by Quinn Ward
He rounded on me, hands balled into fists at his sides. An exhausted woman near us quickly stubbed out her own cigarette and backed away. Even though smoking was a disgusting habit, I felt bad for disrupting what was most likely a much-needed break from whatever had brought her to the hospital.
"Do you have any clue what it's like to lose faith in two people you thought you knew in a matter of seconds?" he continued. I opened my mouth to interrupt, but he silenced me with a quick shake of his head. "I get that we were never besties or anything, but I really thought you'd be good for Tony. And you are. Were. Whatever. He's calmer and more content than he's ever been, and I'm pretty sure it's because you've shown him what it's like to have someone he can count on. Do you even realize the carnage that you'll leave behind once you get sick of fucking both of them? It'll destroy their relationship. Tony'll never trust Enzo again."
I tried to interrupt again but Frankie silenced me with a single icy glare. I huffed out a breath, figuring my best course of action was to let him get it all out of his system then address each of his issues, hopefully convincing him no one was out to fuck anyone over.
"Is this some game to you? I don't give a fuck if you're one of those guys who figures double the dicks means double the fun, but they're brothers. It takes a special sort of fucked up to get in between a set of twins. You haven't been around their whole lives, so I can't possibly expect you to understand how close they are. This sort of betrayal..."
I couldn't take it any longer. His accusation that I didn't understand the bond between Tony and Enzo cut deep. I swallowed hard, praying the guys would forgive me for any secrets I spilled. I closed the distance between us, squaring my shoulders and looking Frankie in the eye. "That's where you're wrong. You're right, I haven't been there since the day they were born, but don't assume for a minute I'm so dense I don't know them. I see them every fucking day. I'm there with them. And I'm the luckiest son of a bitch in the world because both of them want to be with me. When we're at home, I get to see the real them, shit they don't show anyone else, not even their brothers. You can hate me if that makes you feel better, but before you do, you might want to ask them how they feel about me being with both of them."
"They know?" He blinked rapidly, struck dumb as he tried to wrap his head around the fact I wasn't the cheating bastard he'd pegged me for. It seemed Frankie never considered this might be an open, honest relationship. "How does something like that even happen? You just went up to them one day and suggested you be allowed to fuck around with both of them and they were cool with it?"
"See, that's the funniest part of this entire situation." I chuckled, knowing I was about to blow Frankie's narrow mind. "It wasn't my idea. It was Tony who suggested Enzo and I get to know one another better."
"Maybe he just meant it'd be easier if the two of you were friends. Knowing one another doesn't always mean in a carnal sense," Frankie argued. "Of course he'd want the two of you to get along if he was starting to have feelings for you. All of us have worried about how our partners would mesh with the family."
I snorted, thinking back to that first night. There was no mistaking Tony's intentions, but I didn't want to scar Frankie with the details of what we'd done. What I was piling on him was already going to be tough for him to accept, and even if he believed this wasn't my idea, I wouldn't have him thinking less of Tony and Enzo because they'd finally admitted desires they'd kept hidden for so long.
"Frankie, we could sit out here all day arguing about what I'm doing with your brothers, and it won't make a damn bit of difference. Right now, you need to focus on what really matters, and that's Mama."
"You think I don't fucking know that?" Frankie spat out, narrowing his eyes on me. "Believe me, finding out you're fucking two of my brothers wasn't exactly on my list of things to do today, yet here we are. I think it's for the best if you head home. As you so kindly pointed out, we don't know yet what's going on with Mama, and you're a distraction."
My hands curled into tight fists as I fantasized about knocking Frankie to the ground to help him get his head out of his ass. He hadn't listened to a single word I'd said. I took a few steadying breaths, reminding myself I wouldn't earn any brownie points with any of the Marino boys if the two of us went to blows while they were inside waiting on news about their mother. "Fuck you right to hell and back. If Tony and Enzo tell me they want me to go home, I will. Until then, I'm going to make a quick detour to the cafeteria for food and coffee because it's going to be a long night and none of you will think about taking care of yourselves. After that, I'm going to sit my happy ass down between the two men I'm in love with to make sure they're okay. If you have a problem with that, that's on you."
"Man, I never thought of you as a self-centered prick." Frankie shook his head and let out a huff of annoyance. We both stepped back from the curb as a city bus slowed, and the bus sped up again after the driver realized we weren't waiting for him. "This isn't the time for you to rush in there as some sort of knight in shining armor. If you have any decency at all, please give our family this time."
The hardest part of this conversation, other than worrying Tony and Enzo would be pissed at me for revealing as much about our relationship as I had, was that I knew Frankie and I would never truly recover from the bomb I'd dropped on his world. My shoulders slumped forward as I turned away from him, thinking for a moment he could be right. I didn't want the brothers waging a silent war in the waiting room while they should be focused on Mama. Regardless of what Frankie thought about me, I wasn't going anywhere, so maybe it was best for everyone if I walked away for the time being. Tony and Enzo would be fine; if there was one thing I knew without a shadow of a doubt, it was the Marino family took care of one another. They didn't need me here.
Frankie called out after me as I walked away. A quick wave was the only acknowledgment that I'd heard him. I didn't turn back. I couldn't face him and risk him seeing the seeds of doubt he'd planted flourishing in my mind. Curiosity finally got the better of me and I glanced over my shoulder at the top of the hill to see if Frankie was still watching me in silent judgment. I wasn't sure if the empty sidewalk relieved or annoyed me.
I had no clue how long I'd walked around the perimeter of the hospital trying to figure out what I'd say to Frankie if I rejoined the group and he reiterated his demand I give them time as a family. When the blue sky began to take on the hues of pink and purple seen at dusk, I ducked in the main entrance and navigated the maze of corridors and elevators until I found the cafeteria. I should get back to the emergency room to show Frankie I wasn't going to be scared away by his little big brother outburst, but I couldn't disagree that my presence was a distraction. Since he knew about us, or at least more than any of us had intended to share at this point, the tension in the room would be palpable. I fired off a quick text to Tony letting him know I was grabbing food for everyone then shuffled my way toward the deli case.
"You lost?" I ignored the question because the random stranger behind me didn't need to know about my relationship drama or the sudden case of doubt plaguing me. When a hand landed on my shoulder, I spun around, ready to remind the man attached to the voice that personal space was a real, valuable thing, only to realize it was Levi, the youngest Marino's partner. He backed away quickly, holding up his hands in surrender. "Everything okay? Haven't seen you since you followed Frankie outside, I figured you bailed after he finished delivering his ‘you hurt my brother and I'll kill you’ speech."
"Nah man, it wasn't like that." I waved a hand in the air as if my chat with Frankie hadn't sent me in a downward spiral. The last thing I needed was to blurt out our secret to yet another person without first talking to the guys which was bound to happen if Levi figured out I was hiding something.
"Come on," he scoffed, directing me away from the cold sandwiches to the hot foods line. "I've been where you're at, but it was even worse for me because I dared defile the baby of the family."
"If you say so," I muttered under
my breath. If we were going to compare whose perversion was worse, I'd win hands down. Not only was I fucking two of the brothers, but I could almost bust a nut just watching the two of them together.
"Look, it's not a pissing contest," he scolded me as he pulled two trays off the stand and handed one to me. "What I'm trying to say is I get what it's like to get past the defensive wall known as the Marino brothers. They're crazy protective of one another, but once they see you're here for the long haul, they'll respect you for it. So, the question is, are you going to hide out down here?"
"I wasn't hiding," I argued, focus solely on the hunks of meat floating in some type of gravy rather than risk Levi seeing something in my expression that'd confirm I was lying to him. Seriously, you'd think a hospital would serve food that could actually be identified by sight rather than mass-produced mystery meals.
"Is that why Tony and Enzo have been huddled in the corner for over an hour arguing about whether to give you space or call to find out where in the hell you are when they need you?" They. Shit. Did everyone know now? Levi's long fingers curled around my biceps, urging me forward in the line. "Relax man, the last thing anyone needs is you passing out while they're all busy upstairs."
"Does everyone know?" I asked because I couldn't not know what I'd eventually walk into. I loved Enzo for wanting to give me some time alone because I'd bet my life Tony was the one resisting the urge to blow up my phone and tell me to get my ass back up there, but I didn't want him thinking I'd buckle under pressure. If we were going to make a real go of our relationship, and we were because the alternative made my chest hurt, I had to prove they could trust me to be there when they needed me. Like now.
"I don't think so," he reassured me. "I didn't know you were seeing both of them until today, and I only found out because Matteo fell asleep on my shoulder and I had nothing better to do than observe. People watching is a hazard of the job, I suppose. I'm constantly framing shots in my mind, trying to see what most wouldn't. Do you want to know what I saw today?"
Would it be rude to tell him I wasn't sure I did want to know? Probably. Did I want to hear his observations? No. Yes. Probably not, but it'd drive me batshit if he didn't tell me. "Sure."
"I saw two men desperately in need of the man they love. They're scared and confused right now, and you're their foundation. What they have can't survive without you." Was he saying what I thought he was? Shit. At the rate we were going, the secrets we'd so carefully guarded would be out in the open by the end of the day and Mama would wake up to find her family in turmoil. Levi didn't say anything else for a while, watching me as he allowed me to absorb his words. I needed him to clarify his statement because the longer the silence dragged on between us the harder it was to draw in a breath. My heart raced, pumping fear and anxiety through my body. Levi's expression softened as he placed his hand on my forearm.
Someone cleared their throat. A very impatient cashier with pursed lips glared at us, hand out waiting for my money.
"I've got both of our meals," Levi told her.
"You don't have to do that," I argued.
"I don't care who's paying for this date as long as someone pays," she chided as she mashed the buttons on her register.
"Oh, we're not—"
Levi cut me off, giving me a gentle shove out of the line. "Sorry ma'am, it's been a long day."
Once Levi settled up for our food, he led me to a table near the windows. "I'm sorry if I overstepped back there or if I was way off base."
He was giving me an opening. Something about his easygoing personality told me I could dispute his assumptions and he'd let the subject drop. But for how long? And he didn't seem disgusted by what he thought was going on between us, which was far better than the reaction I'd gotten from Frankie earlier. Maybe Levi could be an ally; he could help us show the family it wasn't wrong for me to love both Tony and Enzo.
"None of us meant for it to happen," I admitted. I pushed the noodles and meat around on my plate, knowing my stomach would rebel if I tried eating anything. "It was supposed to be a night of fun."
"Makes sense." When I gaped at Levi, eyes practically bugging out of my head, he shrugged. "What? They're both sexy as hell and it's not uncommon for people to have fantasies about being with twins. But that's not how it turned out for the three of you, is it?" I shook my head, unable to form words. "Listen, I won't push you to divulge what goes on behind closed doors. It doesn't matter, and it's no one's business but your own. But I do think you need to be honest with the family. The longer you keep it a secret, the harder it'll be to win their trust when the truth comes out."
"But what if..." My words fell off, not sure what I wanted to ask.
"I'm not saying you need to tell them everything. I get why none of you are ready for that." I swallowed hard, heart beating even faster, certain now he had put all the pieces together. "The world is a judgmental place, and there will be people who think what the three of you are doing is wrong, but I have to believe if you control how much they know, they'll see the three of you are meant to be together. I see it, and I know Matteo does as well. He doesn't fully understand, but he's commented several times about how much happier his brothers are since you entered the picture. At the end of the day, that's what the Marino family is all about."
"I'll talk to them about it," I promised because I wasn't going to march in there and declare my love and devotion while they waited for news about their mama. However we proceeded, it had to be done as a unit.
Levi motioned to my plate before he started eating. I barely tasted the food but kept eating, knowing I'd need the energy to make it through the emotional strain we'd all face today. Once our plates were empty, I followed Levi through the cafeteria line again. He grabbed an assortment of cold foods and sent me off to get coffee for everyone.
As we waited for the elevator, he offered one final piece of advice. "For now, go into that waiting room. Love them. Show them you're not easily scared away. Let the brothers see you're willing to do whatever it takes to care for Tony and Enzo, regardless of what anyone else thinks."
"Okay." Levi made it sound simple. I'd try, knowing without him saying as much we'd have his support if the shit hit the fan.
Chapter Sixteen
Tony
Once all the brothers were present and accounted for, it was like my body just shut down. I didn't want to punk out, but I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep my eyes open. No one thought it was unusual for me to rest my head on Enzo's shoulder; that was the benefit of having always shared a close bond our brothers never quite understood. Enzo tensed at my nearness. I patted his knee.
"If you keep doing that, they're going to think you're upset with me," I warned him, whispering softly enough only Enzo could hear me, wishing I could say more.
I felt him nod before settling into the corner of the rock-hard couch. I burrowed my way deeper into his side and closed my eyes. Just for a minute or two. I was exhausted following the adrenaline rush and crash. While I was glad I was there when Mama needed me, it was an experience I hoped to never have to live through again.
I drifted in and out, catching snippets of conversation but nothing that made sense. I relaxed, knowing someone would wake me when there was news about Mama's condition. Eventually, Enzo slid his arm around my shoulders, drawing me deeper into his warmth. I was vaguely aware of my surroundings when I turned my head, burrowing my face into the crook of Enzo's neck. He went rigid as a board, nudging me away from him, snapping me back to reality.
Oh fuck.
Someone laughed. I closed my eyes tighter, as if that'd keep me from utter humiliation.
"Tony must be having one hell of a dream over there," Matteo quipped. "Doesn't even realize he's making out with Enzo. This has serious blackmail potential down the road."
"You'll do no such thing." I wasn't into the Daddy Dom thing like Matteo, but even I could admit it was hot to hear Levi get all growly. You know, as long as I ignored the fact he was screwing my ba
by brother. "Hand me your phone."
There were pictures? Seriously? That was low. Okay, so I'd have likely done the same had roles been reversed.
"It's just one picture," Matteo whined. "Can I keep it if I promise I won't use it with evil intent? They really were cute cuddled up on the couch together."
"No."
Matteo let out a huff. "Fine. You never let me have fun."
"That's me, Captain Buzzkill," Levi deadpanned. "Now, unless you want a red ass when we get home, I suggest you do as you were told."
I pursed my lips to keep from laughing. When I finally opened my eyes, I noticed Max lingering at the edge of the room, hands filled with a tray of drinks. He glanced around the room, eyes stopping briefly on each member of the family. He shuffled his feet, but never stepped towards us. I wasn't sure I'd ever seen him look so uncertain.
I cocked my head toward the other side of the couch. It'd be cramped with the three of us, but I needed one thing in my life to feel right. Or as right as it could when we were still keeping a huge secret from everyone who loved us. The only regret I had about falling in love with Enzo and Max was there wouldn't ever be a time my brothers fully understood it wasn't just Max who completed me, it was both of them. Instead of joining us, he shook his head, so slightly I was sure no one else noticed. His steps as he distributed coffee and water to everyone in our group were stilted as though he had to force himself to keep from running again.
When he tried the impersonal approach with Enzo, I dug my fingers into his wrist, nearly causing him to dump the lone remaining coffee into my lap. "What's going on?"
"Don't worry about it." He stared blankly somewhere above my head. Max tried to jerk his hand free, which pissed me off. I dug my fingernails into his skin. Finally, our eyes met. Enzo pushed me upright, leaning in to brush his fingers over the back of Max's hand.
