by Liv Rider
“Yes!” Aidan was transfixed by the sight, excitement fizzing to life low in his belly. If Dev’s fingers felt this good, how would something even bigger and smoother feel?
There was a crinkle of condom wrapper, and then Dev let his length rub up against Aidan’s balls, slick with lube. Aidan groaned, trying to press into the sensation even as Dev’s fingers pumped inside him, and he added yet another finger. Dev chuckled and held his hips down. “Relax. Slow is better.”
Aidan shook his head, made a desperate pleading sound. A feverish, clawing need gripped him. “Don’t want to…go slowly!”
Dev’s fingers slid out, but Aidan didn’t have time to protest the sudden aching absence they left because the tip of Dev’s cock was pressing into him.
It was…Aidan sucked in a breath. It was nothing like fingers, that was for sure. He felt stretched to capacity already. How was he ever going to take Dev’s whole cock?
Dev smoothed a hand along his thigh. “Breathe.”
Aidan hadn’t even realized he’d been holding his breath. He breathed in and out, and his body loosened. Dev’s cock no longer felt completely impossible. Dev slid in another inch between breaths, before Aidan could tense, and something fluttered on the edges of Aidan’s senses.
“More,” he demanded, trying to rock his hips.
Dev, being a massive bloody sadist, took his sweet time about it. He took Aidan’s ass in slow, excruciating inches, giving him time to adjust to each one. Every time Aidan thought he couldn’t possibly take any more, the stretch burning, his body loosened again, until he was filled to overflowing. He took another deep, shuddering breath, feeling Dev’s cock twitch inside him.
It felt…good.
But also…slightly disappointing. He’d thought there would be more, something more….
Dev moved out for the first time, and then slid back in, the angle changing subtly, and oh my god. Aidan saw stars. He fisted his hands in the sheets and whimpered, his ass clenching helplessly, as Dev found that magical angle, again and again and again, lighting up his whole body in pleasure.
“Oh my god. Dev.”
He lost track of who he was, of everything, forgot about hands and humans and wolves. Arching into the rhythm, he clawed at Dev’s shoulders, closing his eyes until there was only heat and the thick, overwhelming fullness, and he couldn’t tell where he ended and Dev began.
Dev nearly came just from the sound of his name on Aidan’s lips. Well, that and the hot, tight feel of him, the way he clenched and strained to meet Dev’s strokes. God, he was amazing, and Dev wanted to show him that, make him feel worshiped down to his bones. Aidan’s eyes fluttered shut, his head falling back as he moaned.
“Look at me, beautiful.”
Aidan’s eyes snapped open, everything Dev was feeling mirrored in pure crystalline blue, wonder and pleasure building with every stroke. Aidan’s ragged breaths matched the thunder of Dev’s own heartbeat, the slick sounds of their bodies. Dev held him pinned with his gaze as he fucked him, watching him climb higher and higher, wanting to see that moment of surrender. He reached for Aidan’s cock, pumping it in time to his own strokes. “Come for me, Aidan. Let me see you come.”
“I—Dev!” Aidan came with sharp, keening cry, his whole body shuddering, and that was all it took to send Dev crashing over the edge.
Bite, something said. Bite. He caught Aidan in a messy kiss instead, as the world went white. Every shadow in his soul lit up for an instant and he was coming unraveled, his pleasure and Aidan’s one and the same. Dev gave a guttural groan, his cock pulsing in Aidan’s ass as he came. “God, Aidan. Aidan.”
Reality reasserted itself in slow degrees, but that soaring feeling of connection remained as he disentangled them. Mine, an inner voice whispered. It was so tempting to let himself pretend it was true, an odd tenderness welling up at the warm press of Aidan’s body against his.
All he wanted was to simply curl possessively around Aidan and fall asleep, but he forced himself to get out of bed. He ought to at least pretend to be a gentleman.
“Back in a sec,” he promised, nuzzling Aidan’s neck before rising.
When he returned and cleaned them both up, Aidan blinked up at him with dawning wonder in his expression.
“You’re my mate,” he whispered.
Chapter 14
The knowledge clicked into place, a puzzle piece Aidan hadn’t known he was missing. It both scared and thrilled him, but it explained so much. Of course he’d be able to turn human for his mate. Maybe when they Claimed each other properly, he’d be able to do it all the time.
“Mate,” Dev repeated, going still where he sat, half-on, half-off the bed, washcloth still in one hand.
“Yes,” Aidan agreed happily. He’d never dared hope, figuring his messed-up genes would guarantee he wasn’t one of the lucky few supernaturals who found their other halves. It seemed miraculous that this piece of him was not only not broken but that his mate was amazing, sly-humored, impossibly sexy Dev.
His whole body hummed with warm, candyfloss content, his hands stroking the fine texture of the sheets. Hands were bloody fantastic. Almost as fantastic as sex. No wonder humans made such a big deal about sex. Aidan was going to have as much sex as possible, he decided, his mind already ticking over all the things he wanted to try.
Dev hadn’t moved. He didn’t look like a man who’d just been told something good. He looked like a man waiting for the axe to fall.
Aidan’s happy bubble wobbled. “You know about mates, right? Soulmates?” Dev’s knowledge of the supernatural had big gaps in it when it came to werewolves, but fae had mates too. Unless the dryads had somehow forgotten to mention that to their human family member?
“I’ve heard of them,” Dev said warily. “But what makes you think we’re mates?”
Aidan gaped at him. But then, Dev wasn’t exactly in touch with his wolf side. Maybe he truly didn’t feel this electric charge of potential between them, the gossamer thin thread of something that would become an adamantine bond in time. If it was cemented by Claiming. If. The thought was a bucket of ice water, killing his remaining afterglow in an instant.
“Mate-spark,” he said. At Dev’s blank expression, Aidan gestured between the two of them. “Like a feeling of connection? It’s what you get before the bond is fully formed, before you Claim each other.” He attempted a grin, heart pounding. “They say sex is a pretty surefire way to tell it’s there, though some people seem to know earlier.”
Dev seemed to pull inwards. “How do werewolves Claim?”
“With a bite. Though….” Aidan looked down at his hands, feeling the minty taste of his magic at the back of his teeth, as if it wanted to flare up and fill the space between him and Dev. “I’m actually feeling the urge in my magic rather than my teeth. Not a sentence I expected to say.”
“Fae Claim with magic.” Dev let out a long breath. “Maybe you’re more fae than wolf, in this.”
Aidan didn’t love that idea. He didn’t think of himself as fae. Had Mahon felt the same conflict? Aidan wondered suddenly what his twin’s recent Claiming had involved, and then immediately wished he hadn’t. Ugh. Naked visuals of his brother. He needed to go bleach his brain.
“Faewolf issues aside, you’re not sounding exactly thrilled about this,” he said carefully, his heart falling. Of course Dev didn’t want a mate. He didn’t even want to be a wolf! Aidan ought to know better than to assume. You’d think being rejected by not one but both parents on two separate occasions would’ve made him less recklessly optimistic.
“I’m just…surprised. I didn’t think I’d ever have a mate.”
Aidan picked at the sheet, at the space where Dev’s body should’ve been beside him.
“It’s okay. I mean, it’s not compulsory for us to Claim each other, and you never asked to get lumped with a shape-challenged faewolf. The mate-spark will fade, eventually, if we don’t do anything about it and keep our distance.” He forced himself to give a carefree laugh e
ven though his chest felt painfully tight. “Which kind of sucks because I was about to say I was keen to try all the sex things.”
Dev slid further onto the mattress and wrapped himself around Aidan, squashing the air from his lungs under the force of the embrace. He kissed him, fiercely, and Aidan clung to his broad shoulders to keep himself anchored in the storm.
When they pulled apart, breathless, Dev’s eyes burned. “I did not get ‘lumped with you.’ I’m the one who doesn’t deserve shit. If we’re mates, then I got lucky. You’re the one who got the short end of the stick, not me. I got the longest fucking stick in the world.”
The tightness in Aidan’s chest eased, though he couldn’t resist a coy glance downwards at Dev’s words. “That’s what he said.”
Dev gave a choked laugh, flopping back on the bed to look at the ceiling. “Give him a moment to recover, first. Mates,” he murmured wonderingly. “Hell.”
Aidan crowded against him, resting his head on his shoulder. Dev curved an arm around him, pulling him closer. They lay together in warm, thoughtful silence, intimate in a different way to just sex. His body felt loose and sleepy, Dev’s heartbeat a steady, comforting beat against his cheek.
Some of Aidan’s earlier hopefulness began to return. Dev hadn’t rejected the idea of being mates with a wolf. That was definitely progress. But what was really stopping him from embracing his own wolf side? Aidan wanted to stop dancing around Dev’s no-go zones and finally get to the bottom of it.
He traced the faint lines of scars across Dev’s chest, stark against the deep brown of his skin, wondering how to voice the query.
Dev exhaled slowly and said, still staring at the ceiling: “I’m…you know my biological father was a werewolf?”
His tone was eerily neutral, and the hairs on the back of Aidan’s neck rose. “Yeah, and I got the memo that he wasn’t winning any Father of the Year awards.”
“He hit my mom,” Dev said so quietly that Aidan felt the vibration of the words more than heard them. A beat that held jagged edges. “And me. With claws, sometimes.”
It wasn’t a totally unexpected revelation, but it still made Aidan feel sick, his wolf snarling. “Bastard.”
Dev lifted a hand to the scars on his shoulder. Aidan didn’t think he even knew he was doing it. “Pretty much. He was always worst, the days leading up to full moon. At least when it came and he finally went wolf, he’d just fuck off to the woods for the night. I always used to like actual full moon, since at least I didn’t have to worry about breathing wrong and setting him off.” His gaze had gone distant, lost in some past nightmare. He rubbed the bite mark on his shoulder. “I got this one near the end, when my mom tried to leave. He said he’d make me like him.” A grim satisfaction. “But he didn’t.”
“You and your mom got out.” Aidan needed to say it almost as much as he wanted to remind Dev of it. He laid a hand atop Dev’s. “You got out and had happy dryad orchard times.”
Dev came back to him with a soft huff of laughter, his muscles abruptly relaxing. “Yeah. Yeah, we did. And my father went to prison for life.” He turned to face Aidan. “I’m not going to be like my father, Aidan.”
Aidan frowned at him. “Hey, being a wolf won’t magically transform you into an asshole. It just makes you furrier.”
But Dev was shaking his head. “You don’t understand. It’s not about wolves; it’s about me, my tainted blood. I feel—my whole life I’ve felt this angry, dangerous thing inside me, the same thing that made my father lash out at me and my mom. The last thing it needs is for me to give it added claws.”
Aidan pulled away from him. “What about us, then?” he challenged.
Dev hauled him back. “Nothing says I have to be a wolf for us to be mates. Humans can be mates with supernaturals.”
Pounce on him and lick him until he stops being foolish, his wolf suggested, but Aidan didn’t think that would do more than just distract them both for a while.
“You really think you’re going to stay human next full moon?” he asked.
Dev didn’t blink. “Yes.” He sounded certain.
Aidan exhaled. On the one hand, he’d never met anyone as stubborn as Dev before. Maybe he really could stop himself from changing. The idea depressed him. If Dev stayed human, how long would he want to be stuck with a broken werewolf for a mate?
At least the odds were that Dev was going to be a werewolf come full moon, denial or no denial. Aidan gave himself a stern mental shake and told himself not to be so selfish. He was supposed to support whatever made his mate happy, right? Which meant preparing Dev for the change but accepting it with an open heart if it didn’t happen and he stayed human.
Even if that means he leaves me. He pressed his lips shut to stop the howl that wanted to rise up at the thought. Freaking his new mate out with a clingy need for reassurance didn’t seem like a great way to start. They hardly knew each other, really, even if it didn’t feel like that. It was reasonable for Dev to need time to process, to want to take things slowly. Aidan would just have to make himself be fine with that. He wouldn’t let himself be even more of a burden on Dev than he already was with his broken shapeshifting.
Dev blurted: “Come to my mother’s birthday with me.”
Aidan jolted out of his self-pity straight into surprise. “What?”
Dev looked like he’d surprised himself as well, but he didn’t seem to regret it. “We’re having a big extended family thing for my mother’s sixtieth in a few days. I’d like you to come with me. As my mate,” he said firmly, stroking a hand along Aidan’s side.
Dev wanted him to meet his family? That didn’t sound like the let’s-take-things-slowly talk Aidan had feared was coming. The gooey cotton-candy feeling from earlier began to return. That, and a more R-rated sensation as Dev’s hands wandered lower.
“What about my shapeshifting problem? And whoever attacked you?”
A shadow crossed Dev’s expression at the reminder, but he brushed it aside. “We’ll work it out. There’s no rush, is there, so long as we’re together?” His hand drew circles on Aidan’s abdomen, down, down…. He grinned. “Now, what was that about wanting to try all the sex things?”
Chapter 15
Dev woke to happiness. That was the only word he had for the sight of a naked Aidan sprawled bonelessly beside him. Aidan’s arm lay across Dev’s stomach, fingers spread as if even in sleep he didn’t want to miss out on a chance to touch. Dust motes floated in the golden morning light filtering through the gap in the curtains, painting a warm stripe across Aidan’s chest. His skin was smooth and unblemished, a contrast to Dev’s scars.
My mate. Dev had never expected to have one. He fit his hand over Aidan’s, his heart giving a painful twist. He’d never met anyone like Aidan, who held nothing back, who refused to be bitter or broken despite life kicking him repeatedly in the face. A deep, hollow wanting filled his chest.
Bite him. The beast inside him spoke, urging him to Claim Aidan as his own. Terror swamped him, so sharp he couldn’t breathe. No, he told the beast, forcing the impulse down. He had to protect Aidan from it. For a moment he wasn’t in the sun-drenched guest bedroom but a dark childhood room, his blood seeping into the sheets, surrounded by the echo of his mother’s screams. I’ll make you just like me, boy.
He closed his eyes, pushing the memory away. He wasn’t that child anymore. His mother was happy and safe, and his father couldn’t hurt either of them.
A flutter of apprehension filled him as he remembered his reckless invitation to Aidan last night. It had spilled out without thinking at the sight of Aidan’s vulnerable expression, as if he’d truly thought Dev might not want him, might not think he was good enough for him—even though that ran completely counter to the truth of the situation. Aidan might be better off without him, but Dev couldn’t let him believe he wasn’t wanted, not for a split second. The need to reassure him had overwhelmed every other consideration.
But how would his mom feel about him being mated t
o a wolf? Maybe if he waited a little bit to tell his mom the truth, she’d be okay with it—because Dev needed her to be okay with this. And he was sure once his mom actually met Aidan, she’d understand that he wasn’t like Dev’s father at all.
Thank God he doesn’t look like a werewolf, Dev thought, looking at one of Aidan’s pointed ears. His mom wouldn’t freak out just at the sight of him, at least. He’d have time to explain.
“Dev?” Aidan blinked awake. His blue-and-black hair stuck up in all directions, and his soft, unfocused expression changed to a megawatt smile as he met Dev’s eyes.
Dev wrapped his arms around him, burying his face in his neck and breathing in his minty scent. He wouldn’t screw this up, he vowed. If he couldn’t control the thing inside him—he’d leave, even if it made him sick to think about it. But no matter what, he wouldn’t risk hurting Aidan.
“Didn’t think you’d be a hugger, but I’m into it,” Aidan said, slightly muffled. “You okay?”
Dev pushed his unsettled thoughts away. “Waking up next to a gorgeous naked man counts as more than just okay.”
They showered, long and leisurely, Aidan shivering at the feeling of Dev’s soapy hands roaming over his wet skin. His body ached from last night, a good ache that made his toes curl every time he thought about the cause. The sex last night had had the added bonus of making him feel more grounded in his body. For the first time since changing back to human, his toes and fingers and bare skin felt like his own rather than a stranger’s.
“So, shower sex—how does that work?” He stroked his cock suggestively.
“Christ, you’re insatiable,” Dev rumbled. He grinned. “Lucky me.” He caught him in a messy kiss that soon had them both gasping as the warm water ran over their closely pressed bodies.
After they finally left the bedroom and came downstairs, Dev groaned dramatically at the sight of the coffee machine. “Coffee, I need coffee.”