by Day Leclaire
She stared in utter shock. He couldn’t be serious. She started shaking her head before he’d even finished speaking. “It’s too much, too soon. I’m not ready for any of this. I can’t deal with it right now.”
To her relief, he didn’t argue. “Okay. I can understand that. So here’s what I’m proposing.” His hazel eyes darkened, the gold highlights taking on a tarnished sheen. “Think about my offer. Over the next few months, let’s get together on occasion and see how it goes. Maybe it’ll help you to stop thinking about me as your driver, and start looking at me as a man.”
She didn’t dare tell him that she already saw him as a man. He was simply a man who didn’t appeal. He never had and never would. There’d only been one man who, with a single, smoldering look, had her thinking of darkened bedrooms and passionate lovemaking. Only one man who’d tempted her into foolishness as a teenager, and who could still tempt her to repeat that foolishness now.
“Okay, Cole. I’ll think about what you’ve said.” Anything to put an end to their conversation. “But I can’t make any promises.”
“I’m not asking for any. Yet…” he added pointedly. “In the meantime, why don’t you let me take care of one of your problems. It’ll be my gift to you, no strings attached.”
Something about the way he said that had her internal alarms going off. “What problem?”
“Lucas.”
Just that one word, but she instantly knew what he meant. She shook her head. “No, Cole. Absolutely not.”
He leaned in and lowered his voice. “He only gets controlling interest of HRI if he wins the NASCAR Championship. I can ensure he doesn’t.”
“I said no and I meant no.” She swept away from him. “Lucas is an integral part of this organization and I don’t want to hear another word about this. Ever.”
He held up his hands and offered a dazzling smile. “I hear you.”
Oh, God. She knew that look, had heard that tone used countless times before. It meant he understood, but intended to do what he wanted, regardless. “No, I don’t think you do,” she retorted with a hint of desperation. “I’m dead serious here. You keep your hands—and more importantly, your bumper—off Lucas Boyce. Are we clear?”
He assumed a somber expression that struck her as patently fake. “You got it, boss. I understand perfectly. Hear no evil, see no evil.”
It was all Kellie could do to keep from ripping out her hair. “Cole—”
He laughed. “I’m just messing with you.” He put his hand over his heart. “I promise on my honor that I won’t put a bumper to Bad. Satisfied?”
Somewhat mollified, she nodded. “Thanks.”
He straightened. Approached. “But I can’t promise not to put a bumper to you, Kellie. Fair warning. I’m coming after you.”
“I—” She was saved from a reply by a brisk rap on the door.
Lucas stuck his head in. “Got a minute?”
Intense relief flooded through her. “Sure. We’re done here.”
Cole stiffened, a spark of something that might have been anger leaping into his eyes. “Are we done?” he murmured.
“Was there something else?” she asked with formal briskness, hoping he’d get the message.
He released his breath in a sigh. “I guess not. Just remember what I said.”
“I will, if you will.”
Lucas waited until Cole had left the room before looking at Kellie. He lifted an eyebrow. “What’s going on?”
She managed a smile, though the memory of the kiss they’d shared two nights before made it difficult to think clearly. Her gaze slid to his mouth and she couldn’t seem to shift her attention, no matter how hard she tried. He’d tasted so amazing, overwhelming her senses from that first incredible touch. And it hadn’t been just his mouth. It had been how his body had felt against hers, the power and strength of his arms around her, the delicious sweep of his hands molding her close. If they’d been anywhere other than in a hospital, she’d have been totally and utterly swept away.
He must have sensed the direction of her thoughts. His smile grew, his expression too shrewd for her liking. “Problem?” he asked, his voice low and intimate.
She’d lost her mind. There wasn’t any other explanation for her lapse. Using every ounce of remaining willpower, she forced herself to switch gears, starting with tearing her gaze from his mouth. Spinning on her heel, she swept to the far side of her office. “I’m just having trouble adjusting to my new role. In the past, Jinx handled the discipline while I took care of the business end of things.”
“Discipline?”
“I had a talk with Cole and Jamie about their activities last night.” She faced him with a grimace. “It wasn’t pleasant.”
“You spoke to them without me?”
The question chased away any lingering remnants of desire, and she stilled. “Yes, I talked to them without you.” Her eyebrows drew together in the suggestion of a frown. “You don’t really think you should have been there, do you?”
He matched her frown with one of his own. “I’m a partner in the firm. What causes trouble for HRI causes trouble for me.” Turning, he closed the door, closeting them in her office. “If nothing else, we should have discussed how to handle the situation beforehand. Even if you didn’t want me to address either of them directly, I should have sat in on the conversation so it was clear our response was a joint one.”
“I don’t agree. Neither of them would have responded well to having you witness that particular conversation.”
“That’s a distinct possibility. Nonetheless, we should have had a conversation before you made a unilateral decision.”
As much as she’d like to argue that fact, she couldn’t. “Fair enough,” she conceded. “Next time I will.”
To her relief, he let it go, turning the conversation in a slightly different direction. “This aspect of the business isn’t going to get any easier, Kellie, even with my input on the various decisions you make. If I win the NASCAR Championship this year and take controlling interest, you’ll still need to deal with some of the personality issues when they crop up, mainly because I’m a fellow driver and someone they clearly regard as an interloper. They’ll take any disciplinary actions a hell of a lot better from you than from me.”
“Jamie might listen to you.”
Lucas shook his head. “Not even Jamie. I’m not his father and he wouldn’t appreciate my acting as if I am.”
“You’re right, of course. From now on I’ll consider discipline part of my duties, and I’ll discuss issues like this with you before I take action.” To her relief her voice remained cool and calm, but she didn’t trust it to stay that way much longer. She deliberately changed the subject. “So, what did you need me for?” she asked. “Another problem?”
“Forget it. This isn’t the right time. Not after the morning you’ve had.”
“You have no idea,” she said with a bit too much feeling, and instantly realized she’d made a mistake.
“Was there something more going on than last night’s fun and games?” Lucas’s eyes narrowed in clear assessment. “You were talking to Cole when I walked in. Not Jamie and Cole. Just Cole. Was that still about last night, or do we have another partnership issue the two of us need to discuss?”
She didn’t dare tell him the particulars of her conversation with Cole, or mention either of the suggestions he’d made. His personal proposition had been shocking enough. But if she dared repeat the one regarding Lucas, it would guarantee a full-blown brawl, something she’d do anything to avoid.
She dismissed Lucas’s question with a casual wave of her hand. “It’s nothing I can’t handle.”
If anything her comment had Lucas’s expression hardening. “What’s going on, Kellie?”
“Just contract negotiations.” She took a seat behind her desk and pulled a file toward her. “Cole’s up for renewal at the end of this season.”
Lucas didn’t say anything for a long moment. “In case it�
�s escaped your notice, that would fall under the heading of partnership discussion. Serious partnership discussion, to be exact.”
“I wouldn’t agree to any contractual issues without your agreement.”
“Correction, Mrs. Hammond.” He planted his hands on her desk and leaned in. “You won’t so much as discuss contractual issues without my presence, as well as my agreement.”
Kellie released a soft sigh. “Do we have to do this now?”
“Yeah, I think we do.” He straightened and she could tell he was deciding how best to deal with her. “You and I have an interesting, if turbulent history. Maybe we should get some of our personal issues out into the open and resolve whatever’s still lingering between us.”
His comment gave her the opening she needed to deal with what had happened two nights ago, to put it behind them once and for all. She darted a swift glance in his direction, attempting to assess his mood. As usual, he was next to impossible to read. Years ago she’d had far better success. But that had been before his meteoric rise in the racing world…and his marriage to Bridgette.
Kellie still remembered the pain of hearing the announcement on the news. There’d been a shot of the happy couple, the gorgeous blue-eyed blonde beaming into the camera while Lucas had maintained an impassively remote visage, most of his expression hidden behind his signature shades.
“She looks a bit like you,” Jinx had offered gruffly. “Not as refined. But there’s a passing resemblance.”
She’d forced an amused look and asked, “Don’t men have weaknesses for a certain type?”
“Sometimes,” he conceded. “Cole, for instance. But I’ve never noticed that about Lucas.” He hesitated, adding in a low voice, “Have you ever regretted it, Kellie?”
She crossed to his side. Dropping beside his wheelchair, she gathered his hands in hers. “Do I regret the affair I had with him? No. It was a special night. One I’ll never forget. And it gave me a son, a son who’s one of the true delights in my life.”
“And me? Do you regret marrying me?”
She shook her head, offering Jinx a loving smile. “Not even a little. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. Without you—” Tears filled her eyes. “I don’t know what I’d have done.”
He still appeared troubled. “You could have approached Lucas and told him you were pregnant with his child.”
It was a suggestion she’d heard before, and one she’d always been quick to quash in no uncertain terms. “Not a chance. He made his feelings crystal clear the morning after. From day one he was focused on his career and only his career.”
“Not only.”
She flushed. “Fine. With the occasional distractions. But his career has always come first. That hasn’t changed, despite what Bridgette might think.” She spared a swift, pained peek at the television screen. “She’ll find out soon enough.”
“If he’d known about Jamie…” He gathered her face in his hands. She’d never seen him so somber. “It’s not the same when you’re talking about a child. It makes a difference, honey.”
Would it have? Probably, but not the way Jinx meant. She knew Lucas. His sense of duty was a mile wide. He’d have quit racing in order to make sure his wife and child were provided for. She couldn’t allow him to do that. Not then. And now…Well, now it was too late. Too much time had gone by. They’d both moved on with their lives.
“You’ve commented on his dedication, yourself, Jinx,” she’d said. “You and Dad have both said you’ve never seen a driver more committed to his career. He wouldn’t have won his sixth NASCAR Championship and be heading toward a record-tying seventh if he hadn’t been. When he first started out, a wife and child would have gotten in his way. He didn’t have the maturity or the vision to see past it the way you did.”
“But it would have been his choice. You should have told him.”
She bowed her head. “You don’t understand. I couldn’t.”
“Why not?”
She hesitated, not certain how much she should reveal. Finally, she admitted, “He told me something that next morning, something that explained why his career was so important to him. I couldn’t do anything to ruin that for him.” She took a deep breath, gathering her self-control. “It would have destroyed the man he was if I’d taken that away from him.”
“He could have still raced.”
“He would have felt obligated to get a ‘real’ job, one with a steady paycheck and benefits.” Her shoulders jerked in a helpless shrug. “I couldn’t do that to him.”
Jinx’s attention switched to the television screen. “Things have changed since then. Looks like he’s feeling secure enough now. Secure enough to have a wife and still race.” He lifted an eyebrow. “What if he gives Jamie a brother or sister? What then?”
The image roused emotions that should have been long dead, emotions that threatened to crush her. It took every ounce of self-possession to hold them at bay. “We’ll let him have his happiness, just as we have ours.” She covered her husband’s hands with her own. “We have each other, Jinx. Best of all, we have Jamie. We made a family. We built HRI from scratch. And since Cole joined the team, we have one of the best drivers on the circuit. I’m not dissatisfied. Are you?”
He gently turned her face toward him and feathered a kiss across her mouth. “Not at all.” His expression grew grave. “But are you happy?”
She offered him a tremulous smile. “I couldn’t be happier.”
The memory faded and Kellie stared at Lucas, remembering the kiss she’d shared with him, comparing it to the kisses she and Jinx had exchanged over the years. She realized now that she’d been lying to her husband, even if she hadn’t been aware of it at the time.
She’d been happy, after a fashion. But it hadn’t been the sort of ecstatic happiness she’d sensed she would have known with Lucas. Jinx had taught her about friendship, and the deep and abiding love that came from that. But it hadn’t been a soul-deep everlasting passion. At least, not the sort of love that a wife should have felt for her husband.
Now, after all these years, Lucas was in her life again. And he wanted to resolve their differences, no doubt to make his position within the HRI organization more comfortable. Well, she couldn’t blame him for that.
She chose her words with care. “I appreciate your wanting to involve yourself in all aspects of HRI. As a partner in the firm, you should. But when it comes to the two of us, I think we need to keep our relationship strictly business. The other night was an aberration. It can’t happen again.”
“Is that what you consider our kiss?” he asked blandly. “An aberration?”
She gave him a direct look in return. “That’s all I want it to be. It can’t be anything else. You’re my driver, as well as my partner. There’s a possibility that you’ll have controlling interest of HRI before the end of the year. Things are complicated enough without making it any worse.”
“Worse?”
She waved that aside. “You know what I mean. I don’t have time for a personal relationship. Not with you.”
“And not with Cole?”
Had he seen something? she wondered in alarm. Sensed it? “And not with Cole,” she concurred evenly. “Not that it would be any of your business if I did.”
“Point taken.” He came around her desk. Before she could do more than utter a small gasp of alarm, he scooped her out of her chair and into his arms. “But allow me to make one more point. You might think we can keep our relationship pure business. But there’s a small, vital detail you’ve overlooked.”
She eyed him warily. “What detail?”
“This one.”
She didn’t have the chance to offer more than a token objection. He molded his mouth to hers, a hungry groan rumbling deep in his chest. She responded to that sound on an instinctive level. Unable to help herself, she opened to him and melted slowly into his embrace. She found herself standing on her own two feet again, although given how weak her legs were, she wasn’
t sure how it was physically possible. The kiss deepened beneath his insistent invasion. It was a brand of possession, man reverting to his most primal essence. Uncontrollable desire swept through her, filling her with the urge to take all he had to give.
Her hands stole across the breadth of his shoulders and the well-defined contours of his chest. She’d steal these few treasured seconds and explore the territory she’d once known so well. Discover each and every change the years had wrought. Dear heaven, how had she managed to live so long without this? And now that he’d reminded her of all she’d forced herself to forget, how could she walk away again?
It was that awareness, the memory of the crippling pain she’d experienced the last time they’d parted, that brought her to her senses. She ripped free of his embrace. “Stop it, Lucas. We can’t do this. Not again. It was a mistake the first time and it’s a worse mistake now.”
“I don’t agree.”
A fierce determination took hold and he leaned into her, telling her without words of his intent. He gave her enough time to pull away, to escape the inevitable. But she couldn’t, not when his mouth gentled her with a kiss so tender and so thorough that it melted every ounce of resistance.
This time there was a newness to his taking, as though he were starting over. As though all that had gone before had been wiped clean. She was seventeen again and kissing him for the first time. And yet there was a familiarity there, a delicious sensuality that spoke of maturity and experience and a knowledge of how to fulfill a woman’s deepest, most closely held needs.
In his arms, in that moment, Kellie came completely undone, surrendering to him just as she had all those years ago. The minute he sensed that surrender, he broke the kiss, leaving her in a world of unfulfilled want.
“Tell me that was a mistake,” he murmured against her mouth. And with that, he left the room.
