by Susan Hayes
“She does. And I think she’s a hell of an ambassador.”
Edge cocked his head. “Say what?”
“Chance is one of you, but she’s living out there. She’s showing everyone that the cyborgs here are the same as anywhere else. She’s proof that the restrictions they put on all of you aren’t going to be necessary forever.”
That made Edge smile a little. “You are a cunning bastard. Does she know that’s her role?”
“She figured it out. She even did some calculations on how long it will take for things to change.”
“And?”
The gharshtu stirred in their pen, kicking up dust as they moved. Denz deliberately stepped toward the fence and the guards on the outside charged him, honking in strident warning not to come any closer. The noise was enough to cover their conversation. He didn’t want anyone overhearing what he said next. “Three years. But that’s just her forecast, and we don’t want that number being discussed openly.”
“If the corporations think we have a timeline, they’ll do whatever they can to screw us over,” Edge agreed. “I won’t say anything.”
Striker nodded and then raised two fingers to his lips and made a turning motion, like a key in an old-fashioned lock.
“I’ll be sharing this information with the council in today’s meeting. Do me a favor and try to look surprised.”
Edge grinned. “You got it. You going to let me have my rant about the defense grid?”
“If you must. But I was on the orbital platform yesterday, and it’s damned close to being finished. Instead of talking about the grid, you want to remind everyone that once it’s ready, it will quickly become a bustling waystation. Hell, we could be a major trade hub in time. Only, right now, none of the cyborgs can set foot on that platform. That means no recreational visits, no ability to work there, and no training opportunities.”
Edge’s smile faded. “I know. Is it really going to be ready that soon?”
“On my way back here, I walked through parts of the station that didn’t exist when I headed out. Reading the reports is one thing, but seeing it for myself made me realize how fast things are happening.” He hadn’t intended to talk about this until the meeting, but if he could redirect Edge’s attention, that might save them all some frustration later.
The defense grid was necessary and Edge couldn’t do anything to stop it from being activated. But the platform was another issue altogether. He’d gone through the entire agreement regarding the cyborgs at Haven before he got to the Drift to deal with the Chance situation, and he’d noticed something interesting. It stated that the cyborgs couldn’t leave Liberty, but there was no clarification on what, exactly, that meant. If they could argue that the orbital platforms were part of Liberty, the cyborgs would have more freedom. It was a stretch, but one he thought everyone would be willing to agree was worth trying.
“I appreciate the suggestion.” Edge arched a dark brow. “Even if I get the feeling you’re trying to manage me.”
Denz threw his hands up and took a step back, grinning. “I’m not suicidal. I have too much to live for to even consider it.”
“So I heard. You and Shadow, huh?” Edge asked, not bothering to hide his amusement.
Denz groaned. “Is that common knowledge already?”
Striker laughed and tapped his temple.
“I swear that internal comm system you all have is the source of most of the gossip in this whole damned place,” Denz muttered.
“Well, it’s not like you were discreet about it. Showdown in the tavern and then storming out into the street with her chasing after you and asking you out with the Vardarian in tow. Speaking of which, you should get going.” Edge smirked. “I believe you have a date soon.”
Striker made a running motion with two fingers and then waved at him. The fraxxing male had mastered the art of sarcastic sign language.
The sun had risen while they were talking, which meant he was cutting it close. “You’re right. I should get going. See you at the meeting later?”
Edge nodded. “Good luck with Shadow.”
“Thanks.” Denz turned and broke into a run. He’d messaged Shadow yesterday to confirm when he’d arrive. If she was going to cancel on him, she’d have done it. Which meant they had a date.
Now he was certain it was happening, he knew exactly how he felt about it. Anticipation filled him, and if anyone had been around, they’d have seen him grinning like a fool as he ran past. The whole plan was still likely to crash and crater at some point, but he was prepared for that. Maybe Phaedra had been right after all. It was time he started living again.
Shadow had never been on a proper date in her life. The closest she’d been was her flight with Kade last night, but that had come about so suddenly she had no time to think about it. Waiting for Denz was different. It felt like she was about to go on a mission, only one without any briefings, orders, or goals. She didn’t know what to expect, and the anxiety made her laugh. Freedom was more unnerving than she’d expected.
She had tried on every outfit she owned, which hadn’t taken long. In the end, she’d decided on a pair of cream pants and a scoop-necked top of pale yellow. She traded her usual boots for a pair of sandals she’d bought in a local market and cursed to herself when she realized the pants she’d chosen didn’t have pockets, which meant she’d have to bring a bag to carry her things.
“Who designs this stuff and why don’t they understand practicality?” she muttered as she raced back to the closet to find a bag that would work. Rummaging through her things messed up her hair, and she had to take another minute to brush it again. Preparing for a date was exhausting, and it hadn’t even started yet.
She checked the time. Denz should be arriving any moment, and she had a brief debate over whether to wait until he knocked or just go outside now to wait for him. She was still deciding when she heard someone walk up to her door. He’s here.
She got to the door and opened it before he could do more than raise his hand to knock. “Hi.”
He lowered his hand and smiled down at her. He was wearing a vest of dark gray that reminded her a little of the style the Vardarians favored, though this one was more tailored and had a second clasp in the front so it didn’t show as much of his chest and stomach. It suited him.
“Good morning. Hungry?” he asked.
“Starving.”
“Me, too. I’m still adjusting back to local time. My brain thinks its mid-morning and my stomach is convinced I haven’t eaten in days.” He stepped back from the door and made a sweeping gesture that invited her to come out and join him. “Would you rather we eat out, or pick up something and take it somewhere quieter?”
“Quieter. I think we’ve given everyone enough to gossip about already.”
Denz snorted. “No argument there. No one’s been giving you a hard time, have they?”
“Nothing like that. My friends are all amused, mostly. You?”
“Oh, they’re definitely amused.” To her delight, he took her hand and squeezed it gently. “But that’s fine. The only ones whose opinions matter are yours, mine, and Kade’s.”
The name hung in the air between them. Kade—the other male in her life. She didn’t know what to say next, and the silence stretched out until she blurted out, “Kade knows where I am, and who I’m with.”
Denz nodded and then pointed to their right and began walking before he spoke again. “Did you enjoy your time with him last night?”
It was like the two of them were picking their way through a minefield, choosing their words with care and not wanting to trigger any explosions. It wasn’t how she wanted this to go. “This isn’t going to work.”
Denz’s jaw stiffened, and he dropped her hand like it was suddenly too hot to hold. “If that’s how you felt, why didn’t you send a message and cancel last night?”
Shadow spun to face him, confused. “What? Oh! No, no. That’s not what I meant at all. I want to be here. I want to be with you. I j
ust…” she waved her hands vaguely as she tried to explain. “If we spend all our time worried about what we say and if we’re about to cause offense, this date isn’t going to be much fun.”
His expression changed, and it was like watching the sun come out after a storm. “Fraxx. Sorry. I thought you meant…” He grunted instead of finishing his sentence.
“I wouldn’t do that to you. If I had any doubts, I would have told you last night after I’d had some time to think about everything.”
“I wasn’t sure you’d have time to think about me at all. I’ve seen the effects of the sharhal before. I know what it does to a being’s mind, and…” he coughed. “And the body.”
She decided to be honest. No more minefields. “I’ll admit, it’s intense. And with Kade and me, the whole mating fever thing is accelerated. We went to the medical center and got everything confirmed. This isn’t a biological misfire. He’s my mahoyen.”
“Accelerated? Do they know why? Is there any danger to you?”
“No danger. It’s got something to do with Kade being older than what’s normal for their species. So, he’s getting the harder, faster, wilder version, and I’m being taken along for the ride. It’s messing with my head, but that doesn’t mean I stopped thinking about you.”
He gave her an intense look, his black eyes gleaming. “And you have no doubts this is what you want?”
She laughed. “Doubts about you? No. About how all this is going to work? Hell yes.”
He took her hand again and flashed her a smile that was all sunshine, no storm. “How about we start with food and figure things out from there?”
“I’d like that.”
“Perfect. Then I’m about to introduce you to the best breakfast place in the colony.”
“Don’t let Anya hear you say that, or she might ban you from the Bar None. She’s certain she has the best of everything at her place.”
“I’m safe. She doesn’t serve breakfast. I asked her about it once and she said she likes her sleep too much to open that early.”
They crossed over the bridge and into the Vardarian part of the colony. “I think I’ve spent more time on this side of the river in the last twenty-four hours than I have the whole time I’ve lived here.”
Denz gave her a startled look. “Really? Why?”
“Because…” she trailed off, unable to come up with a reason. “I guess I tend to stay on the cyborg side.”
To her surprise, he growled. “If I had known that fraxxing river was going to end up being such a problem, I’d have insisted the whole colony be built on the same side.”
“It’s a problem?”
“It is. Because when we envisioned what this place would be, there were no sides.”
“Then why are the two areas laid out differently?” She gestured around them. “This side is all Vardarian. Wider streets and lots of plazas, which I learned last night are created in part to be places where they can take off and land. This part of the colony looks and feels different than the cyborgs’ area.”
“The IAF donated some of the buildings the cyborgs use, and we laid it out in a more military configuration because we thought that would help them feel more at home.” Denz blew out a ragged sigh. “In retrospect, that might have been a mistake.”
“Maybe. But from what I’ve seen, you all did your best to bring together two very different groups of beings, and mostly, it works.”
“Mostly,” he agreed. “And we’re going to have another group to integrate soon.”
“So the rumors are true? You’re bringing human females here?”
“From Earth,” he confirmed. “The hive cities are overcrowded, and the infrastructure is aging. Those places were never intended to be permanent. They were only supposed to act as temporary sanctuaries while the environment was reconditioned to support life again.”
She knew this story. “But no one was interested in fixing Earth when there were so many new planets to colonize.”
“And now the hive cities are prisons. If you don’t join the military or get recruited by the corporations, you can never leave.”
“They’re prisoners. Just like we were.”
Denz’s fingers tightened around hers. “Exactly. I wish everyone else saw it as clearly as you do.”
“My experience with humans differed from the others. I interacted with more of them, for one thing, and a lot of them were just ordinary beings going about their lives.”
He gave her a thoughtful look. “When the humans arrive, how do you think the locals will react?”
“Some will be happy to have more female company. Others are going to take some time to adjust. You, Phaedra, and Anya are the only humans in the colony right now.” She took a half-step away from him and made a show of looking him over. “And you are clearly not entirely human.”
Denz threw back his head and laughed. She’d never heard the deep, rolling sound from him before. It broke the last of the tension between them and before she knew it, she was laughing too.
“What gave it away?” he asked a minute later. “The fangs? The eyes?”
“I like your fangs. Your eyes… honestly, until yesterday I really hadn’t been close enough to notice them much.”
“I’ve been told they’re a little unnerving.”
“By who?”
“People.” He shrugged.
“But no one here, right?” For the first time since arriving on the planet, Shadow had the urge to commit violence. It was just a twinge, but if someone here had said that to Denz…
“Here? No.”
“Good.”
His brows winged up to his hairline. “Wait. What if I’d said yes?”
“Then I’d be having a polite but pointed conversation with whoever it was about acceptance and the potential risks of upsetting a former assassin.”
“You would have…” He tugged on her hand, drawing her nearer. “That is the first time since…” He trailed off, swallowed, and then continued. “Let’s say it’s been a while since anyone has offered to come to my defense.”
She didn’t know how to reply to that, but it was hard to think when she was this close to him. Desire fogged her mind, and she had to fight to keep her hand at her side and not reach out to touch him. “I’m sorry to hear that. Everyone should have someone willing to do that.”
“Veth. You are something special.”
She thought he might kiss her, but he didn’t move. He just looked down at her with an expression she couldn’t quite read. His emotions were unreadable, too, which was odd.
“So are you.”
He bowed his head and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “I’m glad you think so.”
This time, when they set out together, she walked so close they brushed against each other every few steps. When Denz let go of her hand, it was only so he could put his arm around her waist. It felt right. In fact, it felt almost perfect. All that was missing now was Kade.
7
Knowing Shadow was with Denz right now was like an itch Kade couldn’t scratch. If he didn’t think about it too much, it faded to the edge of his awareness, but that was the best he could manage.
It wasn’t jealousy. Well, not entirely. It felt strange to know that his mate was spending time with another male, but he’d spent most of his life expecting to share a mate with his anrik. It was more that he wanted Shadow with him. He needed to see her, hear her voice, and let her touch soothe his soul. If he were being honest, he also needed to be buried hilt deep inside her body with his fangs in her neck, but that couldn’t happen. Not yet. He’d promised her more time, and that was one vow he intended to keep. It might be the only one he could.
Only when he’d returned to his ship did he let himself really think about how much trouble he was in. He’d let the sharhal push it all to the back of his mind for as long as he could, but once he was away from Shadow, ignoring the facts wasn’t an option anymore. Just thinking about his choices made him want to go find a drink and
a game of cards. The only thing that stopped him was the knowledge that hitting the tables when things got rough was how he had ended up in this mess in the first place.
Gambling wasn’t simply a fun pastime for him. It had started out that way, but over time it had shifted and changed into something else. A compulsion. Every win had become a validation, and every loss was a personal failure he had to disprove by staying in the game until he won again. He’d come to recognize that much, at least. But self-awareness didn’t make him immune to temptation.
He’d spent hours trying to figure out how to fix his current problem, and so far, he hadn’t come up with anything useful. Nesht’s employers were not the forgiving kind. They needed a way past Liberty’s defense network, and he was tasked with making that happen. He didn’t want any part of it, but they’d made it clear that if he refused, he’d lose the Chism’ah, and that meant losing everything. That ship was his home, his source of income, and the physical embodiment of his freedom. If he lost it, he’d be trapped, and he never wanted to be in that position again.
As distasteful as it was, he’d intended to give Nesht what he wanted…until he found Shadow. She was his mahaya. Every instinct he had screamed that he had to protect her, which meant he had to make another choice. Unfortunately, all his other options sucked vacuum.
He walked out of his last meeting of the morning wondering what he’d done to piss off his ancestors so thoroughly that they’d guided him to his mate and then forced him to choose between her life and his freedom. Or maybe it had nothing to do with his actions, and his ancestors were just petty bakaffas.
Now that he was finished connecting with all the locals he did business with, his next stop was to make a personal purchase—one he never thought he would need. He was on his way to buy a set of traditional harani, the matching armbands worn by his species after they were mated. He had a slightly unconventional design in mind, though, which meant a custom job in a hurry. Fortunately, he knew someone who could get it done.
As new as Haven was, it was already starting to organize itself into districts. Industrial complexes in one area, grocers and butchers in another, and a burgeoning artists’ district. Here the potters, weavers, carpenters, and other creative types worked and sold their wares, creating one-of-a-kind pieces that were far superior to the functional but soulless items that came out of the automated factories.
