Though what she saw was odd, it did not scare her or further worry her in any way. The envelope contained about fifteen A4 sheets of paper with news articles by Tyler attached on either side. She looked through them, seeing all different kinds of stories but the one thing she did notice was that they were all stories from out of State, somewhere farther afield than his usual beat. She couldn’t put a thread to the stories, and she didn’t know why they were here. Sarah shoved them back into the envelope and pushed them away. She didn’t have the head space for this right now. She would ask Tyler later why he’d sent them to her.
As she put the envelope down her eyes cast over the low partition between her desk and that of Delgado’s. She got up and went around to his side and looked down. A tearful smile came to her face when she saw how neat and tidy his side was. It was just like him, his clothes always clean and pressed, his reports clear and eligible in his flawless penmanship. She’d never fully noticed his fastidiousness when he was alive and now it was all she could see on looking at his cleared desk.
She sat down in his seat and leaned back, closing her eyes. There was no lingering aroma of his cologne or any sense of him at all. The leather smell, like a chair yet to be used was all that assailed her nostrils. Tears stung her eyes and forced her to open them and Sarah wiped at her eyes with her sleeve.
“Why didn’t you tell me what you were doing, you asshole,” she whispered harshly. “We could have brought him together; you could still have all the glory.” She knew this wasn’t fully fair on Delgado, but she was angry, and it felt like a release to say these things even if only for a second. Leaning forward, Sarah put her head on his desk and cried for a time, each of her sobs punctuated with her reprimand of ‘Asshole.’
This only stopped when she heard the whirring of the elevator as someone was on their way up to the office. She scrambled to her own side of the desk and wiped her eyes and cheeks as fast as she could trying to make it look like she hadn’t been crying.
The doors opened and the ASAIC Daniels stepped out. He looked at her and said,
“Brightwater, get the hell out of here until after the funeral.” He was not angry, but he didn’t engage her any further than that, instead he walked to his office went inside and shut the door behind him. Sarah appreciated this; it was normal.
Getting up, she grabbed a few files from the desk and then remembered the post. She picked this up too and gathered it all in her arm. She was just about to leave when she saw the file Tyler had sent her. She grabbed that too. She would have to ask him later what it was all about. Sarah left the office then and made it back to her car without talking to anyone she knew well. She could feel the sad eyes of other agents and tech staff as she passed. They might not know her personally, but they did know what she was going through, and what she had already gone through with another partner. She couldn’t imagine anyone ever wanting that job again. Sarah was going to have a name now for bad luck that would carry on through her career, she just knew it.
Chapter 32
Sarah’s call to him wasn't completely unexpected. He knew she would be hurting after Delgado’s death. There was nothing romantic in it, but Tyler knew she felt Delgado was a good man and this certainly wasn’t a death she would have felt befitted him. She had asked to come over, for a quiet place to work and be and of course Tyler had said yes.
As he waited for her, Tyler went out to sit by the river and contemplate for a while. When she called, the pain in her voice, the image of her tears did something to him that had never happened before. He felt sorry, or perhaps it was guilt, he wasn’t sure as these were things he’d never actually felt before. Not so long as he could recall at least. For so many years he’d found a way to emulate these feelings, to show them to other people but inside him he’d never felt it. Until now.
Tyler knew it wasn’t because Delgado was a good man, in their way he was sure all of his victims after his first were good people. No, this was because of how he’d made Sarah feel. He could see that now. He looked at the rushing water, the dark falling over the land and it seemed like he was looking at his own life, moving fast but the direction, the end point uncertain. Now he’d broken the heart of the one person he’d set out to help in all of this.
Had that been true though? Hadn’t he himself always been the one he was looking out for. Sarah had been a means to an end. And yet..
What? What was it he was thinking? He didn’t love her, he wasn’t capable of that, but there was something he couldn't explain, something protective that couldn't be ignored. Tyler sighed; whatever it was it was unwelcome in his life.
It was full dark when Sarah arrived and when he greeted her at the porch she looked worse than he’d ever seen her before. Her eyes were deep hollows, and her cheeks were tearstained. She carried some files in her arms but though they were only thin and paper she looked like she didn’t have the strength to hold them for long. He walked to her and took them.
“None of this is your fault,” was the first thing he said to her. She let the files go and looked into his face as he said this but didn’t seem to have any response to it. They went inside and Tyler put the files down on the kitchen island. Sarah went to the window to the rear of the house and looked outside. She wouldn't be able to see anything, but the sound of the river would reach her ears and he felt perhaps that was something for her.
“Has there been any update on the mechanic?” Tyler asked, knowing full well that there would not be. No one would ever see ‘Lou’ again.
“They searched his house but found nothing. It was like he only used the place to sleep and eat and watch TV.” Sarah replied. She was looking at him through his reflection on the glass of the window.
“He’s disappeared?”
“Somehow,” Sarah said, turning to face him now. There was a look of hopeless incredulity on her face that sank inside Tyler. He went to her and she dropped her head into his chest and sobbed. “It feels like we chase and chase these people and they never get justice,” she groaned. Tyler squeezed her and ran his hand over the back of her head.
“You feel that way now because you’re in mourning, trauma even. The truth is most of the killers do get caught and very early in their runs thanks to people like you,” he said.
“Why did he have to die,” she said but there was no hint of a question in it.
“He wanted to protect people, children and bring closure to the victim’s families.”
“He should have come to me, or anyone and he’d still be alive,” she cried, shaking her head violently in dismay.
“He’s a cop underneath just like you are, Sarah, he didn’t know if he was dealing with a crank or false claim. It would have been a lot of wasted hours if he’d asked someone to come with him and it turned out to be nothing. I just guess he didn’t think Tempus would be so small and he’d be alone in a shed with a killer.”
“Even that is bugging me,” Sarah said, taking a step back so she could look at Tyler’s face. “Why did he get himself into that position?”
“I don’t know,” Tyler shook his head. “Maybe he felt the mechanic was not his man after all, or maybe he wasn’t but he felt under pressure about something else he’d done and lashed out, who knows why killers do these things?” Sarah had no reply to this, and she looked back out the window into the darkness again.
Tyler went to the kitchen and poured a whiskey for each of them.
“Is this the Red Breast?” she asked of the whiskey as she took the glass from him.
“Nothing else,” Tyler smiled at her. They went to the couch and Tyler listened while Sarah talked about Delgado. He knew this kind of fond reminiscing always helped grieving people. He had no idea why, but he guessed it had something to do with perhaps feeling that the person was still alive as the images of the things they did and said ran through the survivors mind. They drank some more and talked some more and then ended up in bed making love as had happened before.
In the morning, Tyler left Sarah a
sleep while he went out for a run in the forest. His pace was well down on usual and at one point he felt the rise of the whiskey and thought he was going to vomit. He’d needed to get out of the house though. The feelings Sarah was forcing up inside of him were unsettling and made his mind go to strange places in both the past and the future. Who might he have been, who could he be? He stopped running again and shook his head. He couldn't be anyone other than who he was, it was the same for everyone surely?
When he got back to the house, he could smell in the air that Sarah had showered and made coffee.
“I was waiting for you to get back,” she said on seeing him come into the living room.
“What’s up?” he asked, pretending to be more out of breath than he really was.
“Nothing, I’m going back home to get ready for the funeral,” Sarah said. Tyler looked at her and it seemed that some kind of initial acceptance was evident in her now, a marked change from when she arrived last night.
“Okay, I’ll see you there,” he said. Sarah was heading for the door when she turned and said,
“Did you send me a bunch of your old articles in the mail?” Tyler looked at her, perplexed,
“No.”
“Oh, that’s weird. I got an envelope with some of your articles stuck to paper. They went back a long time too,” she said.
“Which articles?” Tyler asked, feeling fear grow inside of him.
“I have it here,” she said, putting down the files and taking up the envelope and handing it to him. Tyler opened it and pulled out the sheets. He looked at the stories and he knew at once what was going on.
“Any idea what this might be about?” he asked her, hoping against everything that he was not going to have to kill her.
“No,” she replied, “I was hoping you’d answer that for me.” He looked down at the pages again and shook his head.
“No, sorry,” he said, putting the pages back in the envelope and placing it on the counter. He hoped she would leave it there, forget about it but she took a couple of steps towards it and picked it up again and put it back with the rest of her stuff.
“I’m sure we'll figure it out soon enough,” she said. That was what Tyler feared.
Chapter 33
As soon as her car was out of earshot of the house Tyler let out a howl of anguish and dropped to his knees with the enormity of it all. His fists pounded on the floor before he got up and started pulling the place apart, sending things flying as he went.
“Fuuuuuuucccccccckkkkkk!” he screamed. It had happened, it had finally happened. How long would it be before Sarah figured out what message the articles hid? Not too long at all was Tyler’s guess. Once she saw all the dates and they seemed familiar to her she would start to see all the articles were from out of state around the time of murders that had been attributed to the ‘Birdwatcher'. They would put him within reasonable distance of them all. Spalding had screwed him over and now Tyler had only two options. Give himself up or run. He certainly wasn’t going to give himself up.
This was Spalding’s revenge for Tyler finding out where he was. He was afraid of Tyler now, had underestimated him. Little did he know he was still underestimating him, and Tyler would have the last laugh. Only the pace had to be picked up now. Thankfully, Delgado’s funeral would occupy Sarah’s mind for now and keep her senses dulled until he could get away, but it could be any day now when she found out who he really was. She was going to be devastated.
Tyler stopped moving around the house then as a new thought came to him- She would think he’d been working with Spalding all along. Was there any way he was going to be able to convince her otherwise? It didn’t seem likely. He and Sarah were never going to see one another again.
Never again. The idea sickened him, brought a welling of horror inside of him he would never have thought possible. What had she done to him? There was no time to think about that now, he had to get going. His freedom was no longer a given. From now on everything he did was going to have to be in the shadows. His network would get him so far but once it was made public who he really was that too would fall apart.
Thankfully, Tyler had made some preparations for this. There was always the chance some freak accident could reveal his crimes and with that in mind he had plenty of cash stored in various places around the country. He had fake IDs, fake passports and fake social media accounts and email addresses for cloud storage. He had various vehicles in lockups in five states and was capable of riding a motorcycle or driving for up to twelve hours without much strain.
He packed a rucksack with some clothes and non-perishable foods from the fridge and then went to his computer desk. There he saved the manuscript and research for his book to a flash drive; it wouldn't be published now, but if he was arrested he might get it out there someday as it wasn’t his own crimes he wrote about and hence could make money on it.
Tyler left his one registered phone on the table and left his home for the last time. He would miss this place, but he was sure he would find somewhere just as nice wherever he ended up. For now, he was thinking of the mountains of Canada, but his initial run would be to Washington State. That was far enough away to start over and plan his new life without leaving the country.
Going to a shed about fifty feet from his house, Tyler wheeled out a motorcycle no one in the world knew he had and set off for Florida by road, from where he would get a flight under his assumed name and fly to Tacoma, Washington where he would think about his next move. He didn’t look back at the house as he left but the thought crossed his mind that perhaps it was best he’d never gotten those dogs he was thinking of. It wouldn't be fair to leave them to fend for themselves like this.
For the first time, speeding along these country roads on a motorbike did not feel good to him. All he could think about was what he was losing, what had to be left behind. All the hard work he’d done to create the Tyler Ford that everyone knew undone in one moment of petty revenge. Well, Spalding wasn’t the only one interested in petty revenge. He would rue the day he ever heard of Tyler Ford.
Through his anger came the sadness of loss as he imagined the flesh of Sarah’s body pressed to his lips. A feeling he would never experience again. Not seeing her was cutting him up most of all. Again he had to wonder how she’d been able to push herself in under his skin, how he’d developed a need for her without ever knowing it himself. Not once had he thought she was anything more to him than any other plaything he’d had in his life, but now he knew different. Not seeing her was going to be the hardest thing of all in his new life.
At least he was not going to see her face when she found out who he really was. He just hoped she was going to be strong enough to get through it all. Would this be the straw that broke the camel’s back? Especially as it came so hot on the heels of Delgado’s murder. It was possible. It was also possible Spalding knew enough about what Tyler and Sarah were up to, including in his bed, that he might let the FBI know what he knew and thus ruin her career in the process. She was already going to be known as something of black widow for partners at the FBI but if she had been sleeping with a serial killer while also feeding him information and giving him access to sensitive sites and information that would be the end of her for sure. And that was before they found out she knew Tyler had Carson Lemond and how he really came to be in that warehouse where he died.
What a mess. How could she survive it?
Chapter 34
The weather stayed bright for the funeral of Pedro Delgado and Sarah felt that was fitting. His estranged wife Angela was there and if her level of grief was anything to go by, Delgado might have been right to hold out hope of a reunion. Had he stayed alive of course. Sarah wanted to be professional and not cry at the funeral, but it got to her and though she didn’t break down, there was a constant invisible stream of tears running from her eyes. She dabbed at the corners every now and then when she felt everyone's attention taken up by a part of the service.
SAIC Bobrick spoke very w
ell about the fallen agent and his old partner Matt Ivory talked with great emotion about the kind of person Delgado was. Sarah saw that the mothers of the slain children in the very case Delgado had died investigating had come all this way as a show of respect for the man who'd fought tirelessly to catch the murderer.
It was strange to see the life he had before Sarah knew him and it made her happy that he was so well liked and respected for his work and for who he was. As the service went on, Sarah took a few quick glances around the church. She knew she was looking for Tyler but there was also a gnawing fear that the killer, or Spalding could be here just to get the thrill of it. There was no sign of any of those people.
As the ceremony prepared to move from the church to the grave, Sarah felt sure Tyler would have made himself visible so he could give her a nod of support or something but when he was nowhere to be seen, she began to feel a little apprehensive. Could something have happened to him? It was more likely he’d been stuck in traffic, but fear was always at the heart of everything now in her life. She got to her car and sent him a message asking if he was going to be at the grave?
By the time she got there, there had been no answer. She looked around on getting out of her car and still no sign. Her eyes did meet those of Detective Freeman, however. The older man nodded respectfully and then looked back to the grave with his head bowed. It was nice to see him here, Sarah thought. She wondered had he made any more progress on the Mansion Murders case. Perhaps they would get to talk later about it.
Tears welled in her eyes as the coffin was lowered into the grave. Sarah felt a hand grip her shoulder and squeeze. She turned a little and saw it was Daniels beside her. He didn’t say anything and then he let go. Perhaps he didn’t hate her after all.
When the full service was over, Sarah talked for a time with her superiors and some of the other agents from the Academy. Freeman hung around for a time, but she never got the chance to talk to him. When it was all over and she went back to her car, she was very surprised that Tyler had not been in attendance. She checked her phone and there was no return message to her own. She dialed his number.
A Clamour of Rooks (The Birdwatcher Series Book 4) Page 13
