Easton tomorrow.”
My eyebrows raise. Is he that eager to get rid of Otis? “Okay. Sure. Uh, do you have his things?”
He rolls his eyes. “Oh yeah. He’s got a ton of stuff for a dog. I’ll…go pack it up and bring it down?”
“All right.” I frown. “You’ll come back, right?”
He huffs. “Yeah, I’ll come back.”
Holy shit. I’m going to have to see Easton. My heart is galloping. Tomorrow. I’ll see him tomorrow.
I play with Otis and talk to him for the time it takes Dennis to go up to his apartment and return with Otis’s bag. I recognize it from all the times I’ve taken him back to my place for overnight stays. Today, it’s packed full with every toy and treat he owns. Yeah, it’s a lot. Easton kind of spoiled him.
I stand and set Otis on the floor, gripping his leash. I take the bag from Dennis. “Thanks.”
“Thank you.” He appears relieved, and I’m glad, because I sure wouldn’t want to take Otis away from someone who loved him. “I’m sorry this didn’t work out for you. As a job, I mean.”
“Oh, that’s okay. I want what’s best for Otis. And it seems like it’s best for you too.” And maybe for Easton. “How did you get my name and number?”
“Easton gave it to me. In case I needed someone to walk him.”
My heart bursts into a glow and my lips tremble into a smile. My throat is thick as I swallow and turn to leave.
I walk home. The sun is out, glistening on the snow and ice, so I slide on my sunglasses. Otis prances on his leash, sniffing here and there.
I imagine the scene when Easton had to give back Otis and my heart hurts for him. I know he loves Otis even though he never wanted a dog and tried to get rid of him and had no idea how to look after a dog. At first. But the fact that he would give him up to return him to his rightful owner…oh man. That had to be so hard, to do the right thing.
I hope I’m doing the right thing too.
Easton
I roll out of bed and trudge into the bathroom for a shower. After getting back from Toronto last night, I came straight home and crashed. The last few days…hell, the last few weeks have been exhausting. It’s nearly noon and I had a good solid sleep, yet I still feel tired. Dragged out.
I’ve made progress, though.
It still feels weird not to have to take Otis outside before I do anything. I didn’t have him that long, but that damn dog managed to make himself part of my life. I miss the mutt.
After a shower, I dress in jeans and a hoodie and make myself scrambled eggs and toast and, of course, coffee. Which reminds me of Lilly. So many things remind me of her.
I pick up my phone and scroll through social media as I eat. I smile at a pic of Cookie wearing a Santa hat, flanked by his two sisters. I frown at a few posts I see about trade rumors. I don’t like to believe rumors, but where there’s smoke there’s usually a flame, and more than one sportswriter is talking about a trade between the Bears and the Stars, naming a few Stars defensemen, including Josh Heller.
I shake my head and scroll on, lingering over a photo Lilly posted on Instagram of her and Carlin with Carlin flashing a diamond ring. Huh. Looks like Carlin and William got engaged.
What does that mean for Lilly? She was worried about Carlin moving out and being able to afford the apartment.
I guess it’s not my business. Sadness washes over me.
I drop my phone.
A knock at the door jolts me. I frown. Is it Cookie or Russ? Did we make plans I forgot about?
I cross the living room and yank open the door.
Lilly.
My heart slams against my ribs.
And Otis.
My mouth drops open.
“What…?”
An uncertain smile flickers over her beautiful face. “Hi.”
I move my head from side to side, still not sure if this is real or I’m still in bed, asleep, having crazy dreams. “Hi.”
I look down at Otis, jumping up on me, crying. “You are such a badly behaved dog,” I mutter, bending to pick him up. “What the hell are you doing here?” I raise my questioning gaze to Lilly. “Both of you.”
“I brought Otis back to you.”
I’m still not comprehending. “Uh, come in. I’m a bit confused.”
Holy shit. I’m more than confused.
She walks in, bringing her scent with her, the scent that instantly makes me think of pressing my nose and lips against her skin, breathing her in. She’s carrying Otis’s bag, packed with his things, and her purse. She sets the bag down and removes her mitts. “So, this is kind of crazy.”
I stare at her, absorbing everything about her. Her shiny hair, her sparkling blue eyes, her pretty mouth. “I miss you.”
Her bottom lip quivers almost imperceptibly. She swallows. “I miss you too.”
“Yeah?”
She nods, her eyelashes fluttering.
Time stretches out, looping and wrapping around us. Finally I break the clotted silence. “You were right.”
Her eyes widen and her chin lowers. “About…?”
“Come in. Can I take your jacket? Would you like coffee? I’ll make you coffee.”
The corners of her mouth quirk. “Coffee would be great.”
As I set Otis down, she
lifts her cross-body purse over her head and sets it on the table, then unzips her puffy jacket. I help her out of it and hang it in the closet. My hands are shaking.
I walk to the kitchen, my legs feeling stiff and awkward. Otis prances around, completely at home. My head is spinning. I have this chance. A chance to talk to her. I don’t know if it’s another chance for us. Is that too optimistic? Too crazy? I probably don’t even deserve it.
I manage to brew a cup of coffee for her while she pulls Otis’s dishes out of his bag and fills one with water, setting it in the usual spot.
“First tell me about Otis,” I say. “What’s going on?”
She leans on the counter across from me, where she sat that day eating breakfast and told me she takes coffee seriously and busted my balls by telling me she’d clap when she was impressed with me and I thought she was so incredibly gorgeous.
“Dennis called me. He wanted me to walk Otis. Only I didn’t know it was Otis until I got here yesterday. He called him Percy.”
“Yeah.” I wrinkle my nose. “That’s a terrible name for him.”
“I agree. Otis is much better. Anyway, I was totally floored when I heard what had happened.” She tips her head. “I was really mad at you for firing me.” Then she narrows her eyes. “You never said what happened, so I assumed that.”
“I was…bumfused.”
She chokes. “What?”
“Bummed and confused.”
Her lips twitch. “Right. So. I was mad. And hurt. Anyway”—she waves a hand—“it was clear to me that Dennis…”—she spits out his name as if she’s eating one of Otis’s dog biscuits. She apparently feels the same about him as I do—“…doesn’t really want a dog. I convinced him it would be better for both of them to give Otis back.”
I run a hand through my hair. “Holy crap. How did you do that?”
She shrugs. I pass her the coffee and she picks it up and takes a small sip. “It actually wasn’t that hard. I assumed you would want him back.” She meets my eyes. “But I can take him to the shelter. Or maybe…” She stops.
“I want him,” I say quickly.
She smiles. “You love him.”
“I kinda do. I admit it.”
Her eyes warm. “Okay. He’s home, then. For good.”
Christ. A fist squeezes my throat and I can’t breathe for a minute. I feel a stinging in my sinuses. After I breathe through it, I say, “Thank you.”
She smiles, obviously knowing how I feel about this.
“Can I tell you what you were right about now?”
She rubs her nose with the back of her hand. “Okay.”
“Let’s go sit in the living room.”
We both sit on the same couch and shift to face each other, each holding our mug of coffee. That’ll keep me from touching her, which I so, so want to do.
“You told me I was a coward,” I begin.
She winces. “I’m sorry.”
“No.” I shake my head firmly. “You were right. You were right about a lot of things. I was afraid.”
She holds my gaze steadily even as she sips her coffee, waiting for me to continue.
“I went home for Christmas. I saw my mom.”
“How’s she doing?” she asks softly.
“Pretty good, actually. We had a good talk. It was…painful. But necessary.”
She takes another sip of coffee and tilts her head.
I swallow. “I told her how I felt after Dad and Bryce died. How I felt she didn’t care enough about me to try to keep going.”
She nods.
“And I realized that what I’ve been afraid of ever since is…well, I’ve been afraid of losing things I care about, obviously.”
“Like hockey.”
I squeeze my eyes shut briefly at the sharp twist I feel in my heart. “I’m so sorry I said that.”
“But it’s true. Hockey’s important to you.”
“It is.” I inhale a deep breath. “But it’s not the most important thing. The thing I was most afraid of losing was you.”
Her mouth trembles. Her eyes get shiny again.
“For real, Lilly.” I hold her gaze. “I was afraid of losing you. You told me you love me, and I was terrified of that. I’ve been terrified for ages because all I think about is you. You mean more to me than any other person. You’re everything. Everything I need. Everything I want.”
“Oh God.” She sets down her coffee mug, her hands shaking. “Oh, Easton.”
“I was afraid of caring too much for you. I’ve been afraid of caring too much for anything. I try to be all cynical, but the truth is, deep down inside I’ve been terrified of wanting something I can’t have. I realized that when I was talking to my mom.” Now I shift my gaze away. “When she told me she loves me, I realized…that’s all I want.” My heart is beating so fast, I might have a heart attack.
Lilly covers her mouth with her hands.
“I wanted to come and tell you that. But first I had to fix some things.” I draw in another breath. “Jammer, JBo, and I met with Mr. Julian and formally made a complaint about Coach’s behavior.”
Her eyebrows zoom up. “Really?”
“Yeah. And we filed a complaint with the players’ association. There’s an investigation going on now.”
“Oh my God.”
“Somehow it leaked to the media. You didn’t hear about it?”
Eyes wide, she shakes her head.
“You were right that we had to do something. I was inspired by you—how brave you were to do what you did when your employer was hurting people.”
She presses a hand to her chest. “Oh, Easton.”
“I thought you didn’t understand. Hockey’s different. But you did understand. And hockey’s not that different.” I grimace. “There’s no place for abuse and racism. Anywhere.”
She’s watching me closely, emotions flickering across her face.
“And you told me that being brave means deciding that something else is more important than my fears. And you were right about that too.”
Tears slide down her smooth cheeks.
“I was brave enough to talk to my mom, and she told me…Christ, women are smart.”
Lilly chokes on a little laugh. “She told you that?”
I smile. “No. That’s just my own observation. She told me that loving someone is worth the risk. And for her to say that…must mean it’s true.”
She smiles back at me, her nose and cheeks pink.
“You’re worth the risk. You’re more important than my fears.” I pause. “I love you, Lilly.”
A small sob escapes her lips. “Really?”
“Really. I’m sorry I hurt you. I shouldn’t have said that you aren’t going to win your lawsuit. I was just being a cynical dick. And I’m sorry I let you think that you aren’t important to me. So, so sorry. That’s the last thing I ever want to do. I was an idiot.”
“Yes.”
I snort-laugh. “Is there still a chance for us?”
“Yes. Please. I’ve been thinking too. I didn’t…maybe I was right about some things, but I don’t think I really understood how much you lost in that accident. How much it impacted you.” She shifts closer on the couch and I reach for her hands and grip them. “I didn’t realize how you felt you’d even lost your mom. You were so young, and on your own, and becoming a professional athlete is a huge thing. I get why hockey’s so important to you.”
“Christ, I love you.” I pull her closer still, practically onto my lap, and wrap my arms around her. She melts into me, holding me too, and for a moment we sit there embracing, neither of us speaking, both of us struggling with our emotions. But we’re struggling together.
Eventually I pull back and turn to her to fin
d her mouth with mine. She kisses me back, our mouths fusing, our hands clutching each other, kissing over and over and over. “I love you.” I kiss her cheek, her jaw. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too.”
Our mouths meet again for more kisses. I pour everything into those kisses, all my love and devotion and reverence for her and for her sweet optimism and idealism and loyalty.
A while later, she murmurs, “I have something else for you.”
“Oh yeah. Let’s move to the bedroom.”
She gives me a tap. “Not that. Well, not yet. Hold on, you horny hockey player.”
I laugh as she gets up and walks over to where she left her purse. She returns with a small box wrapped in Christmas paper. “I got you this for Christmas. I couldn’t return it, so…” She hands it to me.
I turn it over in my hands. “Should I open it?”
“Sure.”
I peel open the paper, then lift the lid off the tiny box to reveal a pair of silver cuff links. I lift one to study it and I see Otis’s tiny face. “Oh, man!” My gaze shoots up to hers. “It’s Otis!”
She clears her throat. “Yeah. They made them from a picture I had of him.”
Heat radiates through my chest. “They’re perfect.” I cough, because my damn throat is squeezing up. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“I, uh, actually have a Christmas present for you too.”
“You do?”
“I bought it in California. When we were on our road trip there. So I can’t return it either. I’ll get it.”
I truck into the bedroom and dig the small box out of my dresser drawer. I return and hand it to her. “I never wrapped it, sorry.”
She takes it hesitantly. The box is about the same size as the one she gave me. She opens it and peers down. “Oh.” She touches her fingertips to her lips, then lifts the pendant necklace. The small diamond-encrusted charm dangles on a silver chain—the charm shaped like a dog paw print.
She closes her eyes and her face gets pink like she’s trying not to cry. Then she draws in a breath through her nose, opens her eyes, which shine, and smiles. “Thank you. I love it.”
“I just want you to be happy.” I pause. “And naked.”
Must Love Dogs...and Hockey Page 22
