by J B Cantwell
Shame.
“Don’t worry about it, Mom. I’ll be back before you know it.”
Not exactly a lie, but not the truth, either.
Jim opened the front door, and I followed him out into the hall. I turned back.
“Are you coming?”
She paused, then nodded. “Yes, I’m coming.”
He led us to the stairwell. It had been ages since the elevator worked. And besides, if there were any guards downstairs, they would be suspicious of anyone riding it to the bottom, flooded floor.
We quietly made our way down, my socked feet silent on the steps. Then, at the first floor, the beginning of the flood. It was just a few inches of water, but I knew that outside it would get deeper and deeper as the Hudson gradually took over.
I stopped.
“You should stay here,” I said. “They might be back for me, and if they see you both all wet, they’ll figure it out. You’ll both be arrested.”
“I don’t care much about that,” Mom said.
“You don’t care now, but you will later. Besides, I’ll need your help again before all this is through.”
Then, surprising even myself, I stepped up to her and hugged her. She didn’t return it at first, but after a couple moments passed, she hugged me back.
“Okay, I said, pulling away. It’s time. Thanks, Jim. I owe you one.”
“It was no trouble,” he said.
I wondered if he really thought that was true, if he really understood how much trouble this could cause him if he were found out.
But I would be gone. As long as they kept their mouths shut, they would be okay.
“I’ll be in touch as soon as I can,” I said. “Until then, well, be careful. And save up those ration cards. I think we’re going to need them.”
“Okay,” she said, and there were tears in her eyes. She knew that this could be the last time she would ever see me alive.
But there wasn’t enough time, and there wasn’t enough forgiveness yet in my heart. Maybe next time there would be.
I turned, then, and took the few remaining steps down to the first floor. My feet met the water, stagnant and cold, and I made my way down the hall and out of sight.
Chapter Nine
So much for staying dry.
I stayed low in the water, propelling myself with my hands on the concrete below, and then gradually starting to swim in earnest. I knew the water here wasn’t deep, but it would be suicide for me to stand up and tromp through the current.
For the first time ever, I was grateful for the flood’s presence so close to home. To others, it represented the loss of their way of life. To me, it would be my salvation.
I looked around as I swam, but I only saw one guard. My stomach jumped, and I tried to lower myself into the water further. He was looking the other way, though, his attention focused on the street, not the crumbling buildings behind him.
After a couple of nerve-wracking moments, I hit the building I was aiming for. There was an alcove where the front door was, and it would be just enough for me to stay completely out of sight.
The current was stronger the deeper the water got, and once I made it to the door and could stand, I realized that it was all the way up to my thighs. The water didn’t move so fast in the alcove, and I was able to stop and catch my breath.
In front of me was a glass door, a main entrance into the building, already shattered along the bottom pane. I guessed that this place had been looted once people had moved out.
Fine by me.
I bent over and made my way inside. It was as dark as a tomb, but I didn’t stop, just felt my way along the walls until I finally reached the western side. Another glass door awaited me, this one wide open as the current pushed against it. The water was up to my waist, and my heart thudded with fear and anticipation.
Was there any other way?
No. Not that I could see.
I swam out into the dark and said a silent prayer to the universe to get me out of this alive.
But the current was stronger than I thought.
Just stick to the buildings.
I tried to swim at first, fighting the water with every stroke. My boots around my neck got twisted, choking me. I reached up to flip them around, and I went under.
The sound underwater was loud, louder than I would have expected. The water rushed all around me along with garbage from the city’s dumps. I hit the bottom, the water just over my head and kicked against the street hard. I surfaced, frozen and terrified, and tried to remember my training.
Float.
I rolled over onto my back and, for a few desperate moments, let the river take me. Then, as several blocks passed by, I made my escape. The open water was too close, and I would surely die if I ended up out in the middle of the rushing river.
I rolled over and kicked hard with my feet, trying to push myself to the left with my arms. There was a building up ahead. If I could reach it, I’d be able to fight the current.
Soon I was heading straight for it, but I hadn’t prepared myself for the impact against the outer wall of the building. First my hands, then arms, then face slammed up against the brick. I gasped for air, pain shooting through me. I got my legs out from under me and pushed against the wall with them. I had to get around this. I could feel hot tears mingling with freezing water on my face as I struggled through it.
Slowly, I made my way to the left, and with every inch I moved, the current became softer and softer. By the time I made it around the corner, the water was up against my thighs again, and I found I could stand.
I leaned against the building, gasping. My arms and face were going to be covered with bruises, but as far as I could tell, nothing was broken. Far in the distance, several blocks away, the guards were patrolling, waiting for me to show myself. But down here, so far from the apartment complex, I remained invisible.
I trudged toward dry ground, not bothering to try to hide myself. The sky had become inky black with just a handful of stars visible, and the moon hadn’t yet risen.
Finally, I made it to high ground, stepping from the water to the sidewalk with my soaked feet, still in just my socks. I collapsed to the ground and leaned my back up against the wall. It had been a good idea, but it didn’t feel like it now.
After a couple minutes, I pulled my boots from around my neck and stuffed them onto my feet. It was going to be a long, wet walk, and I shivered in the evening air.
When I finally stood up again, I found my legs were wobbly beneath me. It took me several steps before I felt I could trust them to carry me.
I reached the corner of the building and peered around it, back up the street toward Mom’s apartment. Some people were out, probably returning from work, just enough to keep the guards busy as they waited for me to finally emerge.
I smirked and ran across the street, feet squishing inside my wet boots. It was just a matter of hiding now, especially around here. I ducked around alley after alley, but nobody followed as I ran through. The homeless burned what garbage they could find, eating the scraps of the already-poor. They would’ve done much better in the city, but encampments like this would’ve never been allowed.
I found an empty alley and sat down against the wall, well hidden. Kiyah had said she would find me, but would she be able to now? I was far away from my expected whereabouts, and I seriously considered going into The Bronx on my own.
Then again, I would have no way of reaching Alex if I made the journey without telling Kiyah first.
So I sat and rested for the time being. She must’ve seen what had happened to me over the past twenty-four hours. She must know, if only vaguely, where I was. Maybe she’d even seen me bobbing by in the river as I made my escape.
I waited. Soon enough, with or without Kiyah, I would need to move. It was already too dangerous for me to be at home with my mother, too risky to make my way back to headquarters, not to mention the fact that I was drenched and growing colder by the minute. I only had one
option.
Get moving.
I wasn’t ready. I was too exhausted. But I felt frozen solid. I got up to leave and peered around the corner. It had to be midnight by now. If I left now, I would make it to the zoo just before dawn.
With no guards and no Kiyah in sight, I walked out of the alley and started toward Alex. Somehow, I believed we would find each other, even though the probability seemed to be getting less with every day that passed. With every hour, even.
But it would happen. We were like two magnets being held apart by opposing forces. But it was only a matter of time. We would meet again.
It didn’t take her long to find me. Once I was on the move, she caught up, quietly tapping me on the shoulder, making me jump.
“I saw you,” she said, falling into step beside me. “I lost you for a while once you went into the river, so I waited for you to come out of hiding.”
“They shouldn’t call you a runner,” I whispered. “They should call you a tracker.”
She shrugged. “Well, I do have some experience tracking down the Volunteers, mostly people who got lost. Or people who went back to a regular life. Especially those who did it without warning.”
“Why would you track them? Weren’t they allowed to return to a regular life if they wanted?”
“They could. It wasn’t exactly a rule that they were breaking, but we needed some assurances once people left the group. The Volunteers were never very good at keeping secrets. There was no segmentation to the group, no real hierarchy.”
“Really? But you had that leader I met with my first day at the Stilts. How could he be in charge if there was no hierarchy?”
“It wasn’t so much that he wasn’t in charge, but that there weren’t enough secrets to keep us all safe. In the end, almost everyone knew about our plans. Everyone is too many. And when people tried to leave the group, it made things harder.”
It had never occurred to me that anyone would want to leave the Volunteers. It was almost like a religion, being a Volunteer, believing in their work.
But then, I supposed, it must’ve been difficult to survive as one. No credits. No food. Barely enough of everything to get by. And the kids. All those kids growing up hungry and in hiding. It must’ve been difficult, especially for those on the fringes, for those who weren’t sure.
“Well, I’m glad you tracked me down,” I said. “I was just heading up there blind, hoping you would find me. Can you get word to them, to Alex, that I’m coming?”
“I will. But you need to understand that they’ll be waiting for you. All of them.”
“What do you mean, all of them?”
“The Volunteers aren’t the only ones who have defectors. The Champions, especially, have spies within their midst. The Service already knows that they have Alex, but they haven’t moved in to take him yet. And once I get up there to tell the Champions about you, the Service will try to make their move.”
My stomach twisted.
“It’s the only way, though,” I said. “It’s the only way I can see him again, isn’t it?”
“I don’t know. Everyone is using the two of you to bait one another. Whoever catches you both could be anyone’s victory.”
I tried to think of the options that were in front of me. I could be taken by the Service and be tortured and probably killed, alone. I could go with the Champions and get stuck in their trap, with Alex. I could go back to my Volunteers and try to make a go of things on my own. Or I could flee. I could run north, start again, make it to Canada and forget my past.
The Service was out. So was fleeing. I felt safe with my new group, but how could I lead them on my own without Alex by my side?
Alex had never wanted to be a Volunteer. I wondered what was left of him now. I had spent months at the Burn. What had the Service done to him in that amount of time? Whatever it was, it wasn’t enough to completely brainwash him like before. He had stolen that weapon. There had to be some of him left.
Of course, I didn’t really have a choice at all. I would go and wait for him, just like we had planned.
I stopped walking and turned to Kiyah. “I’ll go. Try to get to him before the others if you can. Maybe he can get out.”
“Just remember, they’re using him as bait for you, too. They’ll be trying to recruit you, to force Alex, or you, to give up the location of the weapon.”
“Understood.”
I wondered what kind of tactics they might use on me to get me to spill information I didn’t have.
“I’ll do what I can,” she said. “You sure you want to do this?”
I didn’t speak, just stared off into space for a moment, trying to think. My brain was a fog, but only one answer came to me.
Yes.
“Go,” I said. “And tell them I’m coming.”
Coming for them all.
Chapter Ten
Even if it meant the death of me.
Five hours later, I found myself slinking through the streets near the zoo. Kiyah had made the trip up here to let the Champions know I was on my way, that I would give myself up in exchange for Alex. She was still hooked into the lens system, a Green, able to travel using the regular channels. She would’ve made it up the The Bronx inside an hour.
So, now they were waiting. Waiting for me.
I didn’t move quickly anymore. There had to be a way for me to signal to him, to let him know that I was here, that I had come for him.
Unlike Brooklyn, The Bronx had stayed dry over the years, no wall required. The buildings all around me were inhabited, and even though it was four in the morning, there were a few people out on the streets.
I tried to stick close to the alleyways, but I still got some confused stares. I hoped that the people stumbling out of the bars chalked up my lack of designation to their own drunkenness.
Finally, when I was six blocks away, I stopped.
There was nowhere to hide for me up here. The underground subways were still in use, so that was out. The only way for me to get there was to walk straight into what would undoubtedly be a gun fight. The only question was, who would get to me first?
I slipped into one of the uninhabited alleyways and stood thinking, waiting for an answer to materialize in my brain. It would be light in a couple hours. If I waited that long, the morning crowd would start to question me, wanting to know my designation. Authorities would be called. I would be picked up.
But I couldn’t walk into the Service’s trap. I couldn’t go with them again. It would be the end of me in every way imaginable. They would use Alex against me. My mother. My Volunteers. It would be over. Everything.
Kiyah had told me to hide at the zoo like Alex and I had planned. But she wasn’t seeing the bigger picture. The decisions before me were left for me alone to make. And there was no room for mistakes.
Of course, though, my choice was made, and when it came down to it, it really was the only option in front of me.
I would join the Champions. I would get to Alex at all costs.
I thought about the Volunteers back at our base. They must’ve been confused. No Jonathan. No me. I hoped that Melanie was taking charge, that she was figuring out what to do next. That maybe even Jay was helping. They would assume the worst. Maybe they would even flee north like the others had. Or maybe they would wait for me, hoping that I’d survived.
And Mom and Jim. What would they be told if I was captured by the Champions? They wouldn’t be safe no matter what happened to me, and the thought made my stomach hurt. I wished I hadn’t dragged them into this, but if I was honest with myself, they would’ve been arrested eventually, with or without me. Just the act of knowing me was enough to get someone into trouble.
I pushed off the building, my decision finally cemented in my mind. I would find him. Them. But I wasn’t ready to be captured again by the government. I had to stay far away from our planned meeting place.
I left a six block perimeter around the zoo. Maybe he was waiting there, maybe not, but the S
ervice soldiers were certainly out in force, already informed by whoever it was who’d gone rogue against the Champions. Instead of going into the fray, I started skirting the buildings around the fifth block away from the entrance. Then, gradually, moving in on the fourth block.
I kept an eye out, hoping for Kiyah to materialize again, but there was no sign of her.
It was just me.
I circled around, hiding in alcoves and alleys as I gradually made my way closer to the zoo.
I was mistaken, though, thinking that I could join the Champions, that it could be as simple as that. Because when I felt the gun click against the back of my head, I knew it was game over.
My breath caught.
“Don’t scream,” someone said, a woman. “Start walking. I want you to go straight to the entrance. Do what they’re expecting you to do.” She moved the gun from my head to my back, and then came around the side of me, holding the gun as if she had her arm around me.
“Who are you?” I asked.
“You don’t need to know that. All you need to know is that this was part of the plan all along. Leave no stone.”
I snorted and stopped walking. “If you think something as silly as a password is going to make me trust you, or anyone anymore, you’re a fool.”
Just as Kiyah had said, there had been defectors from the Volunteers, and certainly some of them had ended up with the Champions. Maybe even some with the Service. In any case, the words no longer had meaning. If anything, they were enough to tell me that I was dealing with someone untrustworthy. It didn’t take a gun in my back to convince me, just those three little words.
“Move,” she said.
“Where to?”
“To the zoo.”
“But why? If you take me there, I’ll just get picked up by the Service.”
“That’s exactly what I want.”
“What?”
I stopped walking again, turning around to face her, her gun pushing into my stomach now.
“If you think I’m going to walk into a trap and let the Service get ahold of me again, you’re nuts.”
