by Ivy McAdams
“What? They do. Better she knows now, right?”
One of the other females speaks and it’s foreign. She’s one of the true Kutarians. Kaami.
“What’d she say?” I ask.
“She suggests you take it easy,” Gemma says. “Strange food could do a nasty number on your stomach.”
I grimace down at my plate. That’s what I’ve been worried about.
“But I’m sure you’ll be fine.” Gemma rests a big hand on my shoulder. “Best to just take the leap, right? We’re not going anywhere and you’ll have to eat.”
I let out a long breath. That’s right. We’re stuck here.
With our base demolished and all the other humans that were there gone—dead as far as we know—there isn’t much hope of getting out of here. The next space ship isn’t due for a couple months at the earliest. If they come at all. We don’t know if they received distressed signals and changed their course or not.
We’re in the dark. On our own.
At least the others seem like they’ve managed to cope. Well, most of them. One of the human Kutarians hugs herself a lot and looks twitchy. I’m not too sure she’s keen on being in an alien body, but at least she’s surviving.
I, on the other hand, feel puny and unsure of myself. How am I even going to eat this stuff with my oxygen mask strapped to my face?
I don't know about the trade-off though. I'm not hopping up and down to become some wacky giant alien chick, but am I going to survive like this?
Dead doesn’t seem like an exciting alternative.
“You’re right,” I say. “All I can do is try it.”
I study the natural Kutarian females as I gather the courage to eat. If I remember all the stories I’ve been fed so far, they were two of just three women left in the village. All the others were destroyed by the nasty bug aliens, which apparently are currently the mortal enemies of the Kutarians.
I can see why.
While most of the women were killed, a dozen were paralyzed somehow. Their brains were wiped out, leaving their bodies as empty shells. Their super all-powerful shaman man figured out how to move us into the giant bodies.
Or at least some of us.
I’m holding out my Yelp review on that guy.
In the meantime, survival wins.
With a deep breath for courage, I slide the oxygen mask off my face.
The cool air on my skin feels great, but it’s a little terrifying having the mask off. Thankfully the air isn’t poisonous. It just doesn’t have the oxygen I need.
Although it does have what the tour guide back at the base described as some “unknown metal element” in it that burns my throat almost immediately. I push the air out through my nose, desperate to get it out of my body. It pinpricks the delicate skin in my nostrils as well and my eyes tear up.
I scramble to put the mask back on as Gemma rubs my back.
“Damn, that looks painful,” she murmurs.
Everyone is looking at me and I wipe at my eyes, trying to slow my breath as I bring in fresher air. It’s not perfectly clean, but it’s filtered enough not to burn, and the oddly shaped green gourd attached to my mask converts some of the air to oxygen.
“It pretty much sucked, yeah,” I cough, sticking a finger in the mask and wiping at the underside of my nose.
No blood.
But let’s not try that again.
“Looks like you’re going to have to practice eating,” Gemma says. “Ever had a tea party underwater?”
I lift a brow.
“Pinch your nose and take a bite.”
I nod, resigning myself that eating is going to suck from now on.
Guess I’ll lose those ten pounds I’d been wanting to.
The second Kutarian female leans over and speaks. Trinity translates.
“Waella says your body won’t accept the lofo again for another few days. It needs rest.”
“The what?”
“The Shaman used lofo on us,” Gemma says. “An herb with some sort of super out-of-body shit powers. But you can’t use it again yet.”
“Do I want to use it again?” I stare at her skeptically.
She sits back, glancing around at her companions.
Suddenly I feel quite on the outside of their group. The stranger.
“That’s up to you,” she says softly, though her smile is a little sad. “I hate to see you suffer though.”
“It’s just a little inconvenient for dinner time,” I say, lifting my mask and taking a bite of the potato thing. I slide the equipment back down to chew. The vegetable is starchy and has an interesting spice to it. “But changing into a new body is a huge decision, right? No need to go jumping into it because of a little inconvenience.”
She nods slowly, not giving me a smile or a frown.
I’m not sure how to read her. It feels like her words are genuine. She wants me to choose. But it’s been obvious from the beginning what she wants my choice to be.
I can’t blame her I guess. If I was an alien and happy here, I’d want her to be too.
But that’s also the weirdest fucking sentence I’ve ever thought.
Aliens? She wants us to be aliens?
Gemma may be a few sandwiches short of a picnic now.
My heart thumps as I look away, trying to keep the panic from my eyes.
How is everyone okay with this?
I suppose coming to terms with being stranded on this planet is better than freaking out. At least we have food and a place to live. We could be out here alone, just seven lonely human women with no chance for survival.
Even being seven lonely giant aliens would be better odds.
Maybe it is a more strategic move.
Bigger, stronger bodies. No more oxygen mask.
I can see the allure.
But I’m still coming to terms with the being stranded on another planet part. I can’t handle everything at once.
We can readdress the whole turning into an alien another day.
The women fall into conversation around me, all in Alienese, of course, and I try to focus on my food. Because it needs focus. Mask off, take a bite, mask on. And no breathing in between.
It’s hard work. Am I burning more calories than I’m bringing in?
Maybe it’s not that crazy, but it is tedious.
When I’m halfway through my platter, and my stomach is beginning to hurt, I put it aside.
Amid the talking, I lean on Gemma's arm and whisper. "Is it scary?"
She looks down at me with big purple eyes. “What?”
“All of it. Swapping over. Being in a completely new body. And, you know, being an alien’s mate.”
She smiles. “It was in the beginning. I was scared shitless.”
Oh, thank the Lord.
“I was the first to wake up. Of course I was afraid. I actually made a big fuss over it. You know, stole some lofo, tried to switch myself back.” She chuckles and I stare.
Damn. I can’t imagine how freaked out and angry I’d be in her shoes. Mental note: I may feel out of place now, but I could have woken up an alien and that’d be fucked up.
Although Gemma doesn't seem to mind a bit now.
“Switching back didn’t work?” I whisper.
She shrugs a little. “It did. I left my body, but when I was finally in the moment, I realized I couldn’t lose Kovak.”
I blink at her, drawn in by her words. She stayed...for her alien?
It’s beautiful and weird. I’m torn on whether I should be happy for her or think she’s batshit crazy.
I’ll settle for somewhere in between.
A delusional crazypants living the life. Good for her.
When her eyes lift above mine and light up, I can only imagine she’s seen this dashing love of her life.
I hear his voice before I turn around.
Kovak moves up behind our circle of ladies and leans over to plant a kiss on Gemma’s lips. They look so human and alien at the same time. It’s a kiss like an
y other I’ve seen on Earth, but with their bright silver skin and pointed ears, they look out of this world.
Or at least the world in my head.
Gemma bumps me with her hip as she slides down the log we’re perched on and makes room for Kovak. I nearly go flying, but I manage to shimmy farther away. I guess we’ve got to make room for giant alien asses around here.
“Kovak says he hopes you’re enjoying your dinner,” Gemma says with a smile.
My stomach knots a little and I guess I take back the comment about his big ass. I give him a polite smile. “Thank you.”
I peer over my shoulder and glance down the path Kovak came down. A few more warriors trickle into the community space. One particularly sturdy fellow that’s easy on the eyes is among them.
“You want to see if he’ll eat with us?” Gemma whispers over my shoulder.
I straighten up, fingers clenching my knees. “What? I didn’t—”
She chuckles, her nose wrinkling, and fuck it, I know I’m caught.
“We can go ask,” she offers again. “We all eat together anyway. It’s no big deal. But if you want him close enough to talk to him…”
I won’t deny that having the warrior closer is tempting. I’d like to be close enough for a proper greeting. A wave.
Because I can’t exactly talk to him. Not by myself.
But she said we.
My heart patters in my chest. I've never been that great going up and talking to guys. Not speaking the same language definitely snatches a ball from my court. Strangely enough, I still want to do it.
I get up and step out of our circle. Gemma follows. She makes excited noises in her throat like some overgrown gerbil. I do my best to ignore her and prep myself.
It’s just like asking him to sit by me in the lunchroom. Not a date. No big deal.
When he glances in my direction, his feet stop. The other warriors leave him behind and head to the food set out around the fire pits. He watches us approach silently. His eyes are even greener under the soft lights in the tree canopy above us.
Gemma speaks a greeting from behind me as we near him.
He glances at her with a nod and speaks with a serious tone before looking back to me.
Gemma clears her throat in a not-so-subtle manner. “He hopes you’re fairing well.”
She gives me a small nudge in the back. I stumble a step forward and put my hands on my hips, unsure of what to do with them. Did she just give me a high school talk to that guy now, loser push?
“Hey, Drek. We’re eating back here,” I say, motioning over my shoulder with my thumb. “All the women. Well, and Kovak. It’s not just a chick thing. I mean…” I sound nuttier than a fruitcake. Can I get Gemma to translate me into someone cooler? I bite at the edge of my lip. “Want to join us?”
Of course not. Who would accept an invitation like that?
As Gemma speaks the words, my fingers pinch into my sides and I give Drek the most normal smile I can muster. He watches me, eyes flitting down to my lip once or twice before I realize I’m still biting it.
What in the hell is going on with me?
She takes forever to finish speaking, and his eyes never move. His face and his mouth are hardened on his stoic face. If it didn’t look so good that way, I’d be offended he wasn’t reacting a little more.
When she stops, he remains silent for a moment more.
Dammit. He does think I’m insane.
He grunts and mumbles a few words. I hold my breath as Gemma speaks them back to me.
“He’s on duty and can’t leave his post right now.”
“On duty? What does that mean?” I ask.
“He’s on inner patrol. Watches over the circle during meals to keep an eye out for any danger.”
A sinking feeling weighs on me. “Is it that dangerous here?”
"Ever since the stagni attacks, they take no chances."
I fight the grimace that threatens and give Drek a tight-lipped smile. So much for that embarrassing display. I nod my head once as I step back, pushing Gemma out of my way. She complies and I wish I could run back to our spot without turning my back on him.
Unsure whether to keep my mouth shut or fill the silence, I clear my throat and murmur, “Well, ah, enjoy your evening then.”
I’m backpedaling when he lifts his chin in my direction and speaks a string with eyes that appear almost warm.
Gemma smiles as she wraps an arm around my shoulder and escorts me away.
“What did he say?” I hiss as I let her push me along.
“I appreciate the invite, red flower,” she translates directly. “Do not be shy to ask again another day.”
My fingers drift up to my fiery locks, smoothing out some ringlets as I glance back over my shoulder. Drek’s dark eyes are still trained on me and an excited buzz settles in my stomach as Gemma leads me back to our circle.
Chapter 4
Eva
A horrible squawking sound pulls me out of a dead sleep and I scream as I topple off my bed and into the dirt.
Is my alarm clock set to Giant Macaw?
My muscles are spazzing and my hand trembles as I reach for the edge of my four-post cot and adjust the mask on my face. It was a decent trip down to the ground because I'm living in the land of the giants.
I rub at the ache in the front of my forehead as I peer around the big, open tent where I spent the night. There are beds situated in rows on either side of the room. Many of them are still contain sleeping Kutarian women.
Or at least they had been sleeping. There are many drowsy and annoyed eyes peering at me now.
“That’s just the levadon,” the closest one grumbles. “They do that every morning.”
“They have dinosaur roosters?” I croak with a gravelly voice.
The girl rolls her eyes with a scoff, and I hate that I have no idea who she is. A few of the female Kutarians still look the same to me right now.
But if I can tell a hundred goats apart on the farm by their faces and markings alone, I can learn who everyone around here is too.
Jade is up and dressed already—if we want to call the knee-length sarong and leather bikini-looking top fully dressed—and walks down the center aisle of the room toward me. Her black hair is plaited along the sides of her head and brought together in a long braid down her back.
She smiles and chuckles at my exchange with my bed neighbor as she approaches.
“Don’t mind, Ruth. She’s not a morning person.” Jade sits on the edge of my bed.
The stranger next to us frowns and pulls the furs layered on top of her up over her head.
“Did you sleep well?” Jade asks.
I pull myself up onto the bed to sit beside her. It’s a sturdy frame of logs lashed together in the corners. I’m not sure what the bedding is made of but it’s comfortable, especially laying sandwiched between the thick layer of soft furs.
After dinner last night, Gemma showed me to my spot in the guest tent, where all the single Kutarian females were staying until further notice.
Thankfully, the bed was quite comfortable. Until I ended up on the floor this morning.
“Slept like a rock,” I say. “Just didn’t know we had a morning alarm.”
“They are rather loud the first day or two,” Jade says. “You’ll get used to it.”
I peer around the room as the other women crawl out of bed to start their day. All but my neighbor, of course.
“How long have ya’ll been awake? Or, you know, swapped?”
“Just a few days. Four for me and Ruth here. I think those two woke up a couple days before you.”
“If I didn’t even make the switch into the other body, why was I out so long?”
Jade lifts a shoulder. “Maybe you got lost out there.”
Out there? What kinda freaky shit is that?
My voice trembles a tad when I answer. “Out where?”
“As far as I know, Gemma is the only one that remembers seeing it. Being in the sp
irit world where we go to make the swap. One of the aliens told her a spirit can get lost out there trying to find a body.”
I grimace and fight off the encroaching cold of a shudder.
“Glad you made it back one way or another,” Jade says with a grin, clapping me on the back with her big hand.
“Well, hell, me too.”
Her grin widens, then she looks to the doorway. “I think Gemma put in a drink request for you this morning.”
I follow her eyes to see a large form stepping in through the flap. Although it takes a moment for my eyes to refocus after the flash of sunlight, I already know who it is. I’m not sure how, but I know it’s him.
Drek walks through the tents, drawing eyes of many of the ladies making their beds. He holds a steaming cup in his hands and he’s watching me.
What the hell kind of room service is this?
Can I request it again tomorrow?
“Thank you,” I murmur to Jade, my focus more on Drek’s face than the cup.
Today, he’s not the strong, silent warrior waiting for his leader to issue an order. Or standing guard at the dinner circle. Or even the worried guy down in the dinosaur pit.
Today, he’s placid.
When his mouth relaxes into what I’d almost call a smile, tiny butterflies take flight in my stomach.
Damn Gemma sending him in here.
I love her.
He hands the cup over and I take the big bowl into my hands.
Please be coffee.
I lower my head to see if I can pull the aroma in through my oxygen mask.
It’s a dark purple but has the same rich smell of coffee, with an extra fruity edge to it.
“What is this?”
Jade laughs. "I don't know for sure. Something like coffee. Maybe tea."
I look at her, then up at Drek.
He speaks, his deep voice rolling through me like a warm wave.
I don’t know what the hell he’s saying, but he can say it all day long.
“Morning tea,” Jade translates.
I hesitate a moment more while Drek watches silently. Waiting.
Then I slide the mask from my face and bring the big cup to my lips. It’s warm but not hot. It doesn’t take like grapes or coffee. More like a blueberry muffin smoothie, but thin like tea.
