DIGGIN' UP THE DIRT

by Tonya Kappes

  “It looks great.” I laughed and jumped around when I heard the rumblings of the diesel RV. “How do I look?” I turned to Mama, my heart beating a million miles a minute.

  “Oh dear,” Mama’s smile said it all. Everything she’d been waiting for all her life. Her daughter asking her for fashion advice. “You are nervous, child.”

  “How do I look?” I asked with an exhausted sigh.

  “Amazing.” She pinched a smile, drew her shoulders back and flung the door open in a big Southern and dramatic way. “Welcome.” She drew her arms wide open.

  Over her shoulder, my eyes caught Finn’s and we smiled. I sucked in a deep breath knowing he was here and everything was well with the world. For now.

  After Mama did her formal introductions and finally moved over for the Vincent’s to enter the house, we made our way to the back deck where Mama had a bar set up with every sort of cocktail mix you’d think of.

  Shelby and Clay Vincent.

  Shelby had her hands folded down near her rounded belly. She wore a black mid-calf dress with small white polka dots and a pair of black loafers. Clay wore a button-down shirt, a pair of khakis, and a pair of brown loafers without socks. A very preppy thing to do and I was sure Mama was all over it, which made me think she was for sure going to have Daddy stop wearing socks by this time tomorrow.

  Both Finn’s parents had nice thick hair, both grey, which also told me Finn was going to be grey at some point in his older years. Not me. Mama didn’t dare have a grey hair or she’d plucked them out one at a time. Still, Finn’s dad was definitely a silver fox and by the way Mrs. Vincent had a hold of his arm, she knew exactly what she had.

  They looked like a Shelby and Clay and I gave them a sweet smile, hankering for that drink to help me get over my nerves. I could feel Shelby’s eyes giving me the so this is what my son has been dating onceover. Not sure if it was a good look, since I’d not learned to read her but fully intended to do so tonight. Instead of pondering on it too long, I decided to leave well enough alone and try to engage in conversation best I could.

  Clay had taken dad’s advice and opted for a Kentucky bourbon and coke while Mrs. Vincent picked a red wine from one of Kentucky’s up and coming vineyards. Mama took the time to explain to Mrs. Vincent how the limestone, which made the Kentucky bluegrass so famous, was also what made the grapes for wine in Kentucky so amazing. I wasn’t quite sure if she was serious, but I believed her.

  “How do you think it’s going?” Finn cozied up next to me on the outside couch and asked the question I’d been wanting to ask him for the last ten minutes.

  “I think they’re getting along and Mama sure is acting her best.” I looked deep into his eyes and smiled, wondering why on earth I’d been so nervous about this night. “How do you think they’re going to feel when they see me outside of all this makeup and fancy clothes?”

  “They’re going to love you just like I love you.” Finn’s lips met mine and for a minute we were lost until Mama cried out.

  “Children,” she scolded. “We are still your parents. Where are your manners?”

  “I think it’s sweet.” Mrs. Vincent said with a refreshing tone. “I love seeing my Finny so happy.”

  “Finny?” I drew back and laughed.

  “Mom.” Finn shot his mom a look.

  “I know you told me not to say anything, but he’s our little Finny.” She winked. I instantly loved her.

  She was nothing like Mama. She didn’t try to fix his collar like Mama tried to fluff up the turtleneck on my sweater. When I got up, she tugged the edges of it down over the waist of my pants. Every time I slapped her hand and gave her a look.

  “Thank you for calling him Finny in front of me, Mrs. Vincent.” I couldn’t stop from laughing. Finn had turned red and I’d never seen him in such a flutter.

  “Shelby, dear. Call me Shelby.” She winked and smiled. Her Northern accent caught her name.

  “Supper is ready.” Dad had been making steaks on the grill.

  “Supper?” Shelby asked with a laugh.

  My head snapped towards Mama. Mama’s face reddened.

  “Supper. Your food.” Mama’s tone took a nose dive and fast.

  “Dinner, dear,” Clay spoke up and tapped Shelby on the forearm.

  “We call dinner, supper. Dinner is lunch to us. It’s a Southern thing.” My shoulders shrugged. A subtle jester for Mama to not go off.

  “Yes. It’s Southern. Finn has really been taking to our ways.” Mama repeated, her face softened. “Let’s have dinner now.”

  Mama looked at me and I mouthed “thank you” so she’d know I’d noticed the extra mile she’d just taken to reel in her crazy.

  “That was a close one,” Finn whispered in my ear from behind after we’d followed our parents into the house. “I was afraid Viv was going to give Mom a lesson in Southernisms, though I did warn Mom how she could be.”

  “How she could be?” I flipped around. My brows furrowed when I noticed Preacher Bing had showed up. “What does that mean?”

  “You know how your mom can be.” His brows formed a V and I didn’t like his tone. “Preacher Bing,” Finn said after he looked up from our little chat. “What are you doing here?”

  “Per Vivian’s request, I’ve come to give the blessing over this fine union.” Preacher Bing’s large forehead crinkled when he smiled. His hair was thin and brown, just like the suit he had on.

  My jaw dropped and so did Finn’s. Mama looked between us.

  “I’m sure your parents don’t mind.” Mama stood over the kitchen table where all the food had been laid out. “Preacher Bing.” Mama called him over and did some quick introductions. “I do hope you’ll stay for supper after the blessing.”

  “I’d love to,” his deep voice started to escalate like it did at the Cottonwood Baptist Church right before he was going to ask the congregation to bow their heads to pray. “Shall we bow our heads?”

  Then the shit hit the fan.

  Mr. and Mrs. Vincent, like robots, drew their hands up to their heads to do the sign of the cross. Like real Catholics, not like Mama and her group of Henny Hens. Then my “ah-oh”

  meter went off.

  Preacher Bing started to say a prayer just as the Vincent’s, along with Finn, started to say the Catholic food blessing.

  “Dear Father, we ask that you...” Preach Bing started.

  “Bless us, O Lord, and these, Thy gifts, which we...” The Vincent’s stopped.

  Religion, I groaned. Why had I not even thought about religion?

  “What’s going on here?” Mama opened her eyes and looked around.

  “We are Catholic,” Shelby said, gesturing to Clay and Finn.

  “We are Baptist,” Mama said with a loud Southern, prideful voice. “And as for our house, we will let Preacher Bing say the blessing over this fine meal my husband and I prepared for you.”

  “I think that we will thank the Lord by the sign of the cross.” Shelby did a very dramatic sign of the cross with very pinpointed pronunciation of her words. “Father. Son. Holy Spirit,” she spat.

  “If you think my daughter will ever become Catholic for a boy and his family,” Mama started to say before she began to bounce on her toes. A hissy fit was bubbling up inside of her. “Then you have another thing coming, Finn Vincent!” Mama jabbed her pointer finger her way.

  “If you think our grandchildren are going to be raised Baptist and have supper, you’ve got another thing coming, Kendrick Lowry!” Shelby screamed at me. “Let’s go!” She grabbed Finn with one hand and Clay with the other, jerking them out of the kitchen and out of the house with a dramatic door slam.

  I knew I should’ve listened to my gut.

  “Mama, what’s wrong with you? You made them feel as welcome as an outhouse breeze.” I stomped out of the kitchen. “No one will ever marry me with a
Mama like you!”

  My exit was equally as dramatic as the Vincent’s and my door slam was even louder. I’d done it plenty of times before and knew exactly how to do it right.

  Chapter Five

  There was no sign of the RV on Free Row when I got home. Finn’s Dodge Charger wasn’t even in his driveway. I’d spent all night tossing and turning in the bed, listening for any sounds of cars coming down the street, while trying to tame the catfish supper Bartleby Fry had sent home that hadn’t set well in my belly. Who knew what time I’d finally fallen asleep.

  It was a call on my phone that woke me up. Figuring it was Mama, since she’d had all night to think about her ridiculous behavior, I took my time to reach across my bed and get the phone off the bedside table.

  “Hi, Toots,” I answered knowing it was weird that Toot’s Buford would call me so early and on my cell. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine, but I found something strange when I pulled into work.” She worked as a cashier at the local Piggly Wiggly grocery store.

  “What’s that?” I asked and patted Duke, who was still snoring next to me in the bed. I sat up at the edge of my bed and patted him awake.

  He crawled his front legs to the edge of the bed and slid them off until they hit the floor where he pulled himself into a big long stretch before dragging his back legs off the bed.

  “I pulled in and there’s an RV with tags from Illinois in the parking lot. I think someone is living in it and parked it at the Piggly Wiggly,” she started to describe it as I walked down the hallway. “Now, Kenni. They can’t be goin’ and parkin’ in the Piggly.”

  I let her ramble on knowing it was Finn’s parents, though I wasn’t going to mention it to her.

  “It’s not unusual for RV’s to pull off when the drivers are tired at night. I know that Walmart lets them do it in their parking lot, but I’ll be sure to check it out,” I told her and opened the back door to let Duke rush out into the backyard to do his business.

  There was a bouquet of daisies, a cup of coffee from Ben’s and a note on the porch table.

  “Do you think they’re here to rob me? I mean, I’m the only one opening up this mornin’.” Her voice cracked.

  “No. I’m sure you’re fine. In fact,” I probably shouldn’t have told her because it’d be all over town that Finn’s parents had moved their RV to the grocery store parking lot.

  But after seeing the little love note Finn had left me this morning, I knew I needed to make things right with his parents.

  “Don’t worry. It’s only Finn’s parents. I told them to park it there for the night. Do you mind taking them a few delicious donuts from your bakery and some hot coffee after you get settled in?”

  Piggly Wiggly might be a grocery store, but they did have a great in-house bakery, and it made me wonder if the Sweet Shop had hurt their business.

  “Why, I love that,” Toot’s tone picked up and she sounded more at ease. “I’d love to. I’ll be sure to keep an eye out and when I notice them shades go up, I’ll hurry out there.”

  “Thanks, Toots. I owe ya.” I hung up the phone knowing I’d regret saying that to her one day. Though it was just an expression on my part, but knowing Toots, she’d cash on in the favor owed.

  While Duke ran around and sniffed out all the new smells since last night, I sat down in the chair and took a sip of coffee while I read the note. Finn had written that we weren’t our parents and we were the ones to make the decision about what religion we’d be when the time came. There were a few I love yous and even some x’s and o’s to end that gave me a big smile.

  It was his day to do the early shift of driving around town and making sure all was right with Cottonwood before the day got started. Since Scott had joined us, we made it a point to meet at the department every morning around eight a.m. for a quick briefing of the day.

  The bouquet of daisies, my favorite flower, looked beautiful in the middle of my kitchen table. I stood there with a hip leaned up against my counter staring at them while Duke ate his morning kibble.

  I didn’t waste too much time basking in the joy the flowers gave me before I got ready for work in the usual brown sheriff’s outfit and filled a bag with a sweatshirt and jeans for my weekly girl’s night out Euchre game. It was my night to close the department down, which left me no room to come home and change. If I had any sense, I’d not go tonight since I knew that everyone in town had probably heard about Finn’s parents being Catholic before the stroke of midnight.

  I could just see it now: Mama stomping around the house fussing at Daddy, who was ignoring her and not responding, which made her have to pick up the phone and call everyone on her speed dial.

  “You ready?” I walked down the hall and into the kitchen with my bag of clothes in my grip. I took my phone off the charger and slipped it into my back pocket.

  Duke jumped to his feet and rushed to the back door, thumping his wagging tail against the bottom kitchen cabinets in anticipation of getting a car ride. One of his favorite activities.

  I’d just stopped at the stop sign at the end of the street and rolled down my window and Duke’s window when my phone rang.

  “Finn,” I said his name with a big smile. “Good morning,” I answered. “I was just on my way to our eight a.m. morning meeting. Don’t want to be late.”

  “Sheriff,” He only called me that when there was an emergency.

  “What’s wrong?” My heart fell to my feet. Had something happened with his parents?

  “There’s been a body found in Rock Fence Park.” His words stopped my heart. “I’m not sure who she is, but I have to tell you that your Mama and her walking group found her.”

  He meant the Henny Hens.

  “I’m on my way.” I threw the phone down, grabbed the siren, licked the suction cup and threw the beacon up on top of the roof, jerking the wheel left onto Main Street.

  “Goin’ to be diggin’ up dirt on this one,” the soft whisper came from the back of the Wagoneer.

  My eyes slide to the rearview mirror, but my brain already told me who I was going to see before I looked.

  “Poppa,” I gasped knowing the only time the ghost of my Poppa, Elmer Sims, showed up, it meant one thing.

  There was a murder in Cottonwood and a killer was on the loose.

  “Are you here because...” I gulped, gripping the wheel to keep the tires on the road. “The dead body isn’t just dead...it’s...” I gulped. “Murdered,” I muttered.

  Duke jumped into the back seat and took his happy place next to Poppa.

  “I’ve missed you, boy.” Poppa patted Duke.

  Duke’s tail wagged with excitement. I’d always heard children and dogs could see ghosts, but never truly believed it until Poppa appeared and proved Duke could see him.

  Duke and I were the only ones who knew about Poppa. There’d been a few times that I’d been caught talking to him but was good at acting as if I were talking to myself. The fact that Finn and I were getting closer than just dating, I’d toyed with the idea of letting him know about Poppa’s ghost–that Poppa only showed up when there was a murder in Cottonwood, which made him my Deputy ghost.

  Up until a few years ago, there’d never been crime on my watch as sheriff. It wasn’t until there were two crimes in our small town that Poppa had shown up. All the ideas that there wasn’t crime in Cottonwood due to my amazing job as sheriff had been flattened after Poppa informed me that he’d been running around town in ghost form scaring off any would-be criminals.

  Apparently, a ghost couldn’t be in two places at once, even if he did ghost from one crime to another.

  “I have a sneaky feeling it’s going to be covered and you’re gonna be diggin’ for days to solve this one.” His eyes were sharp and assessing.

  Poppa took his wrinkly hand off Duke and rubbed over his comb-over. He adjusted the collar of his b
rown sheriff’s uniform and neatly tucked in the edges of his shirt into his brown pants. He lifted the flap of the pocket on the front of his shirt.

  “You lookin’ for this?” I held the wheel with one hand and picked up his sheriff’s pin out of the beanbag coffee holder that was draped over the hump on the floorboard between the driver’s side and passenger’s side.

  “I forgot.” He winked.

  “I don’t think you forgot. I think you wanted to remind me to put it on.” I palmed it and moved my hand back to the steering wheel as I took a left at the light off of Main Street to turn onto Oak Street, where Rock Fence Park was located.

  “Oh, Kenni bug,” he referred to me by my nickname he’d given me as a young child, “I’m so proud of you.”

  The siren echoed in the air that filled the park, causing all the citizens who’d already gathered there to turn around.

  “Here comes trouble.” Poppa laughed, referring to Mama, before he ghosted out of the car.

  “Come on, Duke.” I got out of the car after I put Poppa’s pin on my shirt and opened the back door to let him out and get my bag. “Not now, Mama,” I warned her before her opened mouth could vocalize.

  Her pink silky track suit swooshed with each step she took as she got closer to me. She pushed the matching headband a little further up on her forehead. Leave it to Mama to be dressed for the occasion as she did every event in her life.

  “But, Kendrick, we have to talk about this religion issue,” she said through gritted teeth. It was like I was staring into a mirror, all the way down to our green eyes. Only Mama had a few more wrinkles around her eyes. I would never dare to point them out in fear she’d be down at the plastic surgeon in two shakes of a lamb’s tail.

  “Excuse me, Darlin’.” She drew back and sucked in a breath to keep going. “This is going to make a mockery of your relationship and your position here in Cottonwood.”

  “Woooweee.” Poppa stood grinning. “Glad to see some things never change.”