by S King
Me and Luminous had lost each other once, thinking it was the answer that was required for both of us to survive. But seeing as to how it wasn’t. Well, Judge Sadvidge and whoever else could just eat maggots for all I cared.
Sure the two of us were going to play the political game laid out by the honorable judges. But we were going to play it by our own rules and God have mercy on anyone who thought they could interfere or stop us.
Chapter 11 River of Promises
Sun fading. Hunger growing. Sleep inevitable. I let my head roll to the side as I felt the cool glass of the window against my skin. Somewhere in the ride back to Castlehedge I had dozed off. Probably thanks to losing all of my adrenaline in a matter of an hour.
Sighing, I stretched and looked at the darkened road ahead of us. The Hummer was silent with the exception of Dristan’s soft snoring and Karina’s mumbling in her sleep. Music wasn’t flitting through the speakers and the windows weren’t down to circulate the somewhat comfortable air within the cabin.
“Sleep ok?” Demir’s husky voice broke through my analyzing thoughts.
I nodded and sat up straighter in the seat, “do I need to drive?”
He snorted, covering the move with a cough and shook his head. “No, I can manage.”
“What? You think I can’t do it?” I challenged.
He raised a brow at me, the light from the dash casting light blue shadows across his hard face.
“Do you know where we’re going?”
I opened my mouth but quickly snapped it shut. I didn’t know where we were going. Which would be kind of beneficial considering we couldn’t stay in the truck forever.
Slumping back in the seat, I grumbled under my breath. “I didn’t want to drive anyway.”
Demir’s big hand formed in my line of sight, taking my own hand in his, he kissed my knuckles. For a moment we fell into silence; maybe the two of us were trying to find the words we had been robbed of during the time we had been separated. Maybe we were just enjoying the feel of each other’s skin. But no matter the reason, I needed to focus my mind on something other than the obvious worry creeping its way up my spine and into my mind.
“What’s happened since…” I said, stopping myself from repeating the words I couldn’t bear to shove into his face. It was a cruel reminder to how we had come here and the less I had to deal with the phantom pain of my stab wound the better.
He shifted in his seat and narrowed his eyes for a moment.
“Well, as you know, I’m a judge now. Not that it’s any reason to be proud of.” He added the last part as an afterthought before clearing his throat. “Naturally, those two,” he nodded to the backseat, “have officially became a thing.”
“And you haven’t told the other judges?”
“No, I wouldn’t do that. I did, however, change the laws about it.”
I frowned, staring at his side-profile.
“Don’t give me that look. I was doing it as a favor to my best friend. Had you been in my shoes you’d have done the same.”
I rolled my eyes and looked out the window. It was true. Had I become a judge in the black courts I’d have changed a lot of things the other judges wouldn’t have known about until it was too late.
“Did he hurt you or try anything?”
“Who?” My head snapped around to look at Demir again.
Unlike when I had first woken up, the shadows covering his face weren’t from the dash or the few passing headlights. No, these shadows were from a darker, sinister place within the man who had occupied my mind for nearly my entire life.
“Shang Wylan,” he bit out the name as if it held some type of bitter poison on each letter.
Dropping my eyes to the floorboard, I shook my head, “no, Demir, he didn’t do anything.” Lies. All lies. The one thing Shang did do was the very thing he shouldn’t have done.
Then again what the hell was I feeling guilty about? Demir had his own lip wrestling match with someone other than me. So didn’t that mean everything was fair? However, in my mind I knew I was in the wrong.
He had given me no reason what so ever to find fault in his actions. Outside of the stabbing incident. But still. At the end, right before the blade punched through my stomach, he had offered me an out. He had told me to kill him on the edge of that cliff and I had refused. So, yet again, Demir wasn’t entirely at fault.
“Luminous,” his voice stopped my internal trial and brought my eyes to meet his. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” I said a little too quickly. Even I wasn’t buying the single worded answer as the truth. And if I wasn’t buying it and it came from my mouth, how in the living hell did I expect Demir to believe it?
The Hummer slowed down, until we were sitting in the middle of a beaten path. I knew better than to look at him. Judging from the tension wafting from the left side of the vehicle to the right, there was a suffocating beast wrapping its tendrils around my throat. He was staring at me and he wasn’t going to move until he got the answer he wanted. The truth.
“What happened?” He asked slowly. The fear of a thousand theories running through each word slowly escaping his mouth.
“We kissed and nothing more.” I deadpanned.
Looking straight ahead, I tried to think of rainbows and butterflies. In reality, I was afraid of very few things in my life. Death? I had laughed in the face of the grim reaper. A Black Diamond Order? Beat that. The judges of Onyx Elite? Ha, I killed two of them. But none of those incidents compared to the lasers coming from Demir’s eyes, burning a hole through my skull.
“When?” He bit out. A warning for me to choose my answer wisely. On the bright side, Talay wasn’t here to call me out on any bullshit.
“The other day.”
“When, Luminous?”
A muscle in my jaw betrayed me by jumping. “Right before—”
He kicked out of the driver’s seat and slammed the door so hard, the big SUV shook. Honestly, I was surprised the window didn’t shatter. Demir’s strength was like that of an ox on a good day. But when he was fired up and ready for bear? Well, it wouldn’t surprise me if he could take down ten skyscrapers and bring the Titanic back to the surface.
“You shut up!” Dristan bolted out of his seat and looked around blurry eyed.
Rolling my eyes, I got out of the Hummer and pulled my jacket closer even though the wind wasn’t blowing. Clenching my teeth together, I forced my body forward. The pain in my foot was warning me to just sit down in the road and not get up until I grew a pair of wings. But I couldn’t obey my body’s command. This was a conversation we needed to have and if push came to shove. I still had my whip strapped to my back.
“Demir, look…”
“You’re still pissed about what happened in the club. Yet and still,” he spread his arms wide and chuckled under his breath. “You kissed the very person who is ordered to deliver you to the courts!”
I tried to remain calm. Having both of us standing in the middle of the road, hollering at each other would solve nothing. But I wasn’t so calm to allow him to belittle me like I was some two bit whore who had taken more than I should have.
Lifting my eyes to meet his, I asked.
“Who signed off on the order, Demir?”
Narrowing his eyes, he growled through clenched teeth, “an order needs to be unanimous among the voting judges, Luminous. I don’t have that power.”
“But you handed it down?”
“God damn it Luminous! I’m playing both ends of the field right now! What the hell do you want from me? While I’m risking my neck with the courts, what’re you doing? You’re kissing some other guy!”
“You’re not innocent!” I snapped.
“Yes, we know! I kissed the blonde bombshell in Nine Lives! She manipulated my emotions just like Lovett can—could!” He corrected, “what’s your excuse?”
“I…” I dropped my eyes and bit my lip.
My mother had always said there were three sides to every story
. Mine, yours and the truth. Had I known what the woman was cursed with, maybe I could’ve understood the entire situation instead of relying heavily on what my eyes had seen that night.
“Well?” He snapped, glaring at me like I had grown two purple heads and a green tail.
What was my excuse? Shang had kissed me and what had I done? I kissed him back with just as much vigor. Shang couldn’t manipulate emotions or force someone into doing his bidding—that much I had known. So, pulling the whole devil made me do it line wouldn’t play in my favor.
I adverted my eyes and stared into the darkness as Demir tilted his head, trying to get a read on me.
“You’ve got nothing?” He accused.
And I didn’t. I had no excuse, no rhyme or reason behind the why of kissing Shang. Yet again, I was a victim of my own doing and didn’t have a leg to stand on.
When I didn’t say anything Demir scoffed in disgust.
“I tread on a thin ass line to save you from our past and this is the thanks I get?”
For some reason, his words had hurt worse than getting stabbed. Worse than falling from the cliff. Worse than watching my friends die in front of me.
“You have no clue to what I’ve had to do in order to keep all of our heads attached. Yet and still, you went off and attached yourself to someone you know nothing about and then play the fucking victim.” He scoffed again, looking at the sky for a second. “At least I had the premise to hold on to the promise I made you.” He finally said looking at me with disgust, distrust, and downright disappointment burning through those gold-silver eyes of his.
“I didn’t ask you to save me! I didn’t ask you to do any of those things! All of the points you just listed off were by your own conviction! Do you want the truth, Demir? You should’ve just left me the fuck alone!” I snapped, instantly regretting the words.
For the briefest of seconds, I saw the type of damage my mouth was capable of doing. The damn words had cut worse than my razor wire whip. It was true, two wrongs didn’t make a right, but as karma would have it. She got the final laugh.
The type of resolve that you never wanted to see in your lover came over Demir’s face and in a dead tone he said.
“You’re right, I should have.” His face became an unreadable mask as he looked past my shoulder to his Hummer for a second before focusing on me again. “Don’t worry, I’ve learned my lesson.”
“Demir, I—”
“Get in the truck, Slade’s waiting,” he walked past me. The earlier sweetness gone from his entire demeanor.
Closing my eyes, I heavily considered taking a dagger from Dristan only to cut out my own tongue. It was a nice idea, but it would serve me no purpose in the future. I wasn’t the type of female to be mute and didn’t want to be forced to live in a silent world.
Besides the two of us had the tempers of the devil himself and with enough time. Maybe, just maybe, we could have a simple heart to heart. Eventually. But now wasn’t the time and in truth, neither of us had sorry within our vocabulary.
Sighing, I pushed my hair from my face before gritting my teeth together and walked to the back passenger seat.
“Karina, switch places with me.” It wasn’t a request, and I wasn’t oblivious to the windows being rolled up.
Between Karina and Dristan I didn’t know who was worse about listening in on someone else’s argument or finding humor in the fighting matches of others. Hell, Karina and Dristan went as far as to make wagers about who would win the fight. Who would throw the lowest blow. And who would apologize first.
Had the argument with Demir been staged, I’d have said hands down he won and forced my sister to pay up on her end. But the fight wasn’t staged. And I wasn’t in the mood to try and remedy the situation. Not now. Maybe not ever.
“Yeah,” for once my sister didn’t say anything.
I stepped aside while she got out and didn’t say anything to Dristan as I took his girlfriend’s place in the Hummer.
Things had spiraled out of control and while I was grateful for their efforts, I should have just stayed with Shang and Fefe. Afterall, it wasn’t like I was doing Demir, Karina or Dristan any favors by allowing them to hide me from the courts. Although I wanted to convince myself Shang and Fefe wouldn’t hand me over to the scientists, I didn’t know them well enough to be comfortable with going back. At least, not just yet.
Demir shifted the SUV into drive and started maneuvering through the paths as everyone within the metal cage fell to the downfalls of their own thoughts. Nobody breathed or made a move to try to break the tension in the car. Instead, we opted for the safest route. Staying silent.
As I turned to look out the window, I was thankful for the black tinted glass. None of the lighting from the dash broke through the sides of the seat and thanks to the isolated road we were travelling down. I was free to wallow in my regrets and misdeeds.
Thanks to my stupid, razor sharp quick tongue I had severed any possible hope of everything being ok. Looking back on the argument in the middle of the road, I was forced to acknowledge the truth.
I couldn’t stay with Demir, Karina and Dristan. I couldn’t go back to Shang and Fefe. And while the thoughts crashed into the forefront of my mind, Shang’s words were the most prominent.
“What’s your biggest fear? What’re you most afraid of?”
Even though I had a vague feeling he already knew the answer, I had refused to tell him the truth. I had tried to block out my emotions and the images. But now? Of all times, my reality didn’t try to slow down it’s explosion in my mind.
Hidden behind layers I had built over the years and tucked away in the furthest part of my mind. I knew my fear of being utterly and completely alone had finally come true. I couldn’t stay with anyone from Castlehedge, and I wasn’t going to go back to Springcrest for Fefe’s sake.
Salty, regretful tears slipped from my eyes in a silent cadence. The truth was, for the first time in an extremely long time I felt truly alone, and the feeling was only going to grow as soon as I left Demir and the others behind after Slade healed my busted foot.
§§§§§
“Thanks Slade,” I mumbled and tried to smile at him.
The corner of his mouth ticked up in a smirk, but he didn’t say anything. Instead, he stepped back and surveyed my healed foot as if he were looking at a piece of Ikea furniture that may or may not stay put together.
I stared down at my hands, not wanting to say anything that may come back to bite me in the ass. God knows I had done enough of that earlier tonight to fill an ocean.
“Get some rest, Luminous.” Slade finally looked at me and grabbed his jacket from the bed.
“Thanks again,” I nodded and stood on my newly recovered limb.
“Don’t mention it, I’m sure you’d have done the same for me had the tables been turned.” He winked at me and left the room, closing the door with a soft click.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I looked around the spare bedroom Demir had motioned for me to go into to get changed. Other than telling me where the towels and extra blankets were he didn’t tell me anything else. Instead, he simply left the room and didn’t look back.
Not that I could blame him. When we were standing there in the middle of the road, yelling our lungs out to the brink of explosion neither of us were thinking rationally. Between the stress of nearly dying for the whatever number of time we were facing to knowing we weren’t entirely safe from PG snitching on us. Tempers were running high, and words were flying carelessly.
Turning off the light beside the bed, I closed the curtains. Committing my plan to leave without a trace to memory, I slipped under the soft black covers and stared out the window.
After a few hours of sleep, I’d get my bag of clothes, leave him a note to thank him for the hospitality and apologize for the words I had let fly from my mouth. Then I’d high tail my ass away from Castlehedge and anything that looked like it could have any guard members around.
It sounded lik
e a reasonable enough plan, but who was I kidding? As soon as I had seen Karina standing there ready to blow Shang sky high, I was ready to come back home. I was ready to see Demir and tell him how I hadn’t truly cared about him kissing the other woman. I was only momentarily hurt—as any would be and I understood why he had done it. Even though he wasn’t really kissing the other woman on his own conviction.
There was a soft knock at the door as I started drifting off to sleep. Opening my eyes, I found the alarm clock and frowned. I had been asleep for nearly twenty hours.
For whatever reason, I had forgotten what came along with Slade’s healing ability. The after effects of having your body traumatized and then forced back to normal would deplete anyone’s energy.
Thankfully, the man knew how to heal someone and force them to rest. A benefit, I’ll admit. But now that I had woken up and was pushing my body from the bed, I remembered my plan. I needed to get out of here; whether it was because I was trying to save everyone else or just myself, I knew I couldn’t stay here.
“Come in,” I scrubbed my hands over my face and tried to think of a way to get around Karina’s watchful eyes.
She’d know deep down I wasn’t going to stay after fighting with Demir as badly as I had. She also knew I wouldn’t want her to teach Demir a lesson for his harsh words. Both he and I were at fault and killing him wouldn’t solve anything.
The door opened for a quick second before closing again but there was no other movement. Had I been in the shoddy motel I’d have turned around with my whip in hand and swung the thing without thinking twice. But I was in Demir’s house. High in the mountains and away from any accessible roads or rivers.
Glancing over my shoulder, I froze. Not out of fear or intimidation. But because it was as if the person standing at the door with his back resting comfortably on the wooden barrier had read my mind about my escape plan.
“Look Demir—”
