Walking up to Adam, I smiled as he kissed me on the cheek and led me into the pub. ‘You look great by the way. Do you want to get a table outside? I’ll bring us out some drinks,’ he suggested. I agreed and walked on into the beer garden, relieved that no one else we knew was out there.
I was replaying Beth’s words when Adam reappeared. His eyes lit up when he saw me. I felt really bad that he liked me so much more than I liked him. It was weird. Usually, I would have enjoyed the attention and I would have just gone with the little bit of attraction I felt towards him. I would have been up for a fun fling with him. But now, I held back. Why did it feel different this time?
‘I needed this. My boss was such a dick today,’ Adam said after he’d taken a long gulp of has beer.
I sipped my wine eagerly, hoping it would put me in a better frame of mind. ‘I don’t actually know where you work?’
‘I’m an estate agent,’ he said. ‘Yeah, I don’t usually volunteer that information,’ he joked. ‘That’s why I wanted to see inside the Hall finally. We always wonder if the family will ever sell the place.’
‘Highly unlikely,’ I replied. ‘They love it. It’s a special house so I can see why. Beth has so many money-making ideas on the go, I think they will be just fine.’ I wondered how Izzy would feel once the house was passed down to her. Maybe she’d create an even bigger library then. That idea made me smile into my wine glass. ‘Why was your boss such a dick then?’
Adam launched into the full story – basically, his boss came down hard on them for missing the weekly sales target and ranted at them for half an hour. ‘What annoys me is he made no sales this week but I did.’ He shrugged. ‘But what is life without a manager to moan about, right?’
I nodded along. That had always been the case for me too, but I liked Beth too much to feel that way about her. I told him all about Hamish in Glasgow. ‘Which is why I ended up in Glendale.’
‘Well I’m glad you escaped him,’ he said. ‘And found your way here.’ He smiled at me. He really was sweet. I felt bad for my lack of enthusiasm towards him being anything other than a friend. He went to the bar to refill our glasses and, after he left, the gate to the garden opened and in walked Lorna, Alastair, Glen and Cameron. As ever, my heart sped up at the sight of him, and when our eyes locked he smiled and made me wonder if his had done exactly the same. Adam returned then and sat down before seeing them. They all stared. It was obvious we were having a drink alone and no one knew quite what to do. I felt my cheeks turn pink as Cameron clocked Adam, and I wasn’t sure why I felt so uncomfortable. I wasn’t doing anything wrong, but it somehow felt like I was.
‘I thought we’d be safe,’ Adam said in a low voice as they made their way over to us. ‘We never come here on a Wednesday if it’s not quiz night. I’m sorry.’
‘It’s fine,’ I reassured him before they reached us.
‘Hey you two,’ Glen said brightly. ‘Mind if we join you?’
‘Glen, they might want to be alone,’ Lorna said quickly, flashing her brother an apologetic smile.
‘We wouldn’t want to intrude,’ Cameron said, hanging back. I couldn’t read his expression or his tone. We had agreed to just be friends so I was confused by the animosity I sensed. But I was also a little bit pleased by it, annoyingly.
‘No worries, come and join us,’ Adam said with his usual good humour. Under the table his foot brushed my leg. I moved away under the pretence of shifting to make room for Lorna.
‘I’ll get the drinks,’ Cameron said.
‘I need the loo,’ I said watching as he walked away. I hurried after him. ‘Adam just wanted to come for a drink. It’s not a date…’ I said when I had caught up to him, before trailing off because I knew Adam felt differently.
‘You don’t need to explain,’ he said, softening a little as we walked inside the pub. ‘We’re friends. It’s totally fine for you to have a drink with Adam,’ he said, leaning on the bar. He glanced at me. ‘I just wish you didn’t look so good while doing it.’
I laughed. I liked Cameron when he was being like this – relaxed and slightly flirty. It made me think that maybe he could let go of the past one day. And that was good. For him, of course. I shouldn’t think about what it could mean for me. Or us. ‘Adam is just a mate to me. I feel bad though.’
‘He’s a good guy. Let him down gently, won’t you?’
‘Sure.’ I leaned next to him. ‘Do I need to prepare myself for seeing you here with Lorna?’
‘Lorna? No. I told you, I only see her as a friend. And I still can’t… Well, you know.’ He shook his head.
‘But if you could, who would you choose to have a drink here with?’ I found myself asking, and hoping he might say me. Malcolm, the landlord, took Cameron’s order then but I waited. I wanted an answer.
When we were alone, Cameron turned to me. ‘You know it would be you.’
God. Why were his eyes so piercing? When he looked at me, I felt almost naked. He’d given me the answer I had been looking for but, somehow, I didn’t feel good hearing it. What were we doing? ‘I need to get back,’ I blurted out, escaping quickly before things got even more intense between us.
Back at the table, Adam was telling his friends the same story he had told me so I sat quietly and finished my wine, not looking up when Cameron returned for fear that everything I was thinking and feeling would be written all over my face once I looked at him.
* * *
‘I’m sorry we were gatecrashed,’ Adam said as he walked me back to Glendale Hall.
‘It’s fine, I enjoyed it,’ I assured him. We’d stayed for a few drinks and it had been enjoyable, even if I had tried to avoid Cameron’s gaze all evening. Lorna had driven the others home, the designated driver, but Adam had suggested we walk back to the Hall and then he’d get a taxi. I knew we had to talk so we’d said goodbye to the others and strolled from the village together. It was a warm evening and the road was empty, sunset was only just approaching, another long Scottish summer day. Glendale was so peaceful in moments like this.
‘I think you were relieved,’ he said then, looking across at me with a sheepish grin, tucking his hands into his pockets.
I had to be honest. ‘I’m sorry, I really am. I just think of you as a mate.’ I nudged him with my elbow. ‘You don’t hate me, do you?’
‘As if I could. I’m disappointed but I knew it really. Can’t blame a guy for trying though, right?’ He grinned and I relaxed. He wasn’t heart broken or anything and hopefully we could just carry on as friends. I really did like him. ‘You seem like you have a lot on your mind?’
‘Do I? I mean yeah, I guess I do. It’s a cliché but do you ever feel like you’re at a crossroads and need to choose which way to go next?’ I asked him as we made our way down the road towards the Hall. I could see it rising up in the distance and I was pleased to see it, looking forward to climbing into my bed. And I wasn’t worried that I’d be alone or that it would be quiet there. I had got used to it. I even liked it more than I thought I would after being so used to noise and company and distractions.
‘Sometimes. I was offered a transfer at work a few months ago, to London, but to be honest I chickened out.’ He shrugged. ‘I’ve lived in Glendale all my life but sometimes I think maybe I should do something like that, make a change.’
‘I feel the opposite way. That all I do is make changes.’
‘I guess I should go back to online dating too,’ he said with a chuckle.
‘I am sorry, Adam.’ We reached the gates so I paused and turned to him. And he stopped too. ‘I honestly don’t know what I want.’
‘It’s all good, Anna. You don’t need to worry. You’ll figure it out. We both will. We’re still young. No one has their life sorted, even if you think they do, right?’
‘That’s true,’ I agreed. I had often felt like the only one who was lost but I knew now that wasn’t true. And maybe I wasn’t actually lost either. Just taking the scenic route through life instead. The l
ong way round. ‘Life would be boring if we all lived it the same way.’
‘I think I can safely say you’re not boring.’ He leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. ‘You’ve shaken up things around here without even realising it.’
‘In a good way?’ I asked tentatively.
‘Might need to get back to you on that.’ He grinned and I shook my head. ‘Goodnight Anna.’
‘Goodnight, Adam.’ I waved and walked through the gates, pleased that things were good between us. I thought about the prospect of leaving here for Ibiza in September. My summer in Glendale was turning out to be much more enjoyable than I’d feared. I didn’t like the thought of walking away from it as much as I had done.
For once, I quite liked the idea of being right where I already was.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Friday arrived quickly and I packed a small bag for our overnight stay at the castle near Edinburgh. The whole house was in cheerful spirits and everyone assembled in the hall to wait for the minibus to take us to Edinburgh for the murder mystery weekend.
Izzy came out of her reading room holding her cat. ‘I can’t wait to see the bookshelves when we get back,’ she said to me. John was putting up the shelves while we were away and then all it would need was the finishing touches and it would be complete. It felt almost like my project too and I was excited to see the end result. ‘And I can get lots of inspiration on how to organise it because this castle has the most amazing library according to the internet.’
‘We’re supposed to be having fun this weekend,’ her mother reminded her as she pulled on her camel-coloured wool coat.
‘Books are fun, Mum,’ Izzy said with an eye-roll. She kissed Ginny and put the cat down on the floor. ‘And besides, the whole weekend is book themed so what did you expect?’
‘Hmm. I didn’t think this through, did I?’
‘It’s here!’ Luke cried from the doorstep. He looked really excited. I got the impression that his family were a very different breed to Izzy’s and it was lovely of Beth to include him, and me for that matter.
‘Right, let’s get this show on the road,’ Drew said, picking up two bags.
‘Have a lovely time!’ Caroline called out to us. I followed Drew outside. We were making two stops, at Fraser Farm and the vicarage, to collect everyone else, before heading to Edinburgh. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d gone away with other people – not since before my accident. I was excited. Like this was a school trip or something.
‘Right, I’ve got music, I’ve got snacks, I’ve got games, let’s hit the road!’ Beth said as she climbed onto the minibus. Izzy cheered and even I clapped. Their enthusiasm was, as always, infectious. I sat by the window towards the back and we drove away from the Hall to collect Brodie and Emily and then we headed to Fraser Farm to pick up Heather, Rory and Cameron to complete our group of ten.
Cameron came to sit by me, the only empty seat left once he’d climbed aboard. He wore jeans like me although I was in a hoodie as it was chilly but he just wore a t-shirt. I breathed in the musky smell of his aftershave and returned his smile. As the minibus pulled away, I looked around me, suddenly suspicious. Everyone was in a couple – although obviously Izzy and Luke weren’t a couple as such – but we were all paired up in twos, which put me and Cameron together. I looked at Beth, who was passing around a tin of sweets. I wouldn’t have put matchmaking past her. She seemed to like to fix everyone’s lives. But surely she hadn’t noticed anything between me and Cameron. Or did she suspect something? Heather had made a couple of hints and they talked about everything, it seemed.
‘I’ve never been to Edinburgh,’ Cameron said as we set off towards the motorway.
‘I went to uni there, for my one and only year. It’s a lovely city.’
‘I went to Loughborough uni. My love of football led me there. I studied sport science and education. I thought I might teach one day.’ Cameron shrugged but I caught that haunted look again. His course had been changed by his girlfriend’s accident. Like mine had been changed by my accident. It made me wonder where we both would be if they hadn’t happened. We certainly wouldn’t have ended up next to one another on this minibus, that was for sure.
‘You still could. If you get tired of the farming life.’
‘What would my uncle say?’ he said with a smile but I knew he was still thinking about university.
‘I studied English Lit, but I hated it. Staying in and reading? Nope I wanted to go out and have fun,’ I said ruefully. ‘If only I’d realised how much I enjoyed cooking, I could have studied that and would have stuck that out. I mean, maybe, I don’t know.’ I knew there was no point in “what if”s, but it wasn’t always easy to stop yourself from thinking of them.
‘It’s never too late. You could study it now. You are really good at it.’ He smiled across at me.
‘Maybe.’ I settled back in my seat. Yet another path that I could choose. But I didn’t want to think this weekend. I wanted to just enjoy this trip. ‘We really need to change the music,’ I called out then. ‘We need a singalong!’ My suggestion was met with both cheers and groans. Cameron chuckled as we debated what to put on, and our conversation was left for now.
* * *
We arrived at the castle hotel in excellent spirits. We had sung until the driver had complained of a headache, eaten far too many snacks, and had a lively debate about the best sweets in a tub of Celebrations before quietening down as the castle came in view. It was outside of the city, set in lush green grounds, perched up on a hill, keeping watch over the city beneath it. It was made of light brown stone with two towers and narrow windows. The minibus drove up to the open door as a man in a green uniform stepped out to welcome us. We were ushered with our bags into the lobby and were transported into another world. The castle was decorated in dark wood and tartan, had beams across the ceiling and despite it now being July, a crackling log fire in the corner.
‘Right, pre-dinner drinks and the mystery starts at four p.m.,’ Beth said as she handed out the room cards. ‘Meet in this room then,’ she added, pointing off the lobby to the lounge. ‘Until then, the day is yours.’
I took my room card but before I went upstairs Brodie waved me over to the corner with him. Emily was heading to their room already. Brodie touched my arm. ‘I just wanted to check you were okay. You were sitting with Cameron. How did your talk with him go?’
‘It was fine. Good, I think,’ I said, realising belatedly that I should have told my brother what had happened. I was still not used to filling him in on my life like that though. ‘He told me all about his girlfriend at university,’ I added in a low voice.
Brodie nodded. ‘It wasn’t my place to tell that story but you can see why I thought you could help him. He has a lot of misplaced guilt. Like you do.’
‘I’m working on it.’ I smiled. ‘I’ll make sure he does too. I’m glad he talked to you. I’m glad I did too.’
He looked surprised and pleased. ‘Anytime. For both of you. You know that.’
I nodded gratefully. I did now. We parted ways then and I made my way up the winding staircase to my room, which was in one of the towers, letting myself in and breaking into a smile as I stepped inside. The room was high up and looked out over the grounds – a wide window at one end offering a beautiful view, and in the middle of the room was a four-poster bed. Off the room was a lovely en-suite bathroom complete with white fluffy robe hanging on the door. My bag was next to the wardrobe, which was open. Taking a look, I saw a dress hanging in there with a note attached to it.
Dear Anna, this is for you to wear tonight. I bought us outfits for the era! Beth xxx
I lifted the note off and looked at the dress – a long plunging silver gown. ‘Wow,’ I said aloud. Next to it was a fake fur stole, a pair of silver heels and a clutch bag. Beth had gone all out. I shouldn’t have been surprised. No one had ever bought me a whole outfit like this before. I was touched to have been included in this and excited to dress up and solve
a murder mystery. No wonder everyone at Glendale Hall was happy – they could afford to do things like this. I felt a little like Cinderella if I was being honest. This wasn’t included in the housekeeper job description, that was for sure.
There were a couple of hours until we were due to meet downstairs so I ran myself a bubble bath in the en-suite, closing my eyes and letting myself relax into the hot water. I turned on my relaxation playlist on my phone and let the world slip away.
Afterwards, I pulled on the fluffy robe and took my time to dry my hair and put on make-up. I Googled the 1930s and pulled my hair into a wavy style, one side pinned back with a pearl clip I had brought with me. Obviously, my pink hair didn’t really fit with the era but I did the best I could.
Pulling on the dress, I let out a little sigh. It fitted me perfectly. Beth really did have great taste. I stepped in front of the full-length mirror and appraised myself. The dress looked stunning and showed off my figure, the heels made me look so much taller, and I looked elegant, which I didn’t think I ever had in my life before. Never having been someone who longed to dress up, I was surprised at how good I felt. I thought that maybe I could get used to this after all.
‘Anna, you shall go to the ball,’ I whispered to myself before sliding out of the room.
Chapter Thirty
Walking through the door into the hotel lounge felt like stepping back in time. The room itself was art deco inspired with a glossy marble bar, velvet shell chairs, a huge gold mirror taking up one whole wall, arty pictures on the other wall, and a black and white tiled floor. A white piano stood off to one side and someone was playing background music. The room was full of people dressed in 1930s style, with servers dressed in black and white handing out drinks and canapés.
Always and Forever at Glendale Hall Page 18
