by J J Moriarty
“The second effect?” Hyzou asked.
“The Qi enhances your ability to understand the outside world, as I just explained. It enhances you too. That is the second part of the Qi”, Abe said.
“Enhances me. How?” Hyzou asked.
“Well, for one, you can think faster. As well as that you can move faster. This means that in a fight you will feel that everything has slowed down. You are much stronger than you are without Qi, you are much more steady and balanced, you can sprint much quicker. You recover better than the ordinary man, as well as surviving on less water, less food, and less sleep. You will exhaust yourself much slower than others, you have wells of fitness that are not accessible to the ordinary man. That is why the Servants of Qi are particularly fearsome warriors”, Abe said.
“Surely there are more things a Servant can do. Is everything I heard about them a myth?” Hyzou said.
“There are. There are many things a Servant can do. To defeat the Colossus however, many would be useless, and we don’t have a lot of time as it is”, Abe said.
“Tell me about them”, Hyzou said. “Sir.”
“If you want. After many years of training, only the most talented of Servants may begin to use some of those powers the masses view as ‘sorcery’. Primary among these is the ability to force your will onto another living being. In fact, that is the test to become an Archaier in Uqing. You must be able to manipulate a small animal. Those who are most powerful in Uqing, the Archaiers, they can control a whole pack of dogs with their will alone”, Abe said.
“Can Servants force their will onto another human?” Hyzou asked.
“It is theorised that it can be done, and certainly in the stories, those very powerful Servants of old could. It has not been done in living memory”, Abe said.
“The power to control the weather? And disease? What about illusion?” Hyzou said.
“No Servant can control the weather. And though Servants can resist disease much more than an ordinary person, those stories you’ve heard of the ague being used as a weapon are false”, Abe said. “Illusion however. Yes. Illusion is a power some of the strongest Servants can practice. Although, it is very weak. Very few Servants can maintain an illusion for more than a minute. It is an immensely difficult power to master.”
“Time. Can Servants move through time?” Hyzou asked.
“It is time for me to use one of your answers, and merely say yes and no. Can a Servant use the Qi to move through time? No, they cannot wake one morning and decide they’d prefer to live in yesterday”, Abe said. “But some small actions can be reversed. I am not sure Hyzou, it is far beyond my abilities. Have you anything else to ask before we start?”
“Can Servants really speak to each other while miles apart?” Hyzou asked.
“Ah. Yes, they can. There’s a mountain plant that sends one into a dream. If a Servant takes it, he may speak to other Servants who have consumed the plant”, Abe said. “Ekstasis is its name.”
Hyzou was impressed.
“Normally, children who have powers are singled out early on, but the closest to actually experiencing Qi they have ever had was a confusing dream or two. For you, Hyzou, to have already experienced the Qi while you were awake – that is strange”, Abe said.
“Is it bad?” Hyzou asked.
“No. No. It’s good. Most pupils must spend a long time inducing their Qi to arrive. That yours has already arrived without any help bodes well. Now, I must just teach you how to summon it at will”, Abe said.
“How do I do that?”
“You must own your envy”, Abe said.
“What my what?” Hyzou said.
“Own. Your. Envy”, Abe said.
“I don’t understand”, Hyzou said.
“The Qi. It’s not natural for a human to experience it. It’s fluid, difficult to grasp. It doesn’t make sense. Only the most rigid of minds can anchor it then. Only when your self is solid, will you be able to allow the brilliance of your Qi to flourish”, Abe said.
“How do I anchor the Qi?” Hyzou asked.
“Honesty. You must own your envy”, Abe said.
“I still don’t understand”, Hyzou said.
“Imagine, one morning you awoke to meet Thanatis, the God of Death. He spoke to you, and told you the meaning of life. He told you that you relive the same life, again and again and again. That upon your death you shall be reborn and live the exact same life again. The world you’ve known will be identical, the people you meet. Your failures and accomplishments will all be the same”, Abe said.
“That’s not what happens when you die”, Hyzou said.
“I know. But it’s what I want to ask you about. Just imagine that it was the case. That everything you’ve experienced would repeat for eternity. How would you feel?” Abe said.
“I would get out of Piquea, before the invasion”, Hyzou said.
Abe shook his head.
“It won’t do. To find stability, you must know that you would change nothing. That if offered the chance to live everything again, you would repeat it in identical form.”
“Change nothing? That’s insanity!” Hyzou said.
“It’s not. It’s the answer. Not the mindless acceptance of misfortune and suffering, but the acceptance that they exist”, Abe said.
“What are you saying?” Hyzou said.
“Every man has the figure of light he imagines himself to be, and the shadow that falls from that light. That shadow is the darker parts of an individual. The path to mastering your Qi is recognising the existence of your shadow. You have anger, hatred, lust and envy. Own it. It is yours. It is you”, Abe said.
“What has that got to do with Thanatis telling me about my life repeating?” Hyzou asked.
“Because if you are willing to live your life all over again, then you know yourself. You know you have a self. You accept both the darkness and the light that makes up your existence. Only when you own your envy will you be able to harness your Qi for all it is worth”, Abe said.
“How do I do that?” Hyzou asked.
“Begin to breathe. Deeply”, Abe said.
Abe took a long breath in then breathed out again. Hyzou imitated him.
“Very good. Hyzou of Nuyin, what do you want?” Abe asked.
“Want?” Hyzou asked.
“What do you want? Tell me”, Abe said.
“To find my Qi”, Hyzou said.
“And what else do you want?” Abe said.
“To beat the Colossus”, Hyzou said.
“Good. But you seem angry. Why? What else do you want?” Abe said.
“I’m sorry sir, I’ll try and stop feeling”, Hyzou said.
“No. No don’t. That’s wrong. The path to enlightenment is through the emotions that make you be you. Let that rage up”, Abe said.
Hyzou breathed deeply.
“You’re not happy, are you? You haven’t been happy in a long time, have you?” Abe asked.
“Of course not”, Hyzou said.
“So what do you feel?” Abe asked.
“I don’t know”, Hyzou said.
“I sense rage”, Abe said.
“I don’t know”, Hyzou said.
“Do you regret killing those two slaves?” Abe asked.
“No. They deserved it”, Hyzou said.
“Why?” Abe asked.
“They used their power to hurt and dominate me. By doing so they made it ok for someone more powerful again to dominate them”, Hyzou said.
“Is that the solution then? Just become so powerful that no one can dominate you?” Abe said.
“No. Yes. I don’t know”, Hyzou said.
“How did you feel when you arrived in Lamybla?” Abe said.
“I was waiting to die”, Hyzou said. “I knew I’d die soon. Join everyone in the underworld.”
“Do you still feel that way?” Abe asked.
“Yesterday you told me I could survive, it was the first time I thought that”, Hyzou said.
; “Do you want to survive though?” Abe asked.
“I don’t know, no one really wants to die, do they?” Hyzou said.
Hyzou kept breathing deeply.
“Are you sure?” Abe asked.
“No. I mean, what’s left for me?” Hyzou said.
“To say?” Abe said.
“To live for”, Hyzou said. “Nothing to live for, no one to love.”
Abe sighed. But Hyzou felt something wash over him.
It wasn’t anger. It was something completely different. He shut his eyes to try and concentrate.
Everything came alive in orange. Hyzou opened his eyes again. Pulled himself out of his Qi.
“Hey! I did it”, Hyzou said.
“Nothing to live for, no one to love”, Abe said.
Hyzou looked at him.
“Do you feel it there, at the edge of your psyche? Like a pool you can jump into”, Abe said.
Hyzou closed his eyes and tried to concentrate.
“I do”, Hyzou said.
“Jump into it, without closing your eyes”, Abe said.
Hyzou did so, and saw the same scene laid out before him twice. Once normally, once orange. He was within his Qi - using his Qi.
“This feels strange”, Hyzou said.
Abe said something, but Hyzou couldn’t hear it.
He realised what the problem was, the Qi couldn’t understand language. Hyzou breathed deeply and tried his best to concentrate upon his Qi. He felt how the power controlled each of his senses. Concentrating, he removed it from his hearing. Allowed himself to only hear normally.
“Sorry, can you say that again?” Hyzou said.
“Can you understand me?” Abe said.
“Yes”, Hyzou said.
“I’m impressed.” Abe said.
“It’s strange”, Hyzou said.
“What does it feel like?” Abe asked.
“Like I’m caught in a rapidly flowing river”, Hyzou said. “Like I’m in a current separate to everyone else’s water. As if everyone is in a tree, and I’m the only one on the ground.”
“You just did something difficult”, Abe said.
“What’s that?” Hyzou asked.
“Removing the Qi from your hearing while keeping it shrouded over your other senses. Controlling which senses your Qi controls. Managing it in that way is difficult”, Abe said. “You deserve congratulations.”
“Congratulations?” Hyzou asked.
“Summoning the Qi on demand, and then controlling which senses it controls is one of the tests an apprentice takes to become a Servant of Qi”, Abe said. “You can call yourself a Servant now.”
“Really? Well, I just remember what you…”
Abe flung some clay at Hyzou.
Hyzou saw the hundreds of pieces of dirt flying at him, aiming straight for his open eyes. Almost as a reflex, Hyzou bowed, tilted his head forward slightly, and all the clay collided with his forehead.
“Hey!” Hyzou said.
Abe ignored that.
The old Servant just threw a punch, all his weight behind it too. Hyzou barely had enough time to react. He flinched and pulled his face out of the way. Abe’s ring skimmed along Hyzou’s eyebrow, and Hyzou felt the blood explode out and down his face.
“Hey! Stop that!” Hyzou said.
But this time Hyzou was ready for Abe’s response. Another punch came, and Hyzou ducked beneath it. Seeing everything move a lot slower, Hyzou looked at Abe with the Qi alone. He saw Abe’s torso, well protected by bones at some points, defenceless at others. Hyzou breathed deeply, then landed his blows.
He punched Abe in the stomach, twice. Hyzou rolled on the ground and extended his punch with another blow, this time to Abe’s side. Abe dropped his fists, began coughing. Hyzou drove one last punch, this one to Abe’s throat, and he forced Abe to the ground.
“What was that?” Hyzou shouted, blinking the blood out of his right eye.
“Congratulations, Hyzou”, Abe said.
“Congratulations?” Hyzou asked. “For what?”
“You just beat the shit out of me”, Abe said.
“Oh”, Hyzou said. “What?”
Hyzou loosened his grip on Abe and let the old man up.
“That’ll be the last of your combat training for some while now. You must learn to control your Qi properly. But yes. Good start. Good start”, Abe said. “Now just let’s take a brief break, I think I definitely need a drink after that.”
CHAPTER 12
The bat with whom he shared his room had returned. It was fast asleep, hanging by the hole it escaped out of every night.
Hyzou had shaved his cheeks and scalp bald. He had washed away the filth of yesterday’s training. His clothes, washed the night before, had dried and were put on. All this done, he was ready to train. All this done, he stepped outside.
In the garden Abe was waiting for him. The place had changed since yesterday. Eight large wooden stakes protruded from the ground. They were thick, and twice as tall as Hyzou.
Abe smiled when he saw Hyzou.
“Are you prepared for your first day of combat training?” Abe asked.
“Really? I thought you’d just given up on the idea”, Hyzou said.
“You’ve only been two weeks learning. Summoning the Qi can take a pupil years to learn. Impatience won’t help you”, Abe said.
“Sorry”, Hyzou said.
“Now, we must find your Qi once again”, Abe said.
“What will I do after that?” Hyzou asked.
“Sit”, Abe said.
Hyzou sat. Hyzou placed his heels on the clay, his hands on the ground by his side. He began to slow his breathing, everything slowed along with it too. He closed his eyes.
“Feel the air fill your feet, fill your hands, fill your head. Feel it leave after that”, Abe said. “Don’t allow your mind to wander, but if it does, return it to your breathing, to your now.”
Air filled Hyzou, then it left, then it came again, then it left.
“You must own your envy”, Abe said.
Breathe in, breathe out.
“Who are you?” Abe asked.
“Hyzou of Nuyin, son of Mak”, Hyzou said.
“What are you?” Abe said.
“A slave”, Hyzou said.
“Do you wish you were free?” Abe said.
“Yes”, Hyzou said.
Hyzou felt a sting at the side of his face. Abe had slapped him.
“Own your envy! Today, do you wish you were free?” Abe said.
“No”, Hyzou said.
“What do you want then?” Abe said.
“To survive”, Hyzou said.
“To survive the Colossus?” Abe asked.
“To survive everything”, Hyzou said.
“Good. Honesty is the path to greatness. Is survival the only thing you want?” Abe asked.
“Yes”, Hyzou said.
Abe slapped him again, harder this time.
“Lies! Own your envy! What do you want?” Abe asked.
“To die”, Hyzou said.
“Good. Very good. Why? Why do you want to die?” Abe said.
Everything around Hyzou was slowing.
“I’m still here”, Hyzou said.
“So what?” Abe said.
“Everything else is gone. This is the broken encore of a life that doesn’t exist anymore”, Hyzou said.
“Do you feel it Hyzou?” Abe asked.
“I feel it”, Hyzou whispered.
Everything was now wholly slowed. Though Hyzou could see, it wasn’t with sight, though he could hear, it wasn’t through his ears. He breathed deeply and watched as grains of clay ascended into the air around him. Abe seemed not to have noticed them.
“Good. Now stand”, Abe said.
Hyzou stood.
“It’s remarkable how quickly you can summon your Qi”, Abe said.
“Thank you, Abe.”
“Can you maintain it?” Abe asked.
Hyzou stayed still.
Abe slapped at him, but Hyzou saw them coming towards him. He flinched from the path of both hands.
“Do you even realise that your eyes are closed?” Abe asked.
“No”, Hyzou said.
“Then open them”, Abe said.
Hyzou did so.
“Do you even notice that they’re open?”
“No”, Hyzou said.
“Ok Hyzou. Get up onto one of the stakes”, Abe said.
Hyzou faced the nearest one. A rope was tied around it, taught against the wood. Placing his feet and hands against each of the rope’s greaves, Hyzou climbed up the pole.
“No! Come back down.” Abe said.
Hyzou fell back down to the clay.
“Climbing isn’t the quickest way. Jump up there”, Abe said.
“Jump? It must be fifteen feet in height”, Hyzou said.
“It is, and you’re going to jump onto it”, Abe said.
“I am? How?” Hyzou said.
“Well normally jumping involves pushing with one’s legs and going into the air. Have you never done it before?” Abe asked.
Hyzou frowned.
“Jump as you would jump over a wall, just aim for the top of the stake.”
Hyzou crouched and drove off the clay with his legs.
Hyzou crashed into the stake and fell onto the ground.
“Did you see that?” Hyzou asked.
“I did”, Abe said.
“I.. I jumped at least ten feet into the air”, Hyzou said.
“I just said that I saw it”, Abe said. “You didn’t jump onto the stake though.”
Hyzou crouched.
“Wait. Wait”, Abe said.
Hyzou looked at him.
“You’ve lost your Qi again”, Abe said. “Bring it back.”
Abe was right, everything had sped up to normal again. Hyzou began to breathe again.
“Own your envy. What’s your name?” Abe asked.
“Hyzou.”
Everything began to slow down again.
“Now, jump again”, Abe said.
Hyzou crouched, then leaped. He didn’t reach the top of the stake, but he measured his jump well enough so that he didn’t land in a heap on the ground. He landed upon his feet. Hyzou jumped again. He jumped again. He jumped again, and this time he nearly reached the top of the stake. He reached out a hand and grabbed onto the top. With ease, he pulled himself up onto it.
