by G. J. Irrera
Mrs. Barbara Turner both smiled, “She’s the one that got away”, Mrs. Turner said.
“Got away”, I said, “Got away from what”.
“Not from what, but from whom”, Mrs. Turner said.
“Alright”, I said, “From whom did she get away”?
“You didn’t hear this from me”, Mrs. Morgan said, “but Carl has always said that letting her get away was the biggest mistake of his life”.
“So what happened”, I asked.
“Your Uncle Carl always had a crush on Becky-Jo”, Mrs. Turner said, “I know this may be hard for you to believe, but back in college your Uncle was too shy to ask her to go out with him”.
“My Uncle Carl shy”, I said in disbelief.
“Well only where Becky-Jo was concerned”, Mrs. Turner said, “Your Uncle Carl was quite the ladies’ man back then”.
“At least up until the beginning of his junior year”, Mrs. Morgan said.
“What happened that year”, I asked.
“That’s when Becky-Jo arrived”, Mrs. Turned said, “She transferred from another college and I believe she was in two of Carl’s classes”.
“So just how did she get away”, I asked, “and why?”
“We all hung around together, you know parties, maybe going out for pizza and even a few trips to the Jersey coast”, Mrs. Turner said, “Although it was obvious to everyone that Carl really had feelings for her, he never asked her out on a date”.
“Carl finely got up the courage to ask Becky-Jo to a dance, it was right after graduation and just one week before he went into the Air Force”, Mrs. Morgan said.
“Let’s not forget the weasel”, Mrs. Turner said.
“The weasel”, I repeated.
“A little weasel by the name of Wendell Hapsboro”, Mrs. Morgan said, “Wendell was one of those spoiled rich kids, you know the type; they always have the best of everything and never had to work a day in their life to get any of it”.
“Although he never had a chance with Becky-Jo”, Mrs. Turner said, “The weasel did everything he could to keep Carl and Becky-Jo apart”.
“Carl was really looking forward to the dance”, Mrs. Turned said, “and that’s when the Weasel plaid his direst trick”.
“What did he do”, I asked.
“Wendell paid a couple of girls to deliver messages to Carl and Becky-Jo”, Mrs. Morgan said.
“Yeah the little rat had one girl tell Becky-Jo that Carl was going to be late and wanted her to meet him at the dance”, Mrs. Turner said.
“The other girl told Carl that Becky-Jo had changed her mind and decided to go home a day early”, Mrs. Morgan added.
“Carl didn’t show up at the dance, what was the point, he thought that Becky-Jo had already gone home”, Mrs. Turner said, “and Becky-Jo waited for Carl but of course he didn’t show. We found out later that since his parents lived about fifteen miles from the school he went home”.
“The following week Carl went off to the Air Force and he never heard for Becky-Jo again”, Mrs. Turner said, “Years later, it must have been in the late seventies, Joe was talking to Jeff Swanson a guy who went to college with us and of course they started reminiscing about their college days. Jeff asked Joe if Carl and Becky-Jo ever got the mix up straightened out. Joe asked what mix up he was talking about. Jeff told him the whole story and Joe told Carl what really happened that night”.
“What a creep”, I said.
“Creep wasn’t anywhere close to what Carl called Wendell”, Mrs. Turner said. “Joe said that it was a good thing that Wendell wasn’t anywhere near Carl that night; he was pretty sure Carl would have ripped Wendell’s head off”.
“So what happened”, I asked.
“Well as I said Carl went off to the Air Force and after flight school he was stationed in Guam for a couple of years during the Vietnam War”, Mrs. Turner said “and then he was off to Germany for another couple of years. As for Becky-Jo not long after college she got married and moved to Florida; about ten years later she divorced and never re-married, she is now the ex-Mrs. Roberts”.
“So Mr. Hapsboro did all that just to be with Mrs. Roberts”, I asked.
“Of course not”, Mrs. Turner said, “He did it because he’s a jerk”.
“The only reason Wendell was interested in Becky-Jo was because he knew Carl was interested in her”, Mrs. Morgan said, “Wendell’s family would never have let him marry her she didn’t come from the right part of town”.
“So her messed up two lives for what”, I asked?
“Because he’s Wendell Hapsboro, the third”, Mrs. Turner said, “and because he could”.
At the official reunion, there was a sheet of plywood painted with the school’s colors and covered with pictures of the graduating class, so after the reunion Uncle Carl took the board home to display at the cookout, he hung it on the wall of the garage.
Uncle Carl and Becky-Jo went over to the garage to look at all the old photos of the Class of 1969.
They had a good laugh over the clothes and hairstyles. Uncle Carl found a photo of Becky-Jo standing next to Wendell Hapsboro the Home Coming King and Queen.
“You know that old Wendell rigged the Home Coming King and Queen election”, Uncle Carl said, “I’m not sure if he did it to be with you are just to prove he could”.
“Whatever feelings he may have had, or thought he had for me, I assure you they were not mutual”, Mrs. Roberts said, “I spent most of the evening trying to avoid him”.
Uncle Carl couldn’t take his eyes off Mrs. Roberts, “You are just as beautiful as I remembered you”, He said.
“Carl Phillips”, Becky-Jo said, “either your memory or your eye sight is failing you after all these years”.
“I will admit that my eyesight isn’t what it used to be but my memory is just fine”, Uncle Carl said.
“And what do you remember about Wendell Hapsboro”, Mrs. Roberts asked.
“Old Wendell Hapsboro”, Uncle Carl said, “What can you say, all skin and bones and wearing those thick horn rimmed glasses. What I remembered most about Wendell, aside from the fact that he had everything that no one else could even dream of affording”, Uncle Carl said, “and that he had a crush on you was that he was one of, if not the biggest liar in the whole state of Pennsylvania”.
Now the ‘biggest liar in the whole state of Pennsylvania’ might be a bit of an exaggeration but it was obvious that Uncle Carl did not think much of Mr. Hapsboro.
“I don’t know if you remember Jeff Swanson”, Uncle Carl said, “but he told Joe Turner that Wendell paid a couple of girls to deliver messages to each of us to make sure we wouldn’t be together at that dance and so that he would have a chance to be with you”.
“I know”, Mrs. Roberts said, “I ran into Jeff and his wife, well actually Jeff and his third wife and he told me all about it. Of course he had no idea where you were, so there was no way for me to get in touch with you”.
Uncle Carl and Becky-Jo were looking at the photos posted on the garage wall, “Whatever that little spark was that Carl and Becky-Jo had back in collage”, Mrs. Morgan told Mrs. Thompson. I think it just reignited”.
“I doubt that it ever went out”, Mrs. Thompson said.
Now I’m no expert when it comes to love but even I could tell there was more than old college friendship between Uncle Carl and Mrs. Roberts.
I think that just about everyone in the backyard was watching Uncle Carl and Becky-Jo; when who walked in but Wendell Morris Hapsboro the Third.
Bob Thompson tapped Joe Turner on the shoulder, “Well there goes the neighborhood”, he said, pointing in Mr. Hapsboro’s direction.
“Yep”, Joe replied, “the Class just went out of the Class Reunion”.
“This ought to be good”, Sam Morgan said, “Carl has been waiting for forty years to give it to old Wendell Morris Hapsboro”.
“That’s Wendell Morris Hapsboro the third”, Mr. Turned said.
“Is there going to be a fight”, I ask
ed?
“Heck no”, Sam Morgan said, “Even on a bad day Carl could take out old Wendell with one punch, the best way to take old Wendell down a peg or two is a war of words and wit; and your Uncle Carl is one of the best”.
“There was a time or two when we were back in college”, Joe Turner said, “Your Uncle Carl would get old Wendell so mad that he would be sputtering and stuttering so bad he could hardly talk”.
“A time or two”, Bob Thompson chimed in, “more like every day”.
“Obviously Uncle Carl and Mr. Hapsboro didn’t like each other”, I said.
“Didn’t like each other”, Matt Hawkins said, “Why compared to those two, World War Two was a Sunday picnic”.
“Well I don’t think Carl should take advantage of old Wendell”, Bob Thompson said making it sound as if he were truly sympathetic, “After all in a war of wits, Wendell is unarmed”.
“Do you really think Uncle Carl still holds a grudge after all these years”, I asked.
“Did you ever hear that old saying that an elephant never forgets”, Mr. Hawkins said.
“Of course”, I said.
“Well Carl Phillips reminds that old elephant of stuff that he can’t remember”, Mr. Hawkins said.
“Especially where old Wendell Hapsboro is concerned”, Mr. Thompson added.
Even though no one really cared what the rich kid had been up to all these years, he was more than happy to fill them in on all of his accomplishments anyway.
“I sorry I missed the official reunion”, Mr. Hapsboro said, “but I had to close a little business deal. It needed my personal attention; it was only worth a couple million dollars but every little bit
