“Okay, ready?” Cady takes a deep, exaggerated breath, looking at Wren to do the same. Together, they begin to sing.
“Tank-tank-bo-bank…”
It’s the most beautiful fuckin’ thing I’ve ever heard.
When they’re finished, I whistle low and do a slow clap.
“Man alive, you two are some excellent singers,” I rumble. “That’s some talent. And you paint, too. I’m in the presence of greatness!”
A tiny burble of a giggle erupts from Wren. On impulse, I kneel down to her level.
“Good job, Wren.”
I notice the leather thong peeking out from the neck of her T-shirt. She’s been wearing my Saint Gerard medal ever since I gave it to her. I haven’t taken it back, because I figured maybe somehow it made her feel safe.
But as I look into her shining eyes, something shifts inside me.
It means something to me that she’s wearing it. I want her to think of it as a connection between us. Something I gave her.
I slowly reach up and adjust it, pulling the medallion slowly out of her shirt, so it’s on the outside.
“I’m proud of you, you know that?” I tell her, keeping my voice low.
I lock eyes with the little munchkin. But I start to get choked up again, so I stand before I can make a fool of myself.
And as I do, I catch Cady staring at me.
I clear my throat. “Wren, hang on for a couple seconds, okay?” I croak out. “I wanna talk to Cady for just a second.”
We go across the room to a quiet spot by the window. I glance away from her, feeling kind of embarrassed at how fuckin’ emotional I am.
“You got her to talk,” I manage.
“Well, to sing,” Cady corrects me softly. “But she also said ‘juice’ when I asked her what she wanted to drink a little while ago. So I think we’re making progress.”
“Holy shit. She’s practically a chatterbox,” I joke. “But seriously. I don’t know how you did it.”
“Patience, I guess.” She shrugs.
“Yeah, that ain’t something I got a lot of.”
Cady snickers. “I gathered that.”
“So…” I hesitate. “Thanks.
She gives me a small smile. Then, shooting a quick glance across the room, she hesitates.
“Hey, listen,” she murmurs, “Wren’s really having a good time here, and she’s not finished making the bracelet she’s working on. So, I was wondering… do you want to stay for dinner? We could order a pizza. I think it’d be nice for her to just hang out a little longer before it’s time to go home.”
I want to say no. But something stops me. Maybe it’s because Cady’s right. Wren looks content as hell over there working on her little craft thing. It’s unusual enough to see her like that that I hate the thought of taking her away from it.
But there’s something else, too, I guess.
I’m tired. I’ve had a shitty day, and going back home to play single parent to a little kid who I feel like I’m failing just ain’t that appealing right now. And even though that music playing on the stereo is starting to get on my nerves, it sounds kinda good to just sit here and watch my daughter be happy for a little while longer.
“I’ve got beer,” Cady says, quirking a brow. “If that sways you at all.”
It doesn’t sway me, exactly. But it’s all the excuse I need to admit defeat.
“Sure, why not,” I concede. “Pizza and beer it is.”
11
Tank
Some time later, the empty pizza box is all that’s left of our meal. We got half pepperoni and half cheese, and Wren even ate the cheese part. She’s sacked out on Cady’s bed behind a Japanese screen, dead to the world from all the excitement of her day. Cady and I are sitting on the couch, nursing our beers.
“This has been a good day,” Cady sighs, sinking back into the cushions and closing her eyes.
“It has,” I admit. “I still can’t believe you got Wren to talk.”
“It was a flash of inspiration. But I didn’t really plan it, it just occurred to me and I decided to try.”
“You’re good with her. You’re good for her.” I take a swig from my bottle. “I don’t think I’m really cut out to be a dad.”
The word sounds strange on my tongue. I’ve avoided saying I’m Wren’s father out loud. Mostly because I don’t feel like I’m cut out to be anyone’s parent.
“You are.” Cady turns to me and fixes me with a serious expression. “I get that it’s not easy. Especially with a little girl.”
I shake my head. “You got that right. My life experiences up to this point haven’t exactly taught me how to do any of this. Hell, just brushing her hair or giving her a bath… Hell, I’d rather be outnumbered and cornered in an alley by a rival MC than this shit. At least there I know what I’m up against.”
“You’re learning, though.” Her eyes twinkle. “Her hair isn’t as much of a rat’s nest as it used to be.”
“Thanks for the compliment,” I say, mock-offended.
“I mean, it was a compliment. But yeah, you’re not the greatest at doing hair, that’s for sure.”
“You’re pushing your luck,” I warn. “Good thing for you I ain’t in the mood to argue my case.”
She pauses a second, fidgeting with a stray thread sticking out of the sofa. “So….” she drawls, “since I’m already pushing my luck, can I ask you something?”
“You can ask. No guarantee I’ll answer.”
“What’s the whole story with Wren, anyway? You never really told me how she came to be in your care.”
I cut a sharp glance at Cady, ready to go on the defensive. But what I see in her expression isn’t judgment. Just genuine concern for Wren. The suspicion I remember radiating from Cady on the day I met her isn’t there anymore.
For some reason, the softness in her eyes makes me feel tired of pretending to myself this situation with Wren is temporary. When the fact is, I don’t even know what the fuck it is anymore. I haven’t talked to anyone about this. But for some reason, I find myself wanting to tell Cady.
“Wren showed up on my doorstep on Halloween night,” I mutter, leaning back against the cushions. “Alone. With a note that said, ‘She’s yours. You can protect her better than I can.’ Signed Jess.”
Cady wrinkles her nose. “Protect her?” she repeats. “From what?”
“Your guess is as good as mine,” I shrug. “Maybe she was just bein’ dramatic.”
“So, Jess is an ex-girlfriend?”
“Not even that. She’s just some chick I banged a few times. She used to hang around the club for a while. If she’s the one I’m thinkin’ of.”
“Gross,” Cady mutters.
“Look, yeah, I’ve been with a few women.” I spread my hands. “More than a few. But they were all consenting adults. So what’s the problem?”
More than consenting, actually. Most of them were pretty enthusiastic and vocal.
Cady just shakes her head. “No problem. You’re an adult. So look, the horse is kinda out of the barn at this point, but have you ever heard of these things called condoms?” she snarks.
“I did use a condom.”
Cady rolls her eyes at me.
“I mean, it’s none of my business, but do you expect me to buy that?” she scoffs. “You can’t even remember which Jess this woman is, out of a cast of thousands, apparently.”
“Not thousands.” Hundreds, maybe. “But I did use a condom,” I insist. “I know that.”
“How can you possibly know that?”
“I always use condoms. I don’t take fuckin’ chances.”
“Always?”
“Literally every single time,” I insist.
She takes a moment to digest that.
“Well, that doesn’t make any sense.” She squints at me. “How did you end up with a kid, then?”
I shrug. “I dunno. Don’t they say they’re only, what, ninety-eight percent effective?”
Damn, when yo
u think about it like that… does that mean two times out of a hundred rubbers don’t work?
Fuck me…
“Okay. So, the condom broke. Whatever,” she says, making it clear that she still doesn’t quite believe me. “And you can at least narrow it down to a few dozen Jessicas. You don’t have any of their phone numbers or anything?”
I shrug again. “Like I told you, they weren’t girlfriends. They were just…”
“Fuck buddies.”
“Yeah.”
Cady blows out a breath. “Unbelievable…” She trails off, then blinks. “Well, look. Now that Wren is talking, you can just ask her her last name. She’s old enough to know it.”
I blink. “Shit. Why didn’t I think of that?”
“I get the feeling you’ve been a little too close to the situation. You’re welcome. Again.”
Cady lets out a throaty laugh, tipping back her head and exposing her long, gorgeous neck.
And just like that, I’m back to having thoughts about her that I’ve been trying like hell to stop having.
Maybe it’s because I haven’t fucked anyone since before Halloween. Haven’t even gotten my dick sucked by one of the club girls. So it could be I’m just horny as shit. But I’ve been thinking about Cady in any number of filthy ways since the day I first met her.
Hell, ordinarily I probably would have done something about it by now. I’ll grant you, she’s a lot different from the women I generally take to bed. She’s smarter, for one thing. Mouthier, for sure. And pig-headed as hell. But I see something in her eyes when she looks at me. I know that look. It means she might not say no if I suggested spending some time getting down and dirty together.
But I got way too much on my fuckin’ plate right now to add any more complications to my life, what with Wren, and all the club shit going on. A blow job from one of the club girls is one thing. Starting something up with a fireball like this girl is another thing entirely.
Something tells me that shit would be the definition of complicated.
Try telling my dick that, though. I’ve jerked off more times than I can count, thinking about the girl in front of me. Just last night, in fact. My favorite fantasy so far involves Cady in the diner. It’s after hours and she’s the only one there, cleaning up. I show up, and she lets me in, giving me that saucy look of hers, like she wants me to think she’s gonna say no but she’s actually gonna say yes. Instead of those black yoga pants, she’s got on a tight little black mini skirt, and I come up behind her and slide my hand under it to find her panties soaking wet for me. Cady moans and arches her back, her ass pressing against my cock. Then I turn her around, lay her back on the table of one of the booths, and fuck her hard and fast as she writhes under me…
“Tank?”
I snap back into reality as my cock throbs in my jeans.
“Sorry,” I mumble, shifting on the couch. “Got distracted.”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
Cady’s cocking her head at me, a little smirk on her face. Almost like she knows where my mind went. Goddamnit.
To change the subject, I ask Cady a question I’ve been meaning to ask anyway. “Hey, look. Would you be willing to take care of Wren again sometime? I don’t have a lot of people I can trust with her. And you’re really good with her.”
She sucks in a breath. “Sure, of course. I offered before, remember?”
“Yeah. I know. I just didn’t want to assume.”
“I like Wren. She’s such a sweet girl. Her little face just breaks my heart. She… reminds me of someone.”
“Yeah? Who?”
She pauses a beat. Something flickers on her face. “My sister.”
“That’s right. I remember you saying you have a sister.”
She looks away. “No. I said I had a little sister.”
The word comes out harsh, raw. Like it’s being torn from her throat. When Cady looks back at me, her eyes are glistening.
“Shit. I guess I didn’t really catch that. I’m sorry.”
“Her name was Cassie,” she says softly. “She was actually my half-sister. She was ten years younger than me.”
“Fuck. How did she…?”
The second the words leave my lips, I know it’s the wrong thing to ask. Cady’s face instantly crumples. She swallows, loudly, painfully, and looks away.
“Die?” she whispers. “Neglect.”
The air in the room around us feels like it just got ten times heavier. We just steered ourselves into a conversation neither one of us wants to have.
“I’m sorry,” I say again. Goddamnit, I feel like a shit heel. I want to comfort her — put my arm around her or something — but I’m not sure that’s the right thing to do.
“Thanks,” she croaks. She lifts a hand, wipes at her eyes.
“Look, I should probably go.” Cursing myself for my sudden cowardice, I pull out some bills, set them between us. “Thanks for taking care of Wren, Cady. It means a lot to both of us. You’re the closest thing she has right now to…”
A mom.
“… a female figure in her life. She needs that.”
Cady sniffles, swipes at her eyes again. “It was my pleasure. Truly, I mean it.” She glances over toward the bed, her eyes tender.
“I’m glad.”
She swallows, then tosses her head. Her mood seems to shift like a weather vane. She gives me a saucy little smile that reminds me of my fantasy about the diner.
“You know, gratitude looks good on you,” she smirks. “You should try it more often.”
You’d look good with those luscious lips of yours wrapped around my cock… Or my hand wrapped in your hair…
Fuck. A second ago I was feelin’ all sorry for Cady, and now my dick is begging for attention again. All the blood rushing from my brain to my cock is making it hard to talk, so I don’t say anything at all. I just stand and go over to the bed to gather up Wren. I slip my arms under her and lift her up, making sure not to wake her.
“I’ll get her stuff and walk you out,” Cady half-whispers, picking up Snoopy and Wren’s backpack.
As we descend the stairs in silence, my brain is a big fuckin’ messed-up jumble.
As out of control as my life has felt ever since Wren came into it, Cady just makes it feel crazier, somehow.
Because I kind of need her. I’m not used to needing anyone.
But also, because she’s hot as sin.
I’m still half-hard and barely thinking straight as I fasten a sleeping Wren into the car seat. Cady hands me her backpack and Snoopy, and I toss them into the back, shutting the door as softly as I can.
“Can I call you tomorrow?” I ask Cady. “To work out a schedule for you taking Wren?”
She nods, looking up at me. “Of course.”
Her eyes are soft in the moonlight. Or hell, maybe it’s the light of the street lamp in the parking lot, I dunno. Her lips are slightly parted, and the light reflects off them, too.
Goddamnit, this girl is driving me fucking insane.
It wasn’t easy to ignore my attraction to her when she was pissing me off with her holier-than-thou attitude, but it was a damn sight easier than it is now. Now, she’s right here, so close I can feel the heat from her skin. So close I can see the way her breasts rise and fall with her breaths.
She’s got me so fucking tied up in knots that my own breathing stills, even as my cock hardens in my jeans.
“You…” I begin, then stop.
“Yes?”
Cady’s brow lowers into a slight frown as she waits for me to speak. But I fuckin’ can’t.
Everything I want to say right now can’t be said in words. I want her. My whole fucking body wants her. I’ve been trying to deny it ever since the day I met her. And right now, all the barriers I’ve tried to put in place to keep away from her are gone. It’s just her, and me, and the moonlit night.
“Tank?” she breathes.
I love the sound of my name on her lips. The way I can see the word as it mov
es in her throat.
I move toward her, closing the inches that separates us. The small, soft intake of her breath is the only thing I hear before I bury my hand in her hair and pull her lips to mine.
Her mouth opens to me immediately. Her gasp turns into a soft moan as I devour her mouth, stifling my own groan. God, it’s only when I finally have what I want, when I finally have her mouth, that the restraint I’ve been working so hard to maintain falls away.
I press her against the car, our tongues dancing together, seeking, tasting, finally telling the truth about the desire that we’ve been hiding from each other. My cock throbs, and Cady’s body writhes against me, her breathing coming fast and shallow. She clutches at me, as I swallow another moan that rips from her throat. God, it’s so fucking good. Too good. If my body somehow thought it could extinguish the fire that’s consuming me, it never reckoned for how this one kiss would throw gas on the flames.
I want to take her, to consume her. I want every inch of her body to belong to me. The kiss gets deeper, more frantic. The voice in my head takes over, words pounding in my brain like a heartbeat.
Mine. She’s mine. This is mine.
“Fuck,” I groan, ripping myself away from Cady’s lips. My cock is begging me not to stop, but I manage to call on the last remaining brain cell with any fucking sense at all.
I step away from her, noting that Cady is panting, her lips already swollen and bruised from my kiss.
“I, uh…” I mutter.
Jesus, Tank. Way to sound like a fuckin’ teenager.
“I better get going,” I manage to finish. Because if I don’t leave right fucking now, I’m gonna take Cady right up against my truck. And with my sleeping daughter in the back seat, that’s the kind of behavior that could earn me an appointment with Child Protective Services.
Cady sucks in a ragged breath.
“Okay,” she replies.
It’s so absurd that I almost laugh. Except I can’t laugh because my dick is screaming at me, wanting to know why we’re not about to score.
“Okay, then,” I agree lamely. “Go back upstairs so I know you’re safe.”
For once, she doesn’t argue with me. I climb into the cab of my truck, a little painfully, and wait for her to disappear inside. I back the truck up, giving her a one-finger wave that she probably can’t see.
TANK: Lords of Carnage MC Page 9
