by Jessie G
“We’d be happy too. Right, Chris?” Owen looked at his husband, a smile transforming his face before he quickly ducked his head, and she was more certain than ever that they were hiding a secret. She sensed it a couple of weeks earlier and wondered if they were keeping their own happy announcement under wraps so as not to spoil Corey’s moment, or if there was something else going on. The lawyer in her would root it out eventually.
Chris grinned and reached out to tug on Owen’s beanie, the gesture simple yet filled with so much affection that anyone watching would see the love. “Absolutely.”
Cam didn’t waste a second pushing open the door and ushering them inside just in time to see Corey straining in Billy’s hold, hair flying, pixie face red where it wasn’t stark white. Liam stood at her side, hands being crushed in a talon-like grip, reminding her to breathe.
“Come on, Corey, deep breath in. That’s it,” Liam praised, though Cam didn’t think Corey’s gasp constituted a deep breath. “Now out. Slowly. You control the pain. It doesn’t control you.”
“Really?” Corey didn’t quite scream, but it was close. “Do you want to switch places and see if you can control the pain, you asshole?”
“Oh, honey, you know I would if I could.”
“I’m going to kill you when this is over.” Corey’s snarl was unlike anything Cam had ever heard from her sweet, loving, congenial wife.
“I know.” Despite the threat, Liam beamed. “It’ll be so worth it to hold those babies though, won’t it?”
Another harsh cry made them all wince and then Corey was falling back into Billy’s protective arms. Frozen in the door, they could only watch as her breathing evened, and her color returned, and a slight smile lifted the corners of her mouth.
“God, that hurts.”
“Then why are you smiling?” Cam needed to know.
Opening her eyes, Corey released one of Liam’s hands and immediately reached for her. “Because it means we’re getting close. Soon, our arms will be overflowing with love and we’ll forget all about the pain.”
“Pretty sure that’s a myth.” Owen slapped a hand over his mouth when they all looked at him. “Uh, ignore me. I don’t know what I’m talking about.”
Corey laughed. “Your sister is one of the few women I’ve met that didn’t want to share a horror story, which I appreciated so much. The unsolicited advice gets old quick, no matter how well-meaning. But she’ll be the first to admit that this was the most painfully rewarding experience of her life and I get it now.”
“I don’t...” Cam cleared her throat. If she allowed herself to think about it, she would realize that she would never ‘get it’ because she would never have this experience. But that thought didn’t belong in this room or their future. The past was just that and she never wanted to think about it again. “I mean they agreed to take the picture. If you’re still okay with it?”
“Absolutely, but…hurry. These contractions are getting closer.”
Cam really should get the nurse. Someone qualified to tell them if this was all normal or not. She knew how important a natural birth was to Corey, but not at the expense of her or the babies’ health. That was a trade-off none of them were willing to make.
Then Chris was taking Liam’s phone, urging them to get closer, and just for a second, all was quiet except the steady beep of the heart monitors. It had just been background noise before but now, as they smiled for the camera, Cam counted the beeps and knew everything would be all right.
Chapter Five
Billy
Billy was staring over Corey’s shoulder, drenched in as much of his own sweat as hers, and couldn’t believe his eyes. He had been there for every second, the quiet support at her back while Liam reminded her to breathe and Cam held her hand for dear life. Just over nine hours from the moment she said it was time until their daughter came screaming into the world. Two minutes later, taking his sweet ass time, their son came out yawning.
Through the planning and preparation, the dueling emotional roller coasters of Corey’s pregnancy and Liam’s therapy, all on top of renovating a house, he always believed their hard work would be worth the result. Realizing their dream hadn’t come easy, and it hadn’t been cheap, and now that they were here…he could see that he was wrong.
They could have moved planets in their attempt to be worthy, and it would still pale in comparison to the miracle unfolding before him. Life at its purest, completely uncensored, and one million percent awe-inspiring. Other than his early morning wedding to Liam, nothing would ever come close.
He was just a kid from the projects, a gangbanger who was lucky to survive. Before Owen came into his life, he was headed for a casket. He knew it, his mother and brothers knew it, and he never truly believed he deserved another chance. Getting one didn’t make him a believer either.
A repeat offender who surrendered to the cycle, he had done his time and been released before. It was the people who believed he could be different that inspired a change he hadn’t expected. The Connors, Jared, Saul and the men in the house—they saw something in him that he wanted to live up to. Then Liam saw someone he could love and it was everything.
Believing it could get any better felt greedy and selfish. Most days he woke up feeling like an imposter who was living someone else’s wonderful life. Somehow, he had gone from troublemaker to family man, criminal to…well, not hero. No one would ever call him that. Helper was better. He helped his friends when they needed it and would do it again if they asked.
Because without their generosity, he would not be here to see their children being brought into the world. Liam wouldn’t have given the old him the time of day, and Cam and Corey would have never dialed his number. Without that chance, someone else would have had this moment, but he wasn’t giving it back.
“Billy.” Liam wiped the sweat from his face and leaned in to kiss him. Soft and sweet, a sheen of tears in his eyes, his husband looked as awestruck as he felt. “How are your arms?”
In the back of his mind, Billy knew his whole body hurt from being hunched around Corey for so long. But that was something to worry about later. Right now, he could only follow Liam’s gaze to see a nurse hovering nearby, a little bundle of squalling goodness in her arms. “I’m good.”
“You’re so much better than that,” Liam praised as he moved aside.
The position was awkward with Corey still resting against him, arms filled with their son, and he silently thanked his little family for all those nights cuddled on the couch. If he could support three grown mooches, he could handle one tiny little baby. And then he was. The nurse whose name he promptly forgot, placed their daughter in his arms, gave a tug to secure the blanket, and then stepped back to give them room.
“Oh, baby, you did it,” Cam whispered softly, kissing her wife on the forehead. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”
“We did it,” Corey corrected. “I was just the baby oven.”
Doctor Booker chuckled from the foot of the bed where she was dealing with the afterbirth. “You were a little bit more than that, Mama bear.”
“And she’s healthy, right? I know you said the babies were good…but Corey?” Liam fidgeted as the doctor continued to work. “No complications?”
“No complications.” The doctor glanced up and said, “Except you still haven’t told me what their names are. Am I allowed to know now?”
They all looked at Corey who beamed when she said, “Ashley-Rose and Drake Mason.”
For a second, the nurse looked confused and Billy knew she was trying to process how Cam and Corey’s last names became the children’s first names. “Oh, it’s a combination of your names! That’s cool. Is Rose a family name too?”
“Rose was my mother’s middle name.” Liam blinked back tears and looked at Ashley still snuggled in Billy’s arms. “She would be proud to share it with our daughter.”
When the nurse sniffled, Liam and Corey followed, and Billy glanced over to see Cam’s eyes suspiciously
wet. Usually, she was right there with the commiserating grimace, but it seemed even she wasn’t immune to the moment. “You too?”
“Like you’re not affected?” With a knowing smirk, she wiped the moisture from his cheek and crowed, “This isn’t all sweat, buster.”
Maybe. Maybe not. He would never tell.
As the doctor worked, they huddled together, laughing and crying, and in complete awe of the moment. Too soon, the babies would be whisked away for a full checkup, and they were determined to put that off as long as possible. And when Doctor Booker finally stood and tugged the sheets down, Liam sheepishly pulled out his phone.
“An after photo?”
Corey glared for all of a second before she threw her head back and laughed. “Why not?”
Surprised and eager, he thrust his phone at the nurse, then rejoined their huddle. With Liam and Cam holding the twins, Billy curled around Corey and whispered, “You were amazing, Mama bear.”
“We make a good team, Papa bear.”
Yeah, they totally did, and when the nurse turned the phone around to show them the picture, he could only marvel. Family. He thought he understood what that meant. As broken as his home was growing up, his mother and brothers were family. The Connors welcomed him into their family. Then Saul gave him, and men like him, a safe space to create a chosen one of their own.
Along the way, he discovered the true meaning of brotherhood, found the other half of his heart, and came full circle. It had taken four of them to make family worth being born into. One filled with love and acceptance, with parents united in their determination not to repeat the mistakes of their pasts.
“What’s that smile for?” Liam asked as they followed the twins to the nursery, giving Cam and Corey some time alone.
“I’m happy.” Billy didn’t know how else to describe it. “Until you, I didn’t know what that felt like, and adding those babies—” Billy shook his head. He didn’t want to make Liam think he wasn’t enough. That was the furthest thing from the truth.
“Made it a thousand times better.” Liam laughed softly. “Trust me, I’m right there with you and it scares the crap out of me.”
“Yeah?” They were together in that too. “I’m terrified it’s a dream and even more terrified that I’ll somehow fuck it up.”
Liam was shaking his head before he finished. “You won’t.”
“No, we won’t.” All those past mistakes made him appreciate what he had, and he was holding on with both hands. Not because he believed in himself, but because they believed in him.
“There are the proud papas.” Madeline’s excitement was no surprise as they rounded the corner to find the hallway filled with loved ones. She had been an amazing help as the pregnancy progressed and had solidified her place as his favorite non-related sister-in-law. “How’s Corey?”
“The doctor says everything’s good and now Cam’s trying to convince her to rest.” Billy grinned when Madeline laughed. They all knew Cam would not win that battle.
There was a lot of backslapping as they made their way as a group down to the nursery, and Billy rode that emotional wave right up until he saw his mother waiting at the window. Robert stood beside her, his face pressed to the class, yet she only had eyes for him and after years of anger and rejection, the pride Billy saw there stole his breath.
Leveled by that look, he could only stumble forward and fall into the delicate arms that opened to catch him. “I’m so glad you’re here, Mom.”
“Oh, Billy.” Her whisper was soft and reverent. “Of course, I’m here. You’re a dad, Billy, and I’m so happy for you. So proud of you and Liam and Cam and Corey and…”
When she sniffled, he knew what she wouldn’t say. She had given up on him once. Had walked away for her own sanity and the safety of his siblings, and for the longest time, there didn’t seem to be a way back. It rankled that Tim’s arrest had been the catalyst, but Billy didn’t want to think of where they’d be if that hadn’t happened. Still, forgiveness hadn’t come easy, and learning to trust him again had been even harder, so experiencing this moment together was surreal for both of them.
“Thank you for letting me be a part of their lives.”
“Thank you for wanting to be.” Billy eased back until he could see her face. “Grandma.”
When she pulled him in again, her tears soaking through his shirt, he held on and smiled. To have the family he was born into stand beside the one he chose so they could welcome the one he created was a gift beyond words.
“I love you, Billy.”
He couldn’t ask for more.
Chapter Six
Liam
“You’re awfully quiet.” Billy let their bedroom door close with a soft click, then leaned against it, watching him carefully. “Tired?”
“Not really.” Having been up for well over thirty-six hours, Liam knew they both should be exhausted, but his mind was racing too fast to even think about sleep. “To be honest, I’m not sure what this feeling is, but it’s not what I expected.”
“What did you expect?”
“Excitement. Elation. I expected to be on top of the world right now and instead, I’m…” Liam trailed off with a defiant shake of his head. He had been working so hard to overcome the past, had promised Billy that he would be ready when the babies were born, but he was still struggling. Still fighting demons that were already defeated.
“Afraid?”
“God, yes,” he gasped, no longer shocked by Billy’s ability to read his moods or the relief that followed. His therapist was adamant about acknowledging his feelings and Liam liked to think he was getting better at it—especially in the safety of his marriage—but that was only because Billy was there to help him get the words out. “What if… How can… Shit, I sound like an idiot.”
“No, you sound overwhelmed, and you’re not alone.”
“Really?” When Billy nodded, Liam confessed, “I don’t understand how our lives can be this good. Does that make sense? I mean I know how we got here, but I didn’t actually believe we would. Did you?”
“There was a time when I would have told you no. Men like me don’t live long enough to see our dreams come true and we know better than to wish for the impossible. If something good happens, then I’m looking for the catch. The setup. Because good is just a smokescreen to get me to let down my guard and make it easier for the bad to fuck me up.”
It was sometimes hard to believe, but Billy had become the communicator in their relationship. He seemed to instinctively know when Liam needed to talk and was right there to listen, even if he had to share something first to get them started. His husband’s willingness to bare all just to make him more comfortable changed the framework for his therapy and Liam knew it was the only reason he made any progress.
“And now?”
“Now, I know how dangerous that self-fulfilling prophecy can be and I’m so grateful to the people who helped me to break the cycle.” Billy’s smile was so full of gratitude and promise that it drew him closer. “It’s because of them that I was able to turn my life around and become someone worthy of a man like you. And without you, I wouldn’t have any of this. So yes, our life can be this good, and as long as we’re in it together, I know it will only get better.”
“How do you know?” He wanted to believe so badly that it hurt, and he needed Billy to convince him. “How do you know the bad isn’t just waiting to take us out at the knees?”
“Oh, Liam, there will always be bad shit to deal with, that’s just a fact of life.” That honesty was strangely reassuring, and he was glad Billy didn’t promise the impossible just to put his mind at ease. “Another fact? We know what we have, and we’ll fight to keep it. But we’re not facing an uncertain future alone. It’s not just you and me against the world, baby. Our family stands together, and it’s never failed. Not once.”
Liam couldn’t argue that their family had proven itself time and again. The last five years had been a journey for all of them. They h
elped each other through past traumas and heartaches, battled demons real and long gone, and continually reinforced the bonds they forged by celebrating every success together. If one of their own was in need, everyone stepped up to help. It really was as simple as that.
And because Billy knew he needed all the reinforcement he could get, he asked, “Remember when this house came on the market?”
“Was it actually on the market?” Laughter bubbled up, pushing past all the angst that was weighing him down, and damned if it didn’t feel good. Not quite elation good, but it was a definite improvement. “The sign never even made it out front.”
As if his laughter eased the way, Billy pushed off the door and closed the distance between them. Strong, work-roughened hands caught him by the belt loop, bringing his nervous movements to a stop, and keeping him still while Billy looked him over. Standing beneath that searching gaze was one of the hardest things he’d ever done, and the most worthwhile.
Sometimes, it was hard to tell if he was actually making progress or fooling himself because it was too hard. But being able to see his improvement through Billy’s eyes was empowering and knowing there were no secrets between them was liberating. They knew the best and worst of each other, and their relationship was stronger for it.
Finally, thankfully, Billy found what he was looking for and smiled. “Sure, it did. The realtor was standing out front when Saul snatched it out of his hands.”
“Thank goodness Kyle was there to get it all on video.” Deft fingers worked his belt open, then the button of his pants, and Liam could only sigh in relief. Talking was necessary and good, but it could never compare to Billy’s hands-on approach. “If he hadn’t been coming home at that exact moment, we might not have known until it was too late.”
“Then there would have been a bidding war because no one else was getting this house.” Billy eased his t-shirt up, gently tugging it over his head and tossing it toward the hamper. “As often as we talked about building Owen’s duplex, there’s a reason we put it off and I think it’s because we belonged right here.”
