“I’ve wanted to ask you” —Zale cupped her face and kissed her forehead— “but I just didn’t know how to approach it.”
Oh goodness. He’d felt the same way all along. Was their happy ever after about to begin at the top of this lighthouse? She swallowed quickly as joy spread through her, enveloping her in a blanket knit from pure bliss. Her breath bottled up in her chest as she waited for the words that came next.
Zale stoked his thumbs over her cheeks, sending ripples of pleasure to her heart. “I’d be honored if you’d take the position of COO at Carris Retreats.”
For a moment, there was complete silence as the world around her abruptly stopped. After one heartbeat, then two, it roared to life again until her ears were ringing. “What—what did you just say?”
“The position of COO at Carris.” He smiled. “It’s yours.” Zale tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and she flinched.
How stupid she’d been to think he was about to offer some grand declaration of love, when it was all about business?
“It could be challenging with one of my rules being no relationships with an employee. It’s one of the reasons I wanted us to be discreet at the hotel. You’ll be a huge asset to the company, and the last thing I wanted was for other team members to think you were given preferential treatment because we’ve been seeing each other. Even though we’ve enjoyed each other, I know we’ll both get mutual satisfaction and success out of a working relationship.”
She took another step back, and his eyes clouded and his brows creased together. Zale reached for her, but she slipped out of his grasp. She wanted him to be her husband, her partner, and her best friend—not her superior. “You think I want to be your COO?” she shot back before a bitter laugh escaped her lips. His eyes widened, and his jaw went slack as though she'd slapped him. “I don’t want to know how long you’ve been planning to offer me this position. But if you think for one second that I’d be grateful to jump out of your bed an into an office down the hall, you’re not the man I thought you were. And you’re sure as hell not the leader I made you out to be.” No apologies spilled from his lips, no effort to undo the pain his words had inflicted. He really didn’t get it. He stared at her in stunned silence, and that was all she needed to walk away. Tears burned behind her eyelids, and she choked back a sob. What was wrong with her that every person in her life chose benefiting their business over loving her?
“Gemma, stop.” Zale stumbled over the words and tried to put a hand on her shoulder.
“No.” She crossed her arms protectively over her chest. Gemma couldn't let him in again. She didn't think she'd be able to hold it together. “I started to tell you how I feel, that I have feelings for you, and you offered me a job.” Now the tears were falling, and she desperately swiped them away. “I’ve only ever wanted someone to love and to love me back. I thought I found that in you, but I was wrong. Everyone I’ve encountered treats me like their economic or social pawn in a game of chess—including you.”
“You’re wrong.” His eyes were feverish as they locked on her with a pained stare. “Just give me a second to think—”
“This isn’t something you should have to think about. It’s how you feel, here.” Gemma jammed a fist against her chest, utterly broken.
“Gemma, I do have feelings for you. It’s just that a relationship, well…” He raked his hands through his hair. “It’s been a long time since I’ve trusted someone in that way. And now I have a child to think of. If you decided you missed your life in New York and left us, Mila would be broken.” She didn’t even bother to wipe away the tears now. He didn’t want her. He didn’t love her. And he certainly didn’t trust her. This was so much worse than never feeling heard or valued within her own family because she thought she’d found a person who understood her on every level. Someone who finally saw her. She’d never been more wrong in her life.
“Do you think so little of me? That I’d engrain myself into your lives only to walk away? That I’d toss you aside like an old pair of shoes?” Gemma shook her head. “I’m glad you told me how you really feel, only I wish you’d done it sooner instead of wasting my time. At least tell Mila I love her and that I’ll write her. Goodbye, Zale. I wish you the best. I really do,” she said on a sob, and fled from the observation deck and down the winding stairs. When she reached the bottom, she nearly barreled into the lighthouse keeper.
“I need a taxi, please,” she said to him, pushing every ounce of strength she had into her wavering voice.
“Well, now, there’s one outside. Always someone needing a ride to and from during busy season, but—”
Gemma didn’t wait for a reply. Footsteps thundered down the stairs. She had to get away and was too embarrassed and hurt to face him again. Gemma had been about to bare her soul, and he’d crushed it before she could even try. She slid in the back of the taxi that was waiting off to the side of the lighthouse. The man was in the middle of his lunch and didn’t even have his lights on. “Airport, please. I’ll double your fare if we can leave now.”
The driver tossed his sandwich to the side and started the ignition. She saw a flash in the rear-view mirror and looked out to see Zale running down the path toward them. When the taxi pulled onto the main road that had led them to the lighthouse, Zale stopped and curled his hands over his head. A fresh wave of tears threatened to fall, and she looked away from the mirror, closed her eyes, and cried.
Chapter 16
Zale looked in the mirror at his sallow skin and the dark rings underneath his eyes that had appeared since Gemma walked out of his life a week ago. Nothing was the same. He wasn’t sure how she’d rooted herself so quickly into their lives, but she had. They’d agreed on a no-strings-attached fling. He’d been at peace with that, because he had so many reasons why he couldn’t have a relationship with her. Not just Gemma, but any woman. If he could trust, relinquish control to someone, he’d want that person to be her. Accepting her help at the resort though was much different than welcoming her into his life. A partner in all things. Falling in love meant you were at the mercy of another person, and could you ever be truly sure what they would do?
He’d gotten the idea to offer her the COO position after they’d spent the afternoon on the boat together. Dalton didn’t value her talents. She wanted to make a difference, build a brand with strong core values. He wanted to give her that opportunity. Perhaps offering her a job also fulfilled a selfish part of him that didn’t want to say goodbye. He couldn’t have it all, though. How stupid he’d been to think he could see her everyday while still remaining emotionally isolated.
He had several missed calls on his cell phone from employees and the managers at his other properties, but he couldn't be bothered to answer them. For the first time in his life, he didn’t want to face his responsibilities. His father had left him, Margaret had also walked away from him—but Gemma? He had chased her away.
Esmerelda weaved in and out of his legs as he walked to the living room and flopped on the couch. He was rotten to be around right now, but the cat didn’t seem to mind. For someone who thrived on being in control, he was certainly shirking his responsibilities. It struck him that Gemma had changed him in a way he hadn’t thought possible. Two weeks ago, he never would’ve left his staff to run the resort no matter how miserable he was. Gemma had taught him how to listen and have more faith in the people he hired. They were the best of the best, after all. If he could alter his thinking in that, could he also trust that the woman he loved wouldn’t break him in the end?
How he missed her smile and sharp wit. He missed watching her play with Mila and the kitten who had quickly adapted to her new home at the hotel. Gemma was his match in every single way. It was a miracle he’d found a woman who challenged him at every turn, who had no qualms about telling him he was wrong.
A knock came at the door, and he closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. How long would his staff continue to send him well-intentioned pick-me-ups and room service meals? W
hen a key jingled in the lock, he sat up straight. Only Mila and his mother had a key. The cat trotted gracefully toward the front door, and Zale dragged himself up and followed.
The door swung open, revealing his mother and daughter, and the hairs on the back of his neck rose. "Is everything all right?" He took several large strides toward them and put the back of his hand against Mila's forehead. She was rarely sick, and she should still be in school.
“I called Ya-ya to come pick me up.” Mila shed her backpack, leaving it propped against the wall and scooped up the cat, kissing it tenderly on the nose. “I couldn’t concentrate. Not when you’re sad, and Gemma’s sad.”
His stomach coiled. This was his doing. All the pain they were dealing with could’ve easily been avoided if he’d kept things professional with Gemma.
“Don’t forget our deal, paidi mou.” His mother gave Mila a light elbow squeeze.
“I know, homework first, because you want to talk to Daddy alone." She turned on her heel, cat still cradled in her arms, and headed toward her room. A few moments later the door clicked, and his mother sat on the couch beside him.
“Zale,” she sighed. “Why don’t you go to her? I can see it’s torturing you, and I’m certainly capable of staying here with Mila. We’ll have a grand time.” Her brow wrinkled as she looked at him through concerned eyes.
“I pushed her away. I’m afraid the damage I’ve done is irreversible.” She’d fled from him leaving his heart heavy in her absence.
“What did you argue over that upset her so?” She tilted her head, a strand of silver hair falling out of her neat bun.
Zale was silent for a moment. He didn’t want to relive the afternoon at the lighthouse. What was supposed to be an enjoyable afternoon together had turned so quickly it had left him speechless. His mother patted his knee, stood up, and went to the kitchen. He rested his head back against the couch and looked out at the calm waters and robin’s egg sky. The stark contrast between his mood and the bright and glorious day nearly made him laugh. The kitchen cabinet opened and shut, followed by the clink of two cups being placed on the counter. The coffee machine churned and hissed to life, sending the scent of the dark roast through the air.
His mother came back to sit beside him and handed him the mug Mila had given him for Father's Day a couple of years ago.
“Now, talk to me. What happened?” She clutched her own mug between two hands and looked at him over the rim.
He took a sip of the coffee and let the blistering liquid burn down his throat. “She told me she left Dalton, that she’d found a special opportunity she wanted to explore. I thought she meant Carris” —he shook his head— “and I offered her the COO position.” Zale’s chest tightened. He hadn’t been able to get through to her after that, and the hurt that radiated in her eyes haunted him.
His mother groaned and touched her hand to her temple. “The special opportunity had nothing to do with her career did it? You and Mila. That’s what she was referring to. I know I’m right. The way she looked at you, it was with pride and love. Oh, honey, she probably thought you only wanted her to further your brand.”
“She would have made Carris soar.” He shook his head. “I’ve never met someone so strong in their beliefs, so courageous and driven. We bring out the best in each other. Falling for her was never part of the plan.” He’d been over the moon to hear she’d resigned from Dalton, proud of her strength. Asking her to join him had seemed like the natural next step. Yes, she was brilliant and would succeed in the position, but he wanted her by his side, too. He didn’t just need her in the business aspect of his life, he need her in all aspects of it. Why had it taken her leaving to acknowledge what was in his heart? He loved her whether she was here or in New York.
" How do I know if I convince her to come back, she won't take off when things get choppy? Mila needs stability. I don't want someone flitting in and out of her life." He glanced down at his twined hands, then back up.
“You don’t know.” She patted his cheek. “But with no risk, there’s no reward. Gemma feels used. And it sounds like you indicated that a relationship wasn’t what you wanted, honey. Maybe she just wants to be a woman for once, not the capable business professional.”
Zale pinched the bridge of his nose, and his stomach churned with the acidic coffee. He’d spent so much time convincing himself that a relationship wouldn’t work that he hadn’t accepted the feelings that were already in his heart. He loved her like he’d never loved a woman before. He knew she was meant to be a part of their family, and he had a difficult time imagining the future without her. He’d made it seem like his business decisions took priority over his feelings for her. In fact, he’d never even hinted of deeper emotions beyond their short physical relationship.
His mother stood up. “It’s your decision. Just let me know if you’d like me to watch Mila.”
How could he convince Gemma that he loved her? Nothing could guarantee she wouldn’t leave him, but he was willing to take that risk. Ready to put his trust in her. Gemma had never had any cheerleaders before, no champion to fight for her. She’d once told him she’d never had a place to call home, not four walls to shelter her, but the sense of belonging and love that every child should have. He could give her that, wanted to show her the brightness and fulfillment of having a loving family. These two weeks with her had changed him irrevocably and he was ready to fight for the life they could have together.
“I know what I need to do.” He was ready to jump into action, but there were a few things he needed to attend to. His mother grinned widely and gave him a hug.
“Go get your girl,” she said.
And he planned to.
Chapter 17
Gemma stared out the window of her high-rise, through thick droplets of rain that trailed down the glass pane. The streets below were peppered with umbrellas as pedestrians, cars, and bicycles fought for a place along the congested roadway. When she'd first arrived home and opened her apartment door, she was choked by the emptiness of it. She'd lived in this unit for years and had never really made it home. It was an extension of her business space with monochromatic tones and barely any photographs. Everything was polished and placed just so, nothing like Zale's apartment with Mila where there was always a toy sticking out of the cushions or homework on the dining room table. There, pictures representing love and family lined the wall. The back of her eyelids burned, and she grabbed a tissue. After the last week and a half, she should own stock options with Kleenex.
Each time she thought of Zale and Mila, she welled up and the ache in her chest intensified. Her throat was so tight, she could barely swallow, and she couldn’t recall the last time she’d eaten. Although she’d ignored calls from her parents, she did listen to the messages. They all asked why she left Dalton and if she’d reconsider. None of them had asked her how she was and if she was okay. It stung to know her feelings weren’t a priority for them. Zale had made her feel differently. For the first time, her voice had really been heard, and her feelings nurtured. Until he asked her to join his staff and not his family. Maybe it had been too soon for him, and maybe she’d been so desperate to be loved she didn’t notice the warning signs that would’ve told her he was after her as a team member.
Her grandfather had surprised her, though, restoring some of her faith in the people who raised her. He’d left a message saying that he was ashamed of his actions and lack of spine when it came to standing up to the board. He was going enact the changes she’d proposed to give the employees better benefits. At least she’d accomplished something.
She sighed and pulled the throw blanket off the back of the couch, bringing it up to her chin. The steamy July weather didn’t erase the chill that had settled over her bones. Gemma’s eyelids drooped, even as she fought to stay awake. In dreams of Zale and Mila, she only found more pain. All she’d ever wanted was to have a family of her own, one where love and affection were never difficult to find. She’d gladly trade all her wealth to
snuggle into caring arms at the end of the day.
The shrill tone of her landline had her sitting upright. No one called that phone unless it was the building's concierge. She untucked her legs from the blanket, reluctantly stood up, and walked to the kitchen where the phone was hanging.
“Hello?” Her voice was raw and scratchy from crying.
“Ms. Dalton, you have a rather large delivery here from Martha’s Vineyard. May I send it up?”
“Of course,” she choked out. The soreness in her throat and lungs intensified as she placed the phone back on the receiver. It was silly to think Zale would send her something—just wishful thinking on her part. He only thought of her as a potential employee, after all, and had told her honestly that he wasn’t looking for a relationship. No, it was much more likely that she’d left something behind and the front desk had shipped it out to her.
There was a knock at the door, and she padded down to the foyer to answer. Gemma unlatched the lock and took a step back. There were several delivery men outside the door, arms filled with bundles of flowers.
“You must be planting quite the garden.” The first man chuckled and stepped inside when she gestured for him to enter. They filtered in one by one, placing their heavy loads on the floor.
“If we could leave the door propped open, it will just take us a few more trips,” the man said.
Her jaw must've gaped because he laughed again. They filtered out of the apartment and back in several more times with armfuls of flowers—and not just any arrangement from a local florist. These were perennials from a greenhouse. Her heart thumped in her chest, and her mouth went dry as she stared at the assortment of yellow stargrass, black-eyed Susans, and lupines housed in ordinary, soil-filled pots just waiting to be planted. Just like the ones that roamed wild over the island and spread their roots at the resort.
SEDUCTION AT THE STARGRASS Page 14
