“Miann mo chridhe agus feum mo chorp.” Ceit whispered as she kissed his chest, and he sucked in his breath. She rested her cheek above his heart and lazily stroked his ribs until she caught herself drifting off.
I couldnae have heard right. ‘My heart’s desire and my body’s want.’ Heavenly Father, Ye have given me more than I deserve. I pray that I will be a worthy husband to this woman. She gives herself freely, and I will treasure that to the end of ma days. I wish I held the power to undo ma past. I wish that this were all new to me just as it is for her. I wish I were discovering passion for the first time with her, but I am discovering love. And in its own way, a far different passion than tupping ever gave me. Let me care for and provide for this woman the rest of our days.
“Mo aonar agus a-mhàin,” Tavish murmured. When she dropped a kiss and squeezed slightly, he realized she was not as asleep as he assumed. But he had spoken the truth. She was his one and only. He would fight for that and damned be any person who attempted to keep them apart.
Chapter Eleven
Their small party returned to court with more fanfare than any of them wanted. Magnus and Deirdre were exhausted from their separate and joint ordeals. Tavish wanted to usher Ceit into the castle and away from prying eyes and ears. He had matters to address with the king, and he desired the soonest audience possible. He would have Ceit’s position clarified and to understand exactly why the king planned to marry a spy into his clan. He also wanted information on how soon he would marry that spy. The confrontation with Deidre’s parents was ugly, and the king and queen were there to weigh in. Tavish stood beside his brother while trying to shield Ceit from the other ladies-in-waiting. He did not trust them not to tell tales out of turn when they realized she must have traveled alone with two men before reaching Deirdre. She tried to peer around him and even stand next to him, but he shifted to block her each time. She made her annoyance known by the bite of her nails through his leine and into his arm. He did not mind if it meant he kept her unscathed. He would match wits with her later.
The king finally allowed them to retire to their chambers, and Deirdre’s cousin, Elizabeth, joined them. While the two women spoke, and Magnus stood nearby, Ceit shot Tavish a withering look.
“I amnae a bairn. Ye canna treat me like I belong in the nursery if ye claim we are to be partners.”
“I wasna treating ye like a bairn, though now I’m tempted to.” He crossed his arms.
She stood on her tiptoes and leaned forward.
“I dinna need scolding either. Ye arenae ma father.”
“And after what we did last eve, that is a jolly good thing.”
“Ye arenae ma husband either.” She shot back but regretted the words as soon as they came out.
“Ye’re right. I amnae. Yet. But I ken I would protect ye from anyone who would do ye harm.”
“Bah. Who was there that was paying attention to me? Nay one noticed I was there, and I wasna in any danger.”
“Then ye dinna ken women vera well—”
“Clearly nae as well as ye. I saw them. I saw them all.”
“Who? What are ye talking aboot?”
“I saw the way the women looked at ye. The way many of them were sizing ye up and the familiarity that all too many had.”
Tavish unfolded his arms and wanted to scrub his hands over his face. Instead, he pulled her into his arms.
“I am sorry for that. I would change it if I had the power, and once we have the betrothal settled, we can leave for home. We dinna need to stay any longer than necessary.”
“And in the meantime? I get to watch all those women ogle ye. That’s why ye tried to hide me! Ye didna want me to see ye looking back at them either.”
“Are ye daft woman! I wasna looking at any of them. Merry widows or courtesans arenae what I was watching. It was the ladies-in-waiting.” Tavish snapped his mouth shut when he realized how that sounded.
Ceit’s face took on a shade of pink that grew red.
“The ladies-in-waiting? That’s who? Ma own friends. Ye couldnae be satisfied with me. Nae even the other women ye’ve already tupped. Ye want more.”
She backed away but not before Tavish clasped his hands on her shoulders.
“Listen well, queen bee, I dinna want any other woman than ye. I dinna lie, and I dinna tell half-truths. I was honest with ye last night when I said I want nay one else. I was trying to protect ye from the prying eyes and wagging tongues of yer so-called friends. I was trying to keep ye bluidy well unscathed.”
Ceit pushed her arms up through his and broke his hold, but only because he allowed it. She was not foolish enough to imagine he was not able to keep her there is he wanted.
“I already explained why I didna tell ye all the truth. Ye would throw that back in ma face after everything else. I canna believe ye. Ye dinna care at all.”
Ceit spun on her heel and left Tavish befuddled. He once again did not understand what she was talking about until he realized while he expounded on his honesty, it came on the tail of their argument the day before about her own honesty, or lack of.
Magnus’s voice permeated his fog when his brother called out that they would ride out on the morn. He was positive he was not going anywhere. Not without Ceit.
“I amnae leaving yet. Da sent me to resolve another matter, and it isnae taken care of.”
“Ye didna tell me aught of this.” Magnus was aware of what Tavish was talking about, but that did not stop him from goading his older brother by playing dumb. “What matter is that?”
“The matter of ma betrothal.” Tavish stared hard at Magnus, not appreciating his brother’s needling.
“Betrothal?”
“Aye, and ma bonnie bride has just disappeared from me, again, after giving me a good ear chewing.”
Tavish stalked off after Ceit to the sound of his brother’s laughter.
Ceit listened to the footsteps following her, but she ignored them.
He is an insufferable mon. Who does he think he is dictating to? Bluidy high handed oaf. I ken he has a point. I amnae daft, but he should find a better way to show me he cares. He doesnae need to follow me either. Canna he tell that I dinna want to speak to him?
Ceit picked up her pace, making her way towards her chamber. She was tired and dirty, and all she wanted was to bathe and put on fresh clothing. She loved Whisky and did not mind spending time in the outdoors, but she also enjoyed the luxury of a warm bath. She was ready to trade one for the other.
The footsteps increased their pace to match hers. Ceit was ready to turn around and tell Tavish to leave her be when a hand clasped over her mouth, and someone pulled her back against a hard body that was decidedly not Tavish.
“Your uncle is not pleased with you hieing off with those Sinclair bastards. No one gave you leave to go anywhere, and your uncle is prepared to exact a price for your disobedience.” A faintly English tinged accent whispered in her ear. The fingers over her mouth dug into her cheeks and pressed painfully against her teeth.
Rather than fight against the man who was much larger than her, she stood still and let him prattle. The more he spoke, the more she would learn. She made a half-hearted attempt to pry his hand from her mouth while the other hand slipped into her pocket to pull out the short blade sgian dubh. It was intended for close combat. She withdrew it and flipped it around to point the blade behind her.
“Buchan expects you to do your duty by your family. You were not to be warming some Sinclair’s bed. You’re to be in the king’s bed, and if not his, then his brother’s. You are wearing out your usefulness by the day. Mayhap, if you are bedding the Sinclair but not the king, you will have time to give me a ride.” The man pressed his hips forward but was gone as quickly as he arrived. His nails dragged across her cheek and lips as something yanked him from her. Ceit was sure before she spun around who would be there.
Tavish had the man by the throat with his feet off the floor. He shook the man, and Ceit was certain the man was about to pish
himself.
“I amnae any mon’s bastard, but I am Lady Ceit’s betrothed. I will let ye live for one reason only. Ye will tell her bluidy uncle she isnae his to control. She is to be ma wife. He hasnae any say in the matter. He will keep himself well and truly hidden in England. His reach isnae any longer than the Sinclairs’, and while he doesnae have the might of the Highlands behind him, we do.”
Tavish plowed his fist into the man’s nose and smiled when the crack echoed. He landed another blow to the man’s stomach before dumping the man at his feet. He leaned over the bleeding form and stared at him.
“Come near her again, and yer life is forfeit. Message delivered or nae.” He pulled his booted foot back and jammed into the messenger’s ribs for good measure.
Ceit was shaking, but it was not from fear. She was aware her feelings were unreasonable. She realized she should be glad Tavish followed her, came to her rescue yet again, but she was furious that he intervened. She had not learned enough from the man, and now she would not have that chance. She watched Tavish as he stepped over the bleeding, prone mercenary. He walked to her and tried to pull her into his arms, but she pushed back.
“Nay,” she shook her head.
“Ceit, I didna mean to scare ye. I’m sorry for the blood.”
“It isnae that. I dinna care aboot the blood. How dare ye intervene where ye werenae needed?”
“I beg yer pardon. I wasna needed? I rounded the corner to find some strange mon holding ye against yer will, or do ye like men to smother ye, and ye tell me I wasna needed. Ye are barmy, woman. I dinna understand ye. Ye would want me to stand by and let some mon molest ye?”
Tavish pulled her along the corridor until they were out of earshot from the mercenary or anyone who might try to listen. He used considerable effort to keep from yelling, but she frazzled his temper. His heart had lurched into a full sprint when he spotted the man holding Ceit pinned against him. He saw Ceit pull her blade free, and before he gave any more consideration to it, he ripped the man from her. He wanted to kill him and would have if Ceit were not standing there. He had far more he wanted to say, but again, he did not want to scare Ceit. Instead, now she stood berating him for caring and worrying. He scrubbed his hands over his face.
“I dinna understand ye. I ken ye can defend yerself, but why do ye insist upon putting yerself in harm’s way just to prove ye dinna need me? Ye’ve made yer point more than once. I get it. Ye dinna need or want ma help. Ye dinna really need or want me, truth be told. Ye may desire me, but ye dinna want me. Bluidy hell, I sound like a bluidy woman.” Tavish shook his head and stepped around her.
“I dinna say we were through here. How dare ye be so high handed and then presume to ken ma feelings? Then when ye arenae told what ye want, ye walk away. I dinna think so. I was more than able to handle the mon. What do ye imagine I did before ye showed up on yer trusty steed? I took care of maself. I needed that mon to tell me more of ma uncle’s plan, but ye just had to burst into a situation where ye were neither needed nor wanted.”
Tavish reeled back, and Ceit realized she went too far. He looked as though she stuck a blade into his gut.
“Tav—”
“Nay, ye made yer point. Ye’ve made it more than once. I’ve just been too blinded by lust to hear ye. But I hear ye just fine now. Ye dinna plan to give up yer independence, and ye dinna want a partner. Ye will keep fighting alone when I would fight at yer back. Vera well. I shall mind yer words and leave ye the fuck alone.”
Tavish stormed away, and Ceit watched him as a sense of finality dropped over her.
This is what ye wanted, isnae it? Why else would ye have been such an ungrateful bitch? Why else would ye have lashed out at a mon who has shown the patience of a saint with ye? Ye make it sound as though ye’ve been struggling and fighting on yer own for yonks, but ye’ve been at court a few bluidy sennights.
I have surely loused this up. Is he right? Is it that I dinna want to give up ma independence? Do I really have any now? I am fed up of being controlled by the men of ma family and this court, but Tavish hasnae really tried to control me at all. Just the opposite. He’s offered me more freedom by offering to fight with me. He didna tell me I couldnae take care of maself. He offered, over and over, to help. To ease ma burden. And what have I done? Pished it all away. What the hell have I done? Was it really just lust for him? Shite.
Ceit ran through the passageways to her chamber, uncaring who might see her. She locked herself in her chamber and allowed the tears to slide down her cheeks as she stripped off her clothes and stepped into the bath her maid must have arranged. She sunk below the water and let the warmth surround her as Tavish’s embrace once did.
Chapter Twelve
Tavish had no intention of being kept waiting for the king. After the misery Magnus suffered at the hands of the king and the court, Tavish was inclined to leverage that to his advantage. A few coins placed in the correct hands saw him entry into the Privy Council’s antechamber. He waited while a guardsman went to speak to the chamberlain. Tavish forced himself not to pace, but when the door opened, and the guardsman did not look encouraging, Tavish pushed past him.
“Lord Chamberlain, I would see the king on a most urgent matter.”
“You and half the kingdom. You may wait in the antechamber until someone summons you.”
“Just as the king remembered to summon ma brother from the dungeons?” Tavish said just loudly enough to catch the other men’s attention in the chamber.
“That is enough. The king does not serve you or your family. He will see you when he is ready.”
“And how can he decide if he’s ready when he doesnae even ken I am waiting?” Tavish stared hard at the courtier and hoped that he bluffed well.
The chamberlain stared at him before nodding once.
“Wait here for a moment.” He disappeared behind a large tapestry for a brief few minutes, the king following him back out.
Tavish realized the king had been there all along, but he was not sure whether the monarch was aware of him before his entry.
“Lord Tavish, what is it you require?” The king arched a sardonic brow.
Tavish stepped forward and bent low at the waist.
“Sire, I would ask for some clarification on the matter of ma betrothal.”
“Ah, yes, the fine Lady Cathryn Comyn.”
Tavish subtly looked around the room and noticed that anyone who was not already listening was now. He inched forward, so he was within whispering distance from the king.
“Sire, I would call upon ma godfather for a moment rather than ma sovereign.”
Tavish had every intention of using any possible advantage available.
The king leaned back in his chair and steepled his fingers. He watched Tavish over his fingertips for a long moment before nodding to the others in the chamber. The men filed out except for the chamberlain and two guards.
“Vera well, speak, Tav. I havenae all day to listen to ye havering on.”
Tavish breathed a sigh of relief. The king rarely allowed his brogue to come out while at court, but it meant that he was speaking to Tavish, his godson, rather than Tavish, his subject.
“Yer Grace, I would ken why ye ordered a Sinclair to marry Lady Ceit.”
“I didna order a Sinclair to marry Lady Cathryn. I ordered ye to marry her.”
Tavish gritted his teeth.
“I see yer da didna tell ye that part. Let me guess, ye tried to convince him it should be Magnus since he was already here, and he said ye were older. Is that aboot it?
“Aye,” Tavish breathed out through his teeth.
“And ye want to ken why I would have her wed ye.”
“Aye.”
“Leave off, Tav. I am listening to ye grind yer teeth from here. I didna do it to trap ye.” The king looked weary and much older than he had only moments ago. “Tavish, I am sure ye have figured out a great deal in the time ye spent traveling with her. I admit I have taken advantage of the lass for ma own g
ain. Her uncle and father arenae any better. I chose ye because I am sure ye were the best suited to her. She has fire running through her and a backbone of steel even when she seems timid. Ye are the best mon I ken to keep her safe and to make a happy life with her. I’ve kenned ye since the day of yer birth. I was the first person outside yer family to hold ye. Ye piddled on me.”
Tavish grimaced as heat flooded his cheeks.
“Dinna be embarrassed. One of yer brothers piddled on yer clan’s priest. I’m only a king. Ye and yer brothers and sisters are as much a part of ma family as anyone could be. Ye are wondering if I’m sending a spy into yer midst. Ye wonder whether I am doubting yer clan after scores of dedicated and loyal service. It isnae that at all. I want Lady Cathryn to retire from ma service as much as from her uncle’s. I would have ye take her far from here and far from her uncle.”
Tavish dropped his courtly mask into place and forced his expression to be neutral.
“Dinna bother. I can still read ye just like when ye were a child and trying to blame yer brothers for taking Mairghread’s desserts. I ken her uncle has her spying on me. I also ken he expects her to bed me or ma brother and vera likely will kill her when she doesnae.”
Tavish tried to absorb all the king imparted. Discovering the king was already aware of everything he planned to keep a secret for Ceit was like having the air knocked from his lungs.
“And if the lass doesnae want to retire? If she would rather remain a spy than a wife? Ma wife. Would ye release us from the betrothal?”
The king looked rightly taken aback.
“What have ye done?”
“Me! I have tried to protect the lass from herself as much as from others, and she is angrier than a stuck boar. She doesnae want me as a husband. She would rather keep playing spy than retire to the far reaches of the Highlands where she would have a doting husband and loving family.”
“I dinna ken what to say to that other than she’s had a rough go the last few years and a terrible burden laid upon her vera young shoulders for the past few sennights. She hardly kens ye. She’s relied on herself to stay alive since she left her clan. If ye were in her shoes, would ye surrender to a mon ye met only days ago?”
His Highland Surprise (The Clan Sinclair Book 1) Page 10
