by Grace, Aria
“Where are you going?” Rubin asks as I charge toward the bedroom door.
Surprised he even has ask, I furrow my brows. “I need to see Nick.”
Rubin cocks his head and glances down my body.
It takes me a minute to remember what I’m wearing. “Right, I should probably get dressed first…” My voice trails off as I dash to my closet and begin rifling through it for clothes.
“Yeah, and maybe take a shower. Or, and this is just a thought, wait until morning.” Rubin looks at me pointedly.
“How can you even say that?” Is he insane? “You just spent forever bitching at me about hearing him out, and now you’re telling me I should wait?”
“That was hours ago.” Rubin gestures to the clock sitting on the night stand between our beds. “You’ve been sitting there listening to messages for like three hours. It’s dark outside, pitch black, and snowing heavily. The roads are icy and dangerous. No one should be driving on a night like tonight.”
“But, Rubin…” I feel deflated as I return to my bed. “I need to tell him. I need to apologize and let him know I’ve been a complete idiot. This…all of this is my fault. I love him, and I almost let all that get ruined by my abusive ex. A guy who doesn’t even have a stake in my life anymore.”
“Then call him. Technology is amazing these days.” He smirks at his smartass suggestion.
“I can’t tell him this over the phone. I need to see him.” I pace back and forth between our beds, trying to come up with a way to get to him tonight.
“Then come with me to the farm tomorrow. He’ll be so happy to see you.” Rubin is probably more worried about me borrowing his car to drive in this weather than anything else, but he does have a point. “Besides, there’s always a last-minute tree rush on Christmas eve. We’ll really need the extra help.”
As painful as it is to do, I sigh and sit back on my bed. “Yeah…I guess. I just. I feel like I’ve got emotional whiplash over here. Meanwhile, he still thinks I hate him.”
“I know, but you’re not going to make him feel any better if you’re wrapped around a tree on Christmas eve eve.”
“Eve eve?”
“The eve of Christmas eve?” Rubin looks at me like I should have been able to figure that out for myself.
I guess I should have.
“What am I supposed to do now? I feel like I’ve had a major epiphany. Like I’m holding the meaning of life in the palm of my hand, but I can’t share it with anyone because there’s ice on the road.”
Rubin nods in the direction off my night stand. “Did you ever take one of those pregnancy tests I gave you?”
I follow his gaze and shake my head. “N-no. I wasn’t really sure I wanted to know.”
“And now?” He turns to me with a raised eyebrow.
“I’m still not sure.” I open the nightstand drawer with a trembling hand. Inside, on top of a bunch of random junk I’ve accumulated over my stay here, are three pregnancy tests still in their protective blue wrappers.
“Taking the test isn’t going to change anything,” Rubin says with a reassuring tone in his voice. “Whether you’re pregnant or not doesn’t change, but you’re going to have to find out sooner or later.”
“I just…how am I supposed to take a pregnancy test?” I look at him exasperatedly and let my arms fall to my sides.
“Uh, well…” Rubin blinks several times in confusion. “The usual method is to pee on it.”
I groan. “That’s not what I meant. I mean, I don’t even know if Nick will accept my apology. If I were in his position, I don’t think I’d be able to do it. If I’m pregnant with his baby, what do I do if he hates me? Do I tell him and then ask him to take me back? That sounds like I’m trying to trap him. Or do I wait to see if he even wants me back, and then tell him about the baby? I just…it all sounds awful.”
“You’re overthinking everything. Again.” Rubin crosses the room and picks up one of the test sticks. “After listening to all those messages, how can you still be worried about his feelings for you?”
I look away, unable to meet Rubin’s eyes. It’s true, I don’t doubt Nick anymore. I ignored him for a week, and yet he never gave up trying to reach me. If anything, his determination to be near me has only gotten stronger.
“It’s not him I’m worried about.” I focus my gaze on the test, too ashamed to look Rubin in the eyes. “After the way I’ve been acting, how can I be a dad? I can barely take care of myself. How am I supposed to raise another human being?”
Rubin grins at me and presses the pregnancy test into my hand. “No one knows what they’re doing the first time they have kids. Every pregnant omega I’ve ever talked to has had doubts about their ability to be a parent. I’m just glad you’re finally being honest about what you’re feeling.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.” I huff and try to convince myself this is the right thing to do. It’s not easy.
“I know it doesn’t. There’s nothing I can say that will leave you better equipped to be a dad. There’s nothing I can do to convince you you’re ready to tackle this monumental task.” Rubin puts his hands on my shoulders and presses his forehead against mine. It’s a simple gesture, but I feel like he’s the supportive brother I never had.
“Unlike a lot of omegas here, you’ve got an opportunity to start a life with the father of your baby.” Rubin’s voice softens as he raises his head and looks me in the eye. “But first, you’ve got to find out if you’re even pregnant. You two can decide what to do from there.”
I inhale a deep, shuddering breath and nod my head. “Yeah…okay.” With the pregnancy test clutched in my fist, I march down the hall toward the bathroom.
55
Nick
It’s Christmas eve, and I’m more dejected than ever.
Scotty wasn’t at the tree farm again today, despite all the wishful thinking I’ve done over the past twenty-four hours. As soon as Rubin pulled in, I begged him for good news. All he said was he gave Scotty my message, but he didn’t have any other updates for me.
Why does it feel like someone has ripped my heart out of my chest and left me with a bloody, gaping wound? The valley is so deep, it’ll never be filled again. Which is fine with me because I could never even consider trying again. Pain like this isn’t something that heals with time.
This must be the flip side of the whole “fated mates” thing. Losing your fated mate has to be one of the most difficult things anyone can ever go through.
Despite knowing I should come to terms with reality, I can’t stop that kernel of hope from forming because deep down, I want to believe he’s not gone forever. Maybe someday I’ll be able to win him over. That’s if I can find a way to stay in contact with him that doesn’t get me labeled as a stalker. The last thing I need is for Scotty to request a restraining order against me.
The short drive home from the farm is cold and lonely. Since the day I spent with Scotty, my house hasn’t felt warm or inviting. It’s just a place where I lay my head. The same place I dread going back to every night.
When I pull up to the house, I do a double take because the lights are on inside. At first, I chalk it up to my recent carelessness, but I’m certain I didn’t leave them on when I left. I’m about to reach for my cell phone to call the police when something in my belly tells me to wait. Why would a burglar flood every room of a house they were robbing with lights? Not to mention turning on the Christmas lights that festoon my front yard.
Like every year, Mom came by and decorated the entire place from top to bottom last week while I was at the farm. Heaven forbid her son’s home remain barren during the Christmas season.
As I exit my car, I try to keep my emotions in check. Part of me is nervous about what I’m about to walk in on but a much bigger part of me is excited. Hopeful.
The twinkling lights twisting around the rails of my front porch reassure me a little bit. There’s no way to turn on the Christmas lights by accident. Of course, there
’s a small chance my parents have stopped by for a visit, but that seems unlikely. I’ll be seeing them in the morning so there’s no reason for them to be here, even though I haven’t stopped in to see them in a few days.
Reaching the last step of the front porch, I take a deep breath and prepare myself for whatever is waiting for me on the other side of the door.
As soon as I open the door, all the air rushes out of my lungs. I feel as if my heart has stopped beating and time has slowed to a crawl.
“Scotty…” I breathe out the name that’s been on my mind for weeks.
My omega is sitting beside the Christmas tree that my mother insisted on setting up in the living room wearing nothing but a red ribbon tied around his chest and fastened with a bow.
“Hey, you…” He smiles at me softly. There’s a sadness to his eyes that stabs me through my heart. “Why don’t you close the door? It’s freezing out there.”
“R-right…” Absently, I reach out and close the door behind me. “What are you doing here? I mean, I’m happy to see you. I just… Scotty, you’re here.” My brain is running in a million different directions, and I have no idea where to start. I want to go to him, my body is already telling me to do just that, but at the same time, I feel like there’s so much that needs to be said first.
“Nick, don’t say anything.” Scotty rises from his perch beside the tree. The sight of his gorgeous nude body makes my cock do a somersault in my pants.
“I made a mistake, shutting you out like that.” Scotty holds my gaze as he slowly approaches me. “The fact is, you didn’t do anything wrong. It was my own self-doubt that made me push you away. The worst part is, once I actually started listening to your messages, all that doubt was washed away. You…you seem to know exactly what to say to soothe my fears. I was a fool for thinking I was using you. I need you, Nick. I’m a mess without you.”
I pull him into my arms as soon as he’s close enough and bury my face against his hair. Inhaling his scent reassures me this is real and not just some elaborate hallucination or Christmas eve journey through dreamland.
“I’ve missed you so much.” I clear my throat, trying to fight back the tide of emotions coursing through me. “I can’t even begin to tell you just how badly.”
“I was so scared you might not want to take me back after everything I’ve done.” Scotty steps back slightly and looks me in the eye. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Just promise me that whenever you start to doubt yourself, you’ll come to me. Promise you’ll let me hold you and do what I can to assuage your fears. Promise you won’t retreat inside yourself again. Let me take care of you.” I kiss his forehead to highlight my sincerity.
“I promise,” Scotty whispers, wiping away the threat of tears in his eyes. “I won’t make the same mistake again. Now I know, I really know, that you’re my fated mate. My alpha. I love you, Nick.”
“I love you, Scotty.” My heart feels like it might explode in happiness as our lips meet in a heated kiss that’s long overdue. My mouth hungrily claims his as I pick him up and carry him toward the stairs.
It only takes a few seconds for me to reach my bedroom, but it feels like a lifetime, especially with the needy, naked omega in my arms. His erection is beginning to press against my belly as he wraps his arms and legs around me, using his thigh muscles to bounce up and down my torso. His kisses continue to press along my neck as I struggle to get through the door.
The room is cool, almost chilly, but the heat pouring off Scotty’s skin makes me eager to shed my clothes too. When I drop him onto the bed, he smiles and sprawls across the comforter.
The sight of him, wrapped in a ribbon and smiling up at me, makes my balls tighten. I’m grinning from ear to ear as I scramble out of my suit.
“I’ve got to tell you, this is the best Christmas present I’ve ever gotten.” I kick aside the last of my clothes, desperate to feel his skin on mine.
“I’m glad,” Scotty purrs as he rolls onto his belly and lifts his ass into the air, “because all I want for Christmas is you.” He looks over his shoulder at me and winks.
“What did I tell you about being naughty?” I crawl onto the bed behind him, licking my lips at the heavenly image of his ass and thighs glistening with slick. His body is ready and eager to take me. He’s probably been naked and waiting for a couple hours, at least. Meanwhile, my cock is still waking up.
“That you’re a deviant Santa who rewards people for being naughty?” Scotty looks back at me with a mischievous grin.
“Eventually, maybe.” I slide a finger into his ass and gently swirl it in his slick. “But I think you’ve forgotten just how much I like foreplay.”
Scotty’s muscles tighten around my finger as I gently slide it in and out of him. He’s so aroused, and his ass is so wet, that I’m almost certain he can barely feel it. His needy moan is confirmation of my suspicion. “You’re such a tease. You know I need more than that. Your big alpha dick has spoiled me.”
“Has it really?” I give him one last plunge before pulling my finger away. “Then maybe you need something else to help get you started.” I circle around to the side of the bed and open the drawer of my nightstand. Inside is a set of butt plugs in various sizes. I select one with a larger base and hold it up for him to see. “What do you think of this?”
“Oh fuck, Nick. It’s so big.” He whimpers but his cock bounces in anticipation, so I know he’s not afraid. “I want it, please…”
“As you wish, baby.” I return to my place behind him and gently press the tapered end of the plug against his asshole. He desperately thrusts his ass backwards, trying to force himself onto it. But I’m quicker. Pull it back slightly, only the smallest bit of it actually breaches his tight rosebud.
“You’re not being fair.” Scotty looks at me with his lip in a pout. “If you’re just gonna tease me, then why bother getting it out at all.”
“Because I wanna make sure you’re ready. Also, it’s fun to see you get so worked up over it. It makes my balls twitch because I know how good it’s gonna feel when I’m finally inside you again. I fucking love the sounds you make and way your face flushes with desire when my cock is driving into you.” As I talk, I press the butt plug gently against his opening, making sure it’s covered entirely in slick before applying pressure.
When it finally slides into place, Scotty moans so loudly I’m sure he’s gonna collapse onto the mattress from the intensity. “Fuck, Nick. That’s…good.” Scotty lowers himself onto the mattress and slowly rolls onto his back. “I wasn’t expecting it to feel like this.”
“Better than cock?” I tease as I move up between his legs and look down at him.
“Not better.” He shakes his head emphatically. “But really good.”
I thrust my hips forward slightly, allowing my cock to lay across his abdomen and rub against his erection. “I’m glad you like it.”
“What are you doing?” His eyes flit from our touching cocks to my face.
“Just making sure you have a good time.” I wrap my hand around both of our dicks and give them a few gentle strokes. That’s all it takes to have him moaning in ecstasy. For my part, half the pleasure is watching his reaction.
“Oh fuck, Nick. The plug, the…thing you’re doing with your hand… I just…” His back arches up off the bed as he moans again.
Apparently, my little omega has never experienced frotting before. I grin down at him as I give our cocks a nice firm squeeze while sliding my hand along the shaft. His reaction is priceless as he turns his head to the side and his eyes roll back under his lids. A soft, cute whimper escapes from his throat, making my heart skip a beat.
Leaning forward slightly, I trail the fingertips of my free hand across his chest, refamiliarizing myself with his perfect form. Scotty coos in response to my touch, looking up at me through heavily lidded eyes.
“You’re too good to me.” The ghost of a smile appears on his face as he reaches for my hand with one of his an
d laces our fingers together. “I never meant to hurt you.”
“I know you didn’t,” I reassure him, squeezing his hand a little. “We just got off to a rocky start. Every couple has to figure this stuff out as they go. There’s no manual for relationships after all.” Giving both of our cocks a long smooth stroke helps emphasize my point. “But we’ll figure it out.”
“Mmmm…oh…that’s nice,” Scotty says as he meets my eyes. “But don’t you think it’s time for something else? Maybe something a little more vigorous?” His hips thrust upward, rubbing his cock against mine and causing me to shiver with pleasure.
“Slow down, baby. Don’t you just want to enjoy this?” I’m only half serious. Seeing his gorgeous body, hearing his cute little moans, and being so close to him, has made it almost impossible for me to hold back any longer.
“There’ll be plenty of time to take things slowly in the future,” Scotty says in a husky tone. “I’ve missed you, alpha. I need to feel you in me.”
“The future, huh?” I release my grip on our cocks and lean over him with my hands on either side of his head. “Are you saying you want to stay with me, Scotty?”
His cheeks flush bright pink as he nods. “I can’t imagine anywhere else I’d rather be.”
“Thank fuck.” I duck my head down and kiss him sweetly on the lips. “Because there’s no one else I want by my side.”
“Do you really mean that?” he asks after a moment of silence. “You really want me?”
I swallow back the protest forming in my throat. Rubin clued me in on some of Scotty’s insecurities, so I know he’s looking for reassurance. He’s going to need a lot of support to reach a place where he’s comfortable and secure in our relationship.
So it’s a good thing I’m ready to report for duty.
“Scotty…my sweet little omega. I want you, only you, by my side, for the rest of our lives. I want us to wake up together every morning and to fall asleep together every night. I want to get to know you better than anyone else in the world.” I kiss him again, this time lingering slightly as I grind my hips against his cock. “And…if you’re willing, I would love to make you the father of my children. You’re my fated mate. The other half of my soul. I love you.”
