“I haven’t given my career much thought.”
“Don’t stop bullfighting; it’s ultra-sexy. Well, not the killing part, but the dancing in the costumes is pretty fucking breath-taking.”
“Pervert.”
“Just trying to have fun. We haven’t had sex in a while.”
“I assumed that would be off the cards until you get better.”
“Shit, I hope not. That’s a long dry spell! Looking back now, it makes sense we had been having tons of sex. My pregnancy hormones were making me horny. I may have a banged head, but the urge will be back. It gets worse as the baby grows.”
“It does?”
“It does in me, anyway.”
“Good to know.”
“Just trying to lighten the mood.”
The sound of the front door being unlocked echoed into the living room, and Sofía appeared a moment later with a smile. “How is my favourite brother, and the woman mad enough to love him?” she said as she tossed her handbag on an armchair and sat down across the room.
“Only brother,” Cayetano scoffed. “We’re moving to Madrid.”
“What?”
“I know you just committed to moving to Valencia…”
“Actually, I got an offer to go on holiday to France, but it’s crazy to go away with someone you don’t know well.”
“Take the crazy offer,” Luna said. “I went crazy and had an affair with a bullfighter and it turned out okay.”
“Don’t hate me,” Sofía began, “but I’ve been seeing a guy and he asked me to run away to France with him.”
“Who’s the guy who thinks he can steal my sister?” Cayetano asked.
“Oh shit,” Luna said and looked straight at Sofía. “Darren has been dating a woman named Sofía, from Madrid, for the last few months. It’s you, isn’t it?”
Sofía looked down at her hands and then up at her angry brother. “We didn’t know how to tell you, either of you. We met at a party, and I didn’t realise he knew you, Luna. Darren didn’t know I was your sister, Caya. Not at first anyway. After a couple of weeks, we put the pieces together, but I had fallen for him by then. So, we decided to lie to you. Then Darren told me that you and he had a big fight, Luna, and I didn’t know what to do. I got caught in the middle. Then you had your fall, and I lost my job… so I came here, and Darren and I have spent the last four weeks together. I love him.”
“Should we just add this to the long list of stupid things you’ve done?” Cayetano said with a frown.
“Thanks, Papá,” Sofía replied with a sarcastic glare.
“It’s a small world,” Luna sighed. “Wow, I’m shocked.”
“I’m sorry I lied to you. I didn’t want to, but I was so stupidly in love that I became selfish.”
“I’ve been told bigger lies, Sofía. You don’t owe us any explanation,” Luna tried to soothe her. “Did Darren tell you that he and I were more than friends, in a very complicated way? Did Darren tell you that he asked me to marry him?”
“Yes, he did.”
“Did he tell you that I punched his face in a few months ago?” Cayetano asked.
“Yes, he told me that, too.”
“Did he say why Caya punched him?” Luna asked.
“He said it was to do with the Fabrizio Merlini drug scandal.”
“As weird as this is… and it’s weird,” Luna said, “I’m not going to get mad or bothered by the lies I’ve heard, on one condition.”
“What?”
“Darren has to tell you the whole story about his involvement with Fabrizio and me. The whole true story, including the drugs, as known by about only half a dozen people on this earth. If Darren doesn’t tell you, then I will.”
“Do you know the story, Caya?” Sofía asked.
“I do.” Luna could see Cayetano wanted to tell his sister that Darren was a drugs cheat, but he refrained. “And to think I was warming to Darren…”
“I haven’t seen him since my fall,” Luna mused.
“He visited you in the hospital,” Cayetano said.
“Darren would like to see you, Luna,” Sofía said. “Are you mad?”
“No, if you met Darren by accident, and you love him…”
“I do. That’s why, when he asked me to join him in France for the Tour, I said yes. Should I be worried about Darren’s history?”
“He’s not a serial killer or cross-dresser,” Cayetano said.
“Cross-dressing isn’t that bad,” Luna quipped.
“Remember that when you find Caya in your wedding dress,” Sofía joked and Cayetano rolled his eyes. “Should I go and pick up the boys from school?”
“No, I want to go,” Luna said. “It’s their last day of the year, and I would like to see the teachers and other parents.”
“Okay.” Sofía grabbed her bag and stood up. “Thanks, guys. I feel so much better that I told you the truth.”
Cayetano waited until Sofía left the room and turned back to Luna. “Holy shit,” he whispered. “Are you okay with all that?”
“If they met by accident, then yes. If Darren sought her out, then no. We can only take Sofía’s word for it.”
“I have bigger things to think about than who my sister sleeps with,” Cayetano said with a sigh. “Let’s hope we get some good news soon.”
44
Valencia, España ~ Julio de 2010
Luna screwed up her face, and Cayetano frowned. She had an expression like she had just licked a dead rat. “What’s wrong?”
Luna turned in her wheelchair. “I don’t feel well today.”
“Since you took the pain medication?”
“No, it’s not that.”
“Is it because we didn’t bring Giacomo and Enzo to the ultrasound?”
Luna glanced away from Cayetano, who sat next to her wheelchair in the hallway outside Doctor Aziza’s office. They were alone in the hallway of green tones, away from the voices that murmured in other offices. It was ultrasound day for at-risk babies from all over Valencia. Luna still hadn’t told Giacomo and Enzo that they were about to be older brothers, and keeping the secret was driving her mad.
“Maybe it is just that. But we’ve been here for hours, neuro-checks, physiotherapy and now an ultrasound; they would be bored to death.”
“Giacomo and Enzo are just fine with Sofía. In traditional Spanish style, we should have brought the whole family along to the ultrasound.”
“Perhaps I will yield and let all 200 of your closest relatives join us for the 18 week scan,” Luna joked.
“That’s just five weeks away.”
“I could be out of the wheelchair by then.” Luna reached under her foam helmet and itched her scalp, now all more or less covered with a fine layer of black hair.
“Baby steps,” Cayetano replied.
“That’s a bad pun.”
Cayetano pulled a face just as Doctor Aziza opened his door. “Luna,” he said with a smile. “So lovely to see you again. You only brought Cayetano with you?”
“I tried to tell her that the Spanish bring the whole family,” Cayetano said as he wheeled Luna into Doctor Aziza’s office. He parked the wheelchair by the desk and sat down, excited as a kid at Christmas.
“Okay,” Doctor Aziza said as he sat down behind the desk. He squinted at the paperwork on his desk; the bright sun shone in the window and reminded everyone summer was in full swing. “Since we see you here so often, Luna, there’s no need to go over any of your information. Let’s take a look at your baby.”
“It’s weird that everyone here has already seen the baby, but me,” Luna commented as she got up from her wheelchair.
“We were just taking care of you last time, Luna, on your behalf,” Doctor Aziza said and took her hand. Cayetano followed behind Luna, in case she fell as she crossed the room and lay down on the bed against the wall.
“Everyone fusses over me too much,” Luna commented as she unbuttoned her simple black trousers and pulled up her shirt. “I’m okay!”
“I don’t care if you think that,” Doctor Aziza joked as he tucked a paper towel around her pants, to protect them from the gel. “We are going to make a fuss every day until this baby is delivered, and after that, even then.”
“So shut up and do what you’re told,” Cayetano joked, and Luna whacked his arm.
“I will need to clear a space on my wall to put up a photo of your baby, when it’s born,” Doctor Aziza said as he got his ultrasound machine ready. “You suffered a head injury, and we discovered a baby. It’s a delightful story.”
“Twins would be even better,” Cayetano mused.
“Better?” Luna laughed. “Twins are bloody hard work!”
“We already know it’s just one baby this time. Were you worried about twins, Luna?”
“I have hyper-ovulation, that’s how I got fraternal twins.”
“They look like identical twins,” Doctor Aziza commented as he put the cold blue gel on Luna’s stomach.
“What’s hyper-infatuation?” Cayetano asked.
Luna snorted. “Hyper-ovulation is when my body releases more than one egg per month, so twins is more likely. With luck, it could even be triplets or quads.”
“Let’s just stick with one baby,” Doctor Aziza said and ran the transducer over Luna’s stomach.
Cayetano looked up at the screen and hoped someone could tell him what he should see. The doctor didn’t say a word, and Cayetano glanced at Luna. She had a deep frown on her face as she looked at the screen. The doctor hadn’t taken his eyes off the screen, but fiddled with what looked like a volume dial on the keyboard.
“Is something wrong?” Cayetano asked, hoping he didn’t sound too impatient.
Doctor Aziza glanced away from the screen and looked at Luna, and Cayetano saw tears well up in her ice-blue eyes. Cayetano looked back at the screen with the doctor, but couldn’t understand what he could see.
Luna looked to Cayetano, and he couldn’t hide his concern anymore. She sniffed and took a deep breath. “There’s no heartbeat,” she whispered.
“What? Why not?” Cayetano grabbed Luna’s hand. He remembered back to the emergency ultrasound five weeks ago; as soon as they started the scan, the heartbeat filled the room. “Are you sure you’re doing everything right?” he asked the doctor.
Doctor Aziza pressed hard on Luna’s stomach, and she moaned. He ran the transducer over her stomach as hard as possible, and Cayetano let Luna squeeze his hand hard. “Here,” the doctor said and pointed at the screen.
“Baby looks perfect,” Luna said.
Cayetano looked at the screen, and saw what he thought was a baby, a tiny body, a tiny head, what could be a leg… “But…?”
“But he’s dead,” Luna whispered.
The doctor continued to press hard on Luna, studying the screen now one inch from his face, taking measurements and squinting to understand the situation. Please be wrong, please be wrong. But Doctor Aziza turned around, and his face said it all.
Luna looked up at Cayetano as tears ran down her face in silence. It made no sense; in a matter of seconds, all Cayetano wanted was gone. How could a life, a family, be destroyed in just a few seconds?
“I have to do a vaginal ultrasound to be sure what’s going on,” Doctor Aziza suggested with a great deal of hesitation.
Luna shook her head but said nothing. She wouldn’t look at either of men around her.
“Luna, I need to be sure before I give you any confirmation,” Doctor Aziza said and touched her arm.
“No,” she managed to say. “You already know what’s going on, don’t you?”
“Preciosa, you need to let the doctor help you,” Cayetano added.
“No, he’s going to hurt me!” Luna said, and tried to get up off the bed. The sudden shift made her dizzy and Cayetano put his arm around her. Luna pulled his shirt and buried her face against him as she sat on the end of the bed. “Don’t let him violate me. He’s wants to hurt me,” she pleaded like a crying child.
Cayetano listened to her desperate words and experienced a deep pain in his chest. He held Luna tight against him as she cried. Doctor Aziza put the transducer back on its hook and looked back at the recorded image on the screen. Cayetano could see the doctor’s own disappointment; but it couldn’t be an ounce as much as his own, or Luna’s. They had just learned they would be parents five weeks ago, and after a tough road to come to grips with it, the upheaval was for nothing. None of it made any sense.
“What happened?” Cayetano managed to ask over Luna’s quiet sobs.
“I think I know,” Doctor Aziza said and handed a tissue to Cayetano. He hadn’t noticed he had tears on his face.
“Was it the accident?”
Doctor Aziza waited until Luna had calmed down before he spoke again. She sat back on the edge of the bed but wouldn’t face the doctor. “The accident may have been a factor,” Doctor Aziza tried to explain to the couple. “Because it’s early, it’s hard to say. You have a lack of amniotic fluid, as I said during the first ultrasound. Everything seems intact, so I don’t think the accident caused any damage. This could have happened irrespective of the accident. Oligohydramnios is a serious condition. Babies who survive a pregnancy with limited fluid are born with hypo-plastic lungs, which means they are severely underdeveloped. They suffer from clubfoot and malformed limbs, facial deformities, kidney and unitary tract constrictions. Some babies with this condition are born healthy, but in a pregnancy this early, it’s easy to see how a spontaneous miscarriage would occur. The measurements suggest there isn’t enough fluid for a baby to survive, and the baby doesn’t seem to have grown much since the last scan.”
“How long has my baby been dead?” Luna asked, still without looking at the doctor.
“It’s impossible to say. Have you suffered any bleeding?”
“No! I would have said something the instant anything seemed wrong!” she cried.
“The baby has passed away, but the miscarriage hasn’t yet started. The baby may have passed away without incident in the last few days. With the risks involved with your pregnancy, Luna, you couldn’t have changed anything to save your baby.”
“Are you sure?” Cayetano asked, and tried to wipe his tears away. “Are you sure, absolutely sure, the baby is gone?”
“There is abundant blood supply to the gestational sac but no heartbeat. That is conclusive. But a full, careful, gentle, vaginal ultrasound would tell us without a doubt.”
“No,” Luna said.
Cayetano looked to Doctor Aziza, and he just shrugged. Neither man could push her, not at this moment. Any more stress might confuse her more. It seemed the invasion would only confirm what he already knew.
“A fool would suggest my accident had nothing to with this,” Luna mumbled.
“It’s likely your accident put additional pressure on a baby which already had serious complications. As you know, there was a risk that a lack of oxygen during your accident could have caused brain damage.”
“But I’m fine.”
“Yes, but the baby isn’t as strong as you, Luna. I don’t want you to think you killed your baby when you tripped and fell.”
“I didn’t fall, I got pushed.”
Doctor Aziza frowned. “I didn’t know that.”
“Nothing can be proved,” Cayetano shrugged. “What do we do now?”
“It’s much too early to make any decisions. I know it takes time to come to terms with what has happened.”
“You mean I have to go home with a dead baby in me and carry on with my horrible half-life?” Luna said. She wiped her cheeks and turned on the bed to face the doctor. “So, what’s it to be? Suction the dead baby from my womb? Pump me full of pills and wait until I have excruciating pain and the baby falls out? Leave me to carry around a dead baby which will fall out of me, in a bloody, horrifying mess?”
“That isn’t how I would explain the options. I realise you’re angry.”
“Of course I am!”
“We need
to establish for certain that the baby has passed away before we take any action.”
“There must be something you can do that isn’t painful for Luna. Hasn’t she already suffered enough?” Cayetano asked.
“Would you like to go home?” Doctor Aziza asked. “Go home, take some time.”
“No, I want this baby out of me,” Luna snapped.
“How about a surgical option,” Doctor Aziza suggested. “You can be sedated, and Doctor Roig can be present to monitor your health. I can perform a procedure where I can know for certain that the baby has passed before we proceed. We can be as gentle as possible in removing the baby, and then the baby can be collected for you, so you can bury the remains if you wish.”
Cayetano shook his head as a new wave of tears erupted within him. Five minutes ago he was going to lay eyes on his new child, and now they were talking burial.
“This would be the best option for Luna given her current state.”
“As a victim,” Luna muttered. “As a broken piece of meat.”
“No, as a vulnerable patient who is suffering multiple physical and emotional injuries,” the doctor corrected her. “Some patients take several weeks to make a decision about what they do, and some want nothing. Some prepare to have a miscarriage at home.”
“I can’t go home, to where my children live, to start gushing blood in unbearable pain. I can’t suffer a miscarriage at home and just flush my baby, or toss it in the bin.”
“I’m going to give you some time to process this news. I understand how hard the situation seems now.”
Luna waited until Doctor Aziza left the room. “He doesn’t understand; he just has to say that because there will be a policy that requires him to care.”
“I’m sure you’re not the first patient to take their anger out on him, preciosa.”
Luna tried to button up her trousers as she stood in front of Cayetano, but with her arm still in cast, she slipped and fumbled. Luna burst into heavy tears, and Cayetano caught her as she collapsed against him. The moment she put her arms around him, he started to cry, an agony so similar to Luna’s accident just a few weeks ago.
Secrets of Spain Trilogy Page 83
