by Susan Hayes
He was on his feet before he’d even thought about standing, his scales tightening until his skin gleamed and his cock hardening with painful speed. By all the winds that blew. It couldn’t be.
The door opened and a new group of Vardarians walked in, letting a gust of wind in with them. This time, the scent was undeniable, and he understood why neither food nor drink had eased his hunger. He didn’t want sustenance. He wanted her.
It took all his willpower to turn away from the female and walk to the bar instead. In his current state, he could do something incredibly stupid and announce she was his mate in front of everyone. He’d seen it happen. When the sharhal hit, it tended to melt the minds of the affected to a pile of glowing slag. Which was fine, if your destined mate was feeling the same effect. Though there had been some matings between his kind and the humans, he had no idea whether that race experienced the mating fever with the same intensity. Which meant if he handled this wrong, she might decide to fold him into new and unpleasant shapes. Best he paused for a moment before committing to anything that could get him killed. Or worse, get him mated.
Mated. He was having trouble accepting it was possible. It had to be a mistake. Maybe she was wearing a perfume that accidently mimicked a Vardarian pheromonal signature? Or it was a false response that would fade as quickly as it had come on. That seemed unlikely, though, given that reaction was unique to the Reekar species. As far as he knew, there weren’t any on this planet.
He ordered a drink from the droid and took another look around. Had he missed the presence of a Vardarian female? No. There weren’t any he could see, and the scent was too strong for it to have come from somewhere outside. His mahaya was here. If she was his mate. If he wasn’t losing his qarfing mind.
The servo-droid placed his drink on the counter, and he downed half of it in a few quick swallows. He wasn’t worried about the alcohol. His nanotech would scrub it from his bloodstream too quickly for it to affect his judgment. Something was just psychologically soothing about downing a drink before heading off to do something reckless and life-changing. He looked at the lovely blonde female again and winced as another surge of lust flooded his system. If he didn’t get his body under control soon, he’d have to resort to dumping the ice in his drink down his pants.
He conjured up every unpleasant thought he could—from getting caught in freezing downpours to the still-wriggling plate of Kall’ah he’d accidently ordered on a visit to the Ferrym’s home world. Decent beings, but by the winds, they had some odd ideas about what was edible.
Once he was back in control of his brain, his libido, and his body parts, Kade finished his drink and set out across the room. It was time to introduce himself to his maybe-mate.
The thing about going out with a group of former soldiers was that everyone wanted a seat that put their back to a wall. As usual, there was some good-humored jostling for position and she wound up at the end of their table, facing away from the door.
Skye claimed the chair beside her and gave her a quick smile. “This okay?”
She shrugged and ignored the itch at the back of her neck. “I’ll deal. It’s not like we’re in hostile territory or anything.”
It would take more than a few weeks for her to dull the instincts that were hard wired into her psyche, but it wouldn’t kill her to turn her back on a door. Not here. Geography made the Bar None tavern a natural middle ground between the Vardarian and cyborg sides of the colony, and it served samples of food and drink from every known culture and species. It was a neutral territory, a place where everyone was welcome with only one rule—if you started trouble, you were banned for life. Given it was one of only a handful of drinking establishments in the colony, it was a serious threat. She was as safe here as she was in her personal habi-pod.
The group ate, drank, and traded stories. As time passed, she relaxed and let herself get caught up in the fun. It was all still new to her, but every day it got a little easier to lower her guard and join in the social whirl that was part of her new life.
Besides, the alternative was to be sitting at home, wondering if Denz had arrived yet and what she was going to do if he had. She had no reason to be near the landing pads on the Vardarian side of the river. Hell, she didn’t even know what ship he was on or when it was due to arrive. He could already be back for all she knew. The colony was big enough that she had no way to track him down without asking questions. And if she did that, the gossip would fly faster than light speed.
Sometime later her neck started to itch again. She ignored it for a while, but the sensation didn’t fade away. Something was off. She did her best to check for threats without turning her head, but she couldn’t see anything out of place, and no one around her was reacting, either.
Only when he stood did she see him, the sudden movement just visible from the corner of her eye. A group of Vardarians walked through the door at that moment, and she turned to look at them as if they’d disturbed her. They hadn’t, but it gave her a chance to check out the male she was certain had been staring at her. He had dark hair cut short at the sides and longer on top, and his skin was gleaming a bright gold even in the dim light of the tavern.
That was interesting. Usually their skin only gleamed like that when they were readying themselves to fight or were having a strong emotional reaction. She was too far away from him to be able to get a read on his feelings. Her ability was limited to sensing strong emotions in someone within close proximity, but nothing about his body language indicated he was angry or about to get violent.
When he made his way to the bar, she gave herself to the count of three to enjoy the view and then turned to Skye. “Who is that?”
“You want to be a little more specific?” Skye gave an airy wave to the crowded space.
“The Vardarian on his way to the bar. I don’t think I’ve seen him before.”
Skye glanced in his direction and smiled. “I didn’t know he was back already. That’s Kade. He’s a trader. Shows up here every month or so with a ship full of specialty items. Hell of a singing voice, too.”
“He sings?”
“Sometimes. He plays the saryk.” She made a strumming gesture with her fingers. “Bit like a guitar but more complicated. He usually plays here at least one night while he’s dirtside.” Skye shot her a teasing look. “Moving on from Denz already?”
The suggestion made her feel a pang of guilt, which was ridiculous. She and Denz weren’t even a thing. There was nothing to move on from. And even if there was, she wasn’t. Moving on, that is. She was just curious about the male who had been staring at her. That’s all.
She was about to try and explain that to Skye but then realized that didn’t make sense to her, so there was no way her friend would understand it. “Just curious.”
“Which makes him only the second male you’ve shown even the slightest interest in since I met you.” Skye replied through the internal communication channels all cyborgs had. Shadow’s had been deactivated until recently because she had no one she was allowed to communicate with. Not until she’d come here.
“I asked because I think he might have been staring at me,” she replied on the same channel. It was a private link, and no one else would hear anything they said. She should have remembered it earlier, but she kept forgetting it was an option. She was used to being alone.
“Really?” Skye looked in his direction again and then grinned. “I think you’re right. And he looks a little flustered, too.”
A terrible thought struck her. “What if he’d crossed paths with another of the furies? He could be another Denz.” It was one of the reasons she’d chosen to come to Haven in the first place. She and Nyx might be the only two left, but over the years the Fury Project had fielded a number of assassins, and they had collectively racked up quite a body count. She thought she’d be safe here, where she already knew about the one being who had lost someone to the project. What if she was wrong?
“He’s Vardarian. They’re new to this part of the galaxy
, remember? They haven’t been around long enough to get on any corporation’s bad side.”
“Except Torex,” she reminded Skye.
“Okay, exception made for the corporation we blackmailed into giving us this planet, but there’s no way they’d move against the Vardarians this soon. Too risky. And way too obvious.”
“True.” She decided to distract herself with food and snagged a wedge of deep-fried tuber from the nearest platter. It was so good she took another and then nearly choked on it when a surge of desire hit her from somewhere nearby.
“Heads up. You have incoming.”
She turned her head. Tall, gold, and gorgeous was headed toward their table, his gaze locked on her. She tried to chew, but her mouth had gone dry and she was still struggling to swallow by the time he arrived.
All conversation around her stopped.
She could feel the need pouring off of him like heat from a star. It was disconcerting as hell. Shadow managed to get the last bite of her food down without choking on it and turned to look up at him. His eyes were a stunning crystalline green with black rims and oval pupils, and his face might have been crafted by a master artist with a strong jaw, full lips, and near perfect symmetry.
“Forgive me for interrupting your meal. My name is Kade D’vrayn, and I need to ask you something,” he said.
She managed a nod. “By all means.”
He smiled, and she was suddenly tempted to reach out and trace the lines of his mouth with her fingers. “What is your name?”
“Shadow.”
He nodded deeply, and when he lifted his head again, his eyes were fever-bright. “You are…” He paused, his chest expanding with an inward breath that seemed to last forever. “I’m sorry. I never expected…”
A fresh wave of lust mixed with doubt, confusion, and hints of frustration hit her, scrambling her senses and making her unsettled. She didn’t know what was happening, but she needed to get away from the conflicting emotions she could feel radiating off him. Shadow rose, shoving her chair aside so she could step back, and ran into a solid wall of muscle. She stumbled, and whoever she’d run into wrapped a strong, steadying arm around her waist.
“Everything okay here?” The deep rumbling voice wasn’t one she heard often, but she knew it belonged to Denz.
“I think I need to step outside and get some air. I’m not feeling well.” It wasn’t a lie. She’d never experienced anything as intense as the emotions rolling off of Kade.
Before Denz could react, Kade’s voice cut through the air. “I need you to let go of her. Now.”
Denz’s arm tightened around her instead. “Why would I do that?” he shot back.
“Because the female you are holding does not belong to you.” There was a dangerous buzz to Kade’s words, and she was almost overwhelmed by the emotions that were now bombarding her from two sources—Denz and Kade.
“Of course I don’t. I belong to myself.” She pried herself out of Denz’s grip and stepped to the side, away from them both.
“That’s where you’re wrong.” Kade held out a hand to her, and she found herself staring at his long, tapered fingers. “You are mine. You are my mahaya, Shadow. You are not unwell. You are experiencing the beginnings of the sharhal, as am I.”
His words took a second to register, and once they did, her throat tightened and her mouth wouldn’t work.
Denz reacted faster. He snarled a curse in Torski, turned, and stomped out of the tavern. She didn’t need to see his face to know what he was feeling, though. She could sense it just as clearly as she could feel Kade—anger. Regret. Disappointment…and frustrated desire.
Son of a starbeast. Was he angry that Kade was her mate instead of him? How was this even happening? Less than an hour ago she had an unrequited crush and serious considerations about staying single. And now…
She pointed at Kade. “You. Stay here, please. I need a minute to process this. Okay?”
She didn’t wait to see if he agreed or not. She turned and darted after Denz. Her life was hurtling into the unknown faster than a rogue comet, but at least she’d get her chance to talk to him again. Now she knew he had feelings for her it was going to be a pointed conversation.
3
The sun was bright enough to dazzle Denz’s eyes, and he had to slow his pace to avoid tripping over a servo-droid or bumping into one of the booths and carts that lined the roadway. The island was a natural meeting point between the two sides of the river with stalls, food vendors, and even regular market days. It reminded him of the main concourse back on Astek station, only with better food and air that had never been recycled.
On any other day, he would have taken some time to check out the wares and chat with the sellers. He knew them all by name—cyborg and Vardarians alike. The place represented exactly what he and the other council leaders were trying to achieve here—a blending of cultures that became something new and better. This was what he was working toward, and he’d invested a lot of his time growing that concept. Not today.
He didn’t get far before the doors of the Bar None flew open with a bang and someone ran out. It could have been anyone, but he knew one person it wouldn’t be—Shadow. He’d missed his chance with her, and it stung more than he’d expected it to. Still, it was for the best since she was destined for another male.
That thought triggered another surge of frustration. Phae was wrong. He wasn’t ready for this. Maybe when the human females arrived, he would be. He needed more time.
“Denz.” One word was all it took to stop him in his tracks.
“Shadow?” He turned to find her rushing over to him, her lovely face contorted into a frown.
“You were expecting someone else?” She caught up to him and poked him in the chest with her index finger. “You should have said something.”
He’d never seen her this riled before. Normally she was as serene as a spring morning. “About what? Your mating? Congratulations. Kade is a good male.” It pained him to say it, even if it was true.
“Him? No. That’s a cargo bay full of weirdness I’m not ready to deal with yet. What I want to know is why I had no idea you had feelings for me until I got sucker punched with it back at the bar.”
Fraxxing hell. He’d forgotten about Shadow’s empathic talent. “You felt that?”
She removed her hand from his chest and tapped her temple. “You’ve seen my file. It noted that it’s a weak ability that only allows me to feel powerful emotions from someone standing close to me.” One blonde brow arched. “So, imagine my surprise when I sensed what you were feeling a few minutes ago.”
He’d been so fixated on Shadow he hadn’t even noticed Kade had joined them until the Vardarian spoke. “You can sense the feelings of other beings?”
Shadow stepped back from him and then pivoted so she could see them both. As she turned, he caught the way her jaw tightened, her lips pressing into a thin line for a moment before she answered. “I can.”
“Then you know I am as surprised by this as you are,” Kade stated.
“Is that what you’re calling it. Surprise? Because what I got was a potent mix of lust and confusion with a hefty dollop of denial on top.”
“I thought I was one of the onar. Rantz, my anrik, is dead. I am past the age most males find their mate.” Kade shrugged. “It would appear I was wrong. I am sorry I handled this badly. The sharhal is already affecting my mind. I had not intended to be so…blunt. But when Denz challenged me…”
“I didn’t challenge you.”
Kade’s lips twitched into a sardonic smile. “Are you sure about that?”
“I was worried about Shadow. You came on so strong she was trying to get away from you when I walked in.” At least that was how he wanted to remember it. A niggling doubt in the back of his mind wasn’t sure his version was entirely correct, though.
Shadow huffed. “That’s sweet, Denz. But we both know I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself if I have to.”
“True.
But you shouldn’t have to. This place is called Haven for a reason.” If Kade couldn’t respect the rules, he couldn’t be allowed to return. Denz could make that happen. Fraxx. No. That wouldn’t work, because he’d be bonded to Shadow. Banning him would mean exiling her, and she wasn’t allowed to leave the planet. Double fraxx.
“Kade didn’t do anything to me, though. He had no idea I could sense his emotional state.” Shadow loosed a frustrated sigh and then glanced at Kade. “You want me, but at the same time, you don’t. Is that right?”
Kade looked pained. “It’s not that simple.”
“Nothing about this is simple! One minute I’m eating with my friends and thinking about a male I want to get to know better, and the next minute I’ve got a stranger telling me I’m his mate while the male I have a thing for suddenly shows up and accidently reveals he has feelings for me.”
Kade’s jaw clenched, and he glowered at Denz. “You desire my…” he stopped and shook his head. “You care for Shadow?”
“Yes. I mean, I care about everyone at the colony. Only…” He trailed off, but neither one of them said anything. Veth, they were waiting for him to finish his sentence, and it was dawning on him that Kade was right. He did want Shadow. But if he said so, he was going to complicate things to the point it would take a team of astronavigation experts a month to plot a course through the chaos.
Then he saw a way to uncomplicate things, and he took it. It would be so much easier this way, for all of them. “My desires aren’t relevant anymore. If Shadow is destined to be your mahaya, the matter is settled.” He bowed his head to Kade. “May your lives be lifted up by the fairest of winds.”
Kade relaxed as Denz spoke the Vardarian blessing, and for a second, he thought things were resolved.
“Wait a moment! Who said your feelings weren’t relevant? And what about my feelings?” Shadow asked.
“Perhaps this is a conversation best continued somewhere less public?” Kade said.
