I click the door shut, my heart hammering in my chest, an inferno coursing through my lines. I need time to disperse my power. And to sort out what’s true and what’s false in what I’ve just heard.
It was a terrible mistake, coming back here.
The thought gains traction as the magic strafing through me ratchets higher, a stiff thread of defiance tightening my gut.
On impulse, I reach out toward the door and throw the lock firmly into place.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
ALLIANCE
ELLOREN GARDNER
Sixth Month
Valgard, Gardneria
Tiny black vines curl through the door’s brass lock, and it clicks open.
Lukas opens the door, strides into the room, and shuts it, then sets the lock back into place as the vines disappear.
He cocks a brow at me. “You honestly thought you could lock me out?” He glances back at the door’s lock before shooting me a look of incredulity.
I grab a wooden-handled hairbrush from the vanity beside me and level it at him threateningly, my power streaming toward the wood in a staggering rush.
My arm trembles as I back away a step, a cornered defiance whipping through me. “I heard everything you and your father just said, Lukas. And now you’re going to listen to me. There’s no way I’m going to let you or Vogel or anyone else control me. And I am not fully Sealing this fasting.”
Lukas calmly takes in the hairbrush. He nods, his gaze darting once more to the door, then back to me. “Elloren,” he says, a sliver of urgency running through his measured tone, “put the hairbrush down.”
“I don’t know what to believe,” I throw out at him as chaotic power sparks through my arm, straining toward the River Maple brush, “but if one single thing that you told your father is true, I will fight you, Lukas. You have no idea what I’m capable of.”
Lukas splays his hands out in a conciliatory gesture. “I kissed you. I have a pretty good idea.” He turns one hand over and holds it out, palm up, his tone calm but firm. “Elloren, give me the brush.”
Jaw clenched, my hand trembling with indecision, I lower the brush a fraction.
Lukas loses his easy expression, strides over to me, takes the brush in hand, then opens the woodstove’s glass door and throws it into the fire, flames rearing as the brush ignites. Then he moves to the windows and tugs the curtains shut.
He turns and closes in on me, his voice a determined whisper. “You need to tell me everything.”
My outrage hardens. “Was anything you just said to your father true?”
Lukas’s face tenses with concern. “No. Except the part about Vogel insisting on a formal Sealing.”
My thoughts cyclone as I glare up at him. “I want to be able to trust you.”
He loosens a breath, his gaze steady on mine. “Elloren,” he calmly but firmly says, “I can’t lie to you. You know that. Just like you can’t lie to me.” His lips quirk into a jaded half smile. “Believe me, I’ve tried.”
I turn this over in my harrowed mind. He’s right. If anything, our Dryad pull to honesty seems to be getting stronger.
The corner of Lukas’s mouth lifts further. “Go ahead. Try it,” he prods. “Try lying to me. Tell me...” He pauses, his gaze turning inward as if he’s searching for a suitable lie. He levels his eyes back on mine, his smile playing at the edges of his mouth. “Tell me that you don’t find me attractive.”
I gape at Lukas, deeply put off by humor at such a time. I square my shoulders and narrow a glare at him. “I don’t find...” The words cinch in like a wall closing in around my throat. Like choking without the loss of air. I struggle to push the false words out, to fling them at him, but they stay caught. I force out a growl of frustration instead.
Lukas’s feral grin widens. “I wouldn’t be able to say it either.”
“I find you infuriating!” I spit out. “There, that’s easy to say.” I pull back from him, my emotions a tumult as I shoot him a potent glare. “Chi Nam is my friend. I don’t want you to kill her even if you’re ordered to. She was kind to me when no one else was.”
Lukas gives a wry laugh. He pulls Chi Nam’s rune stone from his tunic’s pocket and hands it to me.
I take it from him and thrust the rune stone protectively into my tunic’s pocket, running my fingers over the smooth stone, yearning for its calming aura as my emotions churn.
Lukas leans in. “Chi Nam is a friend to the Vu Trin political agenda. Period.” He lifts a finger to swiftly trace the side of my neck. “Thwart that, and she’ll slit this pretty little throat of yours without a moment’s hesitation.”
I back away from his touch and toward the canopy post behind me.
It’s all too much, such matter-of-fact talk of someone murdering me. I glance around blankly, the whole situation surreal and bearing down on me. My hand finds the canopy post and I grip the Ironwood, my unstable power flaring violently inside of me.
Lukas’s hand comes back to my arm, his look of urgency back. “Tell me exactly how much power you can access.”
Tears sting at my eyes as I cling to the post. “More than my grandmother ever had,” I say, my voice a low rasp. “They took me to the desert. To train me.”
“The Vu Trin?”
I nod tightly. “They gave me a flimsy wand. I said the candle-lighting spell.” I pause, remembering. My mouth pulls down into a trembling grimace. “There was an ocean of fire. If they hadn’t put up a shield, I would have killed everyone I was with. I killed Ni Vin’s horse. I melted it.”
Surprise lights Lukas’s eyes. He pulls in a deep breath. “You did that. With the candle-lighting spell?”
I nod and tell him everything.
When Lukas speaks, it’s slow and with emphasis, his tone disturbingly matter-of-fact. “We have at most two days before the Vu Trin kill you or Vogel figures out you’re the Black Witch.”
A harder panic takes hold and I swallow, desperation surging. “Can we get out of here?”
“We’re surrounded by Vogel’s entire guard.”
“So, what do we do?”
He sharpens his gaze on me. “We stage a diversion and escape.”
Clarity descends. “The Sealing ceremony.”
“Yes,” Lukas affirms. “Vogel might have just handed us a way past him by forcing this on us.”
Dread rises at the thought of that Shadow Wand anywhere near us both.
“Lukas, Vogel’s Wand has demonic power in it, and he’ll use it to reset the Sealing spell.”
He nods, jaw tense, a hard look in his eyes. “We’re going to have to risk having the magic reset with that Wand. I can’t think of a way around it.”
A maelstrom of emotions war inside me. “But you think we might have a chance of escaping?”
“We might. I think a formal Sealing will provide the ultimate distraction. Gardnerians love Sealing ceremonies. The vicarious thrill of a virgin’s deflowering. And not just any virgin, mind you—Carnissa Gardner’s granddaughter.”
Ire rises, overtaking my near panic. “That’s in really poor taste, Lukas.”
“The whole thing is in incredibly poor taste,” Lukas concurs, surprising me. “And we’re going to use it against them.”
A hard spark of triumph lights within me at the idea of using the Gardnerians’ awful wandfasting traditions as a weapon aimed squarely at them.
“When would we leave?” I venture.
Lukas hesitates. “I can think of only one window.”
My mind casts about, quickly lighting on that window.
The Blessing of Dominion. It would have to be then. The morning after the Sealing ceremony and just after the Sealing breakfast. When the couple is required, by The Book of the Ancients, to enter the wilds alone and scatter the ashes of a destroyed tree to symbolize the Magedom’s dominion over Erthia, the time s
pent in the woods open-ended.
“The Blessing of Dominion,” I say.
He gives me a weighted look. “It would have to be then.”
The full implications of this wash over me. We wouldn’t just be resealing our fasting as a ruse. To get past Vogel, we’ll have to really seal it this time, the consummation of our union absolutely required to fully set the magic, our fastlines flowing down our wrists afterward and blessed by the priest at the Sealing breakfast.
Blessed by Vogel.
And after that, the Blessing of Dominion.
An uncomfortable flush heats my neck as an aching grief takes hold. Nothing was supposed to be like this. I was supposed to be with Yvan.
Who would want me to survive. Even if it means putting aside my shattered heart to align with someone else in every way.
“The Blessing provides a good window,” I say, the tenacious will to escape hardening inside me even as grief shears through my emotions.
“It’s the only gap in their defenses I can find,” Lukas says, his brow tensed. “I’d leave now if we could. But we’re surrounded. And being carefully watched. Both of us.”
A new fear sparks. “Do you think Vogel suspects what I am?”
Lukas’s split-second hesitation causes that spark of fear to catch flame.
“No,” he finally says. “If he did, he’d have brought you into custody by now. But I think he suspects that you’re a traitor like your brothers. Vogel can sniff out rebellion and, Elloren, you reek of it.”
My defiance heats up. “Unlike you, with your unquestioning obedience?”
“They don’t question my loyalty,” Lukas counters. “Just my morality and gravity.”
“And your piety,” I acerbically note.
Lukas spits out a bitter sound. “There is my complete lack of piety.”
Our gazes lock and hold for a brief moment, a new understanding seeming to solidify between us.
“A Sealing will likely dampen their suspicions about both of us,” I cede, giving him a jaded look.
Lukas nods, meeting my look with a cynical one of his own. “You’ll need to act broken. And firmly under my control.”
“I know,” I snipe, fire ratcheting up at the thought. “But one thing needs to be clear, Lukas. Regardless of what they’ll all think, I won’t let you control me. And you’ll never own me. Even if we seal this fasting.”
Lukas’s look turns blazing in its intensity. “We are friends,” he says emphatically. “And as such, equals. I want you to control yourself. And I want you to come into full control of your power.”
Moved by his sentiment, I think on how Lukas relinquished all control over me after our fasting. When he could have, by law, mandated my every move.
I study him, his intense gaze unwavering, as some of the force of my defiance lessens. I believe him. And I know that we’ve fallen into an unexpected but genuine alliance.
An alliance that could serve something far bigger and more important than us both.
As if sensing my changing feelings, Lukas’s lips form a grim smile. “Play the submissive fastmate for the moment. Once you’re trained in the use of your power, Vogel will be intimidated by you. Along with everyone else on Erthia.”
I cast him an edgy look, unable to keep the resurgence of outrage from my tone. “I heard your whole conversation with your father, you know. He really loves the idea of you beating me.”
Lukas lets out a short laugh, tinged with disgust. “Because that works so well. He beat me regularly throughout my entire childhood.”
I inwardly wince at this as I hold his gaze, a moment of emotional candor passing between us. Outraged now on his behalf, I give him a look of solidarity. “You are the absolute picture of docile submission.”
Lukas gives another short laugh but then his smile fades. There’s genuine concern in his gaze now. Concern for me.
I inhale as I glance down at our fastmarked hands. “I will admit,” I say as rebellion simmers inside me, “part of me likes the idea of using the Magedom’s horrid fasting traditions against them. It’s awful. Especially for women.”
“It is,” Lukas firmly concurs, a shrewd glint forming in his eyes. “So, we weaponize it. And aim it directly at them.”
His words stoke my rebellion as I glance once more at the matching lines on our hands, feeling heartened that Lukas holds as much contempt for the “Sacred” Sacraments of Fasting and Sealing as I do.
Agreement settles between us, surprising in its strength.
“There was a time,” I admit, “when I seriously considered fasting to you. You should know that. And it wasn’t just for your money. Or your power.”
A flash of warmth ignites in Lukas’s eyes as his affinity fire momentarily escapes his control. “Elloren,” he says, his tone gaining an impassioned edge, “I wanted to fast to you from the moment I first laid eyes on you.”
Remorse and grief well up inside me in response to his heated admission. My eyes prick with tears that I struggle to blink back. Because I do have feelings for Lukas, but the loss of Yvan is a spear clear through my heart.
Overwhelmed by conflict and sorrow, I look at Lukas, staring into those forest green eyes of his. Lukas reaches up to caress my cheek, my hair, his touch featherlight, his expression slightly pained. Moved by his attempt to comfort me, I wipe away my brimming tears and pause at the brink of this new thing between us as I take in the level of emotion in Lukas’s eyes.
I feel devastated by the loss of Yvan. But circumstances will not allow time for my heart to recover. And Lukas is here, ready to fight alongside me. Ready to risk his own life for me and bind himself to me in every way.
“I want you to know,” I haltingly tell Lukas, “that in time...I feel like I could care for you as more than a friend. Possibly a great deal. But right now...” Grief for Yvan constricts my chest, choking off the words.
Lukas’s eyes tighten, the pain in them edged with understanding. His arm drops to my shoulder, but his touch remains gentle and comforting, his thumb tracing a short line back and forth across the silk of my tunic.
My voice is throaty with tears when it comes. “I can’t seal to you purely for escape. Not if we’re going to consummate it. I know we’re both being forced into this, but...if I’m going to be sealed to you, I have to actually be sealed to you.”
Lukas stays quiet, and it feels like we can both sense the seismic emotional shift happening between us.
“I want to be sealed to you,” Lukas states unequivocally. “Truly sealed.”
Feeling like I’m quietly taking a dive off an impossibly high cliff, I press back my grief and meet his deep-green gaze steadily.
“All right, Lukas,” I say, holding his fervent stare. “Let’s truly seal this fasting.”
Lukas’s expression shifts, the gravity of this decision stark in it, stark in us both. “Tomorrow eve,” he finally says, his voice pitched low. “Mother will arrange things.”
My hackles rise, the mention of his mother reminding me of the dangers at hand and slicing through this moment of closeness between us. “Lukas, I’m certain your mother arranged for the Banes to attack me.”
Lukas frowns. “Damion Bane won’t be attacking anyone anytime soon,” he says, a hard glint forming in his eyes. “I won’t be killing Chi Nam, but he is on my list.”
Trepidation spikes. “Damion may be suspicious about me. He sensed my power when he attacked me.”
“We’ll be long gone before his suspicions are of any consequence.”
“But your mother...she’s a real threat. She wants to drive me out of the Realm. Or worse.”
“Well, she can’t drive you out,” he says shortly. “Not with Vogel presiding at the Sealing. And the minute there’s a possibility that I’ve got you with child, she’ll leave you alone.”
I cough and emphatically slice thro
ugh the air with both hands. “No one is getting me with child.”
Lukas shoots me a look of incredulity. “Elloren, of course not. I’ve Sanjire root.”
I’m relieved to hear he has the pregnancy-preventing root, but still, anger churns hot over Evelyn and Lachlan Grey’s cruelty, particularly toward women. “Your family is vile,” I spit out at him.
Lukas’s face tenses and the anger and bottomless hurt that’s momentarily laid bare in his expression is so intense that I instantly regret saying this.
His mouth rearranges itself into a tight line. “Yes, Elloren. I know my family is vile.”
Instantly abashed, I hold Lukas’s intense gaze, trying to convey that I’m sorry for the harshness of my words even though the sentiment is true. Understanding seems to pass between us, his expression losing its severe edge. I bring my hand up to massage my newly aching forehead as my mind casts about, attempting to piece together this plan for escape.
“So...we’ll be sealed tomorrow night,” I say.
Lukas nods. “And leave the next morning.”
I cough out a laugh in response to his brazen level of understatement. “You mean we’ll run for our lives.”
Lukas’s confident aura doesn’t budge. “We’ll have to travel over the mountains to avoid the current hostilities at the Pass, but yes, we’ll need to get East as fast as we can. And from there to Noi lands, where I’ll train you in the use of your magic and organize an army.”
I eye him with disbelief. “The Vu Trin want me dead, Lukas.”
“We’ll win them over.”
“But...”
“We’ll convince them by force if necessary. We need their dragons.”
“You think we can make it through the desert all the way to Noi lands?”
“That’s the wild card in all this, but I believe we can get there. If we’re lucky. The Sealing might buy us enough time and enough of a lead to get to the Eastern Realm.” Lukas lets out a long breath. “We have to get out soon in any case because Vogel is rune warding the entire border.”
The Shadow Wand Page 27
