by S T Branton
"Do you think she could be in danger?” I asked. “Why would Farsiders have anything to do with a Senator?”
"I don't know," Pip admitted. "But it's something. Something big. The people who kidnapped us weren't involved in the plan, but they knew about it. That's why they started kidnapping so many of us. They were preparing for war—and they think it's imminent."
Well, shit.
"I think it's about time for a brief pit stop," Ally announced an hour later.
We'd all stayed quiet, pulling inside ourselves as we tried to process what Pip told us. It was a lot to process. If Pip was right, the Farsiders capturing the Lizard folk were banking on a lot of chaos and war if their plan worked out, and the snickering schemers had mentioned Cabot by name. They were downright giddy about it and about all the things they would get away with in broad daylight after their plan worked and the summit went south.
Ally and I stayed quiet. The young lizard girl, not so much. And by extension, not Archie. She spent up until about twenty minutes ago playing with Splinter as he ran around, bounced off cushions, and skittered across the counter. Finally, he tumbled from the back of the couch and landed on the gray cushions already deep in sleep. That was when she wandered over to Archie and started trying to figure out what he was up to.
"What's this?"
"Hairs."
"And this?"
Archie set his jaw. "Scales from a Far sea monster."
"What are these?" Pip pointed.
"River rocks.” He was trying to keep the aggravation out of his voice and not doing well.
And so it continued, a cascade of questions and nosiness, answered by an increasingly grumpy Archie. I felt like Ally and I managed to de-grump him so much, but a few minutes strapped to the floor of an RV with a tiny lizard girl rattling off every thought that came to her mind in her existence stuffed it right back in. He seemed the most relieved when Ally suggested the pit stop and immediately crouched to release his feet from the spinning circle and secure the panel in place.
The RV pulled into a rest stop along the turnpike. When I stepped out into the fresh air, I noticed an overlook. We'd hit one of those rare and illustrious times when a clean, well-equipped rest stop with a fabulous view wasn't swarming with tourists and road trippers. Archie headed to the bathroom, and Ally and Pip made their way to the vending machines.
If there was one thing Ally couldn't resist during a road trip, it was a vending machine. When we were younger, she used to keep a zippered bag full of quarters in the glove compartment in case she pulled off at a rest stop. No other vending machine would do. It had to be a rest stop during a road trip, possibly one in a hotel in certain circumstances.
I left Splinter sleeping in a little ball and headed to the overlook by myself. I wanted a few moments to breathe and let everything sink into my mind. The sheer enormity of the world took my breath away as I looked out at the view. I wondered how many times I'd seen this exact scene or one like it and didn't bother to notice it. After escaping The Deep, I never wanted that to happen again. I couldn't take anything for granted anymore, and the ten years in the filthy, cramped, subterranean prison made everything look so big.
The view stretched out in front of me like it went on forever. It was beautiful with the sun streaming through it that I wanted to reach out and touch it. My mind wandered to Solon. I was trying to imagine what he would think of this scenery and me standing in it when Ally walked up.
"What are you thinking about over here all by yourself, Slick? If there's a way to consider Pip a travel accessory and keep her in the glove compartment?"
"I hadn't quite gotten there yet, but I'll stand behind that choice. I'm thinking about Solon.”
"You haven't told me much about him," Ally led.
"There wasn't a ton to tell.” I sighed. "I don't think I knew a lot about him. Some, obviously. We spent a lot of time together, but he was always very…well, guarded about himself."
"Then why did he help you? You didn't tell me why he saved you or why he put so much sacrifice into training you." She turned and leaned against the railing.
I shook my head slightly. "I never found out. He never explained why he saved me or why he spent so much time with me, training me. I was a loyal student, and he was a great teacher, but talking about his thoughts and feelings wasn’t exactly his strong point. He was so mysterious. But I'd like to think he would be proud of me for what I've done."
She turned back to sling her arm around my shoulders and squeeze me close.
"Of course, he is. You've taken all his training and brought it to a new level. He would think you’re incredible, Slick. Something all of us already know,” she teased.
I sighed and let my head rest on her shoulder as we continued to stare out over the view.
"What are we going to do?" I eventually asked.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"About the end of the world. We can't go to the cops. We'd end up with our recorded phone conversation with the dispatcher splashed all over every news channel. And if they did believe us, they wouldn't have any way to help us. I can't go to the Philosophers. Their field agents are after me, and Bentham made it clear they’re still very much coming for me."
"What are you saying?" She rested her head against mine briefly.
I lifted my head off her shoulder. "There's no one who can stop this but us."
"Can we do it? Can we stay strong enough?" Ally asked.
I rested my head against hers. "I don't know. But we have to try."
Chapter Nine
Archie blinked at me a few times. I could tell he wasn't quite on the train with me, yet. I did my best to explain the plan formulating in my head, but it seemed the formulation wasn't quite finished and he didn't pick up on the fine nuances of what I had in mind. Either that, or there weren't any fine nuances and I had no idea what I was talking about. I went with the first option to keep myself trucking along.
"Explain that to me one more time," he said.
"She thinks we should go to the peace summit," Pip told him.
He nodded. "No, I got that. I'm not sure I got the rest of it."
There wasn't really a rest of it. But if there was one thing I was good at, it was faking it ’til I made it.
"We’ll fly to the summit, try to contact Senator Cabot, then hopefully explain the situation. From there, we rescue her and save the world,” I concluded.
"Just like that, huh?"
"Essentially." I gave a matter-of-fact nod.
So, it wasn't the most thought-out and detailed of plans ever created. I didn't have a lot of time to work on it. And for short notice, I thought it was brilliant.
"What I don’t understand is what Senator Cabot has to do with any of this," Ally pointed out. "Why would Hobbes and any of his creepy little minions want her? Don't they usually go for a more blunt approach to utter chaos and destruction? Political espionage is outright weird for them.”
"Yes, but that hasn’t really worked out for them so far. Not against us." I let out a sigh and the shoulders I had pulled back proudly sagged a little. "I wanted that to sound a lot more compelling than it did."
"I thought it was compelling," Pip offered. "You're like your very own group of superheroes!"
"Not the first time we've heard that," I commented. "I appreciate the fangirl support, but it looks more and more like us being able to ward off the Farsiders Hobbes has in his pocket has only resulted in him latching onto humans. I didn't escape from the Deep and go after the Guild and Hobbes to serve up humans on a silver platter, and this will move so many more people into his camp."
Archie cringed. "I know that's a metaphor for you, but I know some people who would be very interested in that proposition. Maybe we should use a different analogy."
I looked at him for a long second. "Gross. But, fine. I didn't go through all that to make it here so they could destroy the human world like this."
"I thought your whole reason for escaping from
prison was to clear your name," Ally said.
"Hurtful, Ally." She tilted her head at me, unconvinced by my wide, innocent eyes. "I army-crawled and Philosopher-bashed my way out of Hell's timeout closet to figure out why they framed my father for heinous crimes, but it's not only about that. Now that I know how big this thing really is, I can't let it keep going. Hobbes is ready to take out the world. I can't let that happen. There is too much good left in this world. Too much happiness and beauty and love and amazement."
"And tacos,” Archie added.
"Yes, Archie, thank you,” I acknowledged. “And tacos. There might be a lot of nasty grimy bad shit that happens every day, but it's not enough to make the world not worth existing. I don't know who the fuck Hobbes thinks he is, but he won’t blot out all of existence on my watch."
"Yaaaaaaaay!" Pip cheered.
"Okay, Norma Ray. That was inspiring, but it didn't really answer my question. Why would Hobbes want to attack Cabot? This peace summit has nothing to do with Farsiders. If anything, it could alert the world’s leaders to them if they attacked. Why would Hobbes want to bring the heat of the entire planet down on himself?" Ally asked.
"Maybe that's the point. Senator Cabot is a respected leader. People will look at her for insight and motivation. Maybe everyone's waiting for something amazing to happen. That's how politicians roll. They'll hang out in the background all quiet and unassuming, shaking hands, signing papers, kissing babies and then BAM,” I threw my hands out in a sharp gesture, “they're playing Flight of the Valkyries while moseying down the street in a tank. It's all about the anticipation."
"It's a peace summit, Slick. I don't think it will involve any tanks," Ally pointed out.
"Even so. This is the perfect time for her to emerge triumphant and make a big impact. Maybe that's what everyone is expecting. All the attention will be on her, so when Hobbes attacks, it will be public and dramatic, and it would be so demoralizing for Hobbes to destroy a peace summit that a war between The Far and The Near would start out with The Far having the psychological advantage. Pip already said the baddies are preparing for war. It's coming soon, and they'll want to make a big deal out of it. This is their opening salvo, and we need to be there to stop it. Otherwise, not only will Cabot get hurt, but the war between The Far and The Near will start with them drawing first blood."
"All right," Archie said with a bit of an edge to his voice. "I guess it's settled. Let's get ready. What kind of gear will we need for this plan?"
"Isn't that kind of your jam? You're our gear dude.” I waved my hand at him like I was anointing him.
His eyes slid over to me and I quickly realized he didn’t appreciate his new unofficial title. I would have to keep working on it.
"I can't spontaneously come up with a list of things we need for something when I don't know exactly what we'll have to do.” Grumpy Archie wasn’t letting up.
“I haven’t exactly made it a habit to attend peace summits, Archie, so I don’t really know what to expect," I told him.
"Great. Well, I can come up with a list of basic materials that would help us in a wide range of situations. I can't guarantee it will contain everything we might need, but it will give us a good chance. Of course, sourcing those things is a different story,” he warned.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"It won’t be easy. The number of quality people who are willing to sell to us is dwindling. It probably doesn't come as much of a surprise to you that we’re developing a bit of a reputation. There aren't a lot of dealers around who want their names tied up with Sara Slick,” he pointed out.
"Okay. Well, that's too bad for them.” I wanted to hit an emphatic pose but couldn’t think of one that wouldn’t make me feel like Peter Pan.
"It's too bad for us, too. We can't simply stroll into the grocery store and ask them where their Farstuff department is," Archie snipped.
"But we can rely on them to have a good supply of Nearstuff.” I grinned at him.
His grumpy face didn't change. "Silver lining."
I sagged a little. "We need this, Archie. We've been flailing around for how long now? We're trying to bring Hobbes down before he can wipe out life as we know it, and right now, the best we have to go on is what Pip heard. It might not make sense to us, but we don't really have the luxury of choosing what we follow-up on. If we don't do this, it could be disastrous."
"All right," he gave in. "I can give you a list of the supplies we need before we travel. It’ll take at least a few days to get everything, then probably another couple of days to get there if we want to stay under the radar."
He walked back to his lab and pulled a pad of paper and pen from a drawer. While hunched over the counter, he started scribbling, tore off the page, and scribbled on another. This didn't seem like it would be a super-fast process, so I turned to Pip. The young Lizard Person sat at the edge of the cushion on the couch, primed and ready for whatever would happen. She didn't seem anxious or worried, but more excited about what was coming.
Her little green head turned and glanced around as she took in all the details of our customized RV.
"Pip?" I leaned slightly toward her.
"Hmm?" Her eyes snapped to me like she almost forgot I was there beside her.
"You doing okay? With all this?" I gestured around to encompass Archie, Ally, and me.
She smiled. "Absolutely. This place is great. I've never seen anything like it."
"No one has ever seen anything like it," Ally commented.
"I meant the whole your species getting kidnapped and facing down an impending war thing,” I clarified.
"Oh." Her smile faltered a little, and her eyes moved to stare directly in front of her. She thought for a few seconds, and there was no sound in the RV except Archie scratching away at the paper. "Um. Yeah. I'm okay. I'm glad I was able to find you. Now that I have, I know everything will be all right."
“So,” I began, trying to figure out how to delicately broach the subject, “is there anywhere you would want us to drop you off?”
“Drop me off?” she asked.
“I mean, you obviously can’t come with us—”
“Why not?” she interjected, her hands going to her hips and an edge creeping into her voice before backing down a little. “You could use someone like me, you know? Besides, I hate my family, and humans are difficult to be around without wanting to gnaw their faces off. Present company excluded.”
“Thanks?” Ally cocked her head to the side.
“I mean, most humans suck almost as much as my family. No one in The Far is friendly to people like me. Plus, I really like the idea of doing something good for once. And here you are, Sara Slick, saving the universe. I want to be part of that.” She blinked.
No pressure.
"All right. I have the lists," Archie announced.
I was still locked in a staring contest with Pip, who stared imploringly back. Finally, I nodded once, and a smile stretched across her face. Despite myself, a small smile stretched across mine too. I turned to Archie.
"Lists? With an 's?’" I asked.
"Yeah. I told you, since I don't know exactly what's going on or what we should expect, I don't know everything we'll need. I came up with the best list of Nearsider stuff and Farsider stuff I could. It's a little random, but it will give me the flexibility I need. With these things, I can make a bunch of different stuff depending on what we end up encountering. But that means it's not a short list and if we want to head to the summit anytime soon, we need to divide and conquer."
"Go, team. So, who's doing what?" I asked.
"Ally, I have you doing the Nearsider stuff. Follow the list and bring back everything you can get your hands on,” he instructed. “I really need the top ten things there, and we may as well not go if I can’t get them. Everything else ranges from necessary, but maybe I can find there, to something to keep Pip quiet while I do something important.”
He offered a page to Ally, who took it and scanned it
.
She nodded. "Duct tape, kitchen shears, a pack of twelve-volt batteries… I get those. But the heels off a pair of stilettos? A blue-eyed teddy bear? Fourteen green M&Ms? A melon-baller?”
“I need it,” Archie said weakly.
“Why?” I asked.
“I just do.”
There was a moment of uncomfortable silence before Ally shook her head.
“Okay, fine, yeah. I can get this stuff,” she said.
"Great. Slick, you're on Farsider stuff." He held a list out to me.
"Of course, I am." I snatched the paper from his hand and looked at it. "What else would you make me do?"
"You're more familiar with these things than Ally is. You're also more comfortable dealing with the type of people who sell them,” he explained.
"And what are you going to get?" I looked around, trying to find his list.
"Passports."
"Passports," I repeated flatly.
"Do you have one?" He gave me a smug look.
I opened my mouth, then closed it. "No."
"Neither do I. Neither does Pip." He gestured at the lizard girl, who smiled.
"I do." Ally lifted one hand.
Archie pointed at her. "Still getting you a fake one. We don't want anyone able to track us. I know someone who makes passports for Farsiders all the time. It's a common need for us. We can't get real identification, so we always need fakes. He'll make us ones that we can use for the flight and access to the peace summit."
"I'll come with you!" Pip exclaimed. "I want to come up with my fake name."
"You don't have to have a fake name,” he told her.
"But I want one." Her pout almost made her adorable.
"Okay. You can have a fake name," Archie relented, already exasperated by his biggest fan.
He looked over at me, his eyes pleading for me to pry her away from him and take her with me. I grinned.
"Have a great time! Meet back here soon." I hopped up and bounced out of the RV, only to return a second later. "I'll probably need a ride. And to know where I'm going."
