“Um, I thought you had left, Erika. Last night, as a matter of fact.” Jesse chuckled awkwardly and looked between Kerry and Erika. Wait, was he actually giving her a signal for some kind of help?
Kerry frowned, scrunching up her nose at him. Pretty-faced, horny bastard. She suddenly felt sorry for Erika, with her weighted-down toes.
Erika gave Kerry a sharp glare as if Kerry was about to steal her candy. Hmm. Maybe she didn’t feel that sorry for her. Kerry cleared her throat. “Jesse, the recycling. You don’t want to miss the trashman.”
Erika’s look went through Kerry, then all the way to the back of her skull. Damn. She was rough. But Kerry would not flinch. She stared back.
Jesse coughed. “Yeah, um, Erika, let me take this out. I’ve got to get to work.”
Erika turned to Jesse and put on a little pout. “I thought this was your shop.”
His brows went skyward. “It is, and I have to work,” he said, heading for the door. This time she got the hint and followed, gliding gracefully, though Kerry could see the toll the night and the height of her sandals had had on her feet.
At the door, Erika, though not acknowledging Kerry, made a show of doing just that by expressing herself loudly enough for her to hear. “Well, I had a great time. I’m glad I could be here for you when you needed me, baby.” She smiled at him. And though the “baby” was kind of nauseating, Kerry noticed her smile looked bright and genuine, making her quite pretty in the process.
Kerry turned away, not wanting to watch the two of them anymore—or, who knew, maybe not able to. Why watch anyway? Jesse’s grief fucks were his business and his alone. The woman was right; Kerry was definitely a third wheel in this party for two.
“Let me walk you out,” she heard Jesse say, finding his voice along with his legs.
A real prince. So now he was all manners. The tan knight and the used-to-be man of her dreams, and there he was walking out his last night’s stand while she was cleaning his kitchen like a broke-down Cinderella.
She was an idiot. But an idiot who still hadn’t had her coffee. Kerry was just about to flip the switch on the pot when she heard the door chime and the sound of Noah’s voice. She turned to greet him, but when she saw Jesse coming in behind his brother, she stopped short.
“So was that Erika Taylor leaving the shop this early in the morning?” Noah asked in a loud and ribbing voice.
Jesse looked from his brother to Kerry and then shrugged, putting his hands in his sweatpants pockets. It was a gesture Kerry had seen him make countless times when he was trying to get his story straight in his mind before blurting it out to Mama Joy. “Yeah, she was, she, um, was here to, uh, give her, um, condolences.”
“Condolences, huh?” Noah said. “Lucky you. She definitely looked condolence ready in that little black dress. I swear I don’t know how you do it. You get condolences that look like that and all I get is pound cake and countless prayer hands on the ’gram.”
“What y’all talking about?” Lucas asked as he entered the shop.
“Jesse getting condoled all night long by Erika Taylor.”
Lucas cocked his head to the side, looking pensive for a moment, before he grinned. He then let out a long breath. “I’m sure there are worse ways to grieve.”
“You’re telling me,” Noah said, then gave his brother’s hand a solemn tap.
Kerry growled, and all turned her way as if finally remembering she was there. “Oh, hey, Kerry,” Lucas said, his smile turning from devilish to sweet at the drop of a dime. “I didn’t see you there.”
Kerry nodded. “Yeah, I’m guessing not.”
He pulled a sheepish face and she rolled her eyes.
Though she would probably admonish the hell out of them for the subject of the convo, seeing the three of them together and laughing in the shop like this so early in the morning would make Mama Joy happy. More than anything their late mother was the happiest when she had “her boys,” as she called the strapping men, all together under her roof. Kerry understood that. She remembered conversations—short, passing mumblings, really—when she was sitting and knitting with Mama Joy or during Mama Joy’s talks with the Old Knitting Gang about how much she feared for each of them out in the world. Mama Joy wasn’t much of a sharer when it came to her own fears and worries, and the only thing that got her tongue loosened was when her needles were flying. But Kerry got it. Whether biological or not, they were “her boys,” her children, and she loved them fiercely. She talked about her dreams for them and how much she feared that by their just being who they were, men of color in this world, those dreams could be stopped short in the blink of an eye.
For that, Kerry was grateful for this moment of laughter, but still, she’d had her fill of talk of Jesse getting condoled by heavy-toed, long-legged Erika Taylor to take care of her for the rest of the day and then some. “Are you all staying for coffee?” Kerry asked. “If so, I’ll put more on.”
Both Noah and Lucas shook their heads.
“Sorry, Ker, I have rehearsal,” Noah said. “It’s getting close to crunch time. I just came to pick up a few of my things. But I’ll be back later. There are still a couple of weeks before the tour starts, and I’ll give you all as much time as I can up until then.”
Kerry noticed the thickness in Noah’s voice and walked over to him, taking him in a hug. Not knowing if she’d gone too far, she pulled back and looked up into his expressive brown eyes. She knew instantly she was fine. “Don’t be like that, Noah. I know you’re feeling some kind of way about going on tour right now, but it’s going to be great. Sure, the timing sucks, but we’ll hold down the fort.” She clamped down and looked at Jesse and Lucas, then back at Noah. “I mean your brothers will.”
Noah blinked at her, then looked around, his eyes roaming the shop and landing on the spot where Mama Joy usually sat. He was smiling softly when he looked back at her. His deep-set eyes were shining. “I know you all will,” he said. “But I also know when I come back, nothing will be the same.”
“No, it won’t be,” Lucas said. “Though she won’t be here, we still will. Waiting for you.”
“Yeah, we’ll do whatever it takes to make sure our home and our business are still secure,” Jesse added.
“So in the meantime you gotta go out and dance your pop locking ass off and show the world what you’ve got. You’ve worked hard for this moment, bro,” Lucas said, giving his younger brother a look that said there was no other option but to go out and do his thing.
“Don’t worry, you’ve got this, and we’ve got you,” Jesse said.
Noah nodded and blinked away unshed tears while Kerry tried hard to hold on to her composure. She couldn’t take it when they were like this. She didn’t know if she liked it better when they were at each other’s throats. Sometimes that side of them just felt easier than this loving, bonding side. This side was enough to make a woman melt into a puddle of goo on the shop floor just to have them trample right on through.
Kerry cleared her throat. “Seriously, why are we acting like this is goodbye right now? You’ll be back later to help us get ready for the opening,” she said. “Go rehearse, then get back here to work some more when you can. We’ll cry over you leaving when the time comes. For now, there is work to do.”
Noah’s smile this time was much closer to his real one. “Yes, ma’am, Kerry Girl.”
“Good. That’s all I want to hear.”
The coffee done, Kerry was surprised when she came out of the kitchen to find Jesse alone with no Lucas or Noah in sight.
“Where did Lucas go?” she asked. “I thought he was staying for a while.”
Jesse turned from where he was standing by the door and looked at her. His smile was soft and endearing, and for a moment she was taken back to early days and soft squishy dreams of him and hopes of some sort of butterfly future. But then he looked away. He shuffled his fe
et, and as he started to speak, he couldn’t quite meet her gaze, and all Kerry felt was ominous despair. “He went upstairs to grab something. Listen, Kerry, about Erika earlier, it wasn’t like you might’ve thought.”
Kerry frowned. Why did he have to go and bring up Ms. Sparkle Toes again? “Um, excuse me, Mr. Out of the Blue, it’s not like I was asking. The question on the table was where is Lucas?” She gave him a headshake and turned to go back the way she came, mumbling to herself, “It’s not like you owe me any sort of explanation.”
“But I kind of do.”
Kerry stopped short and turned back his way, crossing her arms. “Why?”
He looked at her, confusion clouding his face.
“Why what?”
“Why would you think you owe me an explanation and why would you think I thought anything at all?” she asked. “It’s not like I spend all my time, or any time for that matter, thinking about you and your nighttime activities, Jesse Strong.”
She didn’t know if her words came out a little more clipped than she had intended them to, but it seemed her sharpness hit a mark. “But still—” he started, and Kerry held up a hand.
“No buts. You don’t owe me any sort of excuse or explanation. We’re friends and coworkers. No more than that. What you do during the nighttime hours is your business.” Kerry paused, thinking of her next words. “Though I would suggest possibly showing any of your other sympathy givers the way in and out of the residence entrance so that they don’t have to come through the shop. I’d also like to make it clear that this is the last morning that I’ll be cleaning up after your nighttime carousing. It’s not part of my job description.”
She glared at Jesse and he stared at her, then finally burst out laughing.
“Did you just say ‘carousing’?”
Kerry let out a groan. “So what? It’s a word.”
He pulled a face. “That it is, Kerry Girl.”
“Oh, screw you with the Kerry Girl. Commenting over my saying ‘carousing’ while you were busy last night with old claw-foot.”
Jesse stilled. Then burst out laughing again. “Good one. The toes were a bit much.”
Kerry shrugged, trying to stay serious, but a snort escaped anyway. “I’m not saying, but I’m saying. They were heavy. Just layered to all hell. Your poor sheets are probably shredded.” She frowned then. Dammit, she didn’t need the image of Jesse shredding sheets with claw-toed Erika or anyone else running through her mind. She could take a lot, but that was maybe too much. “Seriously, could you be a little more circumspect? We are trying to focus on the shop and building on the legacy Mama Joy started. I don’t recall while she was alive there ever being any sort of tradition of young females coming in and out at all hours of the morning and night.”
Jesse stared at her a long time before he nodded and then turned away, mumbling under his breath, “Don’t worry. I know all about her legacy, and I’m glad to know I’ve got you keeping track now too.”
Kerry bit her tongue. Literally. It was better than making an ass of herself by saying the wrong thing. Again. Why did she have to go in and add that last part about the women traipsing in morning and night? What did it matter to her if they traipsed or not-traipsed? “That’s not what I meant, Jesse. All I meant was that I was just thinking of the good of the shop.”
He turned to her and nodded, a half smile making his already beautiful face just that much more so. “Don’t worry, I’ve got it. I get exactly what you are saying. All I was trying to let you know was that Erika isn’t anything serious. My mind is where I said it was yesterday: on doing what I have to do to keep this shop open and afloat. You won’t see Erika, or anyone else for that matter, again.”
Kerry felt her brows tighten. “And once again, Erika or any other women you get on with are none of my business and it’s not like I care. Are we clear?”
There was a knock immediately followed by the door chime. In that moment Kerry didn’t think she could welcome an interruption more. Though the air had been turned on, she was starting to break out in a sweat with this conversation. Thank goodness for Tracy and the UPS delivery, she thought. But just that fast her mind went awash with grief. Tracy? The delivery? Oh hell. There hadn’t been any deliveries since Mama Joy passed, though Tracy was kind enough to stop by the day after and give condolences as soon as he’d heard the news from the other shopkeepers in the neighborhood.
He was a nice guy, quick and efficient, and always had a kind word, but Kerry could barely find her voice this morning thinking of what must be in the package he was holding. It was most likely the long-overdue yarns Mama Joy had been waiting for from the weavers in Oregon. She’d so been looking forward to it and now here it was and she wasn’t here to open it. Dammit. “Hey, Tracy,” Kerry finally said, giving the big guy with the soft brown eyes a weak smile.
“Morning, Kerry. Once again, I’m so sorry for your loss. Ms. Strong will truly be missed.” He cleared his throat and looked at her earnestly. “You both will.” Jesse shifted, drawing Tracy’s attention his way. “I mean you all will. The neighborhood won’t be the same without this shop here.”
Jesse frowned. “The shop is here and will be here.”
Tracy gave him a look for a few seconds, then nodded. “I’m glad to hear it. Well then, I have a delivery for you all.” He turned back Kerry’s way. “You are still taking deliveries for her, right?” Kerry felt her brows furrow. Tracy was friendly, but this was starting to feel like friendly with three ellipses hanging out on the back end. He was sweet, but not that sweet.
“Yeah, you can give that to me,” Jesse suddenly blurted out from over her shoulder. “I can take it. I’ll be accepting on behalf of my mother.”
Tracy looked over Kerry’s shoulder, and his eyes narrowed into a “What’s up with him?” look. But Kerry quickly took the package from his hands and shook her head. “Don’t worry, I’ll sign for it,” she said quickly, scrolling the electronic pen across the little keypad. “This is one of Ms. Joy’s sons, Jesse. He, along with his brothers, will be running the business.”
Tracy’s eyes narrowed further, showing signs of skepticism. But he nodded his head. Then, out of respect, he immediately said to Jesse, “I’m sorry for your loss. Like I said, your mother will be missed.”
Jesse’s eyes were sharp, and his voice was clipped. “That she will be.” He took the box from Kerry’s hands. “Thanks. We won’t hold you up any longer. I’m sure you have a schedule to keep.”
Kerry frowned. Damn, rude much? It wasn’t like Jesse at all, and Tracy was just being nice. But she kept that to herself and smiled Tracy’s way. “Thanks, Tracy. You have a good day. We’ll be seeing you.”
At the sound of the door closing again, she turned to Jesse. “What was that all about?”
Jesse looked up from where he was opening the box, softly fingering the beautiful gradated yarn. “What? I was just letting him know that we’d be open and that I would be here when he came with deliveries.”
Kerry frowned, walking over to inspect the delivery. They each reached for a skein of the pretty blush-colored wool blend at the same time, their fingers brushing across one another; crap if a current didn’t go from Kerry’s two pinky fingers right down to her toes. She pulled back and looked at Jesse. His expression was cool and unaffected as he fingered the yarn, inspecting it carefully, twisting it under the harsh beams of morning sunlight streaming through the front window. “Sure you were,” she said. “Sure you were.”
* * *
After refreshing her coffee, Kerry came back out to the front of the shop and caught sight of the back of Jesse as he stood behind the large oak counter, leaning on Mama Joy’s stool. He was looking out onto the street beyond the store’s paned glass. She had to admit he looked somehow right, but at the same time out of place, in the spot Mama Joy frequented. Kerry looked closer, catching the hint of worry in his eyes and the tight s
et of his lips. Did he feel the same displacement that she was seeing?
She cleared her throat. “So what are you thinking, boss?” Kerry frowned. The “boss” moniker definitely didn’t fit Jesse.
He shook his head. “Don’t call me ‘boss,’ Kerry.” Jesse looked her up and down in a way that probably should have been more distasteful than seductive, so she pushed it to a back corner of her mind, chalking it up to her imagination. “It’s . . . weird,” he finally said. “It’s easier to think of us more like coworkers. I’m not your boss. Besides, you’re helping me out here. Now, what I’m thinking—well, hoping—is that it won’t take us too much time to reopen. The faster the better. The quicker we get some revenue flowing back in here, the better for me with keeping my brothers quiet.”
Kerry agreed. “Okay, I hear you. I think I can get you up to speed pretty fast with how things have been running so that you can get going. Sort of a crash course, since there’s a rush.” She let out a low breath and looked around. The shop was in good physical shape, as far as an establishment of its size and age went. Mama Joy did a great job keeping it clean and tidy. Though it was maybe just a little outdated, if she was being honest and considering the updates of the newer establishments of the neighborhood. But she didn’t know about bogging Jesse down with all that right now. “Let’s see if we can do a surface cleanup and I’ll take you through what I know about Mama Joy’s organization systems. We should be able to get back up and open right away, and in no time you’ll be running things and I can get out of your hair.”
“Hold it,” he said stopping her. “I do want to get going fast, but maybe just making do won’t do.”
“What? Didn’t you just say we need to open ASAP? With this plan, the money won’t be rolling in, but at least you’ll have something coming through.” She paused, thinking of the current traffic flow. “Well, hopefully. I’m sure there are more things we can do to drum up business as time goes on.”
Jesse frowned. “Yeah, but don’t we want to do better than that? I don’t think it’s going to cut it. Not for Damian. We need to push harder.”
Real Men Knit Page 8
