by Sue MacKay
Except he wasn’t as soft and soppy as a puppy. He wasn’t anywhere near as trusting either. Just because those glowing eyes snagged his attention more often than he cared to admit, it didn’t mean he was letting her in. There was a steel grill over his heart that would take more than a blow torch to cut through.
If he ever felt he was faltering because Kayla might be moving past his shield then he only had to remember Ryder clinging to his leg and crying that he didn’t want to leave and go with Mummy when he’d been promised a week with his dad. That day was etched in his mind. Leanne stamping her feet and hustling the kids into her top-of-the-range, brand-new wagon, yelling at him that he had no right to promise the boys anything. They were crying because they couldn’t be there for their dad’s birthday.
It had been a horror of an afternoon, and he’d finally backed off because the boys had started getting hysterical. The only way to calm them had been to explain he’d see them in a few days and then they’d have a party, just the three of them. It had been a turning point, though. Since then he and Leanne had worked together for their sons’ sakes, and he had the boys two out of every four weeks. It worked for him.
‘A nurse will give you more painkillers shortly.’ Poke, prod. ‘I’m sending you for X-rays. I don’t think your skull’s fractured, but better to be certain. I suspect some fractured ribs. Your shoulder’s badly bruised and might’ve pulled in the socket so won’t move easily for a few days but it’s not dislocated.’
‘Thanks, Josue. Nothing sounds too bad considering the size of that beam.’
‘You might’ve got off lightly, but no holding fire hoses for a week. No driving until you get the all clear about the concussion.’
‘In other words, get a bank teller’s job.’
‘Or sit at your desk, issuing orders to your staff.’ Josue laughed. ‘It won’t hurt to take a few days off. When was your last break? In the time I’ve been in Queenstown I’ve only ever seen you in work attire, on rescues, or at S and R meetings.’
‘I took time off over the school holidays.’ No denying Josue had a point, though. He did put in a lot of hours at the fire department or with the S and R crowd, practising or doing real jobs when he could, banking time so that when the boys were with him he could step away and let someone else pick up his role temporarily. He hated handing over control but it wasn’t as hard as not being with Ryder and Callum. Balance. That’s what was missing in his life, and he probably wouldn’t find it for a long time to come. Most likely when the kids were adults and able to fend for themselves, and even then he’d be keeping an eye on them.
They were little rascals; adorable and trouble, fun and heartaches. Like most children, from what his mates said about their kids. One day they had him wanting to pull his hair out, the next making him curl up all soft with love as they watched their favourite programme with him. Being a dad was the best thing to ever happen to him, and watch out anyone who got in the way of that, as Leanne had found out when she’d tried to gain full custody. It had taken a while, but he’d finally come to realise she’d had exactly the same fear of losing Callum and Ryder. After that it had all become easier to sort out the divorce details.
A yawn pushed up and out. His body ached with weariness and stabbed with pain. The drug Kayla had given him was definitely wearing off. Kayla. Once again she was in his head. Had she even left? After all this time living alone, why did this particular woman take over his thinking so easily? Why was he thinking about her at all?
She was a head turner. His head was always moving when she was near. He had to see her, get his fill of that open, friendly face, to see her beautiful eyes and those full lips. Hearing her talk in her southern lilt stirred him, as did her light laughter, which didn’t come often enough. Though she had laughed on the way in here. Paramedic reassuring her patient, or had she been so relaxed with him that she’d been a friend as well?
‘I’m giving you an injection before taking you to Radiology.’
Where had Damian come from? ‘How long have I been here?’ he asked the nurse.
‘About thirty minutes. You haven’t asked for anyone to be notified you’re here. Can I get that sorted while you’re having your X-rays?’
He shook his head and immediately regretted it. ‘No.’
‘You sure?’
Which bit of no didn’t he understand? ‘Yes.’ His head was floating again. Was this normal for concussion? Where was Kayla? She’d know. She’d probably already told him but his memory failed him. As long as he got past this concussion sooner rather than later because he had to get out of here before six o’clock. ‘What’s the time?’
‘Three thirty.’
He yielded to the drowsiness engulfing him. He still had plenty of time to get home to the boys.
* * *
Kayla stepped into the ED and looked around for Jamie. She should’ve gone straight home after finishing her shift but, hey, she was here now. Nothing to do with the fact that Jamie had been front of mind whenever she hadn’t been with a patient.
When she and Becca had brought John Baxter in, Jamie had been having X-rays and Josue was busy, so she hadn’t learned anything more about his condition. There was no way she could head home without seeing if there was anything Jamie needed, though she fully expected someone to be here for him by now. He did have a family, right? It wasn’t her role, but there’d been that moment in the ambulance when he’d looked as though he’d been about to ask something of her, as if he didn’t have anyone else to ask. She was probably making it all up because of some warped sense of wanting to get closer to him.
Best get out of here. Go home and unwind. Kayla turned for the exit.
‘You here to see Jamie?’ Josue asked from behind her.
Turning slowly, she looked at Mallory’s fiancé, and kept her mouth shut.
‘He’s in cubicle three. On his own.’ Josue’s smile was gentle, as though he understood she didn’t want to be here when there was little that could keep her away.
‘How is he?’
‘Very lucky there wasn’t more damage. Go see him. I’ll be along in a few minutes. There’re some things I need to talk to him about and I’d like you there.’ He headed away.
She called after him, ‘Jamie might not be happy with that.’ What said she was? Josue seemed to expect her to hang around like she had a role in Jamie’s life, which couldn’t be further from the truth. But Josue knew that so what did he want to raise with Jamie in her presence? It didn’t add up. So, was she leaving, then? Going home? She couldn’t. Not until she’d seen Jamie. She just had to. No reason.
You sure about that, Kayla?
Most definitely.
A wave of sadness touched her. To have another relationship with a loving man would be wonderful, but highly unlikely. Some people didn’t get one go at it. Why would she get a second chance? She was afraid to try again, remember? Even more now she’d met this sexy man. She wouldn’t want to hurt him. Or herself.
Josue continued walking away.
Kayla rubbed her right thigh, easing the aches that had throbbed most of the afternoon. Physical pain she could handle, heartache she could not. She’d learned that lesson.
So go home.
She limped into cubicle three.
Jamie took up most of the bed, his eyes closed, his cheeks white, a bandage wound around his head, another around his shoulder, and large bruises coloured most of his exposed upper body where the sheet had been pushed aside. Jamie in his sleep? The concussion, drugs and shock were taking their toll but his underlying strength came through in his steady breathing and his relaxed hands. He’d do fine.
Kayla fought not to reach out and slip her hand into one of his. Her slim fingers would be warm against his, her palm smooth against his rougher skin, but it was the trust in his face, the gentleness on his lips, the strength in his jawline that were drawing her in. As t
hough he had room in his world for someone else. Quite the opposite of the worry she’d witnessed in his face earlier when she’d asked if there was someone she could call for him. What would he say if she climbed onto the bed and stretched alongside him, draped her arm over his waist and held on?
She had to get away. This was all wrong.
Spinning around, she bumped the chair, making a racket loud enough to wake the dead.
‘Kayla?’ Jamie’s voice was deeper than usual, filled with sleep, and well and truly alive.
She could still run. But she didn’t do running. ‘Hi. Thought I’d see how you’re getting on, but you’re not much fun, sleeping the afternoon away.’
‘What time is it?’ He licked his lips as though they were dry.
‘It’s just after six. Do you want a drink of water?’
‘It’s what?’ He shoved upright, groaned and clutched his head.
‘Careful.’ Kayla reached for him, held him steady.
‘I’ve got to get out of here. I have to get home for my boys.’ He began shuffling his legs off the bed.
‘Whoa. Josue’s coming to talk to you first.’
‘There isn’t time.’
‘Jamie.’ She tapped him. ‘Stop this. You’ve been in an accident. You can’t just up and walk out of hospital. Is there someone else who can look after the boys?’ She had to get away from the unusual sensations he created in her, but first she’d help him out of his predicament.
‘No. Christine’s going out.’
So there was another woman in his life. Gulp. ‘Does she know you’re in here?’
‘Yes, but I told her I’d be back by six so she wouldn’t miss any of her celebration.’
Christine was going out celebrating something when Jamie was in hospital? Okay, now she was confused.
A shadow fell over the bed. Josue had joined them. ‘Lie down, Jamie. I overheard you telling Kayla you’re going home. Sorry, but that’s not happening when there’s no one to keep an eye on you throughout the night.’
‘To hell with keeping an eye on me. It’s my boys who need looking after, and there’s only one person doing that. Me.’
‘You think it’s all right for a six-year-old and a seven-year-old to take care of their père when he’s not in good shape?’ Josue asked.
‘What else am I supposed to do?’ Jamie demanded. ‘You’re saying I can’t go home under any circumstances?’
Josue glanced at Kayla.
So did Jamie.
‘After receiving a concussion it’s important someone’s on hand in case you black out or have a fall.’ The words were out of her mouth without any thought of where this was headed.
‘What are you doing tonight, Kayla?’ Josue asked. ‘Would you be prepared to spend the night at Jamie’s house?’
‘You can’t ask her that. Take no notice of him, Kayla. I’ll ring Ash or someone else from work.’ His voice trailed off and he stared at her as though he hadn’t meant a single word.
‘You sure Christine—’ whoever the heck she was ‘—can’t change her plans for the night?’
‘Not when she already gives up so much for Callum and Ryder. It’s her birthday.’
Wasn’t Jamie more important?
He was watching her. A big ‘O’ appeared on his mouth. ‘She and her husband are neighbours and take care of my lads whenever I can’t be there.’
A knot loosened in her chest. Did she want to help Jamie out? Going back to his house and spending the night, keeping an eye on him and his sons, went against all the arguments she’d put up about staying away from involvement of any kind. She was already at odds with herself about Jamie, wanting to get a little closer and terrified of messing it up. Kayla looked from Josue to Jamie, then at her boots.
‘Nothing you can’t handle, Kayla,’ Josue said.
Yes, there was, but she wasn’t saying it out loud. ‘What are Jamie’s injuries?’
‘Three cracked ribs, mild smoke inhalation, shoulder bruising, a large cut on his head and mild concussion. It’s the last one that I want someone to oversee tonight and as Jamie needs to go home, you’re a great option.’
Thanks.
What other options were there? Jamie wasn’t rushing to say. What else did she have planned for the night? Not watching movies or serials, for sure. She’d had enough of them. After all Jamie had done for her when he’d rescued her, she didn’t want him thinking she wouldn’t do the same, despite the warning bells ringing in her head. She went back to appraising Jamie, who had a look of will-she-won’t-she in that usually steady gaze. ‘I’ll take you home.’ She stared at him. ‘And spend the night at your house.’
The right corner of his mouth lifted in an ironic curve. ‘You’re sure?’
No. I’m stepping outside my comfort zone.
Being chaperoned by two young boys should mean not a minute alone with their father. Was that a good thing? Showed the mess she was in if she didn’t know the answer to that. ‘Absolutely. I’ll just collect some gear from my locker at the station.’ She turned for the exit, glad to be getting away for a few minutes. Fresh air might help settle her mind. ‘Unless I get called out as an extra at a major incident,’ she added less crisply over her shoulder. A six-car pile-up in the middle of town would certainly be a distraction. Guilt squeezed, taking the air out of her lungs. She’d never forgive herself if there was even a car versus rubbish bin with no injuries now.
Her comment was rewarded with a low, rough laugh, which didn’t help her guilt.
Jamie shouldn’t be laughing. He was lying on a hospital bed with his shoulder bound tight and a head filled with stitches and drugs to alleviate pain. Only since Josue had declared there were no other serious injuries had the worry begun to quieten in her chest. If Jamie had been hard to ignore before, now it was impossible.
CHAPTER FIVE
JAMIE WRIGGLED HIS BUTT, trying to get comfortable. It wasn’t working. His head pounded and other parts of his body were having a grizzle. His bed would be far more comfortable but he’d insisted on the couch so he’d be around while the boys got used to Kayla.
‘Ryder, Callum, over here,’ he called. So far they hadn’t said anything about the bandage around his head or the fact he was laid up. They’d just looked at him with their heads to one side and then at each other and had gone out to the family room, but he recognised the denial in their faces. They’d had to deal with so much in their short lives. They returned to stand staring at him, still not saying a word, which said it all. He longed to hug them, but they’d remain remote until they knew everything was going to be all right. ‘Boys, this is Kayla. She’s staying the night to keep an eye on me. I’ve banged my head and hurt my shoulder.’
‘How?’ Ryder asked.
‘At work.’ The less they knew the better. He didn’t want them stressing every time he walked out the door to go on duty. Since that hideous fire, they’d often heard their mother complaining about how dangerous his job was. ‘Nothing serious.’
‘What were you doing?’ Ryder always asked the questions. When Callum wanted to know something tricky he’d get Ryder to do the interrogation. And, man, could Ryder be persistent.
So could he. ‘Listen up, both of you. Remember your manners. Say hello to Kayla.’
‘Hi, guys.’ Kayla was sitting on the armrest at the end of the couch, looking relaxed except for her fingers rubbing her thighs. There wasn’t a wedding ring, but it could be on the gold chain that fell between her breasts, or she might’ve put it away for good. She was widowed, and there’d been no mention of a child. Didn’t she like kids? Or was she just nervous? Kayla?
Try another one, Jamie.
‘Hello, Kayla. I’m Ryder.’
‘I’m Callum. Are you really looking after Dad?’
Jamie blinked. He looked at Kayla, but she wouldn’t understand how unusual that was. Ca
llum was shy around strangers. Seemed Kayla might be an exception. Was that good? His boys were vulnerable, wanted to be loved, then when David had withdrawn from spending time with them they’d become even more cautious. Kayla was only here for the night to keep an eye on him. For them to think she might become a long-term part of his life would be upsetting.
Kayla smiled. ‘I work on the ambulance so I know how to look after your dad. When a person gets a bang on his head, it’s best someone stays with them for a few hours. Is that all right with you both?’
‘Yeah.’
Ryder’s eyes lit up. ‘Can we have takeaway for dinner?’
‘What’s your favourite?’ Kayla asked before Jamie could.
‘Chicken nuggets and chips,’ Ryder was quick to reply.
‘Hot dogs and chips.’ Callum was right behind him.
‘Then guess what you’re having?’ She turned to Jamie and winked. ‘No, I’m not trying to score points. Not being the world’s best cook, I’m thinking about their stomachs. Anyway, I’m too tired to go digging around your pantry.’
He was getting nervous about how well this was going. Ryder and Callum obviously liked Kayla. What did that mean for their future? ‘You could heat up the casserole I prepared last night.’ Though right this minute takeaways sounded a good idea even to him. He rarely bought them, and tonight, give him half an hour and he’d be beyond eating anything. All he wanted was to sleep and then wake up ready to get moving.
‘No, I’m having chicken nuggets.’ Ryder punched the air.
Callum copied the gesture. ‘No, I’m having a hot dog.’
Kayla shrugged. ‘We’d better keep Dad happy. He’s the invalid here. What do you think, Jamie? How about a treat tonight?’
‘What’s an invalid?’
‘Someone useless, lying on a couch while his kids get to choose what they want for dinner.’ It took effort to wink at them. ‘Go on. Order in something to keep them quiet,’ he told Kayla. ‘And something for yourself. I’ll have a beef burger.’ It would probably still be in its box tomorrow morning, but he’d try to get some sustenance on board before he crashed. ‘My card’s here.’
