“What was that?”
“This isn’t about you. This is about Nathan.” He points to himself.
I grimace.
“What?” He tangles our fingers. “What’s wrong?”
“You said that when you tricked me.”
“That wasn’t me, again, and what do you mean?”
“The same persuasive tone, those words.” They play back in my mind. “When the guy cut me, that’s what he said.”
Nathan thinks for a moment or maybe looks in my head. We sit quietly until he says, “I’ll worry about it tomorrow.”
That doesn’t give me much of whatever conclusion he came up with, or if he came up with anything. I try to wrap my head around Nathan’s father and his mixed personalities. “All of that was a front, wasn’t it?”
“He has no plans of talking with us. Rather, I don’t intend to speak with him. Not with you in the room.”
The distant Nathan is back, just when he’d eased and started opening up. “Why not with me in the room?”
“I would say things and behave in a way I don’t want you to see.”
“And what, by you doing so, will make my perspective of you change?”
“That’s not what I’m saying.”
“Then what are you saying?”
“I have no respect for my father. I don’t care about hurting him. I don’t use control when I deal with him.” He looks toward the yard, beating his leg with his fist.
“Can you give me more?” I probe.
“Tracey, this isn’t a conversation I’m ready to have right now.”
“Why do you hold things back from me?”
His hand moves about as he says, “My life is complicated. My relationship with my father isn’t like others. How would it sound to you if I said I want to kill my father, and every time I try, the only thing that saves him is my mother? That I don’t mind losing control around him in hopes that I’ll murder him, with no doubts or regrets?” A promise lies deep in his eyes.
“But if you murder your father, won’t you kill your mother?”
He drags his gaze away. “No. She’ll live, but she’ll be miserable and out of character.”
“I’m confused. Can’t one not live without the other?”
“The female can live without the male, but not the other way around. Remember, your heart beats in replacement of mine. So, if I die, your heart will still beat. But if you die, then that’s it for the both of us.”
That is some crazy shit.
“If I’m hurt, you can always heal me, and I, you. You may also feel my pain now.”
I push my arm around his neck, taking that in. “For the record, I don’t think you took advantage of me. I’m here because I want to be. I mean, if it weren’t for the mating and the bond, the reassurance wouldn’t be there, and the knowledge wouldn’t be there that I belong here. I wouldn’t have fallen for you so quickly, on the other hand, I may have. I would’ve grown to love you, and nothing would be different. We’d more than likely move a lot slower. I guess I’m saying all this to say, you don’t have to apologize for someone else’s behavior or think that one day I’ll jump up and decide I don’t want to do this. And don’t let your mom get you down about us bonding. You wouldn’t take advantage of me. And I know yesterday was more about you, and not about me.”
He takes a breath. “I left you after the fair because you showed me some of you is like me. I wasn’t sure if one of my traits had instilled in you because of the bond, but I realized, like me, you have a small anger problem, which was there before we were bound. Like how you have to keep me anchored, I have to level you, and like how you want me to understand and respect why you calm me down or keep me from some things, I need you to do the same for me.” He lifts my hand, studying my palm. “You’ll start showing signs of strength and endurance. You may get abilities, which is likely because of who I am. When you do decide to join my family, you’ll be included in on our internal conversations, but I wouldn’t look forward to that if I were you. Nobody wants to hear them talk out loud or in their heads.” His eyes swirl full brown. “Don’t let my father change your mind about me and my family.”
“I like your family. Your dad won’t change my mind about anything. I’ll treat him like Glen treats her step-dad. Ignore him.” Crap! Glen! “Have you talked to Scott today?”
“No, but I’m sure that means they’re getting along. If not, they’d be with us. You want to go inside and close my bedroom door?”
I chuckle. “If we can avoid your little brother. He’s always sliding in little comments.”
Nathan slouches on the bench, looking up at the rafters. “What makes that so funny is he has more girls in his room than I had when I was his age.”
“And how old is he, really?”
“Twenty-eight.”
“Wow, he looks sixteen. Doesn’t it seem weird, you being old, dating me, and my being decades younger than you?”
“Um, I hadn’t paid attention to it.” We stand. “Probably because I’ve spent so much of my life adjusting to the age that I portray and growing with it. Three years to you is like one year to me. It feels natural.”
He’s right, it sounds weird, but it feels natural. Likely because of the mating controlling everything. I sigh, accepting it. “What are you going to do tomorrow while you’re not spending your time with me?” I swing our hands as we head to his house.
He spins me around, like a dance move, where I end up in front of him with my back to his chest. “I will go to the office, check on things, and put in some work. Then I’ll search for Eddlen, find out what his connection is to my father, and kill him. Then I’ll come back home, talk to my father about his performance tonight, tell him whatever Eddlen will tell me before he died, and then fight with him. Then I’ll wrap up my night at your house after you come home from being out with your parents.”
I’m shocked he didn’t hesitate to tell me. Although, my heart skipped a beat when he said kill him. I push the back door open and head for his room, avoiding running into anyone. “Is the bonding different for you than it is for me?”
“Very,” he answers, closing the bedroom door behind him.
“How so?”
He walks over to his desk, and I follow, sitting on his bed. “For starters, it makes me way too protective. Every inch of your body is mine. Like, I can feel you breathe, taste the food and drinks that slide over your tongue, as you inhale I breathe the exact same air even when you’re not around me.” He points to the bed. “The cushion, I feel it on my ass as if I were sitting there in place of you. The clothes on your body, the polyester fabric, brushes my skin. Your hair rests on my neck. Every ounce, inch, organ, thought, sight, rumble in your stomach . . . it is all a part of me. So, I battle separating myself from you, and it’s hard as shit. I suspect I’ll overcome it. Eventually I’ll be able to tap into you when I want instead of me being you all the time. If that makes any sense.” He scrapes his nails across his forehead as he shakes his head. “That among other things is annoying. Not that you’re annoying, just that I can’t focus on myself. I’m lost somewhere in here,” he says, gesturing to his body.
“Wow, I don’t even feel you that way. It’s just a deep, very deep yearning for you.” I rub my arms, resisting the sudden need to have his arms around me.
Grumbling, Nathan adds, “It’s kinda killing me knowing I have to leave you alone tomorrow, especially considering someone has already tracked you down and tried to hurt you to get to me.”
“Oh, and you bring that up! I already don’t want to go. Lay down with me. Maybe we can try watching that movie again, and I’ll stay over Saturday. School starts again on Monday.”
Sitting on the bed, he says, “Which is why us being apart is good, especially this soon after us bonding. I want you to be able to have time away from me and get used to the claiming. Just now is not a good time. But I’ll do what I can to change that. Don’t you miss spending time with your friends? Going out, doing things
you were doing before I stole you away?”
“I replaced it with something better, so I don’t recognize missing it.” I untie my shoes.
He stops me and does it for me. “What would that be?”
“It’s not a what. It’s a who.” I climb up on the bed and wave him over.
Nathan kicks off his shoes and snatches up the remote from the TV stand. “See, the bonding’s talking already. Bet you didn’t even recognize their absence until I mentioned it.”
I purse my lips. “Maybe.”
He climbs onto the bed, and I notice the worry line lying on his eyebrows. It comes and goes, but is there most of the time.
Nathan flicks the TV on with the movie starting. I snuggle up next to him, and he rubs my back under my shirt. It soothes me as I listen to my heartbeat and I sigh, acknowledging we’re epically peaceful.
inhibited
“Tracey, wake up, it’s getting late. We need to get you home.”
I’m not asleep, just lying here, listening . . . thinking. “No, Nathan. Let me stay.”
“I would, but your mother would worry about you, or assume you’re out with me doing un-lady-like activities,” he jokes.
“Maybe.” I stretch. It’s amazing how comfortable I am around him. Like, pick your nose kind of comfortable.
“You better not pick your nose, Tracey.”
I laugh, slapping his chest. “Would you get out of my head! What time is it?”
He chuckles, looking over at the nightstand. “A little after nine.”
“Hey, guys.” Taylor comes in, closing the door behind her.
“Hi,” I greet.
She sits on the desk chair and snatches up Nathan’s hand grips. “I’m sorry about earlier, Tracey. I hope our asshole father didn’t get to you. Or what I said the other day,” she adds warily. “See, my brother is stronger than I know. Whatever’s put in front of him, he undertakes, and it was wrong for me to say that if he ever loses control around you to leave him alone. Rather, if Nathan ever loses control, stand by his side and do whatever you need to, to keep him anchored. I love my brother, Tracey, and you’ll be good for him. He’s different around you, happy and fulfilled.” She nods, giving me a soft grin.
Taylor’s genuine, and I like her, my favorite of his favorites. “Thank you, Taylor.”
“Nathan, I know why your father was acting facetiously. He doesn’t want you to bond because of the change it’ll make in you and the acceleration. We are bound.” Must be her and Justin, I believe is her mate’s name.
Nathan’s eyes widen as he sits forward.
“He found out and spazzed, charging me. His punches were tickles and when I laughed, he shot me.”
Nathan scoots to the edge of the bed. “He did what?” he asks in disgust.
“That’s not the worst part. It’s what he shot me with.”
I move behind Nathan, sitting up on my knees, and wrap my arms around his neck to calm his angst. I didn’t realize what I was doing until I did it.
Taylor smiles, watching us.
Nathan sighs aloud, half-relieved and half-frustrated. “Can you finish, Taylor?”
She nods. “He shot me with hollow-tip bullets filled with pearl shards.” My mouth falls open, and Nathan reddens with anger. “It was the worst pain. They tore through my skin, leaving pieces of pearl inside me. Four times.” She throws up four fingers.
Nathan waves his hand in front of himself. “Stop, Taylor. Don’t tell me anything else.” His anger pulses through him, and I kiss his neck, hoping to calm him. He leans his head against mine and rubs my arm. “Thank you, baby,” he sighs, facing me. I kiss him his you’re welcome, quick, soft, and sweet.
“Little brother, I don’t mean to upset you, but I need to tell you both this.” She waits before continuing. “I was lying on the floor. I guess he had thought I would finally die. But Justin came to rescue me. He fought off your father, which didn’t take much, picked me up, and carried me from the room. As we were leaving, your father mouthed ‘he won’t be around to rescue you for long.’ It took hours to get the bullets out and to remove the pearl. Justin never took his hand from me out of fear of me dying. But I quickly healed after all the shards were out. You could never imagine what we went through, Nathan.” Her hand trembles, and she goes back to squeezing the hand grips.
“I take it there’s more, and that was the easy part?” Nathan says in an even voice, observing his sister’s anxious demeanor.
My brain is still registering her being shot!
Taylor lets out an even breath. “Last week, while you were gone, he tried to kill Justin.” Tears pool in her eyes as she forces herself to finish. “He snuck up behind us and stabbed him in the back, right in his spine. I felt the knife cut through him, and the paralyzing feeling of the pearl-coated blade rubbing against his tissues and bones. Justin’s full eyes turned black, his hair grew out black and long, his teeth sharpened and stretched out, and his hands darkened. Even as I held him, he was slipping away from me. Mother and Roseland walked in at the same moment your father was going for another stab at his neck. I’d blacked out, and when I awoke we were in our room, Justin next to me, resting.” She wipes her eyes. Her tears were falling by the boatload, but they’d gone ignored until now.
“Why did Justin’s appearance change?” I ask.
“Justin’s a Hybrid Sephlem,” Nathan explains.
“They can shift into human form?”
Nathan nods. “When he was about to die, he changed back into his true form.”
“I’ll let you go back to whatever it was you were doing. I needed to tell you not to tell your father if you two bond. Especially if you advance. I’ve already spoken with Rose, but I left out the gory details.” Taylor heads to the door, adding, “This is unacceptable, and he is as good as dead to me,” she swears, leaving.
I’m unsure of what to say, or if I should say anything. I wait for Nathan to speak but he doesn’t.
We leave and Nathan runs me home, dropping me off at the door. I head to my room, saying hi to Mom on my way through.
Nathan’s waiting for me on the chaise. He beckons me to him, and I sit on his lap as he pulls me into a kiss. A deep, affectionate caress, filled with passion and promise. Pulling back, I take in his worried expression, brows pulled to their middle and eyes narrowed just enough to hint his contemplation. “Tracey,” he starts, “if my father ever tries to kill you, there’s no stopping me.”
“He won’t kill me, Nathan,” I reassure him.
“He doesn’t have to kill you. He only has to try, and I will know no words.” I lean forward for another kiss. He grabs my sides, holding me back. Concerned, I wait for him to speak. “Let’s go to sleep.”
I wake up cold, throwing the pillow Nathan laid on over my head.
What happened to Taylor is heavy on my mind. How can a father want his children dead, regardless of what they are? If he wouldn’t have tried to kill them, they may like him and not equally want him dead. I don’t want to be a part of something like that. I mean, I want to be with Nathan, but I don’t want to walk around looking over my shoulder, expecting someone to kill me. And I can’t have Nathan without having his dad. His other relatives are fine; they’re happy and full of life and seem to enjoy being around each other and their mates. Their love envelops the room until dear old dad comes in and sucks it out with his hate.
“Tracey!” Dad calls.
“Yes!” I cheer, jumping from the bed. “Dad?” I call, clearing the stairs and heading for the kitchen.
My enthusiastic father grabs me into a hug, and I throw my arms around his slender waist. Like Mom, he carries himself well and is always in good spirits. Nothing’s ever been able to steal his joy. “Hey, Ladybug. How’ve you been?”
I hug him tight, not realizing how much I’ve missed him until I got him in my arms. I break our embrace and step back to look him over. “I’m fine. You look good, Dad.”
He rubs his hands down his shaved cheeks and straightens
his dark blue tie. “Why thank you, my good lady. I try to keep everything in order.”
“Tracey has had a lot going on.” Mom finds the need to inform as she takes his side.
“Yes, so I’ve heard. Your mother told me about this handsome young man who’s supposed to be your boyfriend,” he says, sitting down on the nearest barstool.
My heart contracts at the thought of Nathan. I should have known Mom would tell him. “Um, yes,” I drag.
“What’s his name?”
“Mom told you about him but didn’t tell you his name? You’re a terrible informant, Mom.”
“I want you to tell me,” Dad insists, crossing his arms.
I bite the inside of my lips then say, “Nathan.” His name comes out softer than I intended, with emotion sticking behind it.
“Tracey!” Dad blurts, startling me. “You love this boy!” he says, with just as much enthusiasm.
My eyes bulge. How could he have picked that up by me just saying his name?
“Do you, Tracey?” Mom asks.
I avoid their eyes, not used to having these conversations with my parents. But, I guess it’s about time I make things official with them. I’m eighteen and need to take up my being an adult. I mean, what can they say? No Tracey, you can’t love a boy.
Dad eyes me with his eyebrows touching his hairline, tapping his fingers on the bar. I can’t tell if he’s upset or just taken aback.
“Yes,” I answer, blushing.
His brows lower. “You mind telling me how serious it is?”
Yes, I mind. I’d prefer not to talk about it. I sit on a barstool and play with the fruit in the bowl, avoiding the question.
“Tell me this. How long have you been seeing each other?”
“Last week, I met him at school.” I repeat the story I told Mom, getting that out of the way before he asks.
“Is that enough time to understand those feelings? How can you be so sure you love him if you two have only been together for this short time?”
Plight: A Dark Paranormal Romance (The Sephlem Trials Book 1) Page 25
