She looked back at him. She couldn’t tell what was going on in his mind at that moment. Should I be worried? After his big revelation, things had become uncertain for her.
“I really hope things will go back to normal between us.” Will cleared his throat. “I miss you.”
Una could feel so much pain in that one sentence alone.
“I know you want me to let you go. But I just can’t, Una. I need you.”
Suddenly, she felt a terrible weight on her shoulders. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
Will quietly place the tray on the floor and took a step closer to the bed. “Please, Una, let’s start over. There’s nothing I could do about my past. Yes, I’ve done terrible things. I know I have caused great pain to a lot of people. To you. But I want to change. You make me want to change. Please.” Tears burned his eyes as he pleaded.
Una opened her eyes. Given her bleak situation, she should have been crying too, but she was done with crying. She had already cleared her mind, and it was time for her to make choices.
Will sobbed. He wasn’t finished. He would beg her every day if that was what it would take to get her back. “I know you see nothing in me but a murderous monster. But I am willing to change.”
Una stared at him with emotions flooding her at once. Her mind then drifted back to the times when things were still normal between them. He had made her feel important and pulled her out from the dreadful world she lived in for a long time. Maybe he really did love her. He even killed Sinclair for her.
And Liezel. Her best friend. Watching her choke on her own blood was the most painful thing Una had ever witnessed. Her jaw clenched, grinding her teeth and her eyes glossed over gently as the memory shook her to her core. If given a chance, she would have killed Sinclair herself for what he did.
“Give me a chance to become a good person. Please…” Will’s voice cut through her raging thought.
Una knew she couldn’t push Will away forever. She had to do something, and she could either push back until he’s finally fed up of her rejection and decided to kill her or she could submit to his plea, forgive him, and hope hard enough that he’s true to his promise and never kill again. But with people like Will, she knew there was really no way of knowing the truth.
Her heart started to beat loudly as he moved towards the bed and sat dangerously close to her. She paused and swallowed before putting her soft hands against his damp cheeks, said nothing, and then let go.
“I know I can change.”
She could see the intensity in his eyes, some kind of desire or need, a craving completely similar to the one he had shown when they first shared a night in his garden―but right now, he was clearly trying to fight it.
With each passing second, tension grew thicker in the room as they stared into each other’s eyes. An unexpected glint glistened in Will’s eyes, dark desires hidden just beneath the surface. Una watched him nervously and carefully. Sensing her distress, he reached up and pressed his hand against her cheeks gently.
“You have no idea how badly I want you right now,” Will whispered, tilting her head up slightly. He had already doubted his self-control around her even before―or if he even had one.
Una felt her heart leaped up to her throat at the feel of his warm breath in her ear, a shudder past through her. She remained silent, her mouth slightly open, unsure of the sudden rush of heat flushing all over her body. She had figured that the way he was staring at her was aimed more than just to comfort her, he was teasing her. And she was remarkably taken by it, no matter how many times she blinked to snap her out of his hold on her. It was a moment like this when Will was able to display his dominance, just like the first time they kissed and the first time he took her.
Gradually, he leaned closer to her, their lips merely an inch away from each other. “…such things I have been longing to do to you…” he whispered, grazing his lips against hers, fully aware of her elevated breathing.
Una looked up at Will when he started to unbutton her pajama top deliberately slow and stroke the back of his knuckles along her exposed collarbone. She lightly shivered. Her body was always this attentive and responsive under his touch. At the back of her mind, she knew what Will was going to do next. And she had always enjoyed Will’s kisses, but right now, she was still dubious whether she could go through with it.
But Will had something else in mind, his thoughts were focused elsewhere. He pulled her up and had her sat down on the edge while he stood in front of her. He smiled at her before he slowly pushed her down, his hand supporting her back until she fell back against the mattress. When her toes curled against the cold floor, he lifted her hips clear off to the edge as if he was reading her mind.
Una gasped as soon as she felt him tugging her pajama bottom down her legs. And before she could let out a sound of protest, Will knelt down and softly kissed her belly button, hands caressing her thighs. She tensed up and closed her eyes. Suddenly, she felt his tongue on her inner thigh. Her eyes tore open and she propped up on her elbows and stared at him.
She knew she was slipping and soon she would lose herself to the haze of desire and pleasure―just like before.
Will pulled back just enough so he could look up at her. He smiled at her again before lowering his mouth to her calf, trailing kisses up to her inner thigh, and slowly…gently moving up. A shiver ran up the length of her leg. And then he stopped and grinned at her, pulling away.
Una gasped and opened her mouth to say something to him but abruptly stopped when he quickly crawled on top of her and propped himself up on one elbow. He looked into her for a moment, his other hand stroking her thigh. Leaning over, he gently brushed his lips against hers.
He teased her then finally kissed her deeply when she complied and parted her lips. He moaned as his tongue relished the familiar taste of her mouth. She was finally his again.
“I missed doing this…” Will whispered into her mouth, his hand now tracing the waistband of her underwear.
He hurriedly pulled his shirt off and ripped open her blouse. His eyes roaming over her body. “I’ve become desperate for you.”
The kiss turned more intense when he slid his tongue in her mouth, exploring it once again. He slightly pulled back again. “Dammit…if we don’t stop now…” and again went for her mouth, this time he didn’t hesitate to take her tongue and gently suck on it.
When Una suddenly lifted her hands and ran her fingers through his dark hair, he deepened the kiss but only to pull away a second later.
“I want you so bad. I want to hear you moan for me again…but only if you want to.” His voice came in a low rasp. Then his features softened. The burning desire in his eyes was quickly replaced with melancholy.
He wrapped her arms around her and pulled her body closer against him as he lowered her on the bed. “It’s taking all of my control not to take you right now, Una,” he added softly directly into her ear. “I want to taste every inch of you again as I had done before…but not like this.”
Una pursed her lips and her hands clenched the hem of her pajama top.
“Do you want me? Do you want this?” Will nipped at her shoulder and her breath hitched.
But Una didn’t move underneath him and didn’t even respond. He looked at her to meet her eyes yet she looked anywhere but at him.
“I love you, Una,” he whispered before he gently rolled onto his back. A few seconds later, he finally climbed out of bed.
Una shut her eyes closed and listened to his footsteps and the door opening. A single tear rolled down from her eyes as soon as she heard the door closed, followed by a clicking sound of the knob locking.
She sucked in a breath and wiped her cheek with the back of her hand. No more crying.
***
Glen knew he wasn’t supposed to be in the Boston Police Station but at his desk, working. But it’s been weeks and no one had come up with a solid lead, the chief officer wouldn’t even call Una’s disappearance a case. They had in
sisted that it was most likely a “domestic” issue. But how could it be a domestic issue? No one even had a decent answer.
“Do you have any update? Any news?” he asked right away,
“The entire Boston Police Department is still looking for a lead,” Frederick answered.
“So, you’re telling me that until now, you still don’t have any idea where my friends could be?” he asked, clenching his fist and breathing heavily. His temper quickly dropped as soon as he noticed the dark circles around the officer’s eyes had become more pronounced than the last time they spoke.
“We are doing everything we can, Mr. Russo.” Frederick sighed. “Look, we file reports about missing people every day. Ms. Miller is an adult and a college student to be more specific,” the officer behind the desk said.
“And is that supposed to mean anything?”
“A year ago, a college student went missing for a month. He was last seen beaten up by his roomie. His roommate became the prime suspect and was detained. Two months later, that missing college student suddenly re-appeared. Turned out, he stole his roommate’s money and got beaten up because of that. And just last month, a girl who was reported missing for six months came back. Turned out, she ran away with her Mexican boyfriend that her parents find repulsive,” the officer said, looking bored like he had recited the same explanation over and over again.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, Officer.” Glen’s voice tightened. “A missing adult, unless there is a valid proof of foul play, will not get the same amount of attention and importance. Is that right?”
“All I’m saying is that some people choose to go missing. Suspicious circumstances are necessary to secure a thorough investigation, but I am not saying that―”
“Look, detective, the mere fact that all four of them have gone missing must tell you that there is foul play.”
The officer sighed. “Yes, Mr. Russo, and we are looking into it now. My team is checking all angles and we’re looking into each of the missing individual’s background and any history that could help us.”
“And what have you got so far?” Glen asked with a calm voice this time.
“As of now, we know that Ms. Miller’s been seeing a doctor for quite some time. And just last year, her previous housemate, Ms. Tyra Andrews, was reported missing too. Ms. Annika Jacobs, the waitress at Sanson Road Café, where she and Ms. Blanco had frequented, was reported missing as well.”
Glen had finally noticed the frustration Frederick was feeling right now. With all these people being missing, he’d be having long, sleepless nights too.
“Look, Mr. Russo, don’t get me wrong, but I know that this is serious. Mr. Godfrey and Mrs. Maxwell are already hammering on us and if we don’t get anything as soon as possible, the FBI will be walking on our front door to assist us. But we will do everything we can first before that happens.”
He knew that the local police wouldn’t want that and as much as possible, they would want to solve the case on their own. “Will you please tell me as soon as you get something?”
“I will, Mr. Ru―”
Glen adjusted his black-rimmed glasses. “Call me, Glen.”
“Sure, Glen, I will.”
***
Jeffrey Sullivan was a crack dealer who was also a screwed-up addict. The guy was pretty much still gorked when Will shared with him his own kind of addiction. He thought Will was referring to the kind of drugs he had allowed to slowly ruin his relationship with his family and his life. Even when Will was leisurely pulling out his teeth, he still couldn’t figure out that Will’s addiction was way different than his.
And before Will could cut off all of his skin with his favorite paring knife, Jeffrey told him that he’d end up just like him. He was wrong. People said to never get high on your own supply and Will had thought of it a lot of times. Perhaps Jeffrey Sullivan didn’t really care.
Looking at Una Miller, staring straight at her brown eyes, Will felt like he was already high. There’s something about her that kept him coming back for more.
“What do you think of my hair?” His new coal-black hair didn’t really bother him. But he had to be extra careful now that he had been exposed. He was pretty sure that their bodies had been discovered by now and that the authorities could be on his tail by now―or William Thomas’.
Una nodded silently. “Were you nervous when you made your first kill?”
That was precisely one of the many things Will had come to like about her. She didn’t really seem to care to filter anything. He knew he could always count on her to be honest, even if it had to be brutally awkward.
He cleared his throat before answering. His soup had too much garlic. “No. I was drowning with excitement. I could still remember my hand trembling like crazy as I was holding the knife, all set and ready to slit my first victim’s throat. But no, I wasn’t trembling because I was nervous. It was an insanely euphoric moment for me.”
He noticed her shift in her seat. “Are you scared of me, Una?” He obviously knew he was making her uncomfortable.
She shook her head, her eyes staring back at him. “No. I’d seen worse far too long. Nothing scares me anymore.”
And he believed her. Her unflinching voice was just too resilient to ignore. She may be uncomfortable but she wasn’t scared. “I’m glad that you aren’t. And you shouldn’t be. I’ll never fucking hurt you.” That was true, although the little voice in his head disagreed.
“Could you please stop it?”
“Stop what?”
“Stop cursing!” The annoyance in Una’s voice and her eyes told Will she was serious. “I perfectly understand that this is not my house and I do not have any jurisdiction to implement my rules, but I would really appreciate it if you would stop with the cursing already. I can’t stand it anymore!”
Will smiled. He didn’t know why, but he found her candid approach to making a point somehow… appealing. He noticed her frowned at his smile. “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” He promised her. “Your rules are fine. I mean, I’m not even a fan of having house pets.”
“What is it with you serial killers and your hatred for pets?” she asked, casually referring to him as a serial killer like it was nothing serious.
“I don’t and cannot speak for all of the murderers in the world. I think it all depends. Maybe some of them actually have pets. I like birds…sometimes when they’re quiet. You are not a fan of pets, too. You even included it in your house rules…you don’t like dogs.”
They were the same.
Una sighed and looked away.
“My aunt had a dog. His name was Lyon. He died and I kind of had something to do with it,” he said and flashed her a lopsided smile. “In my defense, he wouldn’t shut up. And…killing dogs don’t make me feel good. It doesn’t make me feel anything at all. I don’t like them. But I don’t want their entire population dead.”
He hoped Una would consider it as a valid point. He thought, why let something stay if it would only give you nothing but inconveniences? A few of his victims before either owned a dog or lived near someone who had a dog and they just hated him and they couldn’t shut up about. They had to go.
“Aside from murdering people, what else interests you?”
Easy one. “You.”
She quickly rolled her eyes and sighed again, looking a bit annoyed this time. “What else?”
“I like birds. I like them so much, in fact, I envy them. I sometimes wish I could have wings and go wherever I want. They’re enjoying real freedom. I like it.”
Will could imagine kicking himself for lying to Una right now. Because what he just said were actually Emerald Cooper’s last words right before he stabbed her several times on the chest. Emerald Cooper who spent half her life coveting her sister’s relationships, job, and everything that she lacked.
It was Emerald Cooper who liked birds. It was Emerald Cooper who envied them. It was Emerald Cooper who wished she had wings so she could go anywhere around the world.
Poor Emerald Cooper: her half-sister hated her so much she wanted her dead before her twenty-fourth birthday.
Will thought he should practice being honest more often. Next time.
“I guess psychopaths aren’t all the same after all,” she said, eyeing him.
If it would satisfy her to call him a psychopath, a serial killer, or a monster, so be it. Will wouldn’t give a shit. Those words meant nothing to him anyway.
“No, we aren’t.”
“So, you agree that you are a psychopath.”
Will wasn’t sure where she wanted to take the conversation, but it’s all right, as long as it would please her, again, he wouldn’t give a shit. “Psychopaths, according to some experts, are emotionally poor, lack empathy and do not show remorse at all. I am sorry for my bad history. It’s something I couldn’t change no matter what, Una. But I am not really emotionally inadequate. I have real…feelings.”
Una stared at him as if searching for any depths of what he just said.
“I wish my past was different, Una; somehow better and perhaps more normal. But it is what it is, and I’ve told you already, I want to be good…for you. I am emotionally involved and committed to you. More than you know.”
But he knew her too well already; she wasn’t the kind to just say yes and wrap her arms around him in a loving embrace. No, she wasn’t that kind.
All he got from her was a stare that hinted nothing.
They quietly carried on with their dinner until she decided to break the silence. “Atonement.”
“What?”
“Anyone who violates the rights of others must certainly atone for the damages or harm they did. Killing is a sin. You must atone for your sins.”
“I enjoyed killing those people, yes. And perhaps it was my addiction. Addiction is an illness and not a crime.” Did he ever ask to be what he had become? He certainly did not, but couldn’t complain either. Should he be ashamed that he enjoyed every second he spent with his victims? Will shamelessly thought not.
Considerably Wicked: A Dark Romance Page 29
