by Laura Riley
“Honestly, mate, I haven’t got the money to outlay. It’s not just that, we’d be landlords. Tenants can be a real pain in the ass.”
The corners of his eyes crinkle. “Don’t I know it.”
“Hey.” I toss a broken piece of plasterboard in his direction. “I’m the perfect tenant.”
I’ve been renting my house from Cole for fifteen months. Anna left me with a seventy-thousand-pound credit card debt. Due to her online gambling addiction I had to sell our house to pay off her debt. My baby lost her mum and home in the space of a week.
What Ellie needs now more than ever is security, not me chasing dreams.
Since becoming a single dad, I’ve managed to save twelve thousand pounds and book my little girl a dream holiday to Disney World. With the six thousand pounds I have remaining my hope is that by the end of the year I will have enough saved to buy the house I’m renting. Cole has even offered to sell it to me for fifty thousand pounds below the asking price.
Cole rocks on his heels. “I’ve spoken to Rick about the business venture and he’s up for it.”
Of course Rick is up for it, he hasn’t got kids or responsibilities other than getting his arse out of bed in the morning. Growing bored, I push my goggles up the bridge of my nose and clasp my stepladder.
“You don’t have to invest any of your own money.”
I stand statue-like. A free business venture? I’m interested to see where this is going. “Go on.”
Cole sucks in a long breath. “There’s an auction next Monday in Bristol. I want you to go. If something catches your eye, then bid on it. I’ll pay your share, and when we sell up you can have the profit minus what I outlaid. Sixty-six percent of the risk is on my shoulders then, you can’t lose. With the extra money, you can buy the house.”
This could solve all my financial problems overnight. He has no idea how much easier it’ll be to breathe. I make my way towards him. I feel a bro-hug is in order. “Cole—”
He waves his hand dismissively. “You’re welcome.”
I watch him leave and text my sister to tell her the news. My signal bar is crawling and the text refuses to send.
Endless possibilities fill my mind. Cole specified that I wasn’t to decorate whilst renting, but the first thing I’m going to do when the house is mine is paint Ellie’s bedroom.
I feel like I’ve got a spring in my step. I spend an hour rewiring the lights, feeding the cables through the joists. Every so often I return to the window to steal a glimpse at Lizzie. I’ve got to apologise to her for my behaviour. I jog down the stairs. “Taking a break,” I call up to Rick and Cole, who are in the loft.
I pass through a narrow hallway. Knowing I haven’t got a lot of time, I hurry through the kitchen and to the garden.
She’s lying on a stripy blanket. Her face is turned away from me and she is resting her head on her arms. She’s wearing a black strappy t-shirt and cute denim shorts that hug her ass, which I can’t take my eyes off. I watch her for longer than is necessary.
“Either lotion my back or move. You’re blocking the sun.”
Great. Now I look like a stalker, casting a dark shadow over her. I step back. “I’m sorry. Er, about Saturday night, I was drunk and…”
Lizzie spins round, taking up a sitting position. Using her hand as a visor, she looks up at me. “I thought you were Cole.”
I hold out my arms. “Nope, just me.”
My eyes take a detour to her breasts, and it’s there they stay. I’ve completely forgotten what it was I wanted to say.
So leave, stalker, and stop checking her out.
She looks at me expectantly. “Would you mind?”
Oh, great, now she thinks I’m a perv. “Sorry.” Turning my back on her, I’m about to make a beeline for the house when she calls after me.
“Seth.”
I turn back to face her. Sweet Jesus, I should have kept going and not looked back. She’s holding her hair to the side, giving me the perfect view of her back and her neck. “I’m burning.”
The lotion, right.
I grab the bottle from the ground and do as she requests. I squirt the white liquid into my hands, applying it to her back, rubbing it in in small circular motions.
Her skin feels so soft. Without thinking, I slide the thin strap of her t-shirt down, pressing slightly firmer.
“That feels good.” She almost moans. Is she getting off on this?
Shit, I’m enjoying this way too much. “All done.” I jump up, giving her shoulder a friendly pat.
“Wait,” she calls after me.
Keep walking, keep walking.
“Yes?” My traitorous feet take me right to her, and I sit at her side.
She looks down, picking at the frayed edge on the blanket. “I forgive you.”
“For what?”
Wanting to stick my tongue in your mouth, staring at your ass and then your tits, and thinking of all the ways I’d like to fuck you?
“We’d both had too much to drink. I shouldn’t have slapped you.”
Instinctively, I rub my hand over my cheek. “It’s okay. I was completely out of order. I shouldn’t have said what I did. There was no excuse.”
“It was a good night though,” she muses.
“Yeah. I kinda needed it, you know.”
Her eyes go wide. “No, I don’t know.”
I don’t need a shoulder to cry on, or someone to listen whilst I vent. I’d rather keep some parts of my life hidden away.
Her hair is picked up by the soft breeze and all I can do is stare at her face. The more I sit staring at her, the more this feels like some kind of moment.
I can feel myself start to retreat. “I’ve got to go.”
She reaches for my hand. “Please, stay. Just for a bit longer. It’s been forever since I saw you, and seeing as we’re both sober, it’d be nice to catch up.”
She wants to pry, she means. That’s all people do, ask me questions about my life, my ex, my daughter. Brick by brick, I’ve built a fortress around my heart, around my truths. No one will penetrate the bricks, or even rattle the foundations.
I shake my head. “I can’t.”
She frowns. “Why not?”
I pull my phone out of my pocket. “I’ve got to ring my sister, see how my daughter is.”
“I’ve heard all about Ellie. How is she?”
“She’s fine.” My tone is more abrupt than I had intended.
Lizzie leans forwards. “I’d love to see a picture of her.”
“Some other time. I’ve got to ring my sister.” I jump up. Message after message flashes on the screen of my phone, texts from Darcy. Now I finally have signal.
Panic wraps its invisible fingers around my throat, squeezing. What if something’s happened to Ellie?
Lizzie falls into insignificance.
I don’t read any of the texts. Images of every awful scenario flash through my mind. My heart’s racing. With shaky fingers, I scroll and click Darcy’s name. It rings three times before she answers.
“Is Ellie okay?” I bark.
“Jesus, Seth, she’s fine.”
“What’s the problem then?”
“If you calm down and stop shouting at me, I’ll tell you.”
I feel a hand on my arm from behind. It’s Lizzie’s. I pull from her embrace; all I can think about is Ellie. I’m extremely protective over her, I can’t help it.
I scuff my foot on the floor. “Well—”
“Alice had an accident at work.”
I let out a harsh breath. “And that affects me how?”
“I’ve got to cover some of her shifts.”
I shake my head. “Your job is looking after Ellie. I pay you to have her.”
“It’s only for the next couple of weeks until they can find cover. I’ve got to go in this afternoon.”
“Seriously, Darce?” Blindly I feel around my work pouch. I’m making a mental note of what tools I’ve got on me and what I’ll be leaving here. “
Don’t worry, I’ll come home right away.”
“You don’t have to, I’m outside.”
My hand falls to my side. “Outside where?”
She cuts the call. Does she mean she’s outside Lizzie’s house? Sure, she knows I’m working here, but it’s not like my sister to turn up at one of my jobs.
Leaving Lizzie in the garden, I run back through the house and to the front door, which Cole is already opening. My sister and Ellie stand outside on the welcome mat.
Cole looks at me. “What is it, Bring Your Kid to Work Day? She can’t stay.”
I clench my fists. “I know that.”
Ellie hides behind Darcy. Of course she does—she isn’t good with new surroundings and strange faces. Although she’s familiar with Cole and Rick, she isn’t comfortable around them. Shit, she’s only comfortable around me and my sisters, Imogen and Darcy.
I walk towards my little girl. My car keys jingle as I yank them from my trouser pocket. “I’m gonna get going, Cole.”
“You can’t.”
Scowling, I face him. “What do you mean I can’t?”
I know how Ellie gets with strange people, and I wouldn’t get a sitter at such short notice. I can’t, I won’t do that to her.
He shrugs and attempts to look concerned. “We’re on a deadline, two weeks to get this finished before our next job starts. Sorry, mate, but I need you here.”
Mate? Mate? I feel like wringing his damn neck. “You said it yourself, she can’t stay,” I spit out. “So, Einstein, enlighten me, who’s going to mind Ellie while I work?”
Cole’s eyes move around the hall. He smiles and clears his throat. “Lizzie’s off work for the school holidays. She can mind her.”
Lizzie
I’ll look after his daughter, will I?
I blow out my cheeks. Trust my brother to come up with such an ingenious idea. He talks as though me being off work means I have nothing better to do. Is he forgetting the work I do over the summer? I have several meetings with the head of the art department, my class displays to arrange, and not forgetting the supplies I need to order ready for September.
“Come on, Lizzie,” Cole pleads, clasping his hands together as if praying. “You’re a teacher. You work with kids every day.”
I look at the little girl. She’s dressed in a pink summer dress with a pink embroidered flamingo on the breast pocket. She has her father’s blue eyes. Her mousy brown hair is totally wild—it doesn’t look as though it’s ever seen a brush. She’s a pretty little thing, or she would be if she wasn’t frowning.
I speak in a hushed voice that only my brother will hear. “I work with teenagers, Cole. I’d have no idea what to do with a child her age.”
Cole’s jaw ticks and he stares at me expectantly, like he’s waiting for me to have some kind of epiphany and be totally fine with babysitting. Sure, I like little kids, but from afar. I don’t feel comfortable looking after one.
“Just give her a bowl of popcorn and sit her in front of the TV.”
Seth scrapes his hand through his hair. “Cole, it’s not as easy as that. You know about Ellie’s issues.”
Ellie’s issues?
Cole jerks his head in the direction of the stairs. “You’re working upstairs. What do you think’s going to happen to her? We have another job starting in a couple of weeks and I want this finished. All hands on deck.”
I glance at Darcy. She’s wearing a blue work tunic and matching trousers. Looks as though she’s wearing scrubs. Like Seth, she’s tall. She has short brown hair and hazel eyes that pingpong between Seth and Cole. She shakes her head. “As entertaining as this is. I’ll let you boys argue this out between one another.”
Without another word she gently nudges the little girl over the doorstep onto the hessian mat inside.
The little girl’s face reddens, and for a moment it looks as though she’s holding her breath. With teary eyes she runs to Seth and buries her head into his work trousers, her hair adhering to the thick blue material.
Cole’s nostrils flare. “I can’t stand here all day arguing. I have work to do. Just let Lizzie watch her today.”
Seth glowers at me, his good looks devoured by a scowl. “Whatever,” he snaps, aiming his frustration at me. “I will finish the boarding and then I’m off. I’ll be taking Ellie home.”
The intensity of his stare is getting too much. I glance out of the front door and see Darcy removing a child’s booster seat from her car. She offers me an apologetic smile before she places the seat on the driveway, in front of Seth’s work van.
I look back in the hallway. Cole’s already left. I can hear him hammering loudly upstairs.
I’m standing, my arms folded, as Seth pries his little girl from him, one finger at a time.
“Ellie’s not like other little girls, Lizzie, she has… she has some issues.” His voice is little more than a whisper, as though he doesn’t want Ellie to overhear him talking about her.
There goes that word again. “What do you mean?”
Shaking his head, he bends down on one knee, brushing hair behind the little girl’s ears. “Sweetheart, it’ll just be for a little while, I promise. You can have some ice cream when we get home. What do you say?”
As pissed as I am right now, it warms my heart to see the way he looks into his daughter’s eyes. Their stare remains unbroken and he waits for her to reply. After long drawn-out seconds he stands. He looks at me one final time before storming up the stairs.
I’m standing in the hall, alone with this young girl. I teach kids for a living; how hard can this be? “Come on, Ellie.” I hold my hand out, expecting her to take it, but she takes a step away from me. I take a step towards her and wrap my fingers around her wrist. She stiffens at my touch.
I crouch down, plastering a smile on my face. “I haven’t got ice cream or popcorn, but I have cookies.” My voice is unnaturally high-pitched and sounds like I’ve been sucking on a helium balloon.
No reply. No wonder.
Try not to sound like Minnie Mouse this time, Lizzie.
I clear my throat. “I’ve got paints in the cupboard. How about we paint your daddy a picture? We can sit in the garden if you like, there’s a table and chairs out there.”
Much better. Less like Minnie Mouse and more like me. Ellie glances up the stairs and back to the floor.
“Come on, sweetie.”
She drops her shoulders and drags her feet as I guide her out of the hallway and into the lounge.
“Do you want to paint?”
She shakes her head.
I glance around the room. It’s not exactly kid-friendly. I don’t have anything apart from my art supplies that would occupy her. I suck in my lower lip. What does a child her age like to do? I don’t even know how old she is. Seven, eight? I glance down and realise the whole time I’ve been lost in my thoughts she’s been staring at a blank TV. I glance around and spot the remote control on the arm of my settee. “How about I put the TV on and we find a cartoon?”
She shakes her head, this time with more certainty. I get the feeling she doesn’t like me. I open my mouth to suggest making cakes when she tears her wrist from my grasp and runs out of the room. I trip over my feet, then rush after her, but by the time I make it into the hallway she’s already halfway up the stairs.
“Daddy!” she screams, sheer panic in her voice.
She makes it all the way up the stairs and to my bedroom before I catch up with her. Seth is balancing on a pair of stepladders. Rick, a few feet away, stands on stilts. Together they’re nailing a length of white plasterboard to the ceiling’s wooden joists.
Looking up, I can’t help but admire Seth’s broad chest and muscular arms. He turns his head and instead of a smile, I get another scowl.
“Ellie, can you go downstairs, please, sweetheart?” he says sweetly, yet sternly. His jaw ticks before his eyes narrow. “Lizzie, can you get her out of here?”
Ellie’s lower lip quivers, and she steps away when I at
tempt to take her hand. Blowing out my cheeks, I wrap my hands around her shoulders.
“Come on,” I say, leading her out onto the landing, and together we walk down the stairs.
I don’t ask what she wants to do, instead guide her into the kitchen. I pour her a glass of orange juice and scatter a couple of cookies on a plate. Picking her up, I place her on a ladder-backed chair next to the breakfast bar. I sit opposite.
Humming to myself, I cross and uncross my legs. I try not to stare at her, so sporadically check social media on my phone. Realising I’ve been looking at my screen for the past five minutes, I glance up, giving the little girl my undivided attention. Her head is bowed. The juice I poured for her is untouched. The cookies I laid out for her still lie on the plate. The only things nearing Ellie’s mouth are her fingers, which she chews.
I teach kids for a living, and yet I’m at a loss as what to do with this one.
I scroll to Amber’s name in my contact list. She has a young daughter, she’ll know what I should do.
Me: Help.
Little dots appear under my text. I can see she’s typing back.
Amber: What’s up?
Me: I’ve got to babysit Seth’s daughter.
Amber: Playing Mummy already?
Me: Ha. Ha. She hates me. I have no idea what to do with her.
Amber: How old is she?
Me: The hell should I know?
I glance at Ellie. Although she’s tall, facially I don’t think she’s as old as I first thought.
Me: Around the same age as Freja, maybe older.
Amber’s name appears on my screen. She’s calling me. I turn my back to Ellie and accept the call.
“Stop overthinking it, Lizzie. Take her to the park or the beach, kids love anything like that.”
I sigh, toying with a lock of hair. “I don’t think anything will work.”
“Sure it will. I could always drop by with Freja. Ask Ellie if she’d like a little friend to play with—”
Turning, I glance towards the chair where I sat her. Damn it, she’s gone.
