by Davis Bunn
Marvin finally broke his silence when they stopped at a no-name roadside burger joint. “Why aren’t we looking in town?”
Daniel stared at the order window, wondering whether his stomach would keep anything down. “Travis wouldn’t want to be found. His ideal bar would be in a cave.”
Nicole, on the other hand, was as animated as he’d ever seen her. “Marvin’s right. What if he wants to be found?”
Daniel stared at her. “I’m still getting used to the fact that you’re a lot older than your years.”
“Welcome to my world,” Marvin said.
The three shared a smile. The first. Daniel asked, “Anybody hungry?”
“I’m too nervous,” Nicole said.
“I don’t remember seeing greasy burger with fries on my diet list,” Marvin replied.
As Daniel pulled from the lot, his phone rang. He fished it from his pocket, saw it was an unlisted number, and handed it to Nicole. “Mind handling this?”
She answered, listened, spoke a few words, listened some more, then lowered the phone and said, “He claims he’s Connor Larkin.”
Marvin leaned forward. “The movie star?”
Daniel said, “He’s married to a local lady. She runs a restaurant in town. Castaways.”
“Cool.” Nicole lifted the phone, spoke again, then cut the connection. “Connor says to tell you that Travis showed up at their place about an hour ago. He needs a friend.”
CHAPTER 20
When they arrived, the lunch hour was over, and Castaways was empty except for the dark-skinned giant seated at the bar. A half-full coffee mug was the only thing on the polished wooden surface. Afternoon light spilled through the floor-to-ceiling bay windows that formed the restaurant’s western wall. The bar curved like a polished wooden wave around a central station that held a wall of glittering bottles. Every now and then, Travis lifted his gaze from the mug’s black depths and stared at the liquid temptation on display. He frowned as he did so. As if the sole decision he needed to make was precisely where he was going to start his descent.
Daniel settled onto the stool to Travis’s right. He had not called Ricki, nor did he intend to until Travis made up his mind. Daniel also had not spoken. He waited patiently for Travis to start talking. If necessary, he would remain there all day. He had said as much to Nicole before entering the restaurant, explaining how he needed Travis to be the one to step voluntarily from the cliff’s edge. Otherwise, his friend would simply find another lonely place from which to jump.
Through the mirror behind the bottles, Daniel watched Nicole and Marvin follow Connor Larkin from the kitchen. All three of them carried plates and glasses. The movie star was dressed in a USC School of Cinematic Arts sweatshirt with the sleeves cut off, ragged denim shorts, and sandals. If Connor had anywhere more important to be, he did not show it. He directed them to a table by the receptionist’s station. He spoke words too softly for Daniel to hear. Nicole laughed for the first time Daniel had heard since her arrival in Miramar.
Travis shifted on the stool. “All the times I’ve said the words to other fools, you’d think the message would have sunk into this thick skull of mine.”
Daniel nodded to his reflection, glad the man had finally spoken. He said, “You can’t control anyone else’s actions. You can’t take the blame. And you can’t use it as an excuse for falling down.”
“Glad to know you’ve been listening.”
“All the time.”
“I just wish I knew what to do.” Travis’s hands were large enough to completely swallow the mug. “All this while, I thought I’d done a good job bringing that young lady into a happy place.”
Daniel said it because somebody needed to. “Between brothers, I need to tell you, Chloe is already gone.”
Travis appeared to stop breathing.
“Your time of protecting her is over. The fact that she’s underage and not ready doesn’t matter. This is the world we live in. She is not going to wait, much as she should. If you tighten your grip, she’ll find whatever exit is closest.”
Travis lifted his mug, sipped, grimaced at the cold black brew. “This is going to shatter Ricki.”
“Not necessarily.” Daniel sketched out the idea that he’d been formulating since receiving Ricki’s call. Throughout their countywide drive, Daniel had been putting together his pitch, trying to frame this in a way that would make the idea seem acceptable to Chloe’s parents. But as he spoke to the immobile man seated beside him, all Daniel heard were the holes. The flaws. The multitude of ways the whole thing could go awry.
Travis neither spoke nor moved when he finished. Daniel waited with him, giving the friend and father a chance to digest.
Finally, Travis said, “You talked this over with anybody?”
“Of course not.”
“This could work.”
“I’m glad you think so.”
“You want to go ask the people in question if they’d help my little girl?”
“Of course.” Daniel pulled the phone from his pocket. “As soon as you call your wife.”
CHAPTER 21
Daniel followed Travis’s Escalade from Miramar’s main street to Chloe’s school. He did not need to ask Nicole or Marvin how it was going. His niece spent the entire journey turned in her seat, her chin settled on the seat back, watching Marvin. The LA attorney was in his element now, speaking to his erstwhile daughter with the same quiet force he used to convince juries. “I hate to say this. But I understand why you did what you did.”
“I didn’t want to hurt anybody.”
“I know.”
“Especially you.”
Marvin reached out and touched her arm. “I know.”
“But I needed . . .”
“You needed clarity. You needed to set your own course.” Marvin withdrew his hand. “And I should have seen this a long time before now.”
“Mom is so . . .”
If Marvin had any difficulty with Nicole’s unfinished sentences, he did not show it. “Lisa is a wonderful person. And I love her very much.”
“Still now?”
“Yes, honey. I won’t lie to you. This has hurt. A lot. And it’s going to take time for us to recover.”
“I’m so sorry.”
Marvin started to respond. Daniel watched the man absorb Nicole’s distress like stones tossed into a lake, with all the conflicting ripples. A sigh, a slight shake of his head, then Marvin said, “I’ve known since before we were married that Lisa has her own way of seeing life. And sometimes the perspective she wants to claim is real is, well . . .”
“A lie.”
“I prefer the word ‘myth.’ We all do it at some level. Pretend something is real because it suits us. But Lisa takes this to a totally new level. It is her survival mechanism—at least, that’s how I’ve chosen to see it. But it’s just so . . .”
Daniel stopped at the light with the school up ahead. Ricki was standing in the forecourt, her arms wrapped tight around her middle. He heard Nicole say, “Tell me. Please.”
“You know about her and Daniel’s past?”
“A little. Only because Daniel told me.”
“Darling, her early years remain an open wound. I know that much. I don’t know how Daniel survived intact—”
“I didn’t,” Daniel said, speaking for the first time since they left the restaurant. “So please don’t hold me up as some paragon of right living. Because I’m not. And I never have been.”
That drew them both around. The tears Nicole had been almost ready to shed were blinked away. She said, “I think you’re great.”
“I second that,” Marvin said.
“Thanks, but . . .” Daniel decided there was nothing to be gained by telling them how wrong they were. He pulled into the parking space next to Travis and watched as the big man rose from the SUV, walked over, and embraced his wife. Then he asked Nicole, “Will you be okay here without me?”
“Definitely.” Nicole touched him with the s
ame tentative gesture Marvin had used. “Thanks.”
* * *
Daniel got out of his pickup and walked over to where Travis held his wife. Ricki had always struck him as a champion, a woman who had risen from hardscrabble beginnings and triumphed, both on the field and off. She had become the first African American female to serve as a spokesperson for Nike. She had remained a rock through her husband’s descent into the cave of addiction to painkillers and booze, and had been there to welcome him back to clarity and clean living. She had a deep laugh and the strongest embrace Daniel had ever experienced. And yet she stood there in her husband’s arms, trembling like a leaf, so fragile it was only his strength that kept her upright.
Travis said, “Let’s go home.”
“I don’t even know why I came here.” Her tear-streaked face shone ruddy in the afternoon light. “The school already called me to ask why Chloe hadn’t shown up.”
“We’ve got good friends who are going to help us now.” Travis slowly steered her around, giving her a chance to object, to struggle, to remain planted in futile desperation in front of the school. “Let’s go get you settled.”
“I’ve been standing here, trying to remember the last time I heard my baby girl laugh.” Ricki allowed her husband to start toward the Escalade.
“Maybe she’ll be there waiting for us at home,” Travis said. “You can ask her that very thing.”
“I wish I knew what to do.”
“You’re doing it, sweetheart. You’re letting people be there with you and for you.” Travis shot Daniel a look over his wife’s head. “It’s something I needed to remember myself.”
Daniel watched them pull from the space, returned his friend’s wave, then went back to studying the terrain. He figured he’d stand there until the recess bell, watch all the young people come piling out, then ask around. See if anyone could give him a list of places where he should start looking. He glanced back at his car in time to see Nicole open her door. She rose to her feet, sketched him a tiny wave, then opened the rear door and climbed in beside Marvin.
Which was when he spotted the sandwich shop.
Across the street and half a block down, it was a typical sort of student dive. Big windows, tables spilling through the open double doors and crowding the sidewalk. The perfect place to hang out and be seen. Daniel walked over and checked inside. But with school still in session, all save one of the tables were empty.
He started back toward the school’s entrance when a soft voice called from behind him, “Are they gone?”
CHAPTER 22
Daniel did not take nearly as much time outlining his idea to Chloe as he otherwise would have liked. He felt pressured by leaving Nicole in the pickup with Marvin. It had seemed like everything was okay, but he had promised to be there every step of the journey. Even with her saying it was fine for him to come over here, despite the fact that he could see them, his absence felt like a slightly fractured vow. So he sketched out what he had in mind far too swiftly, watching Chloe’s eyes go round in the process. Then he asked, “What do you think?”
“What difference does it make what I think?” She gave him a petulant response, the angry teen venting at the only person within reach. “My parental types will never go for this.”
He did not raise his voice. He showed no anger because he didn’t feel any. “Chloe, I love you like you were family. But I swear you can be your own worst enemy.”
“What, you don’t think I’m right—”
“Of course you are. At least from your perspective. But that is a sixteen-year-old’s attitude.”
Chloe wrapped her arms around her middle. An exact replica of her mother. “What do you want me to say?”
“For this to work, you need to grow up, focus, and answer the question.”
Her grip tightened. “I want it so much it hurts.”
“That’s my girl.” Daniel put his arm around her shoulder, pretending the girl’s tension did not reverberate in his own gut. “Let’s go see if we can make it happen.”
CHAPTER 23
Daniel called to say he was running half an hour late. Which was a good thing, because Stella had yet to decide what she was going to wear.
She had left work early in order to prepare her daughter’s dinner. She had ended up telling the Miramar town hall office staff the truth. That she was going out on a date. Which had drawn the mayor from her quarters, so that she could announce to everyone that Stella had a beau. A famous one at that. Who, she could report as a firsthand witness, was a great kisser.
Stella picked up Amber from the neighbor who operated a happy afternoon way station for several young children of working single parents. She drove home, made Amber’s meal, went upstairs, and stood staring at her closet for fifteen minutes before admitting defeat. She had no idea what she was doing. Or why she had agreed to go on this date in the first place. It was impossible to tell herself this was merely part of the act, or that it all came down to Daniel helping her with this problem issue. Because the truth was, she could still feel his lips.
Stronger still was how she stood there looking at all the clothes she had not worn in ages, and what she saw most clearly was the look in his eyes.
He had drawn back slowly from the kiss and looked at her. Really looked. The way lovers did. A smile had tightened the edges of his eyes. The grin had not needed to reach his lips. The spark in his gaze was enough. She had seen a sorrow as old as time itself. And a wisdom. Or so it felt to her then, standing immobile in the middle of her closet, seeing not clothes but what the moment represented.
She might have stood there for hours. Except Amber skipped her way into the bedroom and announced, “Daniel’s going to be even later than he thought.”
That drew her around. “Why am I hearing this from you?”
“Nicole texted me.” Amber did a sort of pirouette and fell on the bed, still holding out her phone. “He’s really sorry. But he’s doing something for Chloe. She ran away.”
Stella stepped out of the closet. “Why is Daniel giving you a running commentary on the daughter of a friend?”
“He’s not. Nicole is.”
“Same question.”
“She’s great, Mommy. I like her.”
“That’s no answer.” She stepped over. “Give me your phone.”
Stella expected an argument. Amber was as private as any preteen when it came to what she discussed with her friends. But this time she simply rose to her knees, handed over the device, and said, “They found Chloe. Daniel’s still working on an idea he had to make things better.”
Which was exactly what she read, as she scrolled through a dozen back-and-forth texts spanning the past few hours. “I’m not sure how I feel about you two being in such close contact.”
“Why, Mommy?” Amber began bouncing on the bed. “She’s really, really nice.”
Stella had a hundred reasons, but none of them actually sounded good enough to express. Because the truth was, it had very little to do with Nicole and everything to do with Daniel. Stella declared, “I’m going for a run. Did you finish your dinner?”
“I don’t like spinach.”
“Amber . . .”
“Okay, Mommy.”
She dressed in shorts and jogging top and running shoes, bound her hair back as tightly as she wished she could control her thoughts and emotions, and left the house.
Stella had run her way through any number of hard-edged late afternoons. The regular pattern of steps, the steady breathing, the trail, the sunlight, the passing joggers—all helped immensely in making sense of whatever problem she carried. Just like now. By the time she turned around and started back, she had reached the only conclusion that made sense.
She was going to end things the moment he showed up.
She would just have to weather this emotional tempest by herself. There was a chance, a real one, that Daniel would arrive, and he would have had a bad day, and he would introduce another horrid crisis into their lives. S
he heard his honest description of who he once had been for what it really was—a warning of things to come.
By the time she left the trail and started down her road, she had convinced herself that she was better off alone.
Which was when she arrived at the end of her driveway. And found Daniel seated on the front step. Laughing at something Amber was saying, the two of them as easy and intimate as lifelong friends.
She had been determined before. Now she was terrified.
CHAPTER 24
When Stella came jogging around the curve in their road, Amber was saying, “I’m trying to decide if Goldie would look good in a sailor’s suit. You know, like they show on the videos. With the little hat and everything.”
But one look into Stella’s eyes and Daniel felt the happy moment drain away. Not even Amber’s lilting charm could erase his certainty over what was coming next. He rose to his feet. Stella’s unspoken message needed to be heard standing up.
Tension tilted Stella’s body slightly to the left. Her arms were clasped along her middle and twisted so the thumbs pointed back at her thigh. “Can I speak with you a moment?”
Amber announced happily, “We were talking about Goldie. Can I have a puppy?”
“Go inside, please.” Stella stood there, tight as a drawn bow, staring at some vacant point beyond Daniel’s shoulder. As soon as the door clicked shut, she said, “This isn’t going to work.”
Daniel did not pretend to misunderstand. He stood there, and he took it in silence.
“I should never have agreed to go out with you. It’s just . . .” She released her grip and wiped her face with an unsteady hand. “Now isn’t a good time.”
Daniel had a hundred things he wanted to say. How this was the first date he’d actually been looking forward to in four years. How her daughter had already captured his heart. But Stella continued her thousand-yard stare, her body charged with all the arguments she was just waiting to fire in his direction. So he simply said, “I’ll be going, then.”
He walked back to his pickup and started the engine and pulled from the drive, all without looking directly at the woman who still stood there on her walk, staring at the empty space by her front drive.
