by Nyssa Renay
I sighed. “I’ll try.”
“I meant what I said before. If you ever need anyone to talk to, come and see me. I can help you, but only if you give me the same courtesy the prince is giving you.”
“Which is?”
“Allow me to speak my mind, no matter what.”
“Of course. Why would you need to say that?” I asked, confused.
“Power corrupts even the best of us,” Diabelle explained somberly. “I’ve watched promising shepherds let the power of the guardianship completely change them into self-centered pricks. Look at Talmari—”
“Shepherd Talmari was a guardian?”
“Is a guardian. Remember that!” she said adamantly. “As long as King Lexani is still alive, Talmari will be right beside him giving him advice. He’s one of the most talented Palpit shepherds I’ve ever seen, so try to stay away from him for a while. Got it?”
I nodded. “Shepherd Machoji wasn’t a guardian, too, was he?”
Diabelle stared silently at me for a few moments before speaking again. “Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?” I asked, but she didn’t answer me. She only continued to stare, quietly waiting for me to let the subject go in the same way Shepherd Machoji had always done. “Need to know basis…got it.” I forced a smile.
She placed her hand on my shoulder reassuringly. “Just relax and enjoy the benefits of your new position, okay? You won’t have to worry about this kind of stuff for a while yet. I just wanted to make you aware of how things really are before you go and do something impulsive and stupid…again,” she teased, grinning.
“Thank you, ma’am.” I couldn’t help but let a wide smile break across my face. After all I’d been through at the academy, Shepherd Diabelle had always been there for me, and I hoped she always would be.
“I’m proud of the potential you’ve become, Vigil. I truly am. I know you’ll make one hell of a guardian, too.” Diabelle gave me a quick nod and moved toward the doorway. “I’m guessing I’ll be seeing you tonight in the shepherds’ tower for dinner, won’t I…sir?”
I stood at attention for her one last time. “Yes, ma’am.”
Shepherd Diabelle nodded once more, satisfied. “Dismissed!” she called out as she turned and walked out of the room.
-69-
The change in my status had an immediate effect at the academy, and the shepherds went out of their way to be nice to me every chance they got. I was constantly invited to sit in on any class or demonstration where they could show off their leadership skills in hopes that somehow, they would gain favor with the royal family through me. The only shepherd who even came close to treating me normally was Diabelle, as she always made time to continue my training whenever I could get away from watching over Raxis.
While the shepherds looked for any chance to talk with me, the potentials, on the other hand, kept their distance from me entirely, except Eeliyah. During one of the joint training sessions I’d insisted on attending, I discreetly asked her why my service with the prince frightened everyone so much. She explained that nobody wanted to upset me for fear of upsetting the prince in return, and I began to feel like I was doing more harm than good by training with the other potentials.
My room became my sanctuary. It was the one place where I could truly enjoy the fruits of my labor by studying, reading, and sleeping in true comfort and luxury. Everywhere else outside my room, people either kissed my ass or didn’t speak to me at all. I felt alone. Eventually, out of pure necessity of needing some companionship myself, I not only protected the prince, but I became his friend as well.
As the final months of the year passed by, my responsibilities to the prince seemed to engulf my every waking moment. At the orders of the king and queen, my highest priority was to keep Raxis focused on his studies and make sure he didn’t fall behind. I had less time for myself, my own studies, and my training with Shepherd Diabelle. While I did everything I could do to ensure his success, it was increasingly difficult to keep Raxis, an entitled child of thirteen, from dodging his academy responsibilities. I was the one who constantly took the brunt of the king’s irritation with his own son.
One night, during the last week of the year, the prince decided we should start eating dinner in his quarters to avoid having to listen to the shepherds’ reminders to be ready for his year-end finals. As I took the dinner cart from the Idol servants and wheeled it into the prince’s room, Raxis slammed his book shut and dejectedly walked over to the table to sit down.
“Why didn’t you tell me this stuff was going to be so hard?” he whined, rubbing his temples. “Thank Ein for you, though, Vigil. There’s no way I could get a handle on this stuff without you.”
“I do what I can, Your Highness,” I replied, somewhat frustrated.
I put the hot plate in front of him, taking a rolled-up napkin from the cart. I unraveled the shiny silver fork, spoon, and knife from inside, then placed them beside his plate. “Here you are, Sire. Some wine this evening?” I asked.
He nodded. “Yes, please.”
I took the decanter from the cart and poured the prince a glass of white wine. Then, when I was sure he had everything he needed, I placed my plate, silverware, and wine glass on the table and sat across from him.
“Vigil, I need you to stay late tonight,” he stated, purposefully avoiding my gaze. “I need your help writing my final essay on the history of the Balneal sect.”
“You told me you finished that days ago,” I argued in disbelief, halting the first bite of food inches before my mouth.
“I know,” Raxis said dismissively before taking a long sip of wine. “But I didn’t like how it turned out, so I threw it away.”
“Why would you throw it away? You could’ve just revised it. It’s due tomorrow morning!”
“Why are you getting so mad? We have the whole night to redo it, right?”
“No, you have the whole night to redo it. I’m only supposed to be tutoring you…not doing it for you.”
“But you write so much better than I do,” he whined. “And I thought it might be fun to work on it together after dinner, you know?”
I watched as a disheartened pout spread across his face, as if I’d ruined the well-planned evening he’d devised to have me keep him company. He was an only child, and I knew that situation was hard for anyone. After all, I’d only spent a year on my own after Linna died, but Raxis had spent his entire life alone. I knew how much he enjoyed having an older brother-type figure like me to pal around with and look up to.
“How about this?” I offered. “It’s our first Festival of Ein together, and I know you’re excited about it. But tomorrow night, I need to attend a small gathering with my Necra brothers to say farewell to this year’s graduates. I figured that tonight, we could bust out that final essay and then have our own festival celebration here, just the two of us.”
“That sounds great!” he beamed. “Wait…you’re still spending the festival with me and my parents, right?”
“Of course,” I admitted happily. Getting to see how the royal family celebrated the Festival of Ein, while actually getting to be a part of it was something I’d been looking forward to for the last few months.
“Deal!” he shouted, holding out his hand.
I laughed and shook his hand, knowing how much it meant to him, but suddenly realizing how much it meant to me as well. It had been fourteen years since the last time I’d celebrated something so special with anyone resembling anything close to my family. I felt blessed to be getting a chance to experience that same type of love and joy again, even if I was just an incidental addition to their family.
-70-
The following night as I approached the Necra dorms, Shepherd Diabelle was waiting for me just outside.
“I was wondering if you were going to make it,” Diabelle commented, sounding slightly impatient. “Almost started without you.”
“I know, and I’m sorry I co
uldn’t have gotten here sooner,” I apologized. “Shepherd Talmari put up a stink about me coming here tonight.”
“I’m not surprised,” she scoffed. “He doesn’t like that I’m still training you.”
“I’ve noticed,” I huffed. “He said I should stop wasting my time and just concentrate on helping the prince.”
“Don’t let it get to you.” She forced a smile. “He’s had his head so far up the king’s ass for so long, he can’t see anything past Lexani’s agenda.”
“I really don’t see what the problem is,” I argued. “This is going to be my final year as a potential. It’s just one more year. I mean…it’s not like Raxis is going to be king anytime soon, so why is he being such a prick about it?”
“Because in a few months, the prince turns fourteen. It’s the age when Raxis will finally be recognized as the rightful heir to the throne.”
“I don’t understand. He’s already the heir?”
“Yes, but it’s a matter of being officially recognized by the current king and the people of Telshakra. Right now, he will become king. Once he’s fourteen, he can be the king. It’s a huge difference. His father will have no choice but to let him to speak his mind, especially when it comes to matters of the war or how his people are being treated. If the prince’s opinions start to differ from his father’s, it could make the balance of power difficult to maintain for Lexani, and Talmari knows it.” Diabelle let out a long, heavy sigh. “For now, just do your best to make it look like you’re trying to keep Raxis following in his father’s footsteps. Otherwise, Talmari won’t let you out of his sight. Got it?”
I nodded, ever grateful for her selfless guidance.
“Good,” she grinned, opening the door and motioning for me to head into the building.
As we approached the window to the boys’ dorm, the guard looked out at me. I watched his expression turn to one of panic and disbelief.
“Guardian on deck!” The door guard’s voice cracked slightly as he notified the rest of the Necra boys of our arrival. It was obvious she hadn’t told them I was coming.
As I turned around, I noticed a mischievous smirk spread across her lips. “Fun, isn’t it?” she said under her breath as she led me out onto the scaffold to address the now-scrambling bunch of potentials racing to get to the platform.
“Good evening, gentlemen!” she called out.
“Good evening, ma’am!” the group said in unison, staring forward and shifting nervously on their feet.
“What kind of greeting do you call that? I would hate to think you’re all trying to make me look bad in front of my new boss!” she taunted in her usual boastful, sarcastic way. “Let’s try that again and remember who’s here with us today! Good evening, gentlemen!”
“Good evening, sir!” they replied proudly.
“Now that’s what I’m talking about!” she beamed, flashing me a quick smile.
I couldn’t help but feel reminiscent of the way she used to walk into a room when I was just a potential. It brought back so many happy memories. I truly missed standing alongside my Necra brothers, but I knew those days were forever behind me.
“Perhaps our esteemed guest would like to say a few encouraging words for the two graduates who are about to leave the academy and dedicate their lives to serve Ein to the best of their abilities?” Diabelle hinted, giving me a quick nod.
I felt a wave of nerves flood my body. I’d faced so many traumatic situations in my life, but nothing I’d ever faced could have prepared me for the horrifying shock of being put on the spot like that.
“Gentlemen…” I began, but quickly trailed off, racking my brain for the right thing to say to motivate them at such an important moment. Suddenly, it hit me. “You know what? No,” I said, shaking my head dismissively. “This isn’t about me; it’s about us. Having me stand up here and give you some motivational speech isn’t going to prepare you for what’s out there. You already know. And as I see it, we’re all the same in the eyes of Ein and His Children. It doesn’t matter if you’re a guardian or a shepherd, or still a potential. Each one of us was chosen by Ein for a purpose. We may not always understand why, but I truly believe everything happens for a reason. Who knows? Maybe I survived the attack, just so I could stand here and relay this message to you. Or, maybe I’m still alive because I was blessed to have been trained by one of the best shepherds at the academy, just like the rest of you were. There’s no doubt in my mind that Shepherd Diabelle would ever let any of us leave the academy if she didn’t truly believe we were ready, and for that, I will always be grateful.” I turned and bowed humbly toward Shepherd Diabelle as a loud applause quickly burst from the rows of potentials below.
“All right, all right. Enough of that,” she said, letting a smile spread across her face as she waved her hands to quiet the group. “First of all, let me say thank you, Vigil, for your kind words. You’re right. It’s not about any single person; it’s about all of us showing Ein and His children the faith they deserve. And with that said….” Diabelle paused, closing her eyes as she bowed her head. We followed her lead as she began to pray. “It’s my deepest honor to begin our evening prayers and to ask our Esteemed Patroness and her Father to bless these two potentials who are about to become shepherds. Guide them on their journey, give them strength and courage, and keep them safe and protect them until we meet again in the great realm of Ein Himself. Ein be praised!”
“Praise be to Ein!” we replied in unison.
“Ein is the most supreme presence in our lives. We are blessed to serve Him.”
“We are blessed to serve Him,” we repeated proudly.
“Ein’s children are the supreme leaders of our realm and our lives,” she prayed.
“Praise their holy names!”
“Without Ein, we are nothing…Without Ein’s love, we are empty.”
“Glory to all that is Ein,” we prayed as one. “Praise to His children and our responsibilities toward them.”
“Ein, we ask You to watch over these potentials as they leave the academy and devote their bodies and souls to Your children…Feniche,” she finished.
“Feniche.” The word echoed in the room as we all fell silent.
-71-
It was the Festival of Ein. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, but its light and heat still lingered in the early autumn night as the royal family and I stepped out onto the marble patio of the Rectory. There were three thrones set out for the king, queen, and prince, and a backless cushioned chair for me to sit on at the prince’s right side. I was scheduled to stay at the Rectory with the prince and his parents for the entire week beginning with this night, and I was enjoying the experience of it all.
The trumpets blared as the royal family and I walked to the balcony’s edge and looked down over the Quelstren countryside. I had expected to see a sea of jubilant Telshakrans, but the crowds were extraordinarily thin in the viewing fields below.
I nudged the prince’s elbow. “I thought more people usually turned out for this?”
“The population is still recovering from the effects of the blood croup. My father said it’ll take a generation or two before we see larger crowds again.”
“Such a horrible, horrible thing that was!” the queen interjected as she hovered close to her son. “But through the darkness came an angel, and I was blessed with Raxis despite the formidable disease that plagued our people.” She smiled and dotingly stroked the back of the prince’s hair.
“Yes, Mother,” the prince said, with a slight roll of his eyes.
I did all I could not to laugh.
Below us in the viewing fields, only a few voices in the crowd sang along as the trumpets played the Anthem of Telshakra. The singing was weaker and less organized than I thought it should have been; it was as if the people of Telshakra had lost interest.
When the trumpets finished the song, we took our seats and waited for the fireworks to begin. The first firework
streaked across the sky and exploded in a beautiful burst of pale tawny light. Then another one burst into a million little blue stars that rained toward the ground. The show continued with explosion after explosion of pale reds, oranges, and bright yellows that sparkled like fire in the sky.
I watched the display, trying to keep my childlike enthusiasm at bay. I didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of the royal family. To have such a vantage point for the show and sit with the royal family at the same time was a rare experience. It was turning out to be an amazing night for me. Yet, at the same time, I couldn’t help but remember the last time I watched fireworks during the Festival of Ein. I missed my family dearly, but I decided to try to enjoy this night, despite the painful memories of my childhood.
Halfway through the show, Shepherd Machoji joined us on the patio, which was a surprise to me, because I hadn’t seen him at orientation earlier that day.
“Did you come to see the show?” The prince smiled toward Machoji.
“I can go find you a chair if you want,” I offered, rising from my chair to leave the patio, but Machoji stopped me.
“No, no. Sit, Vigil, please. Your Majesties, I’ve come bearing news of the opposition,” he said anxiously.
“Oh, Ein save us, what is it now?” the king complained.
“There was another protest by the oppositionists earlier this evening, and several of His Majesty’s royal guards are currently receiving treatment at the Rectory’s hospital for their injuries. Sire, while the resources you’ve allocated to me to quell the previous uprisings have been more than adequate, I regretfully need to ask for more guards to stop the current rioting.”
