I tug my cardigan around me again. It’s second nature. A nervous habit. My sweater is like a barrier of protection. I don’t know why I feel uneasy around Daven, but I feel like I shouldn’t share too much.
Hopefully he won’t comment on the fact that I’m overdressed. Anytime anyone has questioned me about how bundled up I dress in public, I’ve always told them I run cold, but I don’t feel like explaining myself to Daven, nor do I want him to realize what I’m wearing and not wearing under this cardigan.
Plenty of women of my stature go without bras. I’ve just never been one of them. Until three years ago. And I’ve never gotten used to it.
Daven lowers the pictures and glances around my apartment. “Nice place.”
It is. I agree. I didn’t choose it or nearly anything in it, but it’s nice.
“So where’s this boyfriend of yours? I kinda figured you might be living with him.”
God, I wish he would stop bringing up Master Roman. I’m not prepared to answer questions about him. I don’t want to lie, but I can’t fathom how I’m going to respond to this latest line of questioning.
Suddenly, a loud knock sounds at the door, making me jump in my seat. No one ever comes to my apartment. Claudia was here to bring me lunch, but other than that, I’ve had zero guests. I don’t know very many people, and the few people I do know would call or text first.
I jump to my feet, grateful for whoever it is because they’ve kept me from answering the latest line of questioning. It’s probably someone delivering a package to the wrong apartment. Or hell, maybe Master Roman had something sent to me here. That’s also possible.
I don’t even look through the peephole before I open the door. And then I gasp, unable to breathe, eyes wide. Master Roman is standing in the doorway, hands on both sides of the frame, body tense, eyes narrowed, his expression one of displeasure.
I should be freaked out by both his arrival and his expression. Instead, I find myself soaking him in. I haven’t seen him in five days. I’ve missed him terribly. I want to throw myself at him. I want him to wrap me in his arms, take me over his knee, yell at me, talk dirty to me, boss me around. Anything. I just miss him so much.
For a moment, we stand there not moving, staring at each other. I’ve forgotten Daven completely. I flinch when I come back to myself.
Master Roman’s gaze is on mine, and he leans closer, not touching me. His voice is quiet and low when he murmurs. “Who’s the man you brought back to your apartment, Lucy?”
A chill runs down my spine at his tone. He’s never taken that tone with me once in three years. It’s frightening, and I don’t like it. I take a step back, gripping the door.
My movement gives Master Roman a better view into my apartment—the apartment that’s not mine at all but really his. His gaze shifts past me.
A commotion at my back tells me Daven has stood. “Hi,” he says as he approaches from behind me. “Speak of the devil. I was just asking Lucy about you.” He chuckles. And then he’s at my side.
I step back further, completely unnerved by this entire development. I have no idea how I’m going to play this. I’m not at all sure I trust my brother yet. I don’t know him. Not really. He’s kind of strange. And Master Roman? I don’t know him at all right now. He obviously knew Daven was in my apartment but doesn’t know who he is. I’m furious that he’s somehow been watching me. He must have cameras in my living room. I should have suspected that.
What else has he seen me doing? And why didn’t this occur to me before now? He’s obviously watched me putter around in my nighties. Has he watched me sleeping? Does he have a camera in my bedroom like he does at home? Did he see me partially masturbating the other day?
How did he get here so fast? Daven and I have only been here a few minutes. I jerk my attention back to the two men. What I want to do is shove them both out the door so I can be alone. Instead, I release the door, tug my sweater tight, wrap my arms around myself, and step out of the way.
If Master Roman wants to confront me for bringing a man into my apartment, fine. He can go to town.
Daven reaches out a hand. “Nice to meet you. I’m Daven Neill, Lucy’s brother.”
For a moment, Master Roman simply stares at him. Finally, he releases the doorframe, stands to his full height, and takes Daven’s outstretched hand. “Roman Cortell,” he responds unnecessarily.
“Yep. I knew that. Saw pictures of you in the news from Lucy’s graduation.”
Master Roman releases Daven’s hand and narrows his gaze. Good. He’s as skeptical as I am. He finally steps inside, his gaze shifting to me. His face is hard, but his eyes somehow express sorrow. He has stomped over here with lightning speed to confront me about having a man in my apartment. I’m livid.
I shuffle backward as Master Roman steps toward me. Rationally, I realize I need to put on a show for Daven, but I’m struggling to contain my fury.
Suddenly, Master Roman closes the distance and pulls me into his arms. Tighter than ever. He holds me firmly against his chest, his hand on the back of my head. His mouth comes to my ear, and he whispers, “I’m an asshole.”
Just like that, I slump into him. Because I’m weak and I’ve missed him. I’m not going to let this go, but at least I think I can control my anger until Daven leaves. Master Roman has stepped too far, but he’s still the man I’ve been in love with for three years. It’s not the first time he’s gone too far. He did so once a few months after I met him. That was much worse, of course. This is a misunderstanding that we will clear up when I stop seeing red and after I lay into him for not trusting me.
I’ve never given him a reason to be jealous of anyone for even a second, nor have I ever wanted to, but Master Roman has a jealous streak that comes out every once in a while on its own. It’s why he was reluctant for me to attend my college classes physically instead of online. It’s partly why we rarely go out. He doesn’t like to share me with the world. Daven is part of the world.
Finally, Master Roman releases me just enough to cup my face and kiss my forehead. When he turns around, his face is more relaxed. He tucks me possessively into his side. “So, Daven, how did you find Lucy? We looked for you when you first contacted her, but it was like you vanished from the earth.”
Daven’s eyes go wide, and he glances from Master Roman to me and back. I cringe as I realize what Master Roman has revealed. Daven’s lips part. “You’ve been dating more than three years?”
Master Roman’s fingers tighten on my arm. I’m sure he’s mentally kicking himself. I’d like to physically kick him. “Yep. We’d just met when you contacted Lucy.” That part is true.
Daven glances around my apartment again. “Huh. Well, that explains how you were able to afford such a nice place while you were in school.” He winces as soon as those words leave his mouth as if just realizing they were inappropriate and presumptuous and tacky. “Shit. Sorry. That came out wrong.”
Master Roman’s vise grip tightens. I’m not going to be able to breathe if he squeezes me any tighter. “Ya think?” he clips.
I don’t want him to show his anger. I’ve just met Daven today. He may be kinda strange, but he’s my only living relative. I want to give him a chance. I pat Master Roman on the chest and nudge him with my elbow so that he will loosen his grip. “I actually worked while I was in school,” I inform Daven.
It’s true. In fact, I was paid so ridiculously well from my benefactor that my bank account is flush. For three years, no matter how many hours a day I worked, Master Roman has put my originally agreed-upon salary in my bank account every Friday. I’ve rarely spent any of it or even paid attention, but it’s there. I could have afforded this apartment if I’d wanted to.
“Oh.” Daven’s eyes widen. “Of course. Right. I didn’t mean anything by it. I just read the articles about you two dating and…” He waves a hand through the air, stopping himself. “None of my business.”
Master Roman changes the subject. “Where are you staying, Daven
? How long are you in town?”
Daven wipes his palms on his jeans and glances at me. “I was actually going to ask Lucy if I could stay here with her. I don’t have definitive plans. I’m between jobs, so my cash flow is a bit dry.”
Master Roman flinches subtly enough that I’m sure I’m the only one who notices. Nevertheless, his voice is a little off as he responds. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. You just met today. Seems like you should take some time to get to know each other first. Besides, Lucy only has one bedroom, and she’s pretty introverted. She doesn’t like to be around people for very long.”
I could kiss him. After I throttle him, of course. His answer is perfect, but he also shouldn’t be speaking for me. I’m a grown woman. I can make decisions about my brother for myself. Do I want him to stay here in my pseudo-apartment? The one where I would inevitably make a fool out of myself looking for things?
Nope. Not at all. But the fact that Master Roman took the choice out of my hands infuriates me.
“Right. Of course. Duh.” Daven gives a plastic smile and slaps his forehead. “I don’t know what I was thinking. It would be inappropriate for me to stay here.” He shuffles toward the door. I’m beyond excited for this turn of events. “I should get going actually. I’m sure you two had plans, and I’m interrupting. Can I come by tomorrow, Lucy? Continue catching up?”
“Sure.”
“What time is good? Do you have a job?”
I shake my head. “I’m between jobs too. I’m looking for something more permanent now that I’ve got my degree.” This is the truth. It’s also the point of contention between me and Master Roman. The reason I’ve moved into this foreign apartment to consider my options.
Daven nods. “Good. Makes sense. Okay, I’ll come by in the afternoon, yeah?”
“Sounds good.”
“Okay. Great. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He lifts his gaze to Master Roman. “Nice meeting you. I’m so glad my sister has found someone who so clearly adores her.”
At the moment Master Roman is adoring me far too much, and I’m counting the seconds until Daven is gone so that I can extricate myself from Master Roman’s grip and lay into him for his behavior.
Chapter 18
Master Roman
* * *
I know I’ve fucked up, and the moment the door shuts, I turn around to find my normally sweet girl glaring at me, arms crossed in a way I never permit. This is not my little. This is a formidable woman who is pissed. “Lucy, I…”
She holds up a hand. “Don’t. Don’t even try to explain yourself. You barged in here thinking the worst of me, and I’m furious with you.”
I nod. She’s right. I lower my voice. “I wanted to say I’m sorry.”
She cocks out a hip in a manner I’ve seen very few times in three years and shoots daggers at me with her eyes. “What I want to know is if you’ve been following me or if this apartment has cameras. For a moment, I assumed you had cameras in every room, which, by the way, would piss me off far worse than I already am, but then I realized you couldn’t have gotten here as quickly as you did if you were simply monitoring this apartment.”
I blow out a breath. “I’ve had someone keeping an eye on you.” I stand straighter to finish my point. “Not because I don’t trust you but because I’m worried about you, and I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
She lets out a sardonic chuckle I’ve also never heard before and rolls her eyes toward the ceiling. We’re in uncharted territory here. It feels like everything we’ve ever had together has vanished in one heartbeat. “You trust me? That’s rich. If you trusted me, you wouldn’t have driven across town like a bat out of hell to barge in here the moment someone you didn’t know entered the apartment.”
I’m scrambling. I know it. But I have no choice. “I assumed you figured out someone was following you and decided to throw it in my face, taunting me by bringing a stranger back to your apartment. I feared that guy could hurt you while you made your point.”
She rolls her eyes again. In our normal world, I would already have her over my knee. I can’t do that right now, but I’m itching to. I’ve missed her so badly for five long days that I’d do anything to get to touch her, even if it’s for punishment.
I keep talking, even though I’m pretty sure I’m digging a deeper hole by the minute. “I get now that the man was your brother, but honestly, Lucy, I don’t think I liked him. He was shifty. I’m not sure his motives were above board. Who asks someone they’ve just met if they can stay with them?”
She stands taller and drops her arms to her sides, balling her fists. Her cardigan spreads open enough for me to see the university T-shirt she’s wearing underneath. I’d give just about anything to find out what’s underneath it.
“Don’t judge my brother. You don’t know anything about him. You barged in here acting like a possessive boyfriend coming to save the day. He probably thinks you’re a lunatic.”
I take a step closer to her as she backs up, well aware she’s going to bump into the wall and run out of space soon. I force my voice to be calm. “Lucy, I am a possessive boyfriend who came to save the day, and I don’t care who thinks I’m a lunatic as long as you’re safe.” I hold out a hand, hoping she’ll take it.
She glances at my outstretched fingers and then back toward my face.
“Come sit with me,” I encourage. “I just want to talk.”
“I’m not ready to talk, Sir. I don’t have anything to say.”
I feel like a huge hurdle has been jumped just by the addition of the word Sir to her vocabulary. I’m bridging the gap. “Not about us or our future. I want to hear about your half brother.”
She stares at me, uncertainty in her eyes. I know what my best move is. It’s this one. If I can just get her to open up about Daven, at least we’ll be communicating.
Finally, she unballs one of her fists and sets her hand in mine. I know her hands better than I know my own. I’ve held them so many times a day for three years that I know every line on her palms. I know the curve of her nails. I’ve watched her fidget those fingers in her lap hundreds of times. I know the difference between her fists of frustration and her fists of arousal and pure bliss. I’ve seen her white knuckles when I secure her wrists to something while I make her body hum. I love these sweet hands, and it feels huge to me that she’s set one in mine.
I give a slight tug and lure her toward the sofa. When I lower myself into the corner, I pull her toward me, hoping she’ll sit in my lap.
She doesn’t. Instead, she sits next to me, and I try not to let my disappointment show. At least she hasn’t kicked me out of her apartment.
“Tell me about Daven.”
I listen intently, holding her gaze as she goes over everything she’s learned. I don’t interrupt until she finishes with me entering the apartment. When she’s done, I point out the obvious. “So, he disappears for three years to presumably drive an 18-wheeler. He mysteriously quits that job recently, shows up here, and seems to have no money.”
She sighs. “That doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy.”
“True. But it means you need to be careful.”
“I’m a grown woman. I can handle myself,” she insists.
“I’m well aware of your age, Lucy.” I let my voice take on a tone of admonishment, just enough to remind her who I am to her. “And the fact that you have a college degree. That doesn’t make you less vulnerable. You’re small. Someone could grab you in the park, put a hand over your mouth, and drag you away in two seconds flat, and you would be totally defenseless.”
“And that’s why you’ve had someone following me for five days,” she responds. “You do realize this is a very public area, I don’t go out in the middle of the night, and I always have my phone on me. The chances of someone kidnapping me are pretty slim.” Her voice is a bit cocky, and I don’t like it.
“Watch your tone, Lucy. I know you’re spreading your wings and trying to find yourself, but you’re still
my little when we’re alone. Don’t speak to me like a bratty teenager.” I’m hoping if I take this angle, she’ll be soothed. It has worked in the past. She likes boundaries. She likes me to take charge and discipline her. Or she has for the last three years. Could she have changed so much in the past few months that she doesn’t even want to be my little at all anymore?
My heart clenches at the idea. I can feel her slipping away from me. It hurts so badly, and I don’t even know what to say or do to salvage things.
She hesitates and then lowers her gaze. Several moments go by before she speaks again, her voice soft. “Do you have cameras in this apartment, Sir?”
I flinch. She’s worried about cameras? I lift my hand and use two fingers to nudge her chin up so she meets my gaze. I search her eyes, though I’m not sure what I’m looking for. “Have you done anything in your apartment that would disappoint me, blossom?”
She licks her lips. “Answer my question, Sir.”
I shake my head. “No. I would never violate your privacy without your consent.” I have a camera in her little girl bedroom at home, but I told her it was there. It would be an enormous breach of trust if I installed cameras somewhere without telling her.
She nods. “It’s been hard, Sir. I miss your hands on my body. I miss the way you take the edge off.”
I want to know if she’s been masturbating, but I’m not going to ask. I don’t have that right, and besides, it’s unlikely. Lucy has never masturbated. Of course, I’ve also never given her a chance or the need to. I take care of her needs often. Instead of grilling her, I decide to go the other direction. “Would you like me to take you over that edge now, Lucy?”
She sucks in a breath and squirms.
I’m gripping her chin, holding her gaze.
“Let me spank you and bring you to orgasm. You know it will calm you. I’m not asking you to come home with me or make any decisions. Just let me take care of you for a few minutes.”
Leaving Roman Page 13
