by Lucia Ashta
Clyde chuckled, tucking a crimson curl behind his ear. He needed a haircut. The curls were wilder than usual now that they were longer.
“Are you saying that a mouse is one-upping you?” he asked, snorting.
Ah, there was the teenage derision I’d so not missed…
“He’s not a regular mouse, you know. He’s wily, and he shows up when I’m distracted by my thoughts.”
Shawna and Luanne nodded. No one said a peep when I wanted alone time, choosing to take my breakfast and other moments to myself. I’d been doing that since Devin moved out and our divorce was stamped final.
“By the way, Aunt Luanne,” I added, “the mouse reads your romance novels.” I gave her a look, though it was unnecessary. Even Macy and Clyde had caught on to how oversexed my aunts Luanne and Shawna were. They were in their mid-to-upper sixties, but they made no attempt to conceal the fact that their sexual appetites were the size of Texas. I wanted to be like them when I grew up. I often wondered if Jowelle were to get it on as often as they did, if she’d have a one-eighty personality change.
My Aunt Luanne grinned in delight. “Really? He reads my spicy books?”
“It’s how he gets his exercise, running across the pages to read each line.”
“I’ll have to choose my next book with that in mind, then.” Her bright eyes twinkled with her signature mischief, and I knew Humphrey was in for the read of a lifetime. “Shaw, let me know if you have any suggestions.”
Shawna and Luanne had been partners in crime since I was a girl. Aunt Shawna grinned as big as her sister. “I have a few ideas.”
I rolled my eyes. “You two are something else.”
“‘Course we are,” Shawna said, and the longing to be more like them tangibly pulsed through me.
“Don’t go acting like you’re some martyred saint, Ma,” Macy chuffed.
“I’m no saint, I know that, but I do hold back more than I should,” I said, wistful. How much better would life get if I didn’t give a shit to the extent my two wild aunts didn’t? I already didn’t give much of a crap, but they didn’t care what anyone thought of them—at all.
Shawna reached across the table to squeeze my hand. “It’s never too late to let it all hang out, Marla love.”
“That’s right.” Luanne nodded, her hair flying all over the place. “Once you don’t care what anyone thinks of you, you’re free as a bird.”
“A buck naked one.” Shawna beamed at me.
“Life goals.” I chuckled.
“Quade ought to be able to help you let loose.” Luanne gave me a big, theatrical wink, before looking at my kids as if she expected them to be amused by the prospect of their mom getting hot and heavy with her old flame.
Clyde half winced, half smiled, and Macy was suddenly fascinated by the crumbs on her plate.
Nan whisked into the kitchen with her sequined rainbow unicorn purse strapped across her chest. “What’d I miss?”
“Not much,” Shawna said. “Jo’s freaking out about the mouse eating Marla’s food again, and Lu and I were giving Marla some advice on letting loose.”
“She’s too uptight,” Luanne added. “She needs to let some big O’s fly.”
I was once more rapidly becoming desensitized to my aunts. The shock of her words hit me, but only for a moment, and it was mild.
Clyde, however, blushed furiously, while Macy pointed at him and laughed.
Nan wrapped her hands around the back of her usual seat at the kitchen table, where we ate most of our meals. “Well, at least Marla’s got Quade to help with that now.”
“For the last time,” I said, “Quade and I aren’t together. Not yet anyway.”
Luanne rose from the table and sighed. “If that hunk of a man had his sights on me, I wouldn’t be wasting no time.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not like you, Aunt Luanne.”
Luanne gave me a sad smile. “Your loss. But let me tell you, you don’t gain much in life by behaving.”
Shawna gathered her dish and cup and stood. “Behave at your own peril.” She flicked a glance at her elder sister, who appeared consumed, watching the plate wash itself over and over amid bleach fumes. “It’s easy for the days to fly by and become years of obligation when you’re not having fun.”
“On that note,” Nan said, “let’s get the kids to school before the council meeting.”
“What?” Clyde startled. “You’re all going to escort us to our new school?”
“‘Course we are.” Nan flattened the shiny sequins on her unicorn. “You didn’t think we’d let you go to your first day all on your own, did ya?”
Clyde sank in his chair. “No, of course not. Why would we think that?” He shot a look of pure misery to his sister, who looked as appalled at the idea as he was.
But now that we had the full support of family, I wasn’t about to turn it down. By accompanying my kids to school on their first day, the Gawama women were making a clear statement: Macy and Clyde were Gawamas, through and through—no matter who their dad was. Which meant that if you messed with them, you messed with the whole Gawama clan.
Everyone in town would think twice before doing that. And I could only say that because I wasn’t counting Delise.
Delise Contonn had messed with every single one of us.
What she did might have endangered the entire town of Gales Haven.
Chapter Two
I shook my head. “Wow. I can’t believe I actually miss this place.”
“You told us school is awesome here,” Clyde accused.
“Compared to school in the outside world, I’m sure it is. But it’s still school. High school was an awkward time for me.”
“Isn’t it for everyone?” Macy tucked a strand of her long, shiny dark hair behind her ear.
Clyde chuckled uncomfortably while Luanne wrapped an arm around me. “I’m surprised you had time to feel awkward, what with all the humping like rabbits you and Quade were busy doing,” she said.
“Lu,” I hissed. “Quade and I did not hump like rabbits.”
That was a bit of a white lie, but Aunt Jowelle was with us, and that severe disapproving look was firmly in place, furrowing her brow.
“I’m a light sleeper,” Aunt Jowelle said, suggesting she’d heard Quade and me all those times we’d thought we were getting it on right under her nose without her knowing.
I was wondering what the hell I should say, and whether I should just own up to premarital coitus, when I noticed Macy and Clyde—Clyde as pink as a flamingo thanks to his inheriting my pale complexion—looking behind me.
Turning slowly, I came face to face with Harlow, Quade’s teenage daughter. “Oh. Hi, Harlow.” I forced a smile for the nice girl who was similar to Macy with her long, straight dark hair. Her eyes were all Quade though.
“I didn’t notice you standing there. Um.” I tugged absently on a dangling earring. “How long ago did you get here?”
She grinned. “Long enough to hear that you and Dad got down and dirty when you were my age.”
“That makes you … happy?” I asked, catching sight of Nan behind her, enjoying my comedy of errors. Nan was big on the life view of no harm, no foul. Unless the matter seriously threatened the well-being of the town or one of its residents, she took it all in stride.
“So happy,” Harlow said. “He’s been busting my lady balls about staying out too late. Now I can tell him I know all about what he used to do when he was my age. Good luck enforcing a curfew now.”
“Crap,” I mumbled under my breath, scrambling for a way to fix this and coming up empty. “We didn’t start having sex until our senior year, when we were almost eighteen.” And by almost, I meant when we’d recently turned seventeen. “And you’re sixteen, right?”
She flipped her hair and rolled her eyes at me, reminding me so much of Macy it was weird. Maybe it was a snarky teenage girl thing. “Obvi I’m not going to go out and start having sex just because you and my dad did. I won’t have sex until I love
the person and I’m ready. But this gives me all the leverage I need.”
“Leverage is helpful,” Aunt Luanne chimed in, being supremely unhelpful as was her way.
“Sure is.” Harlow beamed and looked at Clyde and Macy. “I’ve been waiting for you guys. I figured you could use a friend for your first day.”
Clyde stepped right up to her. “Definitely.” He shot concerned glances at all us Gawama women. “They’re planning on walking us in.” He said it like he expected her to be as mortified by the idea as he was.
“Makes sense.”
“What? Why?”
“The Gawama family name holds major clout in this town. They’re reminding people that you’re one of them. Kids won’t mess with you overly much if they know they’ve got your back.”
“Oh. Then I guess that’s not so bad. Our last school had major bullies.”
“Yeah, no bullies here. Bessie would turn their butts into stone.”
“You got that right,” Nan said. “I don’t abide by bullying none.”
Harlow smiled. “See?”
“I guess.”
Macy tapped her brother on the arm. “Come on. Let’s get it over with.” Then she headed up the main steps to the school, looking over her shoulder until Clyde and Harlow followed.
“Wait!” I hurried after them. “Hugs.”
Clyde whirled around, furiously shushing me. “Not here, Mom. You’re embarrassing.”
Catching up with them, my nan and aunts on my heels, I took my time glaring openly. “You mean, you perceive what I’m doing as embarrassing. You don’t think I as a person am embarrassing.”
While my youngest was busy not clarifying what he’d meant in the way I wanted him to, a disembodied voice called across the open space.
“Bessie Gawama, you’re needed at the town hall.”
It was Darnell Adams. His magic allowed him to project his voice anywhere.
Nan hitched her unicorn purse higher on her shoulder. “I’ve gotta go. Harlow, you’ll walk them in for us and make sure everyone knows they’re my great-grandchildren?”
“Sure, I’ll walk them in, but everyone already knows of course. Besides, everyone’s been staring at us, so I think your message has already been well received.”
“Yeah,” Clyde chirped. “You don’t need to walk us in. Harlow will show us the way.”
Macy chuckled at him and gave me a quick, discreet squeeze. “Love ya, Ma. See ya later.” Then she rapidly put distance between us, flicking glances at the many students milling around us.
Nan linked her arm with mine. “Come on, Marla girl. They’ll be fine. Harlow’s a good kid.”
The good kid smiled, saluting Nan. “I sure am. See ya!”
In seconds, Harlow and my kids climbed the remaining steps and disappeared behind the double doors of Gales Haven High School. The place looked much as it had when I’d attended the institution. Made of locally harvested wood, the complex consisted of three structures: the high school, the middle and elementary school, which was one large building, and the kindergarten. Since the school was founded along with the town, the structures were a hodgepodge framework. The first manifestation was a one-room schoolhouse as was typical for the start of the nineteenth century. As the residents multiplied, they added on to it, until it became what it is today: a one-stop shop for all things learning.
Even so, there was a limit to what the school taught, magic-wise, and every student would eventually be paired up with a mentor, who would guide the apprentice the rest of the way as their magic awakened.
Nan tugged on my arm. “Let’s go. Darnell wouldn’t be calling unless I was really needed.”
“Right. It’s just that it’s my babies’ first day at magic school. It has my insides all twisted in a knot.”
Aunt Jowelle surged forward, setting the pace toward the parking lot and my car. “So long as you’re not suggesting it’s my food.”
“I’d never insult your food.” And I meant it. I would’ve sworn by the fact. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you and all that—especially not when it feeds you Jowelle-quality fare.
“None of us would,” Aunt Shawna added.
“Ever,” Aunt Luanne echoed, and the fact that Jowelle’s two fun-loving sisters would promise that was saying something.
And though Aunt Jowelle didn’t turn around, her back straightened a bit more. For as stern as she was, that woman sure liked her compliments. Even her crimson hair was woven into a bun as tight as her demeanor.
“Do you think Darnell is calling because Irma’s shown up with Delise?” I asked as Nan and I piled into my Subaru Forester, Jowelle in the back. Luanne rode with Shawna in her car.
“I sure hope so.” Nan clicked her seatbelt on. “I’ve had plenty of time to think of what I want to do to that woman once I get my hands on her.”
Grim curiosity sparked inside me. “What are you planning on doing?”
“I’m going to roast her over a fire pit.”
“Really?” I asked, equally horrified as I was hopeful.
“Yep.”
“Mom,” Aunt Jowelle piped up from the back seat. “Don’t freak her out with that nonsense.”
“My Marla girl doesn’t freak out over what I say. Do you?” Nan asked me.
I laughed. “It depends on what you say.”
“Well, did the thought of me roasting that Delise and her pink poncho over fire ‘freak’ you out?”
“Not really … but that’s just because I can’t stand the woman. And you’re not actually going to do it, so it’s easier to laugh.”
Nan harrumphed.
I felt my eyes widen as I looked from the road up ahead to her. “You’re not going to, are you?”
“She deserves it, endangering the whole town like she did. I should douse her in some of that gasoline we have stashed out back in the shed and light ‘er up.”
“Mom,” Jowelle chided. “Don’t say what you don’t mean.”
“Don’t I mean it though?”
I honestly didn’t know anymore. I’d been gone a while, and the Gawamas had personalities as fiery as they came. No one got on Nan’s bad side on purpose, and definitely not Jowelle’s. Not even Shawna or Luanne’s. For all their fun loving and wild ways, the two younger sisters were fierce when necessary.
When I parked in front of the town hall, like a queen Nan waited for Jowelle to fetch her from the passenger seat. With one of us on either arm, she strode into the assembly hall before Luanne and Shawna caught up.
“There you are!” Stella Egerton exclaimed while she rushed forward, the shiny satin sleeves of her muumuu catching the morning light as it streamed through the large windows. Her hands were a flurry of unnecessary movement. “We received a letter from Tessa.”
“Good. We could use some answers.” Nan continued up the aisle, Stella walking backward as they spoke. “What about Irma and Delise? Or Maguire?”
“No news about them. But we did receive an odd complaint.”
“How odd?”
“Pretty darn.”
I couldn’t fathom what it might be. The residents of Gales Haven embraced the bizarre and strange in the way most people from the outside world avoided.
When Stella just kept rubbing her fingers together, waiting, Nan said, “Well? What is it?” Then she sank into the front pew.
Stella nodded sharply, her jowls wiggling slightly. “Jelly Frumpers says a leprechaun is about to cause real trouble.”
“About to?” Jowelle arched her brow.
“That’s what he says.”
“He’s predicting the future?” Nan asked pensively.
“It’s what he’s saying. He’s also saying Marla Gawama is the one who’s going to solve the case.”
“Case? What case?” Jowelle asked as the doors to the hall swung open and Luanne and Shawna swept in.
As if he’d sensed Shawna’s arrival, Darnell chose that moment to exit a side door and join us.
“And what’s it have to do
with me?” I asked the growing crowd.
“Oh.” Darnell scowled, adjusting his hot pink bow tie as he walked toward us even though, as always, it was impeccable. “I’m sure it’s nonsense.”
“And what makes you say that?” Nan asked.
“What’s going on?” Shawna asked while she and Luanne flanked me.
Darnell waved their concern away. “Jelly Frumpers says a leprechaun is in town and he’s going to start causing all sorts of trouble soon.”
“And that I’m supposed to solve ‘the case,’ whatever the hell that means,” I grumbled.
“It’s not like you to discount the magic of one of our residents,” Nan told Darnell.
“You would have too if you’d seen him when he found me,” he objected, though I’d never known Nan to discount a single thing as unbelievable. “He was drunk as a skunk off Beebee’s brew. He couldn’t even walk straight.”
Stella nodded intently. “But he was making sense.” Her arms wove in the air like she was doing the Macarena dance. “He sounded more lucid than I’ve ever heard him.”
Darnell frowned. “He was slurring his words, Stella.”
“Even so, lucid. I think a leprechaun’s really going to cause problems.”
“You can’t be serious,” I muttered mostly to myself.
“I totally am serious,” she answered, oblivious to my sarcasm.
“Let me guess. If I can hear the animals, then I’ll hear this leprechaun.”
“Everybody will be able to hear the leprechaun,” a tiny voice said from behind me, and I whirled to locate the source of it. I knew what I would find even before I spotted the hedgehog waddling adorably down a side aisle. “Leprechauns won’t shut up. They think everyone wants to hear every bloody word they have to say.”
“Mindy?” I asked by way of greeting.
“Who else would I be?” Then she continued muttering, “Like she knows a ton of brilliant hedgehogs who rock the mom bod like I do.”
I choked on my spit.
“What is it?” Nan asked.
“Mindy,” I wheezed out as I coughed.
