It never occurred to me that he would even think about my future in this way.
“I’m not saying you should jump into it, but you should think about it, Mia. Joe could go to a day care for a couple of afternoons a week and interact with some kids his own age, and I could help you out whenever you needed me to.”
“You’ve thought a lot about this.” I giggle nervously.
He holds up his hands and makes a small gap between his thumb and forefinger. “Just a little bit.”
The idea may have only just been put into my head, but the more I think about it, the more I want to make it work.
I’ve not done a lot of anything for myself since Troy died – other than say yes to whatever this is with Luke – but this is something I should consider, not only for me, but for Joe too. For our future.
I’m suddenly overcome with the feeling of wanting to kiss Luke. I don’t want to be sitting across from him in this fancy restaurant any longer – no matter how delicious the food was, I’m ready to go and be closer to him.
“You want to get out of here?” he asks, as though he can read my mind yet again.
“I sure do.”
“Come take a walk with me, Mia,” he says as he gets to his feet and offers me his hand. It’s more than a walk he’s offering, I can sense that, but that only makes it more appealing.
I reach out and take his hand in mine with absolutely no reservations whatsoever.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Luke
I smile at Mia’s wide eyes in the dim light of the park.
We’ve been strolling hand in hand around this lake for what feels like forever, neither of us in a rush to be anywhere else.
This isn’t like any date I’ve ever been on – this feels more like a married couple getting a rare night off from their kids than it does a first date.
I think I actually like the sound of that even more.
I thought I already knew everything about Mia, but I was wrong. Sure, I knew most of the important stuff, but we’ve been out here sharing every little, insignificant detail, and I’ve learnt so much already.
She wanted a huge family before, but now she’s not so sure.
She’s never swum in the ocean because she’s terrified of sharks.
She snuck into a movie without paying when she was fifteen and she still feels guilty about it.
She’d really love to get a dog.
This is just a handful of the new information I’ve been privileged enough to receive, because that’s what learning about her is, it’s a privilege that not many people are privy to.
I sling my arm over her narrow shoulders and kiss the top of her head.
She’s wearing a pair of heels tonight, which makes a rare change from her Converse, so I don’t have as far to lean down to reach her. https://amzn.to/2XAL6TV
She’s incredibly petite and fragile looking, and I worry that even the weight of my arm might be too heavy for her small frame.
“Have you decided what you want to do about Joe? I don’t want him getting upset or confused if he sees us kissing.”
It’s been playing on my mind a lot lately – how to approach him with this new relationship.
Mia laughs, surprising me. “Don’t worry about Joe.”
“I always worry about Joe.” I chuckle.
She stops walking and turns to face me, her arms winding around my middle.
“He’s two, Luke, and he adores you. It’s not like you’re some new guy on the scene that he doesn’t know. You’ve been there with him since he was born – let’s just let him watch things evolve naturally and if he’s got questions when he’s older then I guess I’ll worry about that then.”
“We’ll worry about that then,” I correct her. “I’m not going anywhere, Mia, you have to stop talking about us like we’re temporary. I’ll be there for these conversations. I’ll be there for everything.”
There’s only the light of the moon and the dull glow of the park lights, but I can still tell she’s blushing.
We haven’t exactly discussed what we are, or put a name on it, but I can tell it’s time. Mia obviously needs the reassurance.
“I don’t think we’re temporary.” She shakes her head gently. “But I guess I’m not sure that I believe anything is permanent anymore either.”
“I am,” I murmur as I run my hand slowly up and down her arm. “I’m permanent. You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” She sighs.
“You’re mine now, Mia. I’m yours. We’re together. So whatever that means to you – it’s yours. You want to call me your boyfriend, partner, sex slave… whatever…” I grin. “I’m down for it. I don’t care what you call me as long as it translates to being yours too.”
“Good,” she replies quietly as she reaches for my neck and wraps her hands around.
She’s so unbelievably beautiful when she looks up at me with her big green eyes. I’m so far gone on this woman I can’t find my way back – I don’t want to either. I’ve never been so happy to be lost.
I lower my head and kiss her with everything I have – showing her how much she means to me with every brush of my lips and flick of my tongue.
She makes a sweet, breathy sound as I pull away.
I know she’s no stranger to the fact that I love her, but it feels like I’ve never really had ‘that moment’… that moment where I get to say those words to her and she really feels them.
Right now is that moment.
“Mia?”
I don’t know why I prompt her, she’s looking right at me.
“Mmm?” she murmurs.
“I love you.”
She smiles shyly, and I can tell how much she likes the sound of those words.
“I love you too, Luke.”
Now I’m the one smiling, and I’m not afraid to show it. I could listen to those words on repeat for days and still never grow tired of hearing them.
“Take me home,” she whispers.
***
Mia’s been to my place before, but she’s looking at everything as though she’s seeing it for the first time.
She’s looked at every photograph and read the spine of every book.
She’s nervous.
So am I.
We haven’t discussed sex at all, but I think we both feel that it’s brewing between us.
I can’t take my eyes off her and that dress she’s wearing isn’t helping the situation in the slightest.
Neither of us has said a word for a full ten minutes. I’m standing here, watching every tiny move she makes like she’s the most fascinating creature I’ve ever come across.
She looks back at me over her shoulder and smiles, and just like that, I can’t stand the space between us a minute longer.
I cross the room and wrap my arms around her – her back is pressed against my front.
I kiss her shoulder, and she tilts her head to give me better access to her exposed skin.
I trail kisses up and down her neck, smiling as my stubble has her shuddering and giggling.
Her hand winds its way into my hair and her fingers pull gently at the strands.
Every sense I have is on high alert, and they’re all tuned into her.
She’s got me completely sucked in.
Her scent, the feel of her body, the sound of her moans, the taste of her and the sight of her bare skin are all I’m aware of.
“I’ve never seen your bedroom,” she whispers suggestively.
She hasn’t. It’s a situation I need to remedy immediately.
I run my hand slowly down her shoulder to her wrist and take her hand in mine. I lead her from the living area and down the hall with only one destination in mind.
I push the door open to my bedroom and step back out of the way so she can enter.
I’m expecting her to take total stock of everything in here, like she did the living room, but she doesn’t. She takes two steps inside and turns back around
to face me. She’s barely looked at the room – in fact she’s not looking at anything other than me.
I step towards her and she slides her hands under my jacket, helping me to shrug it off.
I watch her fingers make short work of each of the buttons on my shirt until it’s hanging open in the front. She tugs the hem loose from my pants and runs her hands over the groves of my chest and abdomen.
I finish the job for her and my shirt drops to the floor in the same way my jacket did.
I run my finger over her collarbone and over the thin strap of her dress, pulling it with me as I go.
I repeat the action on the other side and lean my head down to kiss her soft, creamy, skin.
Her grip tightens on my waist as I reach around her to lower the zip on the back of her dress.
“I hope you don’t mind what you see,” she whispers as I finish unzipping her.
She’s looking into my eyes with so much worry and concern it hurts me.
“My body isn’t what it used to be… Since having Joe…” Her voice trails off.
That’s when it occurs to me that she’s never shown herself to anyone as she is now. Not even Troy has seen her body since she grew a human inside of it, and maybe it makes me a bit of an asshole, but I’m glad we get this – this little piece of untouched is only ours.
“Your body is beautiful.”
“You haven’t seen my stretch marks…” she whispers.
She’s wrong, I have seen the small, faded lines on her stomach. She can’t reach the top cupboard in the kitchen without her shirt riding up, but I’m not about to admit that I’ve been perving on her when she’s not looking.
“I don’t care about your stretch marks, Mia. You grew a baby to get those marks – they only make you more beautiful in my eyes.”
“But what if you don’t find me attractive… in that way?”
“That’s never going to happen.”
“You don’t—”
“Why don’t I just show you,” I interrupt her by sliding the straps of her dress even further down, tugging the fabric from her body as I go until she’s standing before me in nothing but her underwear.
“I think you should know, I don’t go past second base on the first date,” she whispers with a coy smile as I undress her.
“Lucky this isn’t really a first date then, huh?” I growl. “Because those eyes of yours are begging me to make a home run.”
She grins at me and looks down at my body, so I do the same, laying eyes on her for the first time.
Nothing, and I mean nothing, could have prepared me for the sight in front of me, and it’s got nothing at all to do with stretch marks, and everything to do with how sexy she is.
This is by no means the first time I’ve seen a woman in her underwear, but I haven’t had much in the way of girlfriends over the years, and I’ve certainly never had feelings for any of them the way I do for Mia.
Even if she wasn’t drop dead gorgeous, it wouldn’t matter, because I’m in love with this woman, and I’d still want her more than anything else.
“Excuse my language,” I growl at her, “but you are fucking stunning.”
She giggles and blushes. “I think I can handle a curse word or two.”
“And I can handle a stretch mark or two.”
She rolls her eyes and grins. “Alright, touché, Mr. smooth. Enough of that talk.”
“I think I’m about done talking altogether,” I breathe as my lips brush against hers.
“I think that’s a smart choice,” she whispers, a slight tremble in her voice.
I take a deliberate step away from her and slowly unbutton my pants and lower the fly.
She watches with eyes full of heat and desire as I let them fall to the floor and step out of them.
All I’m wearing now is a black pair of boxer briefs… and my socks.
I chuckle as I look down and she follows my gaze before giggling too.
I toe off my socks and then we’re just standing there, each of us taking our fill of the other.
I want to close the gap between us and rip the underwear from her body, but I won’t.
Mia deserves to be adored and cherished, and I’m the man for the job.
I want to take my time with her so I don’t forget a single detail. One thing I’ve learnt is that life is short, but there are some things that deserve a long, long moment of that life.
This is one of those things.
Mia is one of those things.
I’m here, ready and willing to give her as many of my moments as she wants to take.
I’m so caught up staring and thinking, that it’s her who takes the first step.
She presses her warm, bare skin against mine and I hear a sigh of satisfaction. I’m not even sure if it came from me or her.
“Don’t break me, Luke,” she whispers as I reach behind her and undo the clasp of her bra.
“Never,” I whisper back as her thumbs hook into my boxers and slide them down my thighs.
I sweep her hair from her shoulder, so it falls loosely down her back.
My fingers drag down her spine from her neck to the sway of her lower back and she arches into me.
I can feel the rapid thrum of her heartbeat against my chest and it makes me smile – mine is doing the exact same against hers.
My fingers toy with the band of her thin underwear before shoving them down over her ass and thighs.
She wiggles free of them and immediately I’ve got her in my arms without conscious thought. My wrist protests a little, but I ignore it. Mia’s worth a little pain.
Her legs wrap tightly around me, and my hands grip her ass.
I already knew this was permanent between us, but as I lower her down onto my bed and sink deep inside her, it feels yet another step up from permanent… if that’s even possible.
It feels eternal.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Mia
The grey knit jumper Luke gave me to put on falls down near my knees, like a big oversized dress.
It’s heavy and a little scratchy against my skin, but it’s warm and it smells like him, so I might never take it off.
He is downstairs getting food.
I might not have dated in a long time, but it seems that part hasn’t changed. Sex still makes men hungry.
I grin to myself as I hear him clattering around in the kitchen.
That was some seriously incredible sex. The intensity inside that man is something I’ve never encountered before. He sees me – really sees me, and he doesn’t shy away from showing himself to me either.
I loved Troy with everything I had, and our sex life was nothing to turn your nose up at, but I never connected with him on that level.
If Troy took me to the top floor of the building, then Luke just made love to me on the freaking roof.
I shake my head as my mind relives every touch of his fingers and brush of his lips.
I revel in the fact that surprisingly I don’t feel an ounce of guilt. A touch of sadness perhaps, but no guilt.
What just happened felt so right it couldn’t possibly be wrong.
Everything with Luke feels right, and I can’t argue with that. I don’t want to.
Luke appears in the doorway then, his hand gripping a chicken leg that he’s gnawing on.
He holds it out to me, offering me a bite.
I shake my head and giggle. “That’s okay. You have it.”
He grins at me like that was the answer he was hoping to get.
I turn back around and continue my exploration of his bedroom.
You can tell a lot about a man by his bedroom and I want to know everything about Luke.
I wander over to the dresser in the corner of the room. I can see a few framed photographs, and I’m dying to know who is important enough to him to hold pride of place.
The first one I see is of Luke and Emily at her graduation. He’s wearing his full military uniform and he looks so handsome and proud of his sis
ter.
My eyes linger on it a moment before moving to the next.
My heart swells in my chest at the sight of the three-image frame. They’re all of Luke and Joe.
There’s one photo from when Joe was a little baby. I think I might have even been the one to take it. Luke is asleep in the recliner chair, with Joe sleeping on his chest.
The next is when Joe was about one and Luke took him to a car museum. Joe is grinning with excitement and pointing to one of the shiny vehicles.
The last was taken only a month or two ago. Joe is on Luke’s shoulders, his arms out wide like an aeroplane. He’s not gripping onto Luke’s shoulders like you see most kids doing – it’s like he has complete trust that Luke would never drop him.
I took that photo too, in my back yard, and I’ve seen the very same picture tucked in Luke’s wallet.
Seeing the three images here together, it hits me again just how good Luke has been to Joe and me over the years.
He’s always been there. Every single step of the way.
Joe might not have had his biological father there, but he’s had one hell of a surrogate one.
I can feel tears welling in my eyes, ones of pure happiness, and I’m about to turn around and thank Luke for being exactly who he is, when the last photo on the dresser catches my eye.
It’s me.
Not only me, but Luke and Troy too.
I reach slowly for the frame, as though it might disappear into thin air in front of me.
I’ve never seen this photo. I can’t even place where it was taken.
I can feel Luke watching me from across the room as I stand there, holding the frame in my hands, staring at it.
“That was taken the weekend before Troy and I got deployed for the first time. You remember we went to that bar and got rolling drunk?”
I do remember now that he’s reminded me. Flashes of it anyway… I was the most drunk of the three of us unfortunately.
I strain my memory to try and go back to this point in time, but I can’t place the exact moment this picture was taken.
I’m in the middle of the three of us, Troy is on one side and Luke is on the other. My arms are slung over both of their shoulders and I’m lifted clean in the air – they’re both so much taller than me, even as teenagers.
Mr. March: A Friends to Lovers Romance (Calendar Boys Book 3) Page 12
