The Phone Rang in the Middle of My Shower
By: Shelton Ranasinghe
This is work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this book are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
ISBN: 9780989276337
Copyright © 2011, by Shelton Ranasinghe
2665 Devon Hill Road, Rocky River, Ohio 44116, USA
[email protected]
Buddha Impetus to Primitive Psyche
Heaven at SETI’s Door Step
Self – A Delusion?
Published in United States of America
All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any form without permission from the author.
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The Phone Rang in the Middle of My Shower
The phone started ringing in the middle of my shower.
Why does the phone always ring when I’m in the bathroom? When I was a teenager, I imagined those calls were from the girls I have dreamt of wanting to be called by. That era is long past. My guesses on the callers have been always poor. I hate the calls from telemarketers. They talk as they are more worried about my welfare than of their survival. I go crazy and my blood pressure peaks every time I hear their voices.
My smart phone wasn’t smart enough to understand what was going on in my mind. It continued torturing me with the "new ring tone" that I selected this morning. In a flash I realized that it must be from Chris, to talk about our trip to the Grand Canyon planned for the next day. I jumped out of the shower partially covered in soap and grabbed the “Smartee”.
Unbelievable! It was another blood pressure peaking moment in my day.
“Prepaid discount offer for funeral services,”… Bummer!
"Do they want to kick me out of this world? Oh! Good heavens, give me a break! I am only 32," I shouted and was swearing inside my head.
Hope I didn’t damage the phone when I threw it back to my desk.
Rushing out of the shower had shifted the inner shower curtain out of the bathtub. The scene I saw added more fuel to the fire in me. The bathroom was flooded from the still running shower I forgot to shut off. After cleaning the mess, I was back under the shower, still cursing and firing zillions of hyperactive anger spines to imaginary targets. Strangely, some of the philosophical self-help stuff that I tell others, but don’t usually practice, came to my mind. For the very first time that helped to calm me down.
A few minutes later, watching TV, I thought of calling Dan as I didn’t hear from him after the last drinking session we had with the lame excuse of planning our trip. I pressed the buttons on my phone hoping he wasn’t in the bathroom.
He answered the phone with his usual “Hello!” and “What’s up?”
“Hello! I believe we’re all set for tomorrow,” I replied.
“Of course; at what time will you pick me up?”
“Hey! I won’t be able to pick you up at 10 as you planned. I have an important meeting at 10. My boss told me about it only yesterday. So sorry,”
“Is it a must, to go?”
His changed tone had a hint of disappointment.
“Dan, you know how important brown nosing in the work place is these days, right! This is one of those. Sorry, I need to attend as I need to keep my job. Hope it will be over by 11 as the idiot who usually keeps dragging these meetings on, is on vacation. I’ll be taking all my bags with me. So I will shoot to Chris’ place straight after; pick up Chris, Aini and the kid and I should be at your place by 11.20.”
“OK. The earlier the better as I don’t want to miss my plans at Monument Valley. Getting those pictures with the sun setting is my dream, Tony.”
“Don’t worry about that. You know my driving skills; right!”
“That’s what worries me the most!”
“Hey. Trust me. Bye!”
I needed to make sure Chris and the family would be ready by 11am or so. Chris's wife Aini is a habitually late person. I excuse her because of Sara, her cute 4 year old daughter who calls me “Uncle Tony”. I hate when people are late. I rang Chris’s number as I thought they could be at home by then from work.
I knew someone picked up the phone. It’s Sara who picks up the phone usually and says “Hello” with her sweet voice. I said “Hello!” Following that I heard a loud noise. It was obvious that the noise was from the phone hitting the floor. “Give it to me Sara,” I heard Aini’s voice say. Some more tumbling noises followed.
“Hello!” answered Aini.
“Hi! Aini this is Tony. How are you? Just called to check whether you made my favorite tiramisu for tomorrow’s trip?”
“No way Tony! We decided not to make tiramisu this time because of your diabetes problem.”
“Ah!”
“I am joking Tony, I know you will get a heart attack if I don’t.”
“Thank goodness,” I was relieved.
“Just a minute, Chris is on his way.”
I heard the steps of Chris reaching to the phone after Aini asked Sara to call for dad.
“Hey my friend, what’s up? What time is the kick off tomorrow?” asked Chris.
“I have to go to work at 10am and I will be at your place around 10.30 am. Is it OK for you?” I had to give them an earlier time knowing they haven’t been punctual in the past. In the back of my mind I would be happy if they could make it even by 11am.
“Sure. Hey Tony, can you wake us up?” Chris joked to make me hyper.
“Hey, Chris, no joke; be ready by that time, OK? Dan is very keen to take his panoramic pictures at Monument Valley before sunset. He will kill us if we don’t get there before sunset. So, we need to leave by that time. OK?”
“No problem sir; Sara wants to say Hello to you.”
“Hello! Uncle Tony.”
“Hello, how are you? Did mommy tell you about the trip tomorrow? Are you excited?”
“Yes. Bye! Bye!” She hung up the phone.
I took my GPS and loaded all the stopover addresses including the first stop at the Bert Lodge in Monument Valley. My SUV had just received a long overdue vacuuming, it deserved. I took it to the nearby gas station to fill up the tank. Crossed the road from the gas station to Walgreens and bought some over-the-counter medicines, a tooth brush and some other things that I thought might be useful. As I was about to reach the cashier I saw those lovely chocolates gleaming at me. That reminded me of Sara. I added some of those into my shopping bag and a tiny fluffy doll with cute eyes for Sara. Sara has a special affection for me while Chris and Aini always treated me like a family member. Chris was my roommate in college. Chris met Aini in graduate school and I have known them for over 12 years. I helped the parents from both parties come to common ground over their marriage, mending the friction due to Aini being a Muslim and Chris being a Christian. Aini and Chris are rational thinkers; “lovey-dovey” couple well matched and well understanding each other. Dan and I have been friends from a very tender age. Dan’s parents and my parents have been very good friends and neighbors for a long time.
By the end of the day, before I opened the refrigerator for the third beer I was pretty convinced that I had packed all I wanted. I printed out the hotel confirmation e-mails as hard copies become handy at times. I took some time to go to sleep; maybe due to the excitement of the five day trip.
The next day, I made sure everything was in the SUV, before I headed to the office. I guessed the spare space in the trunk was sufficient for the others’ luggage. Dan called me around 9 am to re-emphasize the importance of leaving early.
The meeting started at 10 am but it was still going on when I looked at my watch at 11.09
am. Already late on the planned departure time of 11.05 am to Chris’s place, I excused myself and left the meeting at 11.20 am. With the half-finished latte I forgot to drink in my hand, I got into my SUV and headed to Chris’s place. When I saw cute Sara in the swing at the front of their house, still in her briefs, I was positive we were getting late further. My annoyance vanished instantly when Sara ran towards me and said “Hi! Uncle Tony, what did you bring for me?” the usual few words she mastered to say fluently when she wasn’t even two. I didn’t say anything. Cuddling her I walked towards their front entrance. One by one, she pulled out the chocolates and the fluffy doll from my pockets and like on any other day, was looking for more.
I popped open the door and saw their packed bags in the living room. “Good, they must be ready,” I thought. Sara jumped out of my hands and ran towards their bedroom. Half the chocolate was gone by then. I heard Aini asking Sara whether she thanked me for the chocolates. “Yes, I did last time,” was her cheeky answer.
“I am here, can I put your bags in the SUV,” I shouted so that they could hear from their bedroom. “Yesss!” was Chris’s answer that came from the kitchen area. I carried their three bags one at a time to the vehicle as they were damned heavy. When I came to get the 2nd bag I heard Aini commanding Sara to brush her teeth. I assumed Aini was ready. Chris came from the kitchen and he was ready. He said “Hello!” to me and walked behind me when I was carrying the 3rd bag. He realized we were late as I pointed my finger to my wristwatch. I realized there was just enough space in the trunk for Dan’s bag. It was almost 11.45 am when my phone rang. It was Dan checking on what was going on. I gave the phone to Chris as soon as I heard his voice. Chris assured him we will get going in two minutes.
As Chris hurriedly walked into the house I saw a sparrow flying into the house. Chris didn’t see it. As I went in, I saw the bird flying all over the living room. I kept the front door wide open with the help of the flower pot nearby and tried to chase the bird out. Chris joined me as he saw me running around the living room waving my hands and making various sounds. It landed on the fan. Chris turned on the fan to make it move again. The bird did a full circle and fatefully hit the fan that was turning at full speed by then. The dead bird was on the floor staining their carpet with blood. Chris was quick to carry it out by its leg and threw it behind the shrub. When Chris came back to the house he signaled me with his hand and facial expressions not to utter a word about it to Aini, as she could over react to such happenings. Chris removed the blood stain with some detergent while looking around to see whether Aini would see what he was doing. Luckily she was still busy dressing up Sara.
By the time all of us got into the vehicle it was 11.55 am.
“We are sorry Tony,” Aini said when she was getting into the SUV. She had a few small bags in her hand. I was curious to know whether she brought the tiramisu; so I had to ask the question. She said “Yes.” I thought that was a sweet answer.
Dan was on the curb with his bag when we reached his house. I was surprised to see him carrying his pet Lily. Lily is a miniature dachshund, always feisty and hyper-active. I wasn’t aware Dan was bringing Lily. I know it would be an additional headache. I wasn’t sure whether all the places we booked would accommodate pets. I stopped the SUV so that he was close to the trunk; and pressed the button on the control panel to open the trunk. Dan didn’t take even a second to throw his stuff in and he closed the trunk with a thud. Lily saw us and started wagging her tail furiously with excitement.
“Thanks very much for coming so early,” was Dan’s greeting as he hopped into the front passenger seat. My eye signal requested him to direct the complaint to the passengers in the rear seats as I didn’t want to take the blame. While giving Chris a hard look mixed with a smile, Dan passed Lily over to Sara as she adores Lily. "Thank you Uncle Dan," Sara said. Dan expected Chris to say something. But Aini replied first and said, “Sorry Dan. You will understand when you have a kid.” Chris joined Aini and said sorry.
Forgetting I wasn’t supposed to talk about it, I casually said “All this was because of the Sparrow that flew into their house.” I realized I had made an irrecoverable mistake when Chris made a “Shhh” sound. Dan and Aini both exclaimed “What?” at the same time. There was no way of hiding the incident as both of them realized there was something fishy. They insisted on knowing what happened. Chris said, “OK! A bird flew into our house just before we left and was flying all over the living room. Tony helped me chase it out. It took more time than we expected as the devil wanted to remain inside. If it was on another day I would have left it in the house. Not on a day when we’re going to be away for 5 days. That’s it. Are you happy now?”
“Do you know, a bird coming to your house is a sign of death,” said Dan.
“Is that true? Where did you read that, Dan?” Aini was concerned and Chris was silent.
“BS! Maybe a sign of death to the bird by going into a house,” I said without thinking much. Chris definitely didn’t want to hear what I said. I regretted saying that.
“Can we stop this stupid talk and talk about something good,” Chris demanded. I swore to myself to be extra careful before I open my mouth.
“We can talk about beer and Jack Daniels,” I joked as I still couldn’t keep my mouth shut.
“Not now,” said Aini, partly to calm us down.
Though Dan is an exceptionally good person in most areas, when it comes to the aspect of superstitions he is at an extreme end. Just the opposite of my thinking on paranormal and superstitious views; he believes in all the stupid garbage. Dan talks about energies, afterlife, spirits, karma, psychic abilities and many more things quite seriously as if he has had firsthand experiences on those things. I’ve always had arguments with him, sometimes ending with bad feelings. But our friendship is always rock solid. We were certain our strong bond couldn't be destroyed by silly arguments. His father was a Christian, and mother, a Buddhist. Dan is a strong Buddhist with an open mind and had a strong respect for all the other religions. The four of us have discussions of our religious viewpoints very openly. Many dinners and parties have ended with discussion on politics, religions or world affairs. We are comfortable talking about religions, though our voices on different viewpoints always gather momentum with the quantum of spirit intake; the liquid kind.
Knowing Dan will be disappointed if we are late to reach Monument Valley, most of the time my foot on the accelerator was right at the bottom. I was on the lookout for potential traffic cops, as I knew if I get caught for speeding that could cause further delay. I looked at the dial and realized I was touching 90 miles per hour; that was 25 miles over the speed limit. I slowed down to 80.
Various sounds Sara made playing with Lily drew our continual attention. Aini’s occasional bursts of yelling kept both Lily and Sara under control.
“Dan, did you check whether our lodge allows pets?” I inquired.
“Yes all under control except at one place on our return journey.”
As it was 2.30 pm we thought of having a break. We drove to a McDonalds at the next exit after a collective decision. As soon as we got out from the vehicle, Dan realized Lily was looking to relieve herself. As I had the same urge I rushed to the men’s. Aini whispered to me not to buy any chocolates for Sara. As if she had a sixth sense or whatever it was, a micro second later Sara was asking me exactly that. I ignored her persistent plea. Chris paid the bill for us. I couldn’t resist asking for a piece of tiramisu from Aini. I managed to force her to give me a piece, though she resisted a few times by saying it was meant for after dinner. I knew I was behaving like a child but thought it was well worth the effort. I took the opportunity to fill the gas tank and assured Dan that he would be able to take the photographs as planned.
We were back on the road by 2.50 pm partly because of Dan’s insistence on not wasting time.
Dan started trivia questions to have some fun. His first one was “Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was n
amed April. The second child was named May. What was the third child's name?” Aini and I said it could be June”.
“It has to be obviously Johnny,” Dan said and was thrilled as we were wrong. We were embarrassed but were determined to get the next one right.
“Fire-up, Dan,” I said.
“What word in the English language is always spelled incorrectly?” All of us couldn’t get that correctly either. Dan as a wizard said the answer is “Incorrectly.”
After a burst of laughter mixed with disappointment by the three of us, Dan asked the next question. “If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?” I got it right.
Dan continued as he was the genius of the lot. “If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?” Aini got it right by saying “One big stack.” Chris, who was the real genius in the SUV with PhDs in Physics and Math, was silent. He probably knew all the correct answers.
The fun changed after we realized traffic was slowing down. About a quarter mile away, we saw a series of blue and red lights flashing; probably due as a result of an accident. After a few minutes of moving at a crawl, we passed the place where the police cars were, and saw the bloody carcass of a moose. We assumed there were no other fatalities. Sara’s bombardment of questions kept Chris and Aini fully occupied. Once we moved past the accident spot the traffic was back to normal and thinned out pretty quickly. I was able to get back to my original speed. I paid more attention to the road signs and saw many cautioning signs for deer crossings. I wondered why I didn’t see those signs before I saw the accident.
Chris reached for his bag at the rear and managed to get it over to his lap. He pulled out a CD and gave it to Dan. Dan inserted it into the CD player. The first composition was an instrumental piece and it was really soothing. I hadn’t heard it before. All of us agreed that it was a nice CD after we heard the 4th or 5th song. Chris gave a detailed narration of the CD, but I couldn’t concentrate much on it as I was driving very cautiously on the winding stretch of road. The precipice down the hilly terrain was scary.
When Dan started groaning in a particular rhythm, I looked at him. He was fast asleep. Looking through the rear view mirror I realized Chris, Aini, Sara and Lily were fast asleep as well. Dan kept me awake with his groaning sound that doubled in intensity every 5 minutes. When the sound reached a particular peak, he woke up, looked around and went back to sleep. He kept-on repeating the rhythm every 10 minutes. Once when he woke up I looked at him to get his attention, but he ignored me completely as if I was a stranger. What a good friend! I thought to myself.
The CD came to an end. I looked back at Chris as he tapped my right shoulder. He indicated by sign language that he would take over the driving. As it was almost into the 6th hour from the start, I really didn’t mind acceding to his request. I took the next exit with resting facilities. All of us got down from the vehicle and walked into the restaurant stretching ourselves out along the way.
While I was ordering my espresso shot, Sara tapped my back asking me to buy her a chocolate by pointing to the ones at the counter. I picked one from the counter and before placing it in her little hand, I told her not to show it to her mommy. When I looked back after a minute it was already gone.
The stopover was very brief and we were back on track. Chris was cruising around 75 miles per hour as that was enough to pass the slow moving cars and trucks. Dan would have liked Chris to cruise at a higher speed, but I was happy with Chris’s choice of speed. I got a chance to play with Sara and Lily as I was in the rear window seat now. Lily who had a distinctive personality ignored me and favored Sara.
Suddenly we saw a deer crossing at the right side of the road. The huge car carrier trailer that was coming from the opposite side tooted its horn. The sound was scary, loud and disturbing. The deer turned to our side of the road; saw our SUV and ran back to the on-coming trailer. The things that happened in the next few seconds are impossible to explain. I remember Chris stomping on the brakes, the big 'Bam!’ and the trailer that we saw on the other side of the road launching our SUV into the air; past the steep precipice. I also remember the huge first leap over the cliff; the free fall of at least 75 feet with all of us strapped by the seat belts. We were completely freaked out and yelled in utter desperation. The thundering fall disintegrated the SUV into pieces. My side hit the rock first.
The Phone Rang in the Middle of My Shower Page 1
