by Noelle Adams
“Well, you were asleep. I’d hardly expect you to have minty-fresh breath when you were sleeping.”
He opened his eyes and turned his face toward her. He desperately needed to shave. “Very reasonable of you.”
“I’m a very reasonable person, you know.”
His eyes were warm, although his mouth wasn’t smiling. “Are you?”
“Yes. You should know that by now.”
“I do know that.” He groaned and stretched, distracting her momentarily with the way the beautifully defined muscles of his arms rippled. “Damn. Last night was a workout.”
“It was.” She blushed a bit as she remembered their carnal activities during the night. She’d been eager and uninhibited and really quite shameless, urging him on and bouncing on top of him and begging him to take her harder. She wasn’t normally quite so unrestrained in bed, so she wasn’t sure where it had come from.
“So if the tooth brushing was in the hopes of a repeat performance this morning, I’m afraid I might have to disappoint you.” He gave her a wry twist of a smile. “I’m honestly not sure if I can get it up right now.”
She giggled helplessly. “Just as well, because I’m pretty sore. Your dick is going to have to keep its distance for the time being.”
He laughed at that and rolled out of bed, wincing as he straightened up. “Damn. I feel like an old man. What the hell?”
“You’re limping like an old man,” she told him as he made his way to the bathroom.
His wordless grumble of response didn’t disappoint her.
When he came out of the bathroom, she thought he might return to his own room since morning sex wasn’t an option, but he didn’t. He climbed back under the covers with her and did another long, leisurely stretch.
“Maybe you just need more practice with sex,” she told him. “If two rounds is too much for you.”
“Practice?” He gave her his narrow-eyed look. “Should I repeat some of what you were screaming out last night? That might give us a sense of whether I need more practice or not.”
She scowled. “I wasn’t screaming. I’m not a screamer.”
“No, you’re not,” he admitted, reaching over to stroke her hair back from her face. “But you were pretty damn vocal last night. You seemed to like what I was doing to you a lot.”
“I did. So thank you for your efforts, even if they left you a broken man this morning.”
He couldn’t hold on to his feigned indignation. He laughed openly, still playing with her hair. After a minute, he said in a different tone. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.” Her heartbeat had accelerated, although she had no idea what he was about to ask.
He wasn’t quite meeting her eyes, so he appeared to be self-conscious about the question. “Why won’t you let me go down on you?”
The words weren’t anything she might have expected. She stared at him for several tense seconds, trying to process what he was asking and how she was supposed to respond. “I... I never said you couldn’t.”
“I know. But every time I try, you shift gears and start doing something else. At first I thought it was just a coincidence, but it happens every time. It can’t be a coincidence.” His eyes held her with that soft earnestness that was Carter at his kindest. “Is there some reason you don’t want me to?”
“No. No.” Her cheeks were burning, and she knew he could see it. She hated that she couldn’t control her reaction. “I mean, it’s just not something... I don’t normally...”
Carter was quiet for a minute, like he was thinking. “I’m not pressuring. I promise. I’d never do that. If it’s really something you don’t enjoy or find unsexy or it brings up bad memories or something, then I’ll never mention it again. But if you’re just nervous...” His big hand cupped her cheek. “Ruth, you can trust me.”
She gulped. “I know I can, Carter. Thank you. I don’t know why I... It just makes me feel vulnerable for some reason, and I don’t do vulnerable well.”
He nodded, making it clear that he’d already sensed that was the reason for her reluctance.
She wished she’d been better at hiding it from him. Trying to shift the tone of the conversation, she said in a teasing voice, “But I’m more than happy to go down on you if you’re interested in that kind of thing.”
His body jerked very slightly. She only saw it because she was watching for it. But his voice was disapproving when he said, “I didn’t bring this up as a sneaky way of getting a blow job from you.”
“I know that. I know you’d never do that. I’m just saying it’s on the table for me. Going down on other people.” She pulled back the covers, baring his mostly naked body. He was wearing nothing but gray boxer briefs.
“Didn’t I just tell you that I’m worn out and not sure I could get it up?”
“You did tell me that.” She gave a taunting smile and leaned over to kiss his belly, letting her lips trail down slowly.
She checked his groin and was thrilled to see that he was starting to harden. She met his wry gaze across the length of his upper body.
“You think that proves something?” he asked, a little breathless.
“Well, it proves that you can in fact get it up this morning.” She straightened up, checking his expression again. In a more serious tone, she added, “If you don’t want to, that’s totally fine. Just say the word, and I’ll stop teasing you. But if you’re interested, I’m definitely up for that.”
He lifted his head from the pillow to scan her face. “Are you sure? This isn’t just a way to deflect from a conversation that makes you uncomfortable, is it? Because I wouldn’t want it like that.”
He could read her far too well. She searched her feelings to make sure she wasn’t doing exactly what he was afraid of, finally concluding that she wasn’t. She was already getting excited about the idea of pleasing Carter this way. “It’s not that,” she told him truthfully. “I really do enjoy it. And I kind of want to now, if you’re good with it.”
“The only way I’d say no is if I thought you didn’t really want it. If you do...”
“I do.”
He relaxed back onto the pillow. “Then let’s see what you’ve got.”
She did her best for him. She kissed his belly some more, teasing him by getting close but not close enough until he was fully erect in his underwear. Then she pulled them off and caressed him, checking his face to see what he liked the best. When she finally took him in her mouth, he was so tense he was shaking with it. He’d tangled his fingers in her hair and held on to a fistful of it. Not pulling. Just holding it back from her face.
When she started to bob her head, he groaned shamelessly and began to rock his hips.
Thrilled with his reaction, she kept sucking him off. She tried to use creative technique, but she got too excited about what she could sense in his body. How good she was making him feel. He was grunting now and clearly fighting to control his hips so he wouldn’t overwhelm her.
She appreciated the restraint. Carter was kind in this as he was in everything else.
When he was close, she squeezed his balls and sucked hard. He came with a loud, helpless bellow.
Fortunately, since he’d come more than once during the night, he didn’t release very much semen, so she didn’t have to deal with that. She gave him a few last sucks as he softened, then kissed her way back up his body.
He’d let go of all the tension in his body. He was fully relaxed, his eyes closed and his breath coming out in sated little moans.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so proud of herself. She’d made him look and sound like that.
He tried several times to speak before he could get coherent words out. “Thank you,” he finally rasped. “That was... Thank you so much.”
She kissed his neck and cuddled close to him when he wrapped an arm around her. “You’re welcome. I liked it too.”
“I more than liked it. I’d say my mind is totally blown.”
/> “Your mind?”
He chuckled tiredly and nuzzled her hair. “Among other things.”
Both their bodies shook with soft amusement as he hugged her to him more tightly. But she could feel him softening again beside her. His breathing was slowing down.
“Are you going to go to sleep now?” she asked.
“Maybe. Do you mind? Do you want me to do you? I don’t have to go down on you. I could do something else to take care of you.”
“No, I’m good. I don’t really feel like doing anything else. I’m pretty happy.”
“Are you?” He sounded like he was on the verge of drifting off. “Are you happy?”
“Yes,” she whispered, telling him nothing but the truth. “I am.”
He gave her a sleepy kiss on the temple. “Good. Me too.”
He was sound asleep in less than a minute.
She loved it so much. That she’d been able to take care of him in that intimate way. That she’d given him that kind of release. That now he was so content and replete that he fell right back to sleep.
The emotion filling her chest wasn’t sexual pleasure. It wasn’t even pride at doing a good job and giving him a good time.
It was something deeper. Softer.
Tenderness.
Like Carter was hers to take care of.
She knew he wasn’t. She knew he was just her fake fiancé until Christmas was over. But right now it didn’t feel that way.
It felt like he was hers for real.
THAT EVENING, THEY went to a big Christmas party at the house of a couple who were friends of Carter.
It was a huge event with almost a hundred people in attendance. The house was another of the mansions on the lake, so there was plenty of room for all the guests in the expansive living room and big patio by the pool. The food was delicious, and the mood was festive. Ruth actually had a good time meeting people and looking at the decorations and singing Christmas songs with a group that gathered near the piano at the end of the evening.
She was squeezed next to Carter in a big chair. He was smiling and easygoing, obviously having a good time too. After several songs, the piano player, a woman in her thirties who could play skillfully by ear, started vamping “All I Want For Christmas Is You.”
Soon dozens of people were urging Carter to get up and sing it, but he resisted. He was laughing but kept saying no, until he finally declared, “I only sing that song for Ruth.”
Something about the way he said it made Ruth’s heart gallop, although she knew he must simply be playing a part.
That excuse was evidently enough to convince his friends, but they just switched gears, urging him to sing a different song. Finally he relented and got up to sing “Let It Snow.” He didn’t go all out the way he did when he was singing with Ruth, and he didn’t do any dancing. But he did a really good job with the song, and everyone ended up clapping and singing along.
Ruth was proud of him. He was smiling and sheepish as he came back to join her in the chair. He kissed her, and it wasn’t just a light peck on the mouth. It was a real kiss, and she couldn’t help but respond to it.
When they pulled apart, they had an audience. Ruth blushed hot red, although it was obvious no one thought anything unusual about them kissing that way.
After all, they were supposed to be engaged.
The party finally wound down just before midnight. When she and Carter got into his car to go home, she said, “That was pretty fun.”
“Seriously?” He gave her a sidelong look.
“Yes.” She blinked in confusion, putting a gift bag she’d received at parting on her lap. “Didn’t you think so?”
“Yeah. Of course I did. I’m just making sure you had a good time too.”
“I did. I don’t like everyone there. Some of those people are pretty snotty. But I like a lot of them. It was good to see Lincoln and Summer.”
“Yeah. It was. I had a good time.”
Satisfied that he meant it, Ruth dug into the gift bag, oohing and aahing about all the goodies she pulled out. Everyone at the party got a bag, and it was filled with gourmet candy, expensive samples, gift cards to local restaurants and shops, and a beautiful, tiny crystal Christmas tree.
“It must have cost of fortune to put these bags together! Look at this. Two kinds of shower gel. A girly one and a manly one. I know for a fact that these cost a lot since they come from that shop downtown. How much money did the Crofts spend on these bags?”
“Probably not as much as you think. They bought those little Christmas trees, so it was an investment. But a lot of the other stuff was probably given to them by the local businesses.”
“What? Why?”
“Because it helps the businesses too, to get a lot of people liking their stuff. People who will go on to spend a lot of money.”
Ruth shook her head as she peered down into the bag. “Rich people really do live in a different world, don’t they?”
Carter was quiet for a minute. “Yeah. I guess so.”
“That wasn’t an insult,” she said, glancing up at him quickly. “I’m just saying. In my world, stores don’t give you free bottles of shower gel for a hundred guests. And gift cards! This is something else. It’s like living in a different world.”
He was driving now, but he shot her a searching look. “I guess it is kind of shallow and entitled. So you don’t like it?”
“The world? I don’t know. I mean, I like you. And your mom. And I like Lincoln and Summer. And Lance and Savannah. And a few of the others I met. But people are different if they get everything handed to them like that. It’s just a different world.”
Carter nodded. He didn’t respond with words, but he seemed to be thinking.
The conversation made Ruth think of something she’d been meaning to ask. “Why is Lincoln still working as a bartender?”
“What?” Carter obviously wasn’t following the shift in topic.
“Lincoln. He’s still working as a bartender. I know he started doing that when he was young because your dad cut him off or whatever. But he’s married to Summer now, and she’s got a fortune, doesn’t she? So Lincoln must not need the money from his job, but he’s still working as a bartender. Does he really like it that much?”
“I don’t know. I think he does enjoy it in his way. But I think it’s more that he doesn’t want to sit around and live off his wife’s money. You can understand that, can’t you?”
“Yes. I definitely can. So he’s going to keep doing it? He doesn’t want to be involved in the family business or anything?”
“He does. At least to a certain extent. He’s been helping me out with some stuff in the past year. Strategic planning. And he’s really good with people. He’s such a good schmoozer. Better than me.”
“I bet you’re a pretty good schmoozer too.” She reached over to give his sleeve a tug.
He smiled. “I’m okay. But he’s better. And he does feel a connection to the business. It’s his family too. But he doesn’t have any training in business. He’s trying to finish college now. He’s got another year or so to go. I think he’ll probably keep the bartending job until then. After that, he might want a job with Wilson Hotels.”
“And you’ll give him one?”
“Of course I will. We’ve had our problems. A lot of problems. Both of us have messed up pretty bad in the past. But we’re doing well now. He was really good after my father died. He could have cut me out of the business entirely. He could have been ruthless. Legally, he could have done it since Dad left the whole thing to him. But he didn’t. If he wants to come on board, there will definitely be a place for him. Like I said, he’s better with people than I am. And he wouldn’t want to deal with all the tedious stuff that I’m good at, so I think we could work it out without too much conflict.”
“That’s good.” She adjusted her position, putting the gift bag onto the floor of the car. “I’m glad you guys are getting along now. It must have been hard to be on the outs with you
r family. I’ve never had a sibling like that. I have Kayla of course, but that’s different. It would be a shame if you couldn’t be close to him.”
“It was. For a lot of years, we weren’t close at all, and I hated it.” Carter gave her a twisted smile. “It was like there was a hole in my heart. For a while it felt like I had nothing but holes. In some ways, I lost Summer earlier this year when she got together with Lincoln. I didn’t lose her completely, but she’d been my best friend my whole life, and she... she isn’t anymore. That was a hole too.”
The ache in her chest compelled Ruth to reach over and put a comforting hand on his thigh.
He didn’t pull away from it. Continued, “But I have Lincoln now. I still have Summer in a different way, and I also have Lincoln. I think I ended up better off in the end.”
The spark of hope that ignited at his words was like nothing Ruth had ever experienced before. “Really? You mean it?”
“Yeah.” He’d stopped at a traffic light, and he turned his head to meet and hold her gaze. “I do. I never thought I’d say this, but I’m happier now than I was before everything happened. I was trying to go down that road set out for me, and I kind of broke when I couldn’t do it, but I realize now it wasn’t the road I wanted. I did lose something, but I gained a lot more. I’m better off right now than I was last Christmas.”
She gave him a wobbly smile, unable to get any words out. And it didn’t matter. It felt like they’d said enough.
They drove the rest of the way back to the house in silence.
A WEEK LATER, RUTH was showing Kayla pictures on her phone of the two projects she’d recently completed. One was a master bedroom and bathroom, and the other was a connected living room and dining room. Kayla oohed and aahed over the photos, and Ruth had to admit they looked pretty good.
She’d done a good job designing those rooms. She was proud of them.
“They’re both gorgeous,” Kayla said, when she’d looked at every picture at least three times. “I can’t believe you can make rooms so beautiful. Were the people happy with them?”
“Yes. I think so. They both gave me huge tips, which I hadn’t expected. And they gave me a lot of compliments and said they’d recommend me to their friends. So I think they were really happy with them. People like that tend to let you know if they aren’t, so I think I’d have heard about it if they didn’t get what they wanted.”
