by Becca Monroe
“God baby, I want to be inside you,” I confessed between hungry kisses.
“Please,” she whispered. “I want that too.”
I removed the towel from my waist, her hand wrapped around my shaft, and my need for her spiked.
Three loud knocks wrapped on the bedroom door, forcing us both to stop. “Yeah?” I yelled, not even trying to hide the irritation in my voice.
“Man, everyone is here now, you’re being a terrible host. Get your ass out here,” Josh scolded from behind the closed door.
“Be out in a minute!” I yelled.
I looked down at her and we both started laughing.
“We are being horrible hosts,” she said. She glanced in the mirror after I helped her off the bed. “Oh my God, they are going to know what we were doing. Look at me.”
Coming up behind her, I looked at her in the mirror. “I’m looking at you and you’re beautiful. We will pick this up on our weekend away. I’m not letting you run from me.”
Her face grew serious. “Jake, we need to talk about…”
“Not tonight. We are going to enjoy our day and evening with our friends, then tonight, I’m holding you in my arms again. We can talk tomorrow, but today is our time to make good holiday memories for all of us.”
She turned to face me, her eyes holding concern. “Are you alright from earlier? They said it was about Callie. You can talk to me about her, you know.”
I nodded. The last thing I wanted to do was spend our first Holiday together, talking about Callie. “They are right about her and everything they said. I should have listened years ago. She lied about who she really was, and I believed everything that came out of her mouth. She was never mine. It was my fault, but it’s over now. You’re my future.”
“You sound so certain when you say that,” she said. “How do you know?”
My finger went under her chin. “You know it too, your fear just prevents you from admitting it. Until you’re ready, I’ll know it for both of us. But this weekend, baby girl, you’re all mine.”
Delaney
Dinner was perfect in every way. I couldn’t stop smiling as I watched everyone eating, laughing, and having a wonderful time. Both turkeys turned out wonderfully. The stuffing and potatoes were perfect.
This was the holiday I dreamed about and wanted ever since I could remember. A home filled with love and laughter and one-day kids. I shook my head, trying to force the thought out of my head. The doorbell rang, and I heard a shrill laugh coming from the entryway.
Josie called for Jake, who immediately went to the entry. “Where is he?”
I knew that voice. Brittney.
“Jake!” She yelled, her voice obnoxious, her speech slurred. I stepped into the foyer as Jake and Mike entered.
She pointed to me. “What the hell are you doing here?” she slurred, open wine bottle in hand. “Heard you were having a nice holiday dinner and realized I was good enough for you to have sex with, but not to invite for turkey! Ha!” She laughed.
“So, here I am!” She held her arms out to her sides, with the wine bottle and dangling from her fingertips, and spun around in a circle. A friend of hers walked through the front door behind her.
“I’m sorry, she drove here drunk. We followed her, trying to stop her, but she wouldn’t listen to reason,” her friend looked mortified.
Jake stepped forward. “Brittney, hand me the wine bottle and come talk to me.” His voice was soft and kind, not cruel or judgmental. She looked over at him, as tears formed in her eyes.
She dropped to the floor and cried. “You used me,” she sobbed. “I cared about you and you used me.”
She looked up at him with pain in her eyes. “Why wasn’t I good enough? Why am I never good enough for the men in my life?”
Jake kneeled beside her. “Brittany, you are good enough, but we were never a couple. Both of us drive each other nuts, but it doesn’t mean I wish you harm. You need to take care of yourself. I want you to be happy.”
“I’ll never be happy,” she cried. “Dad, you, and him,” she whispered, pointing to Mike.
Mike patted Jake on the shoulder. “I’ve got her, see to your guests. I’ll make sure she gets home and head back out later.”
Jake shot him a questioning look. “You sure?”
“Yes,” Mike said, kneeling beside her.
“Hey hon, let’s get you home, okay?” He whispered. Mike handed the wine bottle to her friend and lifted her in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and laid her head on his shoulder.
“You hate me too,” she said, sniffling between tears.
“I would never hate you. Come on now, it’s Thanksgiving, let’s get you home.”
They left, and I walked back into the kitchen to finish the dishes, my hands shaking, as my heart ached for her. She was never kind to me, but that behavior usually came from a place of deep pain. At least, that’s what I tried to tell myself to justify the reasons people could be cruel to one another.
Mary smiled as we were doing the dishes and putting the last of them away.
“What is that grin on your face about?” I asked.
“Seeing you here, in Jake’s home, and him tending to you today, was a wonderful sight to witness.”
“Tending to me?”
Mary held a knowing smile on her face and her words spilled out of her as if she couldn’t contain them any longer. “Throughout the afternoon I watched him come up behind you to kiss your cheek, whisper things to you, get you wine when you were out, and ask if you needed anything. When you were laughing or talking to friends, his eyes were always on you, ensuring you were alright. My son is in love with you.”
I felt the color drain from my face.
“He shouldn’t love me,” I whispered. “He can’t.”
Mary took my arm and led me over to one stool by the island. “Child, I know you are hiding, but there’s no need to hide anymore. Why can’t he love you?”
“It’s better for him if he doesn’t. Mary, it’s safer for him if he stays away. Maybe it’s best if I leave.”
Mary shook her head. “My son has never run away from a fight in his life. He isn’t afraid of another human being if it’s one whose threatening those he cares about. I realize you’re scared, and I understand that. But, it’s important for you to understand that I’ve been where you are, sweet girl. A lifetime ago, it seems now. Let me help. Let us help.”
I smiled as the tears continued to build in my eyes. “Today was magical for me. It was everything I ever wanted for a holiday. Friends and all the people I care about close to me, almost like a dream.”
Jake’s deep voice broke my train of thought. “But baby, it wasn’t a dream. It was real, it is real. I love you being here and sharing it with me and everyone.”
He’d walked into the kitchen at some point. How much of the conversation between his mother and I had he heard? I didn’t know.
I wiped my eyes and went to the refrigerator. “Pies! I almost forgot the whipping cream for the pies!” Jake stood in front of the doors to the refrigerator, ignoring my declaration.
His eyes locked on me. “Tell us why you’re scared.”
Looking between Mary and Jake for a way out of this was too much.
“You can let go of the fear now. Don’t you see that? We all love you,” Mary said.
“Thank you both for saying you care, but everything is okay, or it will be. I won’t bring you into my past, so let’s just get dessert and finish our evening. Today has been wonderful, and I don’t want it ending on a deadly topic.”
Jake’s eyebrows lifted in concern, “Deadly?”
“I meant horrible ok? A sad topic that I don’t want to discuss on this perfect day. Please let it go,” I pleaded.
Jake hugged me to him and brought his mouth to my ear, whispering so only I could hear. “I’m here and will listen when you’re ready. I can’t wait to have you all to myself this weekend,” he said.
CHAPTER EIGHT
> Jake
When the last of the guests had left for the night, and Josh turned in, the only thing on my mind was time alone with Delaney. The conversation I overheard with her and momma confirmed she had things in her past she was hiding from, but who or what, I didn’t know. All I knew was that I loved Delaney Newcomb and the more time I spent with her, the harder I was falling for her.
I wanted her to stay in Alaska, not because she had to, but because she wanted to stay with me. So many things ran through my mind that I wanted with her. A future, her in my home, my life, and the thought of having her in my bed was everything.
She came out of the bathroom with just her NYU t-shirt and panties on. My eyes followed her from the bathroom door to the bed where I was lying, propped up on my elbows. Delaney was a beautiful woman, but her heart was what I loved the most. The way she poured love into her smiles towards others, her conversations, and today, even the food she prepared-made her more attractive to me.
Far beyond her stunning physical beauty. Her eyes looked timid tonight, unsure of what the next few hours would bring. “Are you tired?” I asked, praying she wasn’t.
Delaney kneeled on the bed beside me. “Jake,” she said.
I reached out and took her hand in mine, pulling her closer. “What is it?”
“You said if we made love, that I was yours and you were mine and you wouldn’t let me go. Did you mean that?”
“Yes, I meant it. Why? Does that scare you?” I asked.
She swallowed hard and took a deep breath. “I need to tell you something important, so can you please not say anything until I’m done?”
I sat up, leaning against the headboard. “Okay, I promise to let you finish whatever you need to tell me.”
“When I first arrived here, I met your mother, Josh, Mike and Josie, and I loved them all. They were warm, welcoming, and kind, and they seemed to like me well enough. But then I met you and you seemed to despise me, even though I had never met you before. I didn’t understand it, but I accepted it.”
“Delaney,”
Her hand went to my mouth to stop my words. “You promised you’d let me finish,” she said, a kind smile on her face.
“It didn’t matter that you didn’t like me, because I wanted you. Almost every night, since the day I met you, I’ve dreamed about you.”
I wanted to ask so many questions about her little confession. My mind trying to grasp what she was telling me, but I let her continue.
“I know that sounds a little stalker-like, and if I could offer an explanation I would, but I can’t. The dreams, well, sometimes they were sexual, sometimes they were just us doing things together. Then I would see you in person, you would dismiss me or avoid me, and I tried to get you out of my head, but the dreams on those nights would be even more intense and intimate than the one before. It didn’t matter that you didn’t seem to like me. It was like something larger than us was pushing me towards you. I hated it because it hurt when you didn’t even see me, but these past couple of weeks, it’s been so different. You’ve been different, and it’s made me want you even more. This probably sounds ridiculous and you must think I’m crazy, but a part of me believes everything led me here, to meet you.” She took another deep breath, and I held her hand in mine, trying to keep my mouth shut until she finished.
“I’m yours. There is nobody else in this world I can imagine being with, in all the ways I want to be with you. To say I’m falling in love with you, doesn’t seem enough, but I am. Falling in love with you, I mean. It’s as though you see me, the real me, for who I am, and you accept me just that way. You don’t want me to change or pretend to be something I’m not, you just want me. So, I’m yours, if you still want to hold me tonight. I only have one request.”
“And that is?” I asked.
“This weekend, when we are away at the cabin, make love to me how only you can and consume me.”
I brought my mouth down on hers, devouring her, and I rolled, so she was underneath me. She tasted like mint and chocolate and every perfect thing I ever craved. Our kisses were desperate and needy, teeth, tongues, and lips, clashing and teasing. Reluctantly, I slowed everything down. “I want you, Delaney, but I want to hold you tonight, and make certain you know I mean everything I’m saying.”
Delaney
He wrapped his arms around me and covered us up with his comforter. “Thank you for today. It was everything I dreamed of.”
His arms tightened around my body, his hand stroking my back, making my eyes heavy with exhaustion. “You should have everything you’ve dreamed of.”
“You should too,” I whispered, running my fingers up and down his abdomen. “Did you want a future with Callie? I assume you were very serious.”
He smirked a little. “Apparently, I was more serious than she was.”
“She hurt you. I’m sorry.” I said the words to him, and they were true. Being hurt by someone who said they loved you was the worst form of betrayal, and it broke my heart. He learned it the hard way. Just as I had. “Can you tell me about it?”
“She lied to me about who she was, but honestly, looking back, it was just as much my fault as hers. I saw the warning signs, and I didn’t heed them. Part of me figured I could love her enough for the two of us, but that never works. Mike told me today she was another man’s wife. She pretended to love me while she belonged to someone else. The guy she was with, he was bad news, into drugs and some other things. I was away for the Army a lot and she made bad choices-got addicted. They died one night in a car accident years back.”
My heart hurt for him. “That’s why you needed some time to beat the punching bag in the garage.”
He nodded, tightening his arms around me again. “I’m sorry I left you this morning to cook with your arm and the guys.”
“Don’t be sorry, I hope you worked through it. It hurts feeling betrayed.”
“You say it as if you know from experience,” he said.
“I do.”
“Will you tell me? At least a little, so I can learn more about you and understand where you come from too?”
I laid my head back against his chest. The way he cradled me in his arms made me want to share things with him. “I trusted someone that I shouldn’t have once. He was unkind,” she whispered. “He broke me.”
Jake
He broke me, she’d said, and a part of me became enraged. How could any man have her as the woman in his life and do anything but treat her with care?
“Tell me what you mean when you say that.” I could feel her body tense slightly after I asked her to expand on what she’d said. Even here, in my home, in my arms, fear of this man was very real for her.
“It started off with small things like going through my phone. Then he started checking my phone records to see who I was talking to, or show up somewhere I told him I would be with friends for the evening. One day I went to a meeting uptown at a colleague’s restaurant, and he showed up outside the building to ensure I left alone. He said he was in the area and wanted to surprise me, but later that night he had been drinking and confessed he tracked my phone. Eventually, there was nobody in my life, but him. He isolated me from friends and even my family. Except for Kelly and her husband. They never liked him and always knew something was off. He didn’t want me talking to her, so we just spoke in private and rarely. Only when I could without him knowing.”
“Did he ever physically hurt you?” I knew the answer, but to have her trust me enough to say it would mean the world to me.
She nodded and looked away, hiding her eyes. I cupped her cheek in my hand and turned her to face me. “You’re safe here, you know that, right? I would never hurt you. Never,” I whispered.
Delaney’s pulse was racing, her cheeks pale as she took a deep breath, trying to gather her strength. “Yes, he hurt me and others. He was a cruel man,” she blurted. “Can we talk about something else? The last thing I want to think about when I’m with you is him.”
I placed
a kiss on her lips. “Thank you for sharing that with me, it means a lot you opened up to me. I’m yours, Delaney.”
“And I am only yours,” she whispered.
“Just rest baby, we’ll have a wonderful weekend away.”
Delaney
Mike, Josie, and Josh all held ridiculous grins on their faces, standing in the driveway of Jake’s house with their bags at their feet. “You two ready for our romantic getaway this weekend?” Josh joked.
Jake rolled his eyes and mouthed, “I’m sorry,” as I started laughing.
We all piled in Mike’s truck and tossed the bags in the back. I loved how Jake wrapped his arm around my shoulder and let me lean into him in the back cab.
“Hope you guys don’t mind hearing us loving on each other this weekend. I plan on being loud!” I exclaimed to everyone.
Josh spit the soda in his mouth all over the windshield, and Mike and Josie busted out laughing. Jake kissed my forehead and smiled down at me. “Baby, you’re killing me right now.”
I tapped his nose flirtingly and winked up at the man I adored. “Just wait until later, Mister,” I said, wiggling my eyebrows for dramatic effect.
The drive up to the cabin only took a little over an hour, and we enjoyed the majestic scenery all the way up. Alaska was the place I wanted to live and raise my family. Part of me scanned the cabin area, and my heart ached.
A family. Would I have that one day with Jake? Was I wrong to hope for that? So many things terrified me about all of this. I needed to tell him the truth about everything, but I didn’t know how to tell him all of it, and I still hadn’t heard a word from Kelly. A shiver ran down my spine and I wrapped my arms around myself as a dark feeling crept over me.
“Hey,” Jake whispered behind me. “Can I hold you for a second? I didn’t want to startle you by just wrapping my arms around your waist.”
I nodded, and his arms circled around me, bringing me back against him. “What are you so deep in thought about over here?”
