Buster clearly recognized Linc’s voice because he scrambled down off Meredith’s lap and raced over to him, where he crouched with his furry butt wiggling in the air while his front paws tap-danced in excitement.
“Hmm, well, now that’s interesting,” Isabella murmured with sly suggestion in her voice, before joining her husband and baby. “What are you guys doing back? You’ve only been gone just over an hour?”
Meredith watched as Ethan hooked an arm around Isabella’s shoulder and dropped a kiss on her lips. “Yeah, sorry, Marnie was fussing badly and is feeling a little warm. I think another tooth might be coming through. I brought her home so she didn’t get too upset and affect the guys there. If she’s getting a fever, it’s probably not a good idea she’s around others.”
He looked like he was going to pass the baby to Isabella when she held up her hand. “I’ve been patting the dog. Take Marnie to her room. I’ll go wash my hands and meet you there.”
The couple was so focused on each other they seemed to have forgotten that Meredith and Linc were in the room.
Meredith looked up as they left and her gaze connected with Linc’s. “Umm, hi.”
“Hi yourself. How are you? You doing okay?” He sat on the couch next to her, bringing Buster with him.
“Fine. What about yourself?”
Could they sound more like polite strangers?
Hard to believe just over a week ago they were dancing and laughing together.
Fortunately, Buster didn’t have any issues and he managed to wiggle his way out of Linc’s hold and settle on the couch between them, his head resting on Linc’s thigh.
“Well, Buster looks happy. He’s settled into your place okay?”
Meredith placed her hand on his back and the dog rolled over, exposing his belly for a scratch.
“He has. There’ve been no issues at all. I thought he might be anxious that first night, but once he worked out that I wasn’t going to kick him off the bed, he settled against the spare pillows and fell asleep.”
“You know you’ve broken the cardinal rule of pet ownership, don’t you?”
“I have? What’s the rule?”
“You’re not supposed to let dogs sleep on your bed, but I’m glad he’s settled in and I don’t think I’d have kicked him off either.” Linc reached out and placed his hand on hers. Heat shot through her and she pulled away.
“How come you’re here? Did you meet up with Ethan at the veterans’ center?” she asked, uncomfortable with how much his words pleased her, along with his light touch.
“It wasn’t planned. I was playing cards with my granddad. I was surprised when Ethan walked in. He was looking a little stressed about Marnie’s fussing, so I said I’d follow him to make sure he got home okay. How about you? Did you drop over to visit with Marnie?”
“No. Iz and I had made plans the other day to catch up. I wanted to introduce her to Buster. I also wanted to talk to her about…”
Linc didn’t need to know exactly what she wanted to talk to Isabella about. It was none of his business.
“I guess Ethan and I came home before you had a chance to tell her about, you know, your plans.”
Of course he would bring it up. Why couldn’t he forget he ever saw that brochure?
“No, we didn’t have much chance to talk about anything before you and Ethan came home. But, seeing as you followed Ethan, you can leave now and then I can talk with Isabella.”
Linc reared back as if she’d slapped him. Oh, boy, that sounded so rude and uncalled for. He hadn’t said anything but the truth.
“Look, I’m sorry,” she started. “I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way. Or told you to leave. It’s not my place.”
Linc stood and moved to the other side of the room. Buster tracked his movement and then turned his gaze on to her, an accusatory look on the puppy’s face. “Meredith, I’m not your enemy here. I’d like to be your friend.”
Meredith squeaked, then closed her mouth because what was she supposed to say to that?
Before she could think of anything, Ethan and Isabella walked back into the room, sans baby. Excellent timing. Another minute and she would’ve forgotten her resolve to keep her distance and begged Linc to hold her again. His quiet strength appealed to her more than she should let it. Linc had already proven to be a good friend when he gave her Buster.
“Is Marnie okay?” Meredith asked.
“Yep, I’ve given her some baby Tylenol and rubbed some gel on her gums. She was falling asleep as we walked out.”
“How about you show me what you’ve done in the backyard, Ethan?” Linc piped up.
Meredith bit her lip to avoid laughing out loud at the comical look of confusion on Ethan’s face.
“The yard?” Ethan asked.
“Yeah,” Linc said as he directed Ethan out of the room. Before he disappeared from view, he looked over his shoulder and winked at Meredith.
She’d had an idea why he’d had asked Ethan to give him a tour of a backyard. Meredith knew full well Ethan hadn’t had anything done to it recently, but the wink confirmed it—he was giving her and Isabella some private time. No doubt when he got outside, he’d explain it all to Ethan.
“What was that all about?” Isabella asked.
A flush of heat filled her face. No way could she hide the telltale blush from Isabella. “Linc worked out that he and Ethan intruded on our girl time, so he came up with an excuse to leave us alone.”
“Why would he think we needed some time? I mean, I know that’s why Ethan left with Marnie in the first place, but for Linc to know that as well—what aren’t you telling me?”
Despite her earlier caution, Meredith’s brain now was advising her to tell Isabella everything. She needed her best friend, and this was too big an issue to keep hidden from her.
“You really need to be seated for this,” Meredith said.
Isabella plopped herself down on the couch and Meredith followed. Taking a deep breath and cuddling Buster close when he, once again, jumped on her lap, she began. “Your rehearsal dinner wasn’t the first time I’d met Linc. I met him in a bar in San Diego on my layover from Guatemala. We spent the evening together.”
“Oh, my God, you didn’t, did you?” Isabella gasped.
“Yes, I did. Well…we did.”
“No wonder you didn’t seem too upset about the Mark fiasco. You went and had yourself some fun. Good for you.”
“It wasn’t like that. When I went to the bar I didn’t set out to have a one-night stand as some big eff you to Mark. It just happened.”
“But wait, you asked me if Linc had a brother named Luke. Did he give you a false name?”
“No, I misheard him. He figured because it was one night and we wouldn’t see each other again, there was no point in correcting my error.”
“I guess that’s why you had no problems going off with him when you got sick.”
Now came the next part of her confession. “Yeah, about that. I wasn’t technically sick. Something else was going on with me.”
Isabella grabbed her hands and scooched closer. “What’s wrong, Mere? Is everything okay? Are you okay?”
As if her body knew what she was going to say next, her stomach twisted and she sucked in a deep breath. For half a heartbeat, she wished Linc were by her side. “I-I had, um, I had an ectopic pregnancy.”
“Oh, my God! What? Two days before my wedding? I don’t understand. Why weren’t you still in the hospital? Why didn’t you tell me?” Pain filled her friend’s eyes and Meredith was hit with another dose of guilt.
“Iz, you were about to get married. You had Marnie to look after. Besides Linc was with me and there’s nothing you could’ve done. I was lucky in some respects.”
“Lucky? How on earth were you lucky? Ectopic pregnancies are dangerous, aren’t they?”
“They can be. Fortunately, for me, it was early enough in the pregnancy that my fallopian tube didn’t burst and all I needed was an injection of medicatio
n, which basically stopped the cells from regenerating and the embryo getting bigger. My body absorbed the cells and that was it, pregnancy over and done with. I swear I wasn’t in any pain on your wedding day. It was like it never happened.”
But, God, even now her stomach clenched with phantom pains. She surprised herself with how calm and in control she sounded.
“Oh, Mere.” Isabella wrapped her up in her embrace, and Meredith became aware of the tears rolling down her cheeks. Okay, so not as in control as she thought she was.
“I’m so sorry,” Isabella continued. “I should’ve been there for you. You should’ve called me. I don’t care that I was about to get married. You needed me.”
The last thing Meredith wanted was for her best friend to feel any sort of guilt when she had no need to. She had enough of her own to deal with. “As I said, I wasn’t alone, Iz. I had Linc and he was a tower of strength. Please don’t feel bad. There’s also something else I need to tell you.”
Isabella sat back. If they were a cartoon, Isabella would be drawn with eyes three times bigger than normal. “What else is there to tell me? You’re getting married? You’re going away again?”
Blurting out that she was going to get married would be easier than explaining she was going to go down the road of single parenthood. The problem was, she’d become very adept at pushing down her loneliness and presenting a confident, happy woman to the world. No one could ever tell how much Meredith had been hurting. And recently she’d wanted more. Wanted to be loved for herself and the person she was.
“I’m going to have a baby.”
If possible, Isabella’s eyes widened even further. “Wait? What? I think you need to back up a little bit. I’ve only been married not quite two weeks. How can you get pregnant so quickly after experiencing a miscarriage? And is the father the same person you got pregnant with before?”
For a teacher who usually had a talent for explaining things clearly, Meredith was botching this up majorly. Isabella, surprisingly, hadn’t connected her one-night stand with Linc and her first pregnancy.
“I’m not pregnant right now. But once my body has healed and I’ve been given the all-clear by my GP, I’m going to look at getting pregnant.”
Isabella sat back on the couch with her brows in a little V. Meredith could tell her mind was turning things over and over and it wouldn’t be long before she figured out Meredith’s intentions.
“Hang on, you threw out all this information in the hope I’ll fixate on the last thing you said so I miss something important.”
That hadn’t been her conscious plan, but maybe unconsciously she’d been hoping that Iz would gloss over her and Linc’s connection, as well as Linc being with her the night she lost the baby.
“First, you tell me that you and Linc hooked up in San Diego.” Isabella held up a finger. “Second, the night of the rehearsal dinner you had a miscarriage. And, finally, you tell me you’re going to have a baby, but you’re not pregnant. Is that everything?” Isabella was holding up three fingers.
No point denying it. “Yes.”
“Okay, now let me read between the lines.” Suddenly, Isabella’s eyes lit up as if she’d won the lottery. “No way. It couldn’t be, but it makes perfect sense—Linc was the father of the baby you lost, wasn’t he?”
“Yes. It wasn’t planned. We used a condom, for goodness sake. I wasn’t irresponsible; it just happened.”
Isabella’s warm hand closed over her cold one. “Trust me, I know. I’m not judging. I’m just blown away by it all. What are the odds of my best friend and Ethan’s good buddy hooking up without either one knowing the connection between us all?”
“You could say I was shocked when I saw him in the church. Even more shocked a few hours later when the doctor told me I was pregnant. It wasn’t how I planned for everything to happen.”
“From that, I’m guessing you’re going to try again with Linc?”
“No, Linc’s not going to be involved. I plan to get pregnant via a donor. I’m going to do this on my own and my own way.”
“What? Why would you do that? Why not wait until you fall in love and get married? I mean, it doesn’t have to be Linc, but it’s better when you share it with someone you love.”
Meredith pulled her hand away from Isabella and got up and paced over to the mantle, keeping her gaze firmly away from the wedding picture. Iz said she wasn’t judging her decisions, but she was.
A paw batting at her leg switched her focus from inward to her little dog. She picked Buster up and he snuggled into her neck, giving her comfort.
She breathed out and some of the tension released from her. She faced her friend again, keeping her dog close.
“I made the decision on the way home from Guatemala that I wanted a baby. I’m not jealous of you having Marnie, if that’s why you think I’m doing this. You may believe my reasoning is selfish, but I’m not going to change my mind. When I lived with my aunt, her daughters always came first. And it seems I became an afterthought to Mark—the man who told me he wanted a future with me. I’ve been alone most of my life. I want a child.”
Isabella’s brow furrowed and her lips turned down. “Oh, Mere, I’m sorry. But I just don’t think this is a good idea. You can’t use a baby to fill a hole inside of you. It doesn’t work that way.”
Intellectually, Meredith understood the points Isabella was making. Emotionally, she wanted to rail at her friend. Iz had everything. What would she know? But that would be so inaccurate, because Isabella had experienced a major tragedy when her first husband had died. Only Ethan’s determination and patience had given her a happy ending.
“Iz, I hear you. I really do, but I’m going to go through with this even if you don’t agree with me.” She had hoped to have her best friend’s support, but she could go through this alone if she had to. “In the last month, it struck me that I was more upset about the possibility of not having a family than I was about Mark and his betrayal. If we’d gotten married, it would’ve been so wrong. I see that now.”
“I’m glad you feel that way, but still, Mere. This is such a huge decision. Maybe you should take a little more time to think about it.”
Meredith smiled sadly. “It’s all I’ve been thinking about. This is what I’m going to do.”
Isabella studied her, her brow furrowed, no doubt trying to think of the correct words to say. Meredith wasn’t sure she wanted to hear them.
“What about Linc? What does he have to say about this?”
“Why would Linc have any say in what I do with my life?”
“Because he also lost a baby that night, Mere. He lost his child as much as you did. Have you asked him how he’s feeling about it? Have you two even discussed the child you lost?”
Guilt slammed her in the middle of her chest. Oh, God, how could she have been so insensitive? Not once had she considered what Linc might have been going through. All she’d thought about was herself. Hadn’t he always asked her how she was feeling? He’d given her a dog. He hadn’t passed judgment when he’d seen the sperm donor pamphlet. What he’d done was volunteer himself.
If anything, Linc had been a silent support system she hadn’t even known she needed. And not once had she thought to offer him support. To ask if he needed to talk about what they went through that night in the emergency room. The news had been as much of a shock to him as it was to her.
“Linc gave me Buster and he volunteered to be a sperm donor.”
Isabella’s hand went to her throat. “He gave you Buster and said he’d be your sperm donor? I think I need another drink. How much more is there to this story? What exactly is going on between the two of you?”
Good question, and one Meredith didn’t want to examine too closely because she might find she wanted more than he could give.
Chapter Ten
“Holy shit, dude,” Ethan said scrubbing a hand down his face. “That’s a lot to take in. I’m really sorry about the baby. That’s tough, man.” He clapped Lin
c on the shoulder.
Linc nodded. “Thanks, but I didn’t go through anything. Meredith went through it all. She was in so much pain that night. She was incredibly strong. My part simply entailed me sitting by the bed and trying to support her the best I could, considering everything that had happened between us.”
“And you went through it all silently,” Ethan commented. “You have to be hurting as well.”
Linc closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. Over the last couple of weeks, he’d tried not to think about the thwarted pregnancy with Meredith. How could he mourn a life he’d only known about for a couple of hours? A life he had no idea existed or he even wanted. A life he hadn’t planned on, but now couldn’t help but wonder if the baby had been a boy or a girl. Would the baby have looked like him or Meredith?
Wondering about outcomes he had no control over wasn’t healthy. Being in the military, he was all too familiar with how the what-if scenarios could mess with a person’s head.
“Yeah, it was difficult, but maybe it was for the best, you know.”
“How’s that?”
“Well, it was a one-night stand and she thought my name was Luke. I didn’t bother to correct her because I didn’t think I’d see her again. How many one-night stands lead to a happy ever after? There’s also a lot of different ways this could’ve turned out. I mean, if it weren’t for your wedding, I wouldn’t have even known about Meredith or the baby. It’s only because it was ectopic and Meredith was in a lot of pain that she even found out she was pregnant. It could’ve been another two months before it became evident our night together had produced a baby. If the job in San Diego had worked out, I’d have been fuck-knows-where and she wouldn’t have been able to contact me about it at all. That is, if she even wanted to.”
Ethan held up his hand. “But all those things didn’t happen. What happened was you found out and you lost a child. Regardless of the circumstances of its conception, that baby was part of you. It’s got to hurt, and Meredith is right there in my house.” Ethan paused and raised his eyebrow. “Instead of looking at it as a closure, how about looking at it as a second chance? Maybe the matchmaker is about to meet his match?”
The Matchmaker’s Match Page 9
