He raised a hand to try to comfort me. “The boys left for that party, and we want to make sure the two of you aren’t planning on going there with them.”
I gestured to my outfit. “I’m clearly not going to a party. I already told mom it was only for the sports teams anyway.” At least that part was all true.
My dad nodded after a moment before putting the car in reverse. But instead of backing up, he pointed at me. “No party. No leaving. No Dixon boys.”
My lips parted to accept their rules, but a question I’d wondered for so long slipped free instead. “And if it wasn’t a Dixon?”
Dad’s head snapped to me, surprise written all over his face when he didn’t receive immediate obedience. “Excuse me?”
“You said ‘no Dixon boys.’ If I was dating Philip,”—I sneered his name, hating that my parents loved Philip Rowe so much and always brought him up like he might ever be an option—“would y’all still be like this? With these rules and checking on me multiple times a day? Making it so I couldn’t even hug him? Always reminding me that I could be back in Utah at a moment’s notice?”
Shock and irritation fled from my mom, but it was my dad who spoke up. “Why don’t you do everyone a favor and find out?” The words a pure challenge.
My mouth formed a hard line as my head slowly shook.
“If not?” he continued. “Well, what happens is up to you. No party. No leaving. No Dixon boys,” he repeated slowly.
“I know.” It was a whispered acceptance, but it was enough for them.
With another nod from my dad, they reversed out of the driveway, and I made my way back into the house and up to Madison’s room.
In the time I’d been gone, she’d already cleaned it up and was fixing her hair at her vanity.
She gave me a wide-eyed look. “Do they need me to come out there too?”
“No, they left.”
Her eyes darted over my face, studying me. “I’m sorry, friend.”
I shrugged and headed for my bag. “I wonder if they’ll ever realize that if they weren’t like this, I wouldn’t sneak out or go behind their backs.”
At that, Madi snorted. “Um . . . you do realize that I do all this sneaking out and sneaking people in with you?”
I paused from pulling out my clothes, my lips stretching into a grin. “Valid point.”
“What do you think?” she asked, gesturing to the skimpy little outfit she’d laid out on the bed.
“Super cute and super sexy.” I turned to face her, my voice dropping to a whisper. “But how long are you actually going to be wearing it?”
Her cheeks reddened, but she just shrugged. “It deserves to be worn, even if only for a few minutes. And don’t think I didn’t notice which way you decided to go tonight.”
My grin turned mischievous as I finished pulling one of Beau’s older football jerseys over my head.
“His favorite,” Madison said bluntly.
“His favorite,” I agreed as I stepped into my little dance shorts. Once I was dressed, I pulled my hair out of the bun and searched for my brush. “When are we gonna call them?”
“Already did as soon as you left,” she said, looking all kinds of excited. “Hunter said they’d be here in a bit.”
I sucked in a deep breath when hummingbirds took flight in my stomach. “Can’t wait.”
I needed this. Beau and I hadn’t had any alone time since the beginning of summer. With our junior year starting next week, and everything that came along with it, alone time was going to be even harder to find.
Once we were both ready, and Madison had a robe covering her surprise outfit, I sank to her bed, my stomach clenching in a terrible way as my thoughts spun. “Madi . . . what would you do to be with Hunter?” At her impish look, I tossed a pillow at her, a huff dancing across my lips. “I mean be with him. Like, in a relationship. Always.”
“Anything,” she said immediately, not even taking time to breathe or blink. “I’m marrying him someday.”
“I know.” The corners of my mouth lifted, but the action took effort. “You’ve been telling me that since the week we met.”
“Pretty sure I’ve been telling Hunter since the day we met,” she added, trying to sound amused but coming up short. “Why do you look so . . . not Savannah?”
“I have this feeling,”—I gestured to my stomach—“and I know it sounds super ridiculous and typical teenage drama, whatever. But I mean, I have a really strong feeling my parents will try to stop me from being with Beau. More than they already have.”
Madi worried her bottom lip as she studied me, looking all kinds of concerned and apologetic. “I might just think you’re crazy if I didn’t know your parents. But . . .”
“Yeah. But,” I said with a pathetic laugh. “After last summer and then how quickly they set all those rules tonight. And when they showed up here, I asked them if they would be doing all this if it was Philip Rowe I was dating instead of Beau. My dad said, ‘Do everyone a favor and find out.’”
Madison’s eyes went wide. “He didn’t.”
I just lifted my brows in response.
“What did you—but you aren’t going to, right?”
“What? No. Of course not,” I said quickly, shocked that she would even ask. “But then he said if not, what happens is up to me. And I had this feeling when he said it that he was threatening me. Not with more restrictions than they’re already trying to put on us, but—”
“With sending you away again,” Madison finished for me.
“Right.”
She looked to the side, her fingers twisting together in worry. After a while, she asked, “What are you gonna do?”
I don’t know, I don’t know.
“I—” A shocked breath ripped from me when knocking sounded on the window behind me, my heart taking off in a painful sprint as I turned and saw Hunter’s face. “Jesus.”
Madison giggled and rushed to the window, opening it soundlessly to let him in. Their mouths already fused together before he was fully in the room.
“Okay, okay,” I said softly as I hurried over to them in case their kissing led to something worse—like Hunter falling. “Let him get in first and let me get out.”
A low laugh left Hunter as he pressed another firm kiss to Madison before finishing climbing over the windowsill.
Madison grabbed my hand as I passed her. “See you soon?” But the squeeze of her hand and the way her eyebrows drew together in sympathy told me so much more.
She was sorry about my parents.
It would be okay.
Love you, I mouthed.
“Love you back,” she whispered.
Hunter glanced from her to me, then hurried to stop me before I could climb onto the large oak tree’s branches that were perfectly positioned outside the window. “Hey, I need to warn you . . .”
My stomach bottomed out.
My heart ached and twisted and reached for the boy I knew was waiting for me down below.
“What happened?” I asked, voice shallow.
“Beau’s in a bad way tonight.”
Hunter dragged the hand that wasn’t holding on to Madison through his hair, his face creasing apologetically. “When I got inside after y’all left, our parents were getting into it. Yours said that ours were trying to undermine their parenting—their rules and wishes for you.”
Embarrassment from the events of that night swirled through me so intensely that I felt sick from it.
“They got on Beau for dragging you into things he shouldn’t, for putting you in positions and situations you shouldn’t be in. Said he had you trapped in a toxic relationship. Told him if he cared about you at all, he’d let you go.”
My stare shifted to Madison, to the sorrow there that only scratched the surface of what I felt for Beau. With everything they said about him, with every horrible word said to him, it opened another wound, slowly bleeding me out.
I reached for the windowsill, but Hunter stopped me again. “
Savannah, he punched a wall as he was leaving the kitchen. Your parents saw him do it.”
“Oh,” I breathed, my hand coming up to clench at my stomach as my soul begged to get to Beau.
“He hasn’t said a word all night.”
As soon as Hunter released my arm, I carefully swung my leg out onto the branch that rested just outside Madison’s window, then looked back at him. “What did your parents say?”
Hunter gave me a helpless look. “They were arguing, Savannah, they said a lot.”
“When mine told Beau to let me go.”
“They about lost it,” he said, the corner of his mouth lifting with pride. “Mom started yelling then, asking why Beau wasn’t good enough for you. Dad told them they should probably leave for the night if they were ‘gonna be spoutin’ that shit in his house.’”
A soft smile tugged at my lips. “Thanks, Hunt.”
He nodded and helped me out the rest of the way. “Be careful.”
I snorted my amusement as I deftly descended the thick branches that we’d been using for the past couple of years to sneak in and out of Madison’s room. For years before that, we’d climbed it just to prove our fearlessness. I could get down that tree in my sleep.
Especially when Beau Dixon was waiting for me at the bottom.
I jumped from the last branch to the ground and was immediately swept into a pair of warm, muscled arms. His hands curling tight against me and holding me close as he buried his face into my neck, breathing me in.
I wove my fingers through his hair and let my eyelids close as I felt his anger and pain clash with his relief. “I love you.”
“Why?”
My spirit wrenched at the self-loathing pouring from him and wrapping around that simple, terrible word. Leaning back to look into his darkened stare, I said, “Because you’re good and—”
A harsh breath fled from him as he looked away, his jaw straining.
“You are.”
“Savannah, the last thing I am is good.”
I pushed against his chest. “That is not true. I know your heart, and I see beneath that bear of a surface you show everyone else. You’re kind and patient and gentle.” I gripped his shirt in my hands to keep him as close as possible. “And the way you love me? The way you treat me? Beau, you are good.”
Disbelief rolled from him, his brows pulling low over his anguished stare. “You deserve the world,” he said, voice thick, then hurried to amend, “Everything. You deserve everything.”
His tone had acid rolling in my stomach and my arms falling heavily to my sides.
“And everyone knows I can’t give you that. That I’ll drag you down.”
“They’re wrong.”
“They aren’t,” he maintained. “And I can’t be the reason you don’t succeed. Thrive. Get everything you want out of life. I won’t.”
“What are you saying?” It was a breath. A denial. Because my heart was screaming that he wasn’t about to say what my mind knew was coming next.
His lips parted before forming a thin line. That jaw straining and his body trembling as one of his hands lifted to his chest before cradling my head in his big palm.
“Beau, what are you saying?” I begged when no words left him.
His eyes searched my face for a long while before he spoke. The words forced and pained. “Savannah, I gotta let you go.”
“No.”
“Savannah,” he pleaded when I smacked his hands away and staggered back.
“No,” I choked out. “This is because of my parents? Hunter told me what they said—what they told you to do.”
Beau’s stare flashed up to the thick, full branches of the tree before meeting me again, frustration wavering on his expression before it was replaced with a broken mixture of devastation and determination.
“They can’t do this.”
“They’re right,” Beau said, the admission leaving him on a pained wheeze.
“No, they aren’t. Why can’t you see you the way I do?” I cried out. “Why can’t you see how much I love you?”
“I do,” he said quickly, reaching for me again as if he couldn’t help it. Needing me as badly as I needed him. “Fuck, I do. But, Savannah, you shouldn’t. From the day I met you, your mom’s been telling you to stay away from me. You need to listen to her.”
“Like hell I do.”
He curled his hands around my cheeks, pulling me close as all that agony and self-hatred bled from him. “Staying with me will only ruin you, why can’t you see that?”
I gripped his wrists, my chest rising and falling unevenly as I struggled to catch my breath. “You . . . having you—being loved by you—is everything I want for my life.” His forehead lowered to mine as I continued. “But if you tell me right now that you don’t love me, that you want this to be over, then I will try to accept that.”
His fingers curled tighter, tangling in my hair.
I knew he would do this—do what my parents were demanding—because he believed them. Because he believed everyone. But he wouldn’t lie to me, even for the sake of giving me what he thought was a better life.
“I love you with every last breath in my body, and I will love you long after I die.” The declaration was soft but filled with an intensity I felt in my bones.
My heart took off, trying desperately to reach the boy it belonged to. But I forced myself to remain still. To repeat the question he hadn’t answered.
“You want this to be over?” I asked, my tongue darting out to wet my lips. “Us?”
“I want you to have—”
“You know that isn’t what I’m asking.”
His eyelids closed and he exhaled slowly. “Savannah, I want you for the rest of my life.”
I nodded, my nose brushing along his. “Then ask me what I want.”
His stare met mine, tense and pleading. “What do you want, angel?”
“I want you to understand that life without you doesn’t make sense—it hasn’t since the day I met an angry bear of a boy covered in mud. And I want you exactly the way you are.” I released one of his wrists to place my hand over his fiercely beating heart. “I’ve always loved you. Not some idea of what you might be if you were different. Just you.”
I let my other hand drift to his knuckles, rough and already scabbing over from where he must’ve split them open again that evening, and watched as shame flickered across his face.
“I want you to understand that my parents are wrong about you. They’re wrong for saying the things they do, and I’m so sorry that you’ve had to endure it for even a second. I want you to know I’m not going anywhere. That I’ll be here, with you, by your side, forever.” I lifted a shoulder in a weak shrug. “Or until you decide otherwise.”
“That won’t happen,” he said gravely.
“Then you’re stuck with me, Beau Dixon.”
“Lucky,” he corrected. “Fucking lucky to be with you.” He brushed his mouth across mine, the action so light, so sweet, it stole my breath and left my lips tingling. A ragged breath left him, all acceptance and worry and relief, and released some of the weight on his shoulders. “Then can I take you somewhere?”
“I was hoping you would.” A slight tease danced on my tongue when I said, “I got all dressed up for you and everything.”
A soft groan rolled up his throat as he pressed his mouth to mine, stealing the giggle that had begun slipping free. “Saw that,” he growled against the kiss. “You wearing my last name will always be my favorite.”
“I know.”
“Come on.” He nipped at my bottom lip. “I have a surprise for you.”
My eyes widened when he began pulling me away from the tree. “You do?”
His stare flashed my way when he tucked me against his side, a secretive smirk hinting at the corner of his mouth.
“What is it?”
“A surprise.”
I pushed against his stomach. “Beau.”
“Few minutes,” he assured me. “Just got
ta wait a few minutes.”
I let my head fall back dramatically, then tried to pull him toward his Explorer faster, but he kept his steady pace. “A few minutes is an hour too long. Let’s go.”
A dark, rumble of a laugh left him, his dimples flashing. “Crazy girl.”
“Bear.”
He drew me closer when we neared his car and leaned down to press his lips to my ear. “You really wanna know?” he asked, disbelief coating the words.
I blew out a slow sigh. “No.”
“Didn’t think so.” Reaching forward, he opened the passenger door, his eyes dancing with veiled excitement as he watched me climb in. Amusement lighting some of the darkness that clung to him when he reached out to trail the tips of his fingers along my jaw. “Been waiting all week for this, and it’s fucking worth it. Waiting years would be worth it.”
Confusion pulsed through me, but he just stepped back and closed the door.
I watched as he walked around the front of the car, trying to figure out what he could possibly be up to. What he could’ve kept from me for a week—what could be worth waiting years for.
Beau.
Beau was worth waiting years for.
But I had him.
“You haven’t figured it out?” he asked as he started the car and pulled onto the street.
“I mean, if we were eighteen and it wasn’t so late, I would think you were taking me to the courthouse. Or Vegas, but that isn’t minutes away.”
His head snapped to the side. His stare locked on mine in a way that made my stomach curl with heat and my heart go all kinds of crazy, even long after he’d looked back at the road.
“Savannah, the day I marry you, we aren’t gonna be in a courthouse or in front of a fake Elvis.” His head shook faintly. “Small. Simple. Sunset. Peonies. At the plantation house.”
My lips slowly parted as surprise wove through my love for this boy. “You remember that?”
His gaze drifted to me for a second. “You say something, I’m listening. You say something about our future? Babe, I’m never forgetting it.”
“Beau . . .”
“And that’ll be worth waiting for. Just like that house will be worth waiting for because it’s gonna be ours.”
Fire Page 11
