CHAPTER II.
_A surprizing instance of Mr Adams's short memory, with the unfortunateconsequences which it brought on Joseph._
Mr Adams and Joseph were now ready to depart different ways, when anaccident determined the former to return with his friend, whichTow-wouse, Barnabas, and the bookseller had not been able to do. Thisaccident was, that those sermons, which the parson was travelling toLondon to publish, were, O my good reader! left behind; what he hadmistaken for them in the saddlebags being no other than three shirts, apair of shoes, and some other necessaries, which Mrs Adams, who thoughther husband would want shirts more than sermons on his journey, hadcarefully provided him.
This discovery was now luckily owing to the presence of Joseph at theopening the saddlebags; who, having heard his friend say he carried withhim nine volumes of sermons, and not being of that sect of philosopherswho can reduce all the matter of the world into a nutshell, seeing therewas no room for them in the bags, where the parson had said they weredeposited, had the curiosity to cry out, "Bless me, sir, where are yoursermons?" The parson answered, "There, there, child; there they are,under my shirts." Now it happened that he had taken forth his lastshirt, and the vehicle remained visibly empty. "Sure, sir," saysJoseph, "there is nothing in the bags." Upon which Adams, starting, andtestifying some surprize, cried, "Hey! fie, fie upon it! they are nothere sure enough. Ay, they are certainly left behind."
Joseph was greatly concerned at the uneasiness which he apprehended hisfriend must feel from this disappointment; he begged him to pursue hisjourney, and promised he would himself return with the books to him withthe utmost expedition. "No, thank you, child," answered Adams; "it shallnot be so. What would it avail me, to tarry in the great city, unless Ihad my discourses with me, which are _ut ita dicam_, the sole cause, the_aitia monotate_ of my peregrination? No, child, as this accident hathhappened, I am resolved to return back to my cure, together with you;which indeed my inclination sufficiently leads me to. Thisdisappointment may perhaps be intended for my good." He concluded with averse out of Theocritus, which signifies no more than that sometimes itrains, and sometimes the sun shines.
Joseph bowed with obedience and thankfulness for the inclination whichthe parson expressed of returning with him; and now the bill was calledfor, which, on examination, amounted within a shilling to the sum MrAdams had in his pocket. Perhaps the reader may wonder how he was ableto produce a sufficient sum for so many days: that he may not besurprized, therefore, it cannot be unnecessary to acquaint him that hehad borrowed a guinea of a servant belonging to the coach and six, whohad been formerly one of his parishioners, and whose master, the ownerof the coach, then lived within three miles of him; for so good was thecredit of Mr Adams, that even Mr Peter, the Lady Booby's steward, wouldhave lent him a guinea with very little security.
Mr Adams discharged the bill, and they were both setting out, havingagreed to ride and tie; a method of travelling much used by persons whohave but one horse between them, and is thus performed. The twotravellers set out together, one on horseback, the other on foot: now,as it generally happens that he on horseback outgoes him on foot, thecustom is, that, when he arrives at the distance agreed on, he is todismount, tie the horse to some gate, tree, post, or other thing, andthen proceed on foot; when the other comes up to the horse he untieshim, mounts, and gallops on, till, having passed by hisfellow-traveller, he likewise arrives at the place of tying. And this isthat method of travelling so much in use among our prudent ancestors,who knew that horses had mouths as well as legs, and that they could notuse the latter without being at the expense of suffering the beaststhemselves to use the former. This was the method in use in those dayswhen, instead of a coach and six, a member of parliament's lady used tomount a pillion behind her husband; and a grave serjeant at lawcondescended to amble to Westminster on an easy pad, with his clerkkicking his heels behind him.
Adams was now gone some minutes, having insisted on Joseph's beginningthe journey on horseback, and Joseph had his foot in the stirrup, whenthe hostler presented him a bill for the horse's board during hisresidence at the inn. Joseph said Mr Adams had paid all; but thismatter, being referred to Mr Tow-wouse, was by him decided in favour ofthe hostler, and indeed with truth and justice; for this was a freshinstance of that shortness of memory which did not arise from want ofparts, but that continual hurry in which parson Adams wasalways involved.
Joseph was now reduced to a dilemma which extremely puzzled him. The sumdue for horse-meat was twelve shillings (for Adams, who had borrowed thebeast of his clerk, had ordered him to be fed as well as they couldfeed him), and the cash in his pocket amounted to sixpence (for Adamshad divided the last shilling with him). Now, though there have beensome ingenious persons who have contrived to pay twelve shillings withsixpence, Joseph was not one of them. He had never contracted a debt inhis life, and was consequently the less ready at an expedient toextricate himself. Tow-wouse was willing to give him credit till nexttime, to which Mrs Tow-wouse would probably have consented (for such wasJoseph's beauty, that it had made some impression even on that piece offlint which that good woman wore in her bosom by way of heart). Josephwould have found, therefore, very likely the passage free, had he not,when he honestly discovered the nakedness of his pockets, pulled outthat little piece of gold which we have mentioned before. This causedMrs Tow-wouse's eyes to water; she told Joseph she did not conceive aman could want money whilst he had gold in his pocket. Joseph answeredhe had such a value for that little piece of gold, that he would notpart with it for a hundred times the riches which the greatest esquirein the county was worth. "A pretty way, indeed," said Mrs Tow-wouse, "torun in debt, and then refuse to part with your money, because you have avalue for it! I never knew any piece of gold of more value than as manyshillings as it would change for."--"Not to preserve my life fromstarving, nor to redeem it from a robber, would I part with this dearpiece!" answered Joseph. "What," says Mrs Tow-wouse, "I suppose it wasgiven you by some vile trollop, some miss or other; if it had been thepresent of a virtuous woman, you would not have had such a value for it.My husband is a fool if he parts with the horse without being paid forhim."--"No, no, I can't part with the horse, indeed, till I have themoney," cried Tow-wouse. A resolution highly commended by a lawyer thenin the yard, who declared Mr Tow-wouse might justify the detainer.
As we cannot therefore at present get Mr Joseph out of the inn, we shallleave him in it, and carry our reader on after parson Adams, who, hismind being perfectly at ease, fell into a contemplation on a passage inAeschylus, which entertained him for three miles together, withoutsuffering him once to reflect on his fellow-traveller.
At length, having spun out his thread, and being now at the summit of ahill, he cast his eyes backwards, and wondered that he could not see anysign of Joseph. As he left him ready to mount the horse, he could notapprehend any mischief had happened, neither could he suspect that hemissed his way, it being so broad and plain; the only reason whichpresented itself to him was, that he had met with an acquaintance whohad prevailed with him to delay some time in discourse.
He therefore resolved to proceed slowly forwards, not doubting but thathe should be shortly overtaken; and soon came to a large water, which,filling the whole road, he saw no method of passing unless by wadingthrough, which he accordingly did up to his middle; but was no soonergot to the other side than he perceived, if he had looked over thehedge, he would have found a footpath capable of conducting him withoutwetting his shoes.
His surprize at Joseph's not coming up grew now very troublesome: hebegan to fear he knew not what; and as he determined to move no farther,and, if he did not shortly overtake him, to return back, he wished tofind a house of public entertainment where he might dry his clothes andrefresh himself with a pint; but, seeing no such (for no other reasonthan because he did not cast his eyes a hundred yards forwards), he sathimself down on a stile, and pulled out his Aeschylus.
A fellow passing presently by, Adams asked him if he could direct him
to an alehouse. The fellow, who had just left it, and perceived thehouse and sign to be within sight, thinking he had jeered him, and beingof a morose temper, bade him follow his nose and be d---n'd. Adams toldhim he was a saucy jackanapes; upon which the fellow turned aboutangrily; but, perceiving Adams clench his fist, he thought proper to goon without taking any farther notice.
A horseman, following immediately after, and being asked the samequestion, answered, "Friend, there is one within a stone's throw; Ibelieve you may see it before you." Adams, lifting up his eyes, cried,"I protest, and so there is;" and, thanking his informer, proceededdirectly to it.
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