by C. R. Jane
School officials were still interviewing me when drunken girls started to file back into the dorm, laughing and giggling as they stumbled to their rooms. They'd just missed the snake. I wonder how their drunken minds would have handled that sight.
Animal control had found it pretty quickly. It hadn't been poisonous—they assured me of that—but I'd caught a glimpse of it in the cage they'd brought as they carried it away and it seemed even bigger somehow.
Ms. Todd, the school official in charge of the dorm, grilled me on details of what had happened, and she seemed frustrated with me when I couldn't provide very many. "Is there anyone that would have an issue with you at this school?" she asked. "You did just start yesterday, did you not?"
I opened my mouth to say no, beyond the usual students who would hate me when they found out about my dad, but then I snapped it close as an image of Jackson's face darted through my mind.
The feet had definitely been too small for Jackson, but what if…
No. He wouldn't do that to me. Jackson had actually saved me from snakes when we were little. There would be no way that he would do something like that now, even with how much he seemed to hate me.
"I don't think so," I finally answered, feeling unsure for the first time about if I knew Jackson Parker at all. As it turned out, I hadn't really known his brother. Did the same thing apply to Jackson?
After Ms. Todd finally left, I locked the door once again, replaced the chair under the knob and crawled into bed. I left the lights blaring. I knew I wasn't going to sleep tonight.
Snakes.
Someone had it out for me. And I just hoped it wasn't him.
CHAPTER SEVEN
THEN
It had been a long time since I'd had a birthday party. I remembered when I was little, my father would throw lavish parties to show off all our wealth. One time, I had a whole fucking petting zoo set up on the front lawn of our mansion.
But that was before.
Since the year my father put a bullet in his brain, I'd never had another party. In fact, my mother had gone out of her way to ignore it. Like somehow my birth, instead of her and my father's greed had been the precipice in bringing about our family's downfall.
Once the twins had come into my life, there had been private celebrations that always included my favorite chocolate chip cupcake from the local bakery and a solitary candle that I blew out at midnight, but there had never been a party. Especially like this.
The twin's sixteenth birthday party. They'd been talking about plans for it for months, but it was one thing to hear about it and another to see it.
I looked through the gate at the chaos that had already started. I'd just ridden my bike to the party. Jackson and Caiden had offered to come pick me up, but I'd lied and told them my mom could give me a ride, not wanting them to be inconvenienced with me on the day of their party.
But now I wished I'd accepted their offer, since the bike ride had left me a sweaty mess. School would be out soon, and summer was already trying to rear its head. I slipped through the gate that led into the massive few acres of property that made up the twin's backyard and used my key to slink my way into the pool house to try and make myself less like a pile of melted ice cream.
I fidgeted with the red bikini that I'd found at the thrift shop the other day. I'd heard people say that it was gross to wear someone else's bathing suit, but I'd figured the two times I'd sent it through the wash had gotten rid of any germs in it. And besides, it looked really good on me. I'd finally started to get some curves over the school year, and my flat chest had settled into a B cup. My hips and ass had started to come in as well...which meant that my clothes no longer fit. When I'd asked for more clothes for school, my mom had just told me that I was getting fat and I should get on a diet because she wouldn't be getting me new clothes. Since I didn't have any money, the fact that my curves had come in had been really noticeable this year, since all my clothes were skintight.
Well, noticeable to everyone but them.
Taking a deep breath, I threw on my simple black cover-up and stuffed the rest of my sweaty clothes in the corner of the room. Then I stepped back out of the pool house, making sure to lock the room behind me. The twins wanted their main hangout area in the pool house to stay locked and for everyone to use the main pool house bathroom that had an entrance on the other side. I was the only person they trusted with a key, and even after all these years of being best friends with them, it still made me feel special.
I tried to hold my head up high as I stepped into the sights of the other partygoers. The twin's pool was massive with several slides, two hot tubs, and a full on rock grotto. Pool chairs were set up everywhere, and almost all of them were filled already. A massive slip and slide was set up on the hill behind the pool, and there was even a DJ cranking out tunes on the other side of the pool. Several tables were set up with catered food featuring all of the twin's favorites, and judging by all the people carrying around red solo cups, I was sure there was alcohol around here somewhere.
I looked around surreptitiously for the twins, trying not to look like I cared about all the stares I was getting. I was tolerated at this point. Everyone knew better than to call me anything in front of the guys. But I was a sitting duck right now without them around.
A throaty laugh caught my attention, and I caught sight of Veronica Hollingsworth trying to wrap herself around Jackson. He was ignoring her as he talked to Caiden and one of the other football players, but it was still hard to see her touching him. I'd heard the rumors. Jackson Parker got around, and Veronica was one of his frequent playmates.
Caiden had his own set of groupies who hung on his every word, but I caught his eye as I stood there awkwardly, and he immediately ditched them to jog over to me. His sunny smile almost took my breath away. They'd always been good-looking. But when you were a little kid, you cared more if someone was nice to you than what they looked like. He and Jackson had both gotten so hot that sometimes I couldn't look right at them. I had to focus on one characteristic on their face so that I didn't get overwhelmed and could carry on a normal conversation with them.
"LyLy, my girl," he said, immediately pressing a kiss to the side of my head, and he gave me a hug. My heart raced being up against him. He pressed his six-pack against my arm, and it should have been fucking illegal for a sixteen-year-old to have that good of a body. Between his dark hair, his tan skin, and his yellow swim trunks that were hanging dangerously low, I was in danger of passing out.
I tried not to make it super obvious how worked up I was when I gently pushed away from him.
"Happy birthday," I said softly, looking up at the face I had memorized. Both the twins were already pushing six foot three, towering over my measly five foot six form and it was just another thing about them that made me feel protected.
"You're late," he commented, gesturing to the craziness around me. Three members of the football team had just thrown in some of the popular girls and they were pretending to shriek at the water temperature, even though the twins kept the pool at a perfect eighty degrees year-round.
"I noticed," I commented, looking around as well. My gaze got caught on Jackson's, suddenly. He was still on the other side of the pool, Veronica wrapped around him, half the football team trying to get his attention. The sight of him, so intent and staring right at me, pushed all the air out of my lungs.
"Jackson's holding court," Caiden commented sarcastically, even though he'd been doing the same thing before he saw me. Popularity was effortless for the twins, even if they had me bringing them down.
I pried my eyes away from Jackson's, unable to deal with the way that he stared at me.
"Let's go swimming," urged Caiden, swooping me into his arms and pretending to run towards the pool. I shrieked, the same way I'd just been mocking those other girls for doing. He stopped right at the edge and gave me a dark smile. "Want to take your cover-up off first?" he asked, and I nodded shyly, my heart beating out of rhythm at the th
ought of showing so much skin in front of half the school.
"You're safe for now," he said with a laugh, setting me down. "Move," he ordered a guy from my class, Trevor I think was his name, who happened to be set up on a pool chair nearest to where we were standing.
I snorted when Trevor immediately got up like someone had lit a fire underneath him, and Trevor shot me a dirty look as he passed by me. I walked over to the chair, took a deep breath, and then tore off my safety net. I heard a small intake of breath behind me, but when I whirled around to look at where it had come from, it was just Caiden standing there with a blank face. For a moment, I thought I caught sparks of hunger in his eyes as he traced the shape of my body from head to toe, but whatever the look was, it was gone in a moment.
"Pool time," grinned Caiden. And before I could blink, he'd grabbed me and jumped into the pool with me in his arms. I sputtered as I swallowed some water. The near drowning wasn't enough to distract me from the fact that Caiden's right hand had just stroked my side, perilously close to my right boob. He lingered there for a second, and I temporarily forgot to breathe. After what seemed like an hour, but was probably only a minute, he wrapped both arms around me again and set his chin on top of my head. I looked up and caught Jackson staring at me again.
I knew he'd look at me again, and I'd prepared myself for the racing heart and ragged breathing. I was ready for one of his signature winks that he'd always given me, and for the flames that would burn up my cheeks as they always did when our gazes locked lately.
But I didn't know it would hurt.
I couldn't plan ahead for the ache that lived in my chest when he didn't acknowledge my wave. I hadn't thought to be thankful for an empty stomach, courtesy of my mother drinking away our grocery budget this month, until it flipped when his gaze flicked to Caiden wrapped around me. His jaw clenched as tight as the fists by his sides.
I didn't know how empty I'd feel when he glared at my lips and my mouthed hello, but then ignored it and turned back to his conversation with his team, this time making sure to add Veronica to the mix.
Okay… I almost got hit by a volleyball that had just been tossed over the net set up in the middle of the pool as that one minute with me here and Jackson all the way over there rolled on replay. I wasn’t sure what I’d done, or what had changed since I spoke to him on the phone the night before, other than everything. I hide my hurt by pretending to play volleyball with Caiden and berated myself for the absurdity of it. I should be used to Jackson's moods by now. Except Jackson had never ignored me.
The rest of the day passed similarly, and I was ready to leave early, even though I'd been anticipating this day for months. Caiden got me some of the alcoholic punch that had been making the rounds, and I sipped it as I watched Jackson out of the corner of my eye. Caiden had wrapped himself around me all day. Even now, when he was talking to some of his friends, his arm was casually draped around my waist. The twins had always been touchy-feely, but I wasn’t quite sure what to make of how either of them were acting today.
The sun had started to set before the twin's staff brought out an enormous three-tiered cake. I sang along with everyone else as they basked in the attention of their adoring classmates. Jackson even managed to crack a rare smile as they both blew out the sixteen candles in tandem. Booze was immediately brought out, and the DJ changed the songs from the sun-soaked playlist that had been blasting all day to songs that would better fit a club.
Caiden looked around, probably to drag me on the dance floor, but I slipped away before he spotted me, running to hide in the locked pool house bedroom where no one would be able to find me.
Sometimes, crowds could get...overwhelming for me. Caiden could never understand that. He lived for the limelight. Jackson and I were alike that way though. Although Jackson was popular, he could only handle small doses of crowds before he started to get twitchy. And when he started to descend into one of his depressive episodes...then he really hated crowds. The only time Caiden and Jackson were alike socially was when Jackson was in his "black" moods. Then Jackson was up for anything.
I called it black because Jackson was one of the rare cases where his actual eye color changed if he was becoming manic. It had become a habit of mine over the years to always look at eyes to assess his moods.
I didn't know why I thought about that now.
Maybe I was trying to blame how he'd treated me all day on an impending episode. That would probably make me feel better.
I sank into one of the squishy armchairs in the room and sighed as I pulled out my phone to start reading. I could readily admit at that moment how socially awkward I sometimes was.
Just then, the handle on the door started moving and a key turned in the lock. A second later, Jackson came in.
He hadn't seen me—my chair was hidden in the corner behind a plant on the wall behind the door. He closed the door and leaned against it, not bothering to look around the room. He scrubbed his hands over his face and sighed. "Fuck," he muttered.
For some reason, I didn't want to announce my presence. It was rare that I got to observe Jackson in such a way. He always had his walls up. Being bipolar only made him more disciplined, afraid to ever let go since he didn't have much control over himself during his "black" episodes.
He pulled out his phone, and his thumb hovered on my contact information. After a second of indecision, he started typing out a text. I quickly silenced my phone. At this point, I felt like an idiot that I hadn't announced myself, and I wasn't going to do it now.
A few seconds later, a text came through my phone.
Where are you?
I didn't answer, not knowing what to say, at least right now. I'd gladly answer when he was out of here and I didn't stand the chance of looking like the biggest idiot in the world.
He stood there for a long moment, waiting for my answer. When I didn't send one, he cursed again and then opened the door and went back outside. I sank back in my chair, adrenaline coursing through me over what had just happened. What was his problem tonight? What was my problem tonight?
After giving Jackson a five-minute head start, so I at least stood the chance of him not seeing me, I went back outside to the party that had morphed into a rager while I'd been inside. I locked the door behind me, took a deep breath, and stepped out from behind the palm trees that shielded the entrance.
I found Caiden right away, dancing in a big group. He looked around the dance floor every couple of minutes, and I knew he was looking for me. I stayed in the shadows so he wouldn't see me, not really understanding why I wanted to hide from him. I looked around for Jackson, but he was nowhere in sight.
Suddenly, a familiar set of hands gripped my waist, and I was tugged back against Jackson's chest.
I basked for an instant in his embrace; the heat radiating from him to me fracturing my heart into scattered palpitations. A low rumble vibrated between us as his fingers dug into my hips. "Where were you hiding, little angel?"
His breath was rough—it was, I felt it—but then he pushed me gently away. It seemed like I had imagined it when I turned to find he was raking his hand through his hair from root to tip, jaw tense.
"I just needed a break," I whispered, my voice coming out low and throaty from whatever this was between us right now.
He looked me over, getting stuck on my lips and then my hair. His gaze landed on my eyes, and a struggle rolled around in his blue storm. But he shook his head as if to free himself from confusion.
"Want to dance?" he asked, a wicked glint in his eye as he stretched out his hand towards me. I hesitated for a moment. Danger lingered in his question.
And then, like always when it came to Jackson Parker, I leaped.
I took his outstretched hand and stared at our connection. His grip was warm, firm, and electric, very much like his eyes that drew me in. He led me to the dance floor, and it said a lot for the spell I was under that I was only faintly aware of the gazes tracking our every move.
"
Jackson," called out Caiden, who had just spotted us. He motioned for us to join him, but Jackson waved him away and pulled me close to him.
The song changed just then to “Past Life” by Trevor Daniel and I sank into Jackson's embrace. The music twirled like thread around us. I rested my head against his chest, and let him lead me in a wicked, slow dance that didn't match the tempo of the song at all. Closing my eyes, I soaked in the feel of him.
The song ended, and I opened my eyes, only to realize that Jackson had maneuvered us away from the crowd again. We were on the edge of the dance floor. We continued to move slowly as the song switched to “One Thing Right” by Marshmello.
He stopped suddenly and stared at me with those fathomless blue eyes. I could've sworn in that moment that the whole universe was reflected in those depths.
"Everly," he breathed into the silence, my name a prayer on his lips. His eyes slowly started to close, and then he leaned in, so his mouth hovered over mine, not touching, just taking. It was so intimate. More intimate than anything I'd ever experienced in my life. But I wanted to kiss him.
"Jackson," I whispered, and the word broke the spell.
When his eyes opened, a devilish gleam replaced the adoration that had been in his gaze before. He smiled, a slow, beguiling grin, as I writhed against his dark stare and the attention he gave me.
"Do you want this, little angel? Tell me you need this as much as I do." I was speechless as he leaned forward and pressed the barest hint of a kiss against my lips. I'd only been kissed once before, by his brother, in fact. It was a kiss done under the bleachers that we never spoke of again.
But this…
This was a kiss.
Every kiss in my life had been practice for this one, and each kiss thereafter would have this one to live up to. I sank deeply and desperately into his arms, lost in the unfamiliarity of being found.
