A Demon and a Dragon

by Virlyce

  Vur blinked at her before nodding. He slid off the stump he was sitting on and stumbled towards the fire before stretching himself out and yawning. The second his head touched the ground, snores rang out of his face. Four rocks crawled out of the runes on his body and sat around him in a square formation. Stella popped her head out of Vur’s chest and looked around. Then she flew out and towards Vur’s neck, crawling into his hair to use as a bed.

  “It looks like we don’t have to keep watch,” Alice said, staring at the elementals.

  “The earth never sleeps,” Diamant said in reply.

  “Neither do skeletons,” Mr. Skelly said. “You should rest too, Alice.”

  Alice frowned. “I’m a little worried about Tafel and Mary. Mary’s a bit of an idiot, and Tafel’s the type to get dragged along by idiots’ whims. What if they’re doing something stupid right now?”

  “I’m sure they’ll be fine,” Mr. Skelly said. “The only dangerous thing inside of these forests are rude genies, and that’s only if you make a vague wish.”

  “Baaa.”

  Alice furrowed her brow. “Did one of you just bleat?” she asked the elementals.

  “It was probably Mistle,” Zilphy said with venom in her voice. “She’s a filthy animal.”

  “Excuse me?” Mistle asked, standing up. “Why don’t you say that to my face?”

  Zilphy crossed her arms without standing or turning towards the blue rock. “Sorry, I don’t speak animal.”

  Sheryl wiggled over to Diamant and poked his side. She whispered, “Shouldn’t you do something about those two? Isn’t it your fault in the first place?”

  “Yes, yes, blame me,” Diamant said and rolled his eyes. “It’s always the earth elemental’s fault.” He sighed. “I suppose it’s my fault for being too handsome and having two elementals fall for me.”

  Sheryl’s eyes narrowed. She reached down, dug her sticklike fingers underneath Diamant, and flipped him over in one motion. He shouted, but Sheryl ignored him and wiggled back to her previous spot by Vur’s head.

  “Baaaa!”

  “Someone shut that sheep up!” Stella said, popping out of Vur’s hair.

  “Mistle can do it,” Zilphy said. “Maybe it’s her cousin.”

  “I’ll do it,” Diamant said and righted himself. He stood up and walked past Alice and Mr. Skelly towards the source of the sound. The darkness seemed to swallow him as he walked into the woods. A moment later, he came back out. “Alright. It was a weird sheep that looked like a human, but I shut it up anyway. Happy?”

  “Ye—”

  “Baaa! Baaa!”

  “—s?” Stella tilted her head. “Why does it sound like there are even more now?”

  “What is going on?” Alice asked and climbed to her feet. Bleats filled the air, and the ground shook from the sound. The trees trembled and leaves fell from their branches. Shivers ran down Alice’s spine, and she touched the tiny shield strapped to her wrist. It grew in size until it became a tower shield that she hid behind. She stood on her tiptoes and glanced over the top, peering into the dark woods. “Is it a herd of sheep?”

  “It’s a herd of humanoid sheep,” Diamant said. His rocky face frowned. “Would that still be called a herd? What is a group of humans called anyway? A pack?”

  “That doesn’t really matter right now,” Mr. Skelly said and drew his sword. His eye sockets seemed to glow in the dark. He picked up his helmet with his free hand and donned it, covering his face. “This reminds me of the good ol’ days.”

  “You fought sheep-like men in the good ol’ days?” Alice asked, keeping her eyes on the forest. The bleating was getting louder, and the ground shook even harder. Red, wooly figures emerged, some of them carrying halberds. The ones that didn’t have weapons were carrying branches, and a few were holding stones. “And severely outnumbered at that?”

  “Even worse! We fought men-like sheep,” Mr. Skelly said and laughed. “They were everywhere when we first arrived on that continent after fleeing from the worms. But it didn’t take long to wipe them out. All we needed were a few dogs to round them up.”

  Alice braced herself against her shield and shoved forward. Bleats filled the air as the sheep-like men were bowled over. The sheepmen in the back tripped on the ones in the front, and a few were impaled by the halberds that were lying around. But the wave of sheepmen didn’t stop. Like a red avalanche, they trampled over their fallen and swarmed against Alice and Mr. Skelly. Alice grunted as she was shoved backwards, her feet digging fissures into the ground. “Someone wake Vur up!”

  Diamant nudged Vur a couple of times before shrugging. Then he dissolved into motes of light that sank into Vur’s arm. The brown runes glowed with a bright light, and cracks spread out along the ground from Vur’s fingertips. They snaked past Alice and Mr. Skelly before widening, splitting the earth into a gaping maw that swallowed the front of the flood, bringing relief to the two holding it back.

  “Wake up, Vur!” Zilphy said and pinched Vur’s cheeks. He grumbled a few times before rolling over. “There’s tons of sheep trying to kill us!” She hopped up and down before climbing onto his head. “Wake up. Wakey wakey.” There was still no response. Zilphy scratched her head. “Breakfast is ready?”

  Vur’s eyes fluttered open. “Where? What time is it?”

  Zilphy pointed at the sheep. “Right now, it’s eat-the-sheep-people o’clock.”

  “I don’t eat people,” Vur said and snorted. He wiped away the line of drool leaking out of the corner of his mouth. “They taste bad.”

  “They’re part sheep, so they’ll only taste partly bad,” Zilphy said. “And most importantly, they’re trying to kill us!”

  Vur looked around. He frowned at Sheryl. “Why aren’t you doing anything?”

  Sheryl shrugged. “I’m still injured from being shot in the butt by an arrow.”

  “Oh.” Vur turned towards Mistle. “What about you?”

  “If I help out Diamant, then I’m afraid this jealous witch will kill me while I’m not paying attention,” Mistle said, gesturing towards Zilphy.

  Vur blinked at Zilphy. She shook her fist at Mistle before sticking her tongue out. “And you know it. So stay away from my husband, you adulteress.”

  Vur grabbed Zilphy and Mistle. Then he pressed them against each other, eliciting high-pitched squeals. “You two should stop fighting.”

  “Hello!? Vur! A little help?” Alice shouted. “Where’s that portal that Tafel left behind for us to shout into?”

  “It’s over there,” Vur said and pointed at a nearby patch between two rocks. He crouched over the portal and cleared his throat. “Tafel. Are you there? There’s some sheep things attacking us. Come back when you want.”

  “You don’t sound very urgent!”

  Vur snorted and stood up. “They’re just sheep,” he said, his voice lowering into a growl. His bones cracked, and his skin split apart as scales blossomed along his body. He grew in size, his neck elongating as his torso slumped down. “It doesn’t matter how many of them there are.”

  It didn’t take long for Vur’s polymorph to finish, and when it did, he lumbered towards the wave of sheepmen. They stopped in their tracks and stared at him. The sheepmen at the front of the mob exchanged glances with each other while bleating a few times. They shrugged and pointed their weapons at the dragon before them and charged headfirst into a breath of white icicles that froze them into glistening, red statues.

  “That’s a cheat,” Alice said, shifting her shield to the side to get a better view at the stunned sheepmen. The frozen statues were boiling from within and cracking apart. Bits of reddish ice fell off of them and onto the ground, leaving behind puddles of red water as the statues melted. The sheepmen standing behind their melting companions took a few steps back, their eyes fixated on Vur. He snorted and growled, and the wave of sheepmen moved back by another step in unison.

  Alice frowned. “But you’re right. These things really are pretty weak. What are they supposed t
o be anyways?” Her frown deepened. “And what are we going to do with all of them? Kill them?”

  “What? No!” Mr. Skelly stepped forward. “That’s such a barbaric train of thought. Just because they wanted to kill us first doesn’t mean we have to kill them in return.” He cleared his non-existent throat and stepped towards the sheep-like men. “Baaa!”

  Alice, Vur, and the sheepmen stared at Mr. Skelly. Alice swallowed. “You … can speak sheep?”

  “No,” Mr. Skelly said. “But it was worth a shot.”

  “Baa, you don’t have to, baa, worry. We, baaa, can speak normbaaly.” One sheepman stepped forward, his hands gripping his halberd to his chest. “Let’s, baa, discuss this like civilized, baaaa, beings.”

  ***

  “Why are we running back?” Mary asked. She was walking alongside Tafel, a plate of food in her hands. With every step she took, the ground underneath her shrank, her walking pace keeping up with the sprinting demon beside her. “Can’t we teleport?”

  “If these sheep things are anything like those blood chimeras that I fought in a dungeon, which they seem to be, then they have some anti-magic properties built in,” Tafel said. She took in a deep breath through her nose before continuing to speak, her feet thumping against the ground. A fireball floating ahead of her illuminated her path. “If we enter a portal, and they cancel it before we fully exit the portal, what do you think will happen to us?”

  Mary’s brow furrowed. “Our body ends up in two places at once?”

  “That’s right,” Tafel said. “And that’s why we’re running.”

  “Oh.” Mary munched on her food and swallowed. “Why can’t you use that offensively then? Have something partly enter the portal and then cancel it. Won’t you be able to cut off anyone’s limb like that?”

  “It doesn’t work,” Tafel said. She ducked to avoid a branch and brushed aside a few vines with Chi’Rururp.

  “Why not?”

  Tafel turned her head towards Mary and frowned. “If I told you, would you be able to understand?”

  “There’s no harm in trying,” Mary said. She swallowed and took another bite.

  “I’m in the middle of a sprint! I’ll run out of breath,” Tafel said and took in another deep breath.

  “You need to exercise more,” Mary said with a nod. “So, why can’t you cut off limbs by closing portals? Have you tried?”

  “I have,” Tafel said and grimaced, ignoring the stabbing pain in her side. Why did Mary have to travel so far away from the group? “And it doesn’t work.”

  “But why not?” Mary finished her meal and blinked at the empty plate. “Where do I put this?”

  “Give it here,” Tafel said and grabbed the plate. She opened a portal beside herself and tossed it inside. “You see how slowly the portal closes? If you grabbed the edge of it and pulled, then it’d be open for even longer. It can’t cut anything.”

  Mary furrowed her brow. “Then why don’t we teleport?”

  “Because when you and other anti-magic-loving freaks break my portal, it shatters,” Tafel said. “Space doesn’t slowly mend itself, it destroys the portal completely as if it never opened in the first place.”

  “Then if you create a portal, and I break it, won’t we be able to cut anything?” Mary asked, her eyes lighting up.

  Tafel rolled her eyes. “You can already cut everything.” Her footsteps slowed down until she came to a halt in front of a clearing. Hoofprints covered the muddy ground, the undergrowth having been trampled and uprooted until the forest floor was just a layer of brown. A few trees had fallen, their roots exposed above gaping holes in the earth. Tafel increased the strength of her flames to cast light on a greater portion of the field. “What happened here?”

  “It looks like hundreds of horses ran through,” Mary said and squatted, putting her finger on the ground. “See? Hoofprints.”

  “Clearly, it was the sheep people,” Tafel said. “Vur didn’t sound very urgent, but he wouldn’t have even said anything to us in the first place if there wasn’t a problem.” She stepped past Mary and resumed her sprint, running on the destroyed forest floor. The sea of unearthed soil and overturned trees filled her vision. She had to turn her head all the way to the right or left to see any upright trees in the forest. “Just how many of them were there?”

  “Could this be the ritual that the empire was preparing?” Mary asked. “They sacrificed their citizens and turned them into sheep-human chimeras. But why sheep? Are sheep strong? Why not wolves?”

  “I can’t even fathom a reason to sacrifice that many people,” Tafel said and shook her head. She tripped over the lip of a particularly deep hole, but Mary caught her arm and righted her before she fell. “Thanks. Maybe sheep were the only animals they had to work with?”

  Mary released Tafel and gave her a small smile. “I just hope they’re kicking Vur’s butt,” Mary said. “He’s too arrogant.”

  “Unless sheep can fly, I don’t think they’ll ever win against Vur,” Tafel said. “You won’t believe how great of an advantage being able to fly is unless you’ve flown yourself.”

  Mary pouted. “When I find a genie, I’m going to wish I knew how to fly.”

  “About that,” Tafel said. The two were still traversing the ruined forest with no end of the muddy fields in sight. “Can genies really grant wishes just like that? Isn’t that a bit too fantastical? There has to be some kind of cost, right? Otherwise, wouldn’t the demand for genies become so high that there wouldn’t be any more?”

  Mary scratched her head and blinked at Tafel. “Can you say that again but slower?”

  “Right,” Tafel said. “I forgot that you were the person who thought raising taxes would make your people happier.”

  “At least I don’t turn my people into sheep,” Mary said and pursed her lips. “I think that makes me a good empress.” Her eyes lit up, and she grabbed Tafel’s arm, bringing the demon to a sudden halt. “Look. Ahead.”

  Tafel grunted and rubbed her shoulder, her face contorting in pain. She squinted at the path in front of herself. There were still quite a few trees that were standing, but underneath them, there was a sea of red. The edges of the sea seemed to have noticed the light coming from her flames, and it rippled as the sheepmen turned around to stare at her.

  “That’s a lot,” Mary said. She leaned over and took Chi’Rururp out of Tafel’s hands. “I’ll make quick work out of them.” She took in a deep breath and placed Chi’Rururp’s blade against her wrist. A green liquid leaked out of the sword’s edge, causing Mary to wince and pull her arm back. She wiped away the acid and slapped the flat portion of Chi’Rururp’s blade. “Don’t do that.”

  “Sorry….”

  “Don’t slap my sword,” Tafel said, frowning at Mary.

  “It was its fault!” Mary bit her lower lip and pressed her wrist against Chi’Rururp’s edge again.

  As she was about to draw blood, a high-pitched voice echoed through the night, “Baaa! Great leader! We, baaa, found them! The great leader’s, baaa, wives, baa, are here!”

  Mary froze, ignoring the green liquid trailing down her wrist to her fingertips. “They can speak?”

  “Great leader?” Tafel’s eyes widened. “Wives!? What do you mean wives!? There’s only one wife!”

  28

  Vur sat cross-legged on top of a boulder. Leaning against the boulder, Alice and Mr. Skelly were sitting with their backs straight, their arms crossed over their chests. Thousands of sheepmen surrounded them, kneeling in a circle. Ahead of Vur, the sea of sheepmen parted by shuffling to the sides without standing, and Tafel and Mary came into view, led by an entourage of halberd-wielding sheepmen.

  “Alright, Vur,” Tafel said, her voice hiding a sigh. “What’s going on?”

  “These sheepmen were on a mission to kill a dragon, but once they saw how strong I was, they gave up and decided to become my followers instead,” Vur said. “I think I’m going to put them in Konigreich. That way, Auntie can keep an eye on t
hem.”

  “On a mission to kill a dragon?” Tafel asked. “And they gave up? Just like that?”

  “Well, they are sheep,” Alice said and shrugged. “If you can convince one of them, the rest follow. It’s funny actually.”

  Tafel glared at Alice before redirecting her gaze onto Vur. “Shouldn’t you be more upset at them for wanting to kill a dragon?”

  Vur scratched his head. “You can’t help what you want,” he said. “It’s how you act on what you want that determines whether or not you’re a bad person.” Vur nodded, and the sheepmen nodded with him, their heads bobbing up and down like waves in a red ocean.

  Tafel blinked. Then she brought her hands up to her eyes and rubbed them with her fingers. She let out a breath as she lowered her arms and took another look at Vur. She blinked again before frowning. “Vur? Did something happen to you while I was gone?”

  “I became the ruler of these sheepmen?”

  “Other than that?”

  Vur tilted his head. “No. Why?”

  Tafel bit her lower lip. “It’s just that … you said something quite uncharacteristic of yourself,” she muttered. Wind whistled as she took in a deep breath. “Actually, never mind. It’s nothing. So, you’re treating these sheep things…, err, people, these sheep people as your subjects now? Is that a good idea? Do you even know what they eat?”

  Vur blinked. He turned his head towards a sheepman with prominent horns that curled like a ram’s. “What do you eat?”

  The sheepman bleated and cleared his throat. “Grass.”

  Vur nodded at the sheepman and turned his head back towards Tafel. “They eat grass.”

  “Okay,” Tafel said and held up a fist. She extended her pointer finger. “Their mission in life is to kill a dragon.” She raised her middle finger. “They follow strong people.” She raised her ring finger. “And they eat grass.” Her three raised fingers wiggled as she moved her hand towards Vur. “What else do you know about them other than these three things? You can’t just assimilate new citizens like this.”