by Cat Cahill
She needed to speak with her brother.
She entered the lobby, uncertain where to find him. The spacious room bustled with activity, but one thing drew Elizabeth’s eyes—the tree. It sparkled from top to bottom with lit candles. Ribbon cascaded down in curled lengths. Paper ornaments and chains of popped corn were draped around its boughs. And at the top, where Landon had placed it, the tin star sparkled in the candlelight.
It was absolutely beautiful.
“Do you like it?” Penny arrived at Elizabeth’s side.
“I . . . I love it! When did you have time to do this?” Elizabeth couldn’t take her eyes from the tree.
“The girls and I had plenty of time while you were keeping vigil by Mr. Cooper’s side.”
Elizabeth’s face grew warm. How many other people had noticed how much time she’d spent with Landon? She hoped Mrs. Ruby saw it as simple Christian charity and nothing more. She hadn’t asked Elizabeth to take her usual place in the lunch counter, and Genia had stopped by to inform her that Mrs. Ruby had excused her from her duties while she nursed Mr. Cooper.
She looked at Penny now. Her friend was smiling, more vibrant than she’d appeared in days. “How is Sheriff Young?”
“He’s well. I’m just so happy he’s here and we can be married.” Penny’s smile was as bright as the candles on the tree. “I’ve heard your Mr. Cooper is recovering nicely.”
“He’s stirred a few times, but hasn’t awoken yet. Soon, I hope. If you’ll forgive me, I must find my brother.”
“The last I saw him, he was finishing dinner with Emma.” Penny gestured at the dining room.
“Thank you. And thank you again for finishing the tree. It’s lovely.” Elizabeth gave her friend a smile before turning toward the dining room. The door opened just as she stepped forward, and a few guests emerged, including Monroe and Emma.
Elizabeth stopped, unsure again of how or even if she wanted to approach her brother. But Emma spotted her before she could turn and run back to Landon’s room. Emma whispered something into Monroe’s ear, and then walked off toward where Penny still stood near the tree.
“Lizzie?” Monroe said as he moved toward her. “It’s good to see you about. How fares Mr. Cooper?”
“He’s much improved, though not yet awake.” Elizabeth was glad for the small talk, even if it did have to revolve around Landon. “He’s lucky you found him.” Dora had informed her that Monroe had been the one to spot Landon’s horse walking behind him without a rider. He’d returned and found Landon, unconscious in the snow. “He’s alive because of you.”
Her brother shifted, seemingly uncomfortable with the praise. A short moment passed, and Elizabeth was finally able to observe how much he’d changed over the years. He was no longer the boy she’d known. Then again, she was no longer the girl he’d looked after. He gestured at the nearby seating. “Let’s sit.”
Elizabeth shook her head. “I couldn’t. That is, I’m not supposed to.”
Monroe placed his hands on the back of a very comfortable-looking wing chair. “I built this hotel, so I believe I get some degree of authority. And I say that after two straight days of nursing an ill man, you deserve to sit in this chair.”
Elizabeth couldn’t help but smile despite the sick feeling in her stomach. She sat, and hoped Mrs. Ruby or the McFarlands didn’t just happen to walk by anytime soon.
Monroe sat across from her and leaned forward. He shook his head. “I’m still amazed you’re here.”
“I came to find you,” Elizabeth said. She couldn’t look at him, so she kept her eyes on her hands, which were clasped in her lap.
“After all these years . . . why? Honestly, I’d thought you dead. I mourned you, Lizzie.”
She squeezed her eyes shut. She was a terrible person to have caused her own brother such pain.
“Will you at least tell me why? I deserve that much.”
She took a deep breath. “Colin died.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Monroe said stiffly.
Elizabeth opened her eyes and glanced up at him. His mouth was set in a line, and his feelings about her former husband were evident in the hard set of his jaw. “I was not,” she barely whispered.
He tilted his head, obviously confused.
“He was . . . Our marriage . . .” Several years’ worth of tears that had been held back seemed to climb up Elizabeth’s throat, and she pressed a hand to her mouth until the feeling passed. “It wasn’t what I expected it to be,” she said as fast as she could. She didn’t trust herself not to break down completely. “He was angry and cruel and distant. He hated mining and he seemed to take it out on me.”
“He hurt you?” Monroe’s hands had balled into fists.
“Not physically,” she said. “Never like that. But it was miserable.”
He relaxed some, but not entirely. “I tried to tell you—”
“I know you did. And I’m sorry I didn’t listen. Monroe, I’m so sorry for everything. I always meant to write you, not that it excuses the way I left. But when things turned out so badly, I couldn’t bring myself to. What would I have said?”
“You could have told me how unhappy you were. I would’ve sent you train fare to return to the ranch.” He closed his eyes briefly before opening them again to look at her. “We waited for you, Colette and I. For nearly a year. I was afraid you’d write and I wouldn’t be there to receive your letter. We didn’t leave until it finally became obvious you weren’t going to write. I had no way of knowing where you were, no way to search for you. Can you imagine how that felt?”
Elizabeth nodded. She bit down hard on her lip to keep the emotions that rolled through her at bay. “Monroe, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what else to say. I was wrong and there is no way for me to make that up to you now.”
He said nothing, not right away, and Elizabeth decided to ask a question that had been on her mind. “What happened with Colette?”
Monroe folded his hands together. “She died, about two and a half years ago now. It nearly killed me too. Then I met Emma.”
“I’m so sorry,” Elizabeth said. “I should have been there.”
He sat back in the chair, silent again. After a moment, he gestured at the tree. “I’ve been told you decorated this entire hotel for Christmas.”
She smiled a bit as she thought of Landon cutting down that tree and the girls helping her make decorations. “I didn’t do it alone.”
Monroe’s eyes drifted back to her. “I’m sure you made him a fine wife, Lizzie. It isn’t your fault he was a terrible husband.”
They were exactly the words she needed to hear. And now there was no holding it back. It was as if a dam had burst under a raging river. The tears started to fall, one by one. Elizabeth hid her face in her hands, unable, for the first time in seven years, to stop it from happening.
Comforting arms wrapped around her. Her brother. The only family she had left.
“I’m so happy to see you,” he said. “This was the best Christmas gift I could’ve asked for.”
Elizabeth let herself cry, and Monroe held her up. She didn’t care if anyone was watching. People bustled around her, and the train whistle announced the six thirty was leaving the depot for Cañon City, but it didn’t matter. She was home, and her brother was here. When she could cry no more, she backed up and wiped her face with her hands.
“Elizabeth?”
She turned to a voice behind her. It was Hannah. Her veins seemed to go immediately cold. “Is everything all right with Mr. Cooper?”
Hannah smiled. “It’s more than all right. He awoke a while ago. He asked for some soup, so I came to fetch you. It took me a bit to find you, but I thought you might wish to bring it to him.”
Elizabeth couldn’t contain the joy that leapt from her heart. He was awake! He would be fine. “Yes, I will. Right away. Thank you, Hannah!”
As Hannah left, Monroe smiled at his sister. “I’d heard you’d become quite the nurse.”
“I don
’t know about that,” Elizabeth said. “But I’m happy to see him awake and well.”
“Then go get that soup. We’ll talk more later.”
She gave him another quick hug before walking as fast as she could to the kitchen. One of the kitchen boys ladled her some chicken soup, and Elizabeth wrapped the bowl in a towel to keep it hot. She was careful not to spill a drop on her way back to Landon. He’d need every bit of this soup to rebuild his energy and remain healthy.
She knocked at the door before entering. “I’m so happy you’re awake. I’ve brought you some—” Elizabeth stopped still in the doorway.
The bed was empty.
Chapter Twenty-four
Landon stood across the street from Murray’s Saloon. He’d asked around after arriving in Cañon City just an hour ago. It hadn’t taken long at all to discover Redmond’s whereabouts. It was nearing midnight—and Christmas Day. Redmond and his other acquaintances from ranches and drives past were in that saloon, likely wondering where he was.
He’d made his way out of the hotel in minutes after he awoke, just in time to board the northbound train. When it arrived, he’d disembarked and walked here. And now he couldn’t even bring himself to cross the street.
Instead, he stood in the freezing air amid piles of snow from the blizzard, thinking about how sad it was to spend one’s Christmas Eve in a saloon.
What he wouldn’t give to be back in the Crest Stone Hotel. He grabbed hold of a nearby post as a wave of heat made him lightheaded. The fever might have broken, but he wasn’t fully recovered. In fact, he’d slept most of the train ride to Cañon City. He was weak, and what he really needed was a warm fire and a bowl of hot soup.
Landon backed up a few steps until he could lean against the wall of the hardware store. He still needed to sit, but maybe this would at least let him catch his breath before he made his way across the road. He closed his eyes—just for a moment. Elizabeth’s face appeared, and he smiled.
She’d taken care of him while he was ill. Each time he opened his eyes, she was there, checking his forehead, stoking the fire, or simply sitting next to him. Except . . . she didn’t want him. She’d said as much while she thought he was sleeping. Just the memory of those words tore through Landon’s heart like a knife through skin.
Those were the words that had spurred him to come here. To drag himself out of his sickbed, leave his horse behind, and spend even more of his savings to buy a ticket north to Cañon City. To push himself almost to the door of this saloon on Christmas Eve. To accept the only choice he had.
Landon straightened. The world swayed a little, and he steadied himself with a hand against the wall before moving forward. Yet once he reached the edge of the plank sidewalk, he couldn’t step down.
His heart felt as if it were beating inside his head, a drum against his skull, and he thought he might be sick. He pressed a hand against his stomach and tried to steel himself. Luckily, no one was passing on this side of the street so late. He was alone in his misery.
Wheeling backward, he braced himself against the wall again. Why couldn’t he seem to move forward? This was his last chance. If he didn’t go inside that saloon now and find Redmond, he could forget joining up with them this winter. He could forget finally having enough money for his own place. He’d already spent more than he’d intended at the hotel. He needed that money.
And yet he didn’t move.
I was so upset with you when you left. Elizabeth’s voice again. Landon frowned. He’d run that line—and everything else she’d said while he was “asleep”—through his head over and over, and yet he hadn’t really thought about what she meant. He’d put all his attention on the last part, where she more or less said he was a no-good cowboy and that she should’ve known better than to spend time with him. But that first part . . .What did she mean? Why was she angry with him?
He tried to keep his breathing even as he wiped the sweat from his brow. It wasn’t normal to be this hot outside in December. He was still sick. He needed to be in bed. He needed to be back at the hotel.
And he needed to talk to Elizabeth.
Every moment they’d shared those last couple of days before he’d gone out in the snow to rescue the train passengers ran through his mind. He was searching for a clue, something to tell him why she’d felt that way. And then he found one.
It was that moment he’d felt her close off to him. The one that had bothered him all the way to the derailed train, and the one he’d forgotten about as the rescue was underway.
She was angry that he was leaving.
Of course, at that time, he’d planned to ask her to wait for him before he actually left. He hadn’t had the time or the privacy to do so before the rescue, and then he’d fallen sick and overheard her, and now he was here.
Landon kicked his boot against the wall. How could he have been so stupid? He was so overcome with his own feelings about her supposed rejection of him when, really, she wasn’t rejecting him at all. She was protecting her own heart against what she’d perceived as his rejection.
He had to go back to the hotel. Forget the saloon. Forget Redmond. He’d find another way. How, he didn’t know, but he knew one thing for absolute certain—he couldn’t go on without talking to Elizabeth. It didn’t matter now if she disapproved of his original plans, because now he disapproved of them. It was ridiculous to think he could spend the rest of his life with her keeping that secret. And what would’ve happened if he’d gotten caught? He’d been so focused on the money, he’d barely considered that possibility. He’d lost Elizabeth already because of his plans, and he hadn’t even gone through with them.
No, he’d go back. He’d tell her everything—including how he felt. If she wanted him, a cowboy who would take years to earn enough for his own spread, then he’d ask her to marry him. And if he wasn’t good enough for her, then so be it. At least he’d still have his honor and his integrity. He’d find another way to get what he wanted, somehow.
But first, he had to get back to the hotel.
Chapter Twenty-five
Christmas morning dawned bright and clear. Sarah had already dressed and gone downstairs by the time Elizabeth woke. Elizabeth gazed out the window after she dressed, trying to summon the happiness she knew she should feel on this day. Her friends were getting married, her brother was here, and everyone would be sharing Christmas cheer downstairs. But Elizabeth had to force herself to smile.
Landon was gone.
She shouldn’t have been surprised. After all, he’d said he planned to leave. She just hadn’t expected it to be so soon. And on Christmas Eve, of all days. He was still sick, and she hadn’t even had a chance to speak with him after he woke. He just disappeared, as if speaking with her were the last thing he wanted to do.
She sighed and left the window. It did her no good to stand here, mourning the loss of something she’d never really had. She checked herself one last time in front of the small glass that sat on the dressing table. She’d put on a cheerful face for Penny and Dora, even if she didn’t feel cheerful at all inside.
Elizabeth paused at the landing and looked down to the lobby. There weren’t many people downstairs yet. She spotted both Penny and Dora in conversation near the tree. Penny gestured at something as Dora shook her head. The image drew a smile to Elizabeth’s face. The several feet of snow that now sat outside the hotel had scuttled Penny’s plans for outdoor weddings. The ceremonies would now take place in the lobby, and Elizabeth could only imagine what wild idea Penny was proposing to Dora at that moment.
She wrapped her hands around the railing. Her friends had been a comfort to her last night when she’d discovered Landon had left. They’d set aside their wedding preparations to sit with her while she cried—again!—and tried as hard as she could to assure them this was for the best. Of course, she had yet to truly believe that as much as she knew she should.
Landon was an unreliable, selfish cowboy. It was good he was gone. Now she could move on with her new
life here as a Gilbert Girl. Perhaps she’d stay here forever and never marry. It wouldn’t be such a terrible life, living in this beautiful hotel with so many other women for company.
Although it would be much easier if she hadn’t fallen in love with Landon.
She’d realized that late last night, as she lay awake in bed. It had hurt so much because she loved him. The empty feeling in her heart seemed as if it would last a lifetime. But it wouldn’t, she knew. It would diminish with time, although she doubted it would ever disappear entirely.
In her heart, she knew this was what she deserved. She’d left her brother with only a hastily scrawled note, and Landon had now left her without a word. She now knew how it felt to be abandoned.
She ran her hands over the railing, willing herself not to cry yet again. It seemed that ever since she’d finally let go with Monroe, the tears were poised to fall again at any moment. It was as if she’d broken a dam inside. When she gathered herself, she descended the stairs. Penny and Dora were so distracted they didn’t even notice her as she walked quietly behind them to the tree.
It still stood, tall and beautiful against the frost that covered the lower part of the window. Gifts dangled from the boughs and sat beneath it now, including the ones Elizabeth had purchased for her new friends. They’d all agreed to exchange gifts once the wedding festivities and the luncheon were concluded, but before that night’s Christmas dinner.
“Merry Christmas!” Adelaide called from the door of the dining room. She and Sarah joined Elizabeth by the tree.
“Merry Christmas,” Elizabeth said in return, even if it felt anything but merry to her.
“Isn’t it magnificent?” Sarah said, gazing at the tree. “We never had anything so grand at home.”
Elizabeth nodded, grateful for a conversation that had nothing to do with Landon. “My family never had a tree either, although from what I remember, my mother loved to decorate and bake.”
