by Karen Sunde
You don't like them.
Lili: I never say that. Should you listen to me?
Joan: Well, you said...
Lili: I know you’re comrades, but come clean – did you never want one of them...a little closer?
Joan: You’re asking if I'm a virgin?
Lili: Darling, I know you're a virgin. It's what you call yourself. La Pucelle. Would you lie? You haven't even got Mary's motivation – "I swear, Joseph, I was alone the whole time."
(Joan pulls away, angry)
Lili: Sorry. I take it back! But haven’t you ever been sweet on someone?
Joan: Even if I had...
Lili: These priests tell you to be a eunuch! You think that's what God wants?
Joan: God needs me for a soldier! What kind of soldier could I be, if...
Lili: If you were a whole woman?
Joan: I have to sleep beside soldiers. If they have thoughts of me...as a woman, I'd lose my power.
Lili: Your power.
Joan: It has a power.
Lili: "Purity?"
Joan: My possession of myself.
Lili: Denial of yourself.
Joan: My not belonging to a man has power.
Lili: You think if you slept with a man, no man would follow you?
Joan: It's a vow I made! For my mission. When my mission is done...
Lili: You can live for you?
(Joan doesn't answer, but gazes away from Lili)
Lili: (Almost whispering) Joan...do you believe in love?
Joan: (Smiles) It's the closest thing to God.
Lili: I mean between a man and woman.
Joan: In love they become like God. They create life.
Lili: What if a woman loves a priest.
Joan: (Pause) St Margaret's priest was married.
Lili: What if the priest is afraid.
Joan: He'll trust his heart to tell him the plan. All of God's plan is holy.
Lili: (Beat) But then your bleeding...
Joan: (Confused) ...is a sign of sin.
Lili: Oh, Lord...
Joan: When I hadn't bled yet, I thought...it was because I was chosen.
Lili: You are! It’s a miracle sign – that someone soft enough to milk a baby...is also strong enough to save her entire country.
(Joan melts, clouding with emotion; Lili holds her)
Lili: So how about we celebrate...that.
(Several priests hustle towards them, including Felipe. They come crowding into the cell to look Joan over)
Lili: Well, well. Here come more celibates to celebrate. Bet they ain’t ready for your news.
(Joan goes to her knees while the priests stand tsk-tsking, shaking their heads. Young Tomas, is behind the others)
Father Superior: You call yourself La Pucelle?
Joan: Yes, Father. Please give me blessing.
Fathers: (Hissed, among themselves) We have nothing to do with virgins. There may not be a female, not even a nun, but only men may be with men.
Joan: (Her hands press her belly) Please, holy Fathers, I have need of the help of a woman.
(The Fathers all stare at her blankly)
Joan: Could you send a woman to see me?
Father Superior: There are no women here.
Father Inferior: (Hastily flicked) We shun them. They have excessive water, few brains, fewer morals.
Felipe: It's in their name "Femina."
Father Inferior: "Fe" meaning faith, but "minus" meaning less.
Father Superior: Femina – a person of less faith – is woman.
Felipe: A lower species than man.
Father Superior: You are wearing men's clothing...
Joan: Yes.
Father Superior: ...which is punishable by death.
Lili: By death?
Joan: I'm wearing it since I am God's soldier.
Father Superior: Who appointed you?
Joan: Please...I'm only a girl.
Father Superior: Precisely. Who appointed you God's soldier? Whose permission did you obtain?
Joan: I don't know how to answer your law.
Father Superior: Did you ask your parish priest?
Joan: Good father, when an angel appears to me, must I ask the priest's permission to see him?
Father Superior: (Shocked) Insubordination...
Joan: And how can the priest advise me if he hasn't seen the angel?
Father Superior: Unbearable pride.
(Murmurs and jottings down among the priests, repeating what she's said)
Father Superior: Have you more to say?
Joan: (Flustered) Please, Father: why would an angel come to me, if he weren't sure I could see him, and hear him, and do his bidding myself.
Father Superior: I believe we've heard more than enough. Fathers?
(Murmurs of ascent. They begin to crowd out)
Joan: Don't leave me alone!
(Father Superior stops. Joan stares at him, grips her belly in terrible confusion, decides to appeal to God)
Joan: Please God! Though I'm unclean...I need to confess!
Father Superior: (Beat, eyeing her shrewdly) Prepare to confess, and be judged.
Joan: Then may I take communion? May I go to mass?
Father Superior: Will you dress as a proper woman?
Joan: I cannot, until my work is done.
Father Superior: Again, you answer yourself.
(Father Superior moves out, joining others who still crowd the door, staring in at her)
Joan: But maybe...
Father Superior: (Archly) Maybe?!
Joan: Maybe I could wear a skirt for mass, and then dress again as a soldier?
Father Superior: Do not mock the Holy Church!
(He slams the cell door. Joan cries after him. Only Tomas remains, unseen, in shadow)
Joan: Father!
Lili: No! Don't call him.
(Joan stands straight, silent, still gripping her belly. Lili is hoarse, gasping, as though the encounter gave her a physical beating)
Lili: (Rasping) You can't dress for them. I see their hate. Why? What have you done to them?
Joan: (Tight, clinging to herself) They're holy men who obey God's laws.
Lili: Joan, you have to be careful. This is more dangerous than the battlefield.
Joan: (Quiet, trying to meditate) No, it's me. Power has made me dangerous. I'm the enemy.
Lili: No you're not!
Joan: (Sadly) It doesn't make sense anymore.
Lili: You can't trust them, Joan! They want you to hate yourself.
Joan: (Beat. Simply) Why did God ask a woman to do this?
Lili: (Looks at her. Pause) Do you want me to leave?
Joan: No. I'm very lonely now. (Beat) You're going to betray me.
(As Lili is alarmed by Joan's words, Tomas moves into a ghostly light ray)
Lili: No...(Seeing Tomas, freezes) What are you doing here?
Tomas: I've always been with you. You know that. (He looks at Joan)
Lili: We don't need you.
Tomas: (Gently) Joan...
Lili: Leave her alone!
Tomas: Joan...
Lili: You're not worthy to touch her. You touched me, then left.
Tomas: I need forgiveness.
Lili: Something's very wrong with you. Look at me!
Tomas: (Avoiding her) I disobeyed.
Lili: Disobeyed what? The law to hate women?
Tomas: The law to not touch them.
Lili: The law to not love them.
Tomas: No. The law is love.
Lili: How can you love? You don't know what it is!
Tomas: (Looking at Joan) I can love her.
Lili: Because she's a saint? Then why do your brothers hate her?
Tomas: She needs my ministry.
Lili: You're not qualified. You're sick. You'll destroy wha
t you touch.
Tomas: Joan...I'm worried for you.
Lili: Don't listen, Joan.
Tomas: Please look at me. Please don't despair.
Lili: You can't trust him.
(Joan is raising her head)
Tomas: That's it. Look up.
Lili: No matter if he's young, and kind, and seems to understand...he can't!
Joan: Will you confess me, Father?
Tomas: Of course I will.
Joan: Oh thank you!
Tomas: But you must be careful, Joan.
(Joan kneels, her head bowed)
Lili: He belongs to the Fathers, Joan. If you trust him, you're theirs!
Joan: (Fastening happily on Tomas) But you will confess me? And you'll say mass for me?
Tomas: The charges against you are serious.
Joan: (Beginning confession) Forgive me, Father...
Tomas: Joan, please listen.
Joan: ...for I have sinned.
(Tomas is troubled, but acquiesces, assuming a formal position)
Tomas: How long since your last confession.
Lili: Please don't, Joan...
Joan: I think...a whole day, Father. And in that time...I deserted my post.
Tomas: Were you doing bad things, my child?
Joan: Oh no, I was doing God's will.
Tomas: Did you hurt anyone?
Joan: No...
Tomas: But you led soldiers.
Joan: To save their country, only.
Tomas: Joan. You've been responsible for many deaths.
Joan: They should have gone back to the country that's theirs.
Tomas: What powers have you used?
Joan: The power given me by God.
Tomas: Did you ever dance with fairies?
Lili: He's their spy, Joan! Don't answer.
Joan: (Angrily, erupting at Lili) Go away! I need God's light!
(Lili staggers, hurt by Joan's sharp rejection)
Joan: (To Tomas) The fairies teach life's joy.
Tomas: Dear child of God...the Fathers will examine you first...for virginity.
Lili: (Weakened) No...
Joan: (Frightened) What?
Lili: (Rising, steely) They want to see if you got your power by sleeping with the devil.
(She moves behind Tomas, who's leaning earnestly toward Joan)
Joan: No!
Tomas: I'll be with you. Try not to be frightened.
Lili: (Putting a hand on Tomas' shoulder) Will you?
(Tomas responds, turning his head)
Lili: How can you be with her or know how she feels? You've sucked poison.
Joan: Father...Father...?
Tomas: I'm here, Joan. I won't leave you.
Joan: (She prays, relaxing) Thank you, Father... Our Father, who art in heaven...
Lili: To you, she and I are the same – white legs for you to split.
(Lili, touching his face, kneels. Tomas, confused, responds to her as her priest)
Tomas: This is a fantasy you've had for a long time?
Lili: (Childlike) Yes, Father. Since I was a girl in confession.
(Lili tells a childlike story – utterly simple, pure, while, transition-less, "under her breath" she also carries on a seduction. Tomas will try to go on conducting the confession, but be drawn irrepressibly into the fantasy she describes. Joan, finding relief in prayer, grows ecstatic)
Lili: (Sultry) I'm a woman.
Tomas: And it still troubles you?
Lili: (Sultry, moves her hands on her body suggestively) Do you understand me?
Tomas: Your...fantasy?
Lili: (Childlike) There was a priest. (Sultry) I'm a woman. What do you want me to do?
Tomas: And you had thoughts of him?
Lili: (Childlike) I knew I was wicked, Father, because he was a priest. (Sultry) What are you thinking of, Father? This? And this?
Tomas: But you...
Lili: (Childlike) But one day, in the park, I was sure he put his hand on me.
Tomas: But he...
Lili: (Childlike) Only lightly, nothing really. (Sultry) You've never had a woman. Have you.
Tomas: And then you dreamed.
Lili: (Childlike) I dreamed we'd meet behind the altar. He'd take me in his arms. (Sultry) You can't touch women.
Tomas: But that wasn't evil,
Lili: (Sultry) But you want to.
Tomas: Dreaming of something isn't the same...
Lili: (Sultry) And that makes you afraid.
Tomas: ..as really going out...
Lili: (Sultry) Does it make me evil?
Tomas: ...and acting...
Lili: (Sultry) Because you're afraid?
Tomas: ...on the dream.
(The Fathers emerge from all panels, and will slowly converge upon and seize the back-in-grace, happily-in-prayer Joan)
Lili: (Childlike, beginning to weep) But I did. I went in after mass...
(Tomas can no longer contain himself, and reaches, as she speaks, toward Lili)
Lili: I went behind the altar, and he was naked.
(Tomas takes hold of Lili, draws her into his arms, kissing her passionately. As she yields – and they swiftly accelerate until they're making love; Joan is being lifted by the priests onto the examination table, while Lili, coming to climax, gets a
