by Simon Archer
“You know you are an important and valuable member of this team, right?” I met his eyes. “This plan, even with the Pixie Dust, has like a twelve percent chance of succeeding.” I pointed right at him with one of the containers. “But with your skills cast on them, it jumps up to over eighty percent. No one but you can do that.” I touched my chest. “So, yeah. Don’t feel down.” I smirked. “And besides, I saw what you distributed your points too, and I’m pretty sure you’re going for a Corpse Explosion build.” That’s when I gave him a wry grin. “I have a feeling that the next time we enter a world to do some good old fashioned fisticuffs, you’ll be up to your elbows in bodies.”
“Of course.” He made an exploding gesture with his hands. “There’s nothing quite like slaying enemies from afar and then blowing their corpses up to kill their fellows.” He threw his head back and laughed. “It is a skill that Necromancers have not had since the days of old, but I assure you, it will be glorious.”
“Gobta, I believe you,” I said as I held out my hand for a high five. “So, don’t doubt yourself.”
“I will do my best, my liege.” He slapped my hand. “It is true enough that we all have our roles.”
“That we do,” I said as I turned my attention back to the minimap. “Now let’s go seed a planet with life.”
15
We had just finished seeding the last of the spots with bacteria and enhancing their growth with Gobta’s abilities when I got the message I’d been expecting as well as another one I’d wondered if we’d receive.
The first was obvious. Letting us know we had completed Melanie’s quest, which was obvious because we had. The reward wasn’t much. Just a few stat points and a skill point, but it was enough since we’d been going to do that, anyway. However, after I read the next message, I decided to add my points to Fortitude because, well...
A mirror to a new world has opened up. Would you like to investigate?
I did, but before that, there was one more quest I wanted to make sure we finished before we left the system and headed to the new world, so I messaged Queenie over the godly tether.
“Queenie, how much longer until you finish the system’s geological survey?”
“Not long, master,” she replied instantly. “We’re on the last planet now.” There was a brief pause. “Maybe another hour?”
“Perfect,” I said and turned to Gobta. “Seems we have an hour to kill. Wanna spar a bit? I remember you and Queenie were messing around in the Danger Room back in the Hall of Research. I’d kind of like to see it for myself.”
“You wish to spar with me, my liege?” The Hobgoblin gave me a concerned look. “You do not even have a real weapon.”
“I have this,” I said as I pulled out the Sword of the Destroyer King. “It will be fine.”
“That sword is rusty and broken.” He pulled out Burningdeath and Sparkle. “These are much higher quality, and I worry that your sword will be destroyed.”
“It will be fine,” I said as I wrapped the sword in a protective layer of Aura. “I just wanna try it out a bit since I haven’t used it against a worthy foe.” I grinned at him. “You seem like you’re definitely worth fighting a few times.”
“Very well, my liege, but do not hold it against me when you lose.” Gobta shrugged. “Let us go to the Danger Room.”
“Great,” I said, honestly excited. I really hadn’t gotten to fight the Hobgoblin King in battle. The last time we’d fought, I’d one-shot him with the power of an entire town behind me. Now, though, it would be different, and I couldn’t help feeling giddy about it.
“I find myself excited, as well.” Gobta laughed. “I’ll admit, I wonder what a fair fight between us would be like.”
“The feeling is mutual,” I said before teleporting us to the Hall of Mirrors. Then I relayed the necessary information to Queenie, and when she responded in the affirmative, I entered the Hall.
I did a quick check to make sure Queenie was still in the Ares system, and after confirming she was still there going about her business, quickly resummoned Gobta. Then the two of us headed to the Danger Room, and I’ll be the first to admit it was quite unlike what I’d expected.
I don’t know why I’d sort of pictured the room from X-Men, complete with laser beams, mechanical tentacles, and the like, but it wasn’t anything like that at all. In fact, save for a glowing blue crystal in the far corner, it was just a completely empty room made completely from what looks like white marble, which honestly, wasn’t much of a surprise because the entire hall was made of white marble.
“So, how’s it work?” I asked as I turned to look at the Hobgoblin King. “You and Queenie spent a ton of time here, and I can’t imagine it was just fighting each other in a blank room.”
“We did that a bit, but not the entire time. There are many settings.” He strode across the room toward the crystal.
As he touched his hand to the crystal, the wall in front of him lit up with holographic stages that could be selected. I thought he might ask me which one I wanted, but he didn’t, instead choosing one that mimicked a rocky plateau. The system asked him to confirm, and when he did, the entire room shifted so that it looked exactly like the place he’d selected in almost the exact same way Veronica’s technology had been used to copy the surface of Zeus.
Only this was a bit different because I could smell the distinct alpine scent of trees and outdoors in the air. I could feel the cool wind as it whipped across the plateau. Hell, as I nudged a tiny grey rock with my foot, I saw it move and then several others cascade into the spot it had occupied.
This place was real in a way even Terra Forma hadn’t been able to quite replicate.
“There are other places, and even scenarios where you can fight different opponents, if you wish,” Gobta said, and when I turned my attention to him, I found that he had dropped into a fighting stance with his blades held in an X in front of himself. “But, for our first meeting, I prefer somewhere with limited distractions.” He met my eyes. “Come when you are ready.”
“This place seems pretty cool, but I agree. I don’t want to give you any excuses for why you lost when it's over,” I said as I launched myself at him. “After all, I won the first time, and you still bitch about it.”
“That is because it was a fluke,” he replied as he easily parried my attack with Sparkle and then swung Burningdeath at me.
I sidestepped the flaming sword and kicked him in the gut, driving him back half a step. He grunted in pain but didn’t give me the opening I’d hoped for because instead of doubling over, he swung Sparkle at me. The blow was easily avoidable, but it did keep me from pressing my attack.
His second attack came a moment later. He lashed out with Burningdeath once again, and this time, I caught the blow on my sword, which was when all sorts of crazy shit happened.
First, there was a flash of blue light.
Second, there was an explosion of force that flung us both backward.
Third, despite the temperature being a balmy seventy or so degrees Fahrenheit, frost rippled out of my sword, and the rocky ground beneath my feet turned to ice.
Fourth, I got a message I’d never seen before.
The Sword of the Destroyer King has encountered a hostile element. Special ability: An Eye for an Eye has been activated. For the duration of this battle, The Sword of the Destroyer King has gained the power of Ice.
My eyes opened wide in shock. I hadn’t known the sword could even do that.
“So, you’ve been keeping secrets, have you master?” Gobta said, clearly pleased by my sword’s transformation. “That is wise, not revealing all your cards.” He launched himself at me. “But it will not save you.”
His blows came fast and furiously, and I struggled to block them. Each time our blades met, though, my weapon not only easily repelled Burningdeath, but it did it with supernatural force, which clearly caught him off guard. It had been obvious for a long time that he used Sparkle mostly for defense and Burningdeath
for offense, and for my weapon to so easily thwart him, well, it was definitely new territory for the Hobgoblin King.
That wasn’t the most interesting thing, though. Sure, I had to concentrate on the battle or else I’d be cut to ribbons, but at the same time, an idea struck me. I tapped into the frost powers granted me by my title, and as I did, I felt everything around me grow cold, but beyond that, I could actually feel the moisture in the air, and in the ground beneath my feet. Focusing on that, I drew the moisture from below the spot where Gobta stood, and a geyser of crystalline ice burst from the rock beneath his feet.
“What sorcery is this?” Gobta asked as he dove out of the way and rolled to his feet. He stared at me, mouth agape as I flicked my wrist, causing the stalagmite of ice to shatter and rain down razor-sharp icicles upon him. Not that it was much of a problem for him because he effortlessly batted them away with his swords.
“I don’t know,” I said as another wave of my hand caused frost to spread out from my feet until the entire area was covered in a thin layer of ice. “I’m mostly just using my title in combination with the sword’s power. I’m not sure how to explain it.”
“Fine, keep your secrets.” He tried to charge, only he couldn’t because his feet had frozen to the icy earth. Instead, he just wound up wobbling as he tried to tear his feet free of the ice, which only made him lose his balance and fall onto his ass.
“Well, this is certainly interesting,” I said as I strode toward him and pointed the Sword of the Destroyer King at him. Then, with a ridiculously small effort of will, I caused the frost to climb over his hands, encasing them and his swords in icy handcuffs.
“It would seem so, my liege.” Gobta stared at his frozen hands in shock. “I should never have doubted your strength. I yield.”
“I think this one is definitely more of a fluke, but I’m glad we found out about it here.” I willed the ice away, and as I did, my sword must have senses the battle was over because it returned to normal. “Thanks.” I offered him my hand, which he accepted.
“Master,” Queenie’s voice pinged over the godly tether as I got a message saying Veronica’s survey quest had been completed. “We have finished and are now heading to the Hall of Mirrors to meet you.”
“Thanks, Queenie.” I nodded to Gobta. “Ready to go kick ass in a new world?”
“Yes.” He grinned widely. “I want to fight opponents who are not as broken as you are. Then, after I have driven many before me and heard the lamentations of their women, perhaps I will be strong enough to face you in battle once again.”
“Sounds like a plan, Conan,” I said as I added the three stat points I’d gotten from Queenie’s completion of Veronica’s quest to Agility, Strength, and Fortitude.
It was a bit odd, though, because as I turned my attention back toward the sword in my hand, I couldn’t help but agree with him a little bit. About the broken thing. I’d used Legendary Weapons in Terra Forma before, and sure, they were always crazy, but even then, I wouldn’t want to fight anyone wielding a weapon like this… especially if it ever got reforged into its next level.
16
Once again, I appeared on the other side of the mirror without any companions, and as I waited for my Aura to regenerate so I could summon Gobta and Queenie, I took a quick look around.
The world on the other side of the new mirror was… fishy. I mean, that honestly because, well, it was pretty much just water. A water world, if you will. Only without Kevin Costner or any weird fish people. Yet, anyway. There was still time for the creator of this world to roll his dice and have it come up on Fish People.
As far as I could see, there was nothing but ocean stretching off in every direction. Only, the water was a bit greenish. And instead of having land, it had giant trees everywhere that extended upward out of the surf like giant monoliths.
Only, I wasn’t sure if they were actually trees because their trunks were slimy to the touch like seaweed, and their leaves were sort of the same as seaweed, and they had those weird little balls protruding from the stems like seaweed, so they were probably just giant seaweed trees.
“Melanie, are you seeing this?” I said as I used the Crystal connecting me to the Halls of Research to communicate with the buxom, blonde catgirl. And, yeah, I know no one says buxom, but I like the word, okay? I could have just said big titty catgirl, but come on, that’s so crass.
“Yeah,” her voice reverberated in my head as I pulled out the crystal and held it up, which caused her holographic image to appear above it like she was Emperor Palpatine and this was one of the good Star Wars movies. “Can you take some samples?”
“On it,” I replied as I whipped out the small sampling kit Melanie had given me before we’d left for the place and opened one of the weird-looking jars I found inside.
Actually, it wasn’t that weird, it just had various multicolored crystals embedded in it. I wasn’t sure why the device seemed so weird to me since I’d used them tons of times back in the game, but there was something about the tactile feel of it as I turned the lid and caused it to open with a whoosh and hiss of compressed air. There was nothing inside, obviously, so I quickly pulled the small crystalline scalpel out of the kit and cut off a piece off of the leaf of the sea tree I was standing on and placed it inside. Then I closed the lid, pressed on the crystals like I’d done a hundred million times in-game, and set it to sampling.
“Hmm… it says analysis will take four hours.” Melanie bit her lip in the holo. “Well, that’s not quite true. The analysis is done already, but it will take me four hours to receive the data.”
“That’s fine,” I said with a shrug as I put the kit back into my inventory. “Because it means I can take more samples and they’ll just send as they queue up, right?”
“That’s correct.” Melanie nodded then was shoved violently out of the way as Veronica’s face appeared in the holo.
“Don’t forget to do a geological survey. You still have the crystal, right?”
“I do, mom, thanks,” I said as I activated it, and then set it down to its lowest draw because I didn’t like the idea of being low on Aura on a new planet. “Are you seeing it?”
“No, but it’s not your fault. There’s still the four-hour delay.” She turned and yelled at someone off holo. “Jodie, can you fix this delay? It’s completely cat-tits.”
There must have been some discussion because when Veronica turned back toward me, she seemed annoyed.
“Let me guess, we can’t fix it because we don’t have the resources and the plans for an upgraded transmitter aren’t available?” I couldn’t help but smile as Veronica grumbled.
“Got it in one,” Jodie’s voice said as she echoed out of the device despite Veronica still being visible in the holo. “I’ll let you know when they become available for purchase.”
“Not a problem, now I’m going to get back to it. If you need me, just ping me.” When Veronica nodded her assent, I switched off the feed and put the crystal back into my inventory.
Then I summoned Queenie and Gobta. As the two of them appeared beside me, I instantly felt a lot less lonely.
“What is this place, my liege?” Gobta asked as he looked around, clearly disappointed with the scenery.
“Waterworld,” I said with a sigh as I looked around.
“Would you like me to scout the area?” Queenie asked as she fluttered her wings. “I can fly out and do a quick survey.”
“Yeah, let’s go with that.” I nodded as I looked down at the water a few hundred feet below. I wasn’t sure what lived down in those depths, but I had a feeling that it wasn’t going to be friendly. “Let me know if you find anything.”
“I’ll be back soon, master.” Queenie gave me a quick peck on the cheek before turning her attention to Gobta. “Keep him safe until I return, Hobgoblin.”
“Of course.” He snorted. “If he dies first, I die forever. If I die first and he lives, he returns me to life. That’s not a hard choice.”
“W
ow, such loyalty. Much inspired.” I laughed, but the Hobgoblin King did not seem to find it funny.
“You joke, but I do not.” He touched his chest. “For I have seen what awaits beyond the veil, have communed with the true gods of death, and felt the gnashing of their teeth and the heat of their insatiable hunger to consume.” He shivered. “Anything I can do to keep from meeting them again would be too little.”
“Well, that’s dreary,” I said with a sigh as Queenie leapt into the air, her ant wings beating the air so quickly they were a blur of iridescent color. “But I wouldn’t worry too much about them.”
“Why is that?” Gobta asked, and I could tell he was genuinely interested in what I had to say.
“For one, I am a God.” I shrugged. “Maybe not on this particular world, but in general. So, I should, barring a horrible accident, getting stabbed with mistletoe, or getting nailed to a cross, I should live forever.” I pointed at him. “Which means you’ll live forever.”
“That thought pleases me.” He gave me a strange look then. “If I could spend an eternity serving you, it would be too little time, my liege.”
“Aww, you always know just what to say,” I felt my cheeks heat up at the compliment, but I forged ahead anyway. “And for two, I plan on killing the gods of death and taking their power for myself.” I smiled. “It was an optional quest line in Terra Forma, and I’ve done it a few times, which means we should be able to do it here. After all, the Heart of Death necklace dropped by the Morrigan basically doubles your Aura, so I’ll have to get it at the very least.” I shrugged again. “Who is your god of death, anyway?”
“He has no name…” Gobta said slowly as though he couldn’t believe what I’d said about killing the death gods. “He is simply the visage of unmaking, and all who see him are said to be cast into madness.” Gobta shook his head. “It is said that even the great beasts that all gods fear dare not anger him.”
